Walk in clinic wichita falls tx

Wichita Falls, TX

2011.08.02 05:21 glamdr1ng Wichita Falls, TX

Wichita Falls, Tx

2011.05.16 20:10 Iriestx Reddit Chili Appreciation Society

2023.05.28 20:33 JesulyGR17 My life is completely empty

My life is completely empty. The only thing that matters to me is my dog and an impossible dream to fulfill. I enjoy watching wrestling, reading manga, watching a series or movie, or playing video games, but nothing else.
There is nothing that I like that I can dedicate myself to, and if there is, I am terrible at it. computer science studies I joined for no reason just makes me feel stupid. I am very afraid of the future, but at the same time, nothing matters to me. I don't want to live in this neighborhood, but wherever I go I only see grey, dull and dark. I would like to go to Swedish Lapland and see the Northern Lights, but I know I will never be able to do it on my own.
I don't love anyone, the day my dog dies, my humanity will go with him. I don't love my family, I don't love the people I know, nobody matters to me.
Just like I don't love anyone, nobody loves me. No one has shown interest in me. Maybe if I die someone will cry and be sad for a couple of days, but I won't leave an impact on anyone. I would like to live in a fantasy world where everyone has a friend, lover or brother they love, I want to have someone to give my life for.
I have considered running away, I would like to go somewhere where I can see the sea, but nothing will change if I leave, I will only become a stinking vagabond, and no one would care for me. Nobody is going to fall in love with me, I am not handsome and I have zero social skills. Still, maybe one day I will, the only thing holding me back is my mother. She doesn't realize how much she's making my life miserable, she doesn't see that I'm not a child and she treats me like one. I don't care starving on the side of the road, I want to do something, anything.
I have no aspirations. I can't even kill myself because I don't want to get hurt, what if I throw myself off a building and survive the fall? What if I hang myself and my neck doesn't break instantly? I don't want to feel physical pain.
I have ideas that if I say in public, they would laugh at me, it has already happened, in fact. Sometimes I think that having a serious conversation with someone is something that only happens in movies. For example, I once told a couple of classmates my thoughts about monogamy. I think that not having relationships with other people even if you want to is making a sacrifice without getting anything in return. It seems very selfish to me not to let your partner be with whoever she wants to be with, for me she is not disrespecting me or being disloyal for it. My classmates laughed at me for that idea, they don't have to agree with me, but there was no need to ridicule me for it either.
I have never been bullied (School), I may be ugly but at least I have always been big for my age. Although my older brother has hit, yelled at, spat at and ridiculed me on various occasions since I was little. Once when I was a kid, my parents weren't home and he brought a friend over. My brother and his friend took off my pants and ridiculed me for the size of my penis (Obviously, asshole. I'm a child). I ran to my room and hid under my bed, but they dragged me out and ridiculed me again for not defending myself.
He also threw me to the ground on another occasion and kicked me so that I would give him some savings that I had hidden. And he kicked my dog just for walking into his room. Luckily he left home about a year ago, I hate him with all my being.
That would be all, there are a couple of things that I would like to comment on or emphasize, but they are not that relevant. I'm sharing this in case anyone has valuable advice that can help me, thanks.
(Also, I'm from Seville, Spain. English is not my native language and i apologize if there is any misspelling)

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2023.05.28 20:32 JesulyGR17 My life is completely empty

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2023.05.28 20:31 JesulyGR17 My life is completely empty

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2023.05.28 20:29 puppyworm My story as a recovering neet

Copied directly from NEET as I thought this might be a good place to post my journey as well!
Edit: I just realized due to a comment I received on this post that many people will assume I'm a woman. I'm simply a gay man lol. Just wanted to clear that up.
Hey. I don't really have anyone to share this with, so I hope it's okay if I share it here. I'm a recovering neet and I just want to put this out there. Maybe it can serve as some inspiration for others looking to get out of neetdom or something. Anyways.
I would've dropped out of high school if I had gone to a regular one. Thankfully I ended up going to an alternative school because my mental health was so poor, and they supported me really well.
After I graduated I got a retail job and it sucked to hell. Quit after a couple months. Fall was coming up so I decided to go to community college. Did that for a year as my mental health was once again rapidly declining, and then I just... Stopped attending.
I did nothing until I was 23. It was great at first. Thankfully my dad is very soft in the heart and while he would verbally worry about me, he also probably would have let me live with him doing nothing for the rest of my life. I loved playing video games all day and sleeping into the evening.
But as time went on, it started kind of sucking. I had no money, I stopped getting enjoyment out of doing anything other than playing games, my social anxiety got 500% worse, I gained a lot of weight, and worst of all, my relationship with my boyfriend was deteriorating.
I was in therapy for a bit, but she had to drop me due to her clinic no longer accepting my dad's insurance. My boyfriend, who lived with me and my dad, was kind and patient, but I could tell his patience and hope for me was wearing thin after a few years of me doing absolutely nothing to help myself.
At the end of 2021 (I think), I got on some meds that actually work pretty well for my anxiety. I also tried shrooms a few times, which made me realize a some things.
Firstly, that my greatest wish of moving out wasn't going to happen if I didn't do anything to make it happen. We wouldn't be able to live off my boyfriend's salary alone. Also, I wouldn't want him to have to work that much.
Second, that was what led me to the realization that my lack of drive was putting some strain on our relationship. Of course, he doesn't think not having a job is a bad thing, as evidenced by the fact that he stayed with me all throughout my ~4-5 years of neetdom. It's more about how he would have to work so much to sustain us if we ever wanted to leave.
And third, I... Wanted to do more than survive. I wanted to be able to afford to do things like take trips and eat sushi and live in a decent place. I'm a big Disney parks fan since I grew up with my parents taking me all the time, so I want to be able to keep going even into my adulthood. I know that sounds stupid to a lot of people, but it's important to me and part of what motivates me (I'm just autistic lmao don't worry I loathe Disney as a company)
During the summer of 2022, I decided (to the delight of my dad and boyfriend) that I would go back to community college. I signed up for one math class to ease myself back in.
To my surprise, it wasn't as bad as I remembered. The people around me were younger than me, but I'm still pretty young still and am often mistaken for a teenager, so that wasn't a problem for me. I didn't really socialize. The atmosphere of my college was too high school-like for me to feel comfortable socializing.
But the class itself was... Lowkey kinda fun? I realized that I actually enjoy learning math. And that was when, after also researching anxiety-friendly well paying jobs, I decided I would transfer to a university, where I would major in computer science and get a job programming or something like that.
I took another class in the winter, applied to the university as a transfer, and after some hassle, I'm incredibly happy to say that at 24 years old, I'm starting at the university this fall! My then boyfriend, now fiance and I decided we want to get married, AND we're moving out of my dad's house since the school is across the state. My tuition is being funded by grants and the housing is being funded by my wonderful, generous fiance, and we'll be moving out in less than a month!!
One of the weirdest things I've realized is that I was so, SO bored when I was neeting. Having things to do in the real world, goals to attain, actually made me feel like a real person. Like I wanted to go out into the world and like, do something. I also feel like I can enjoy video games and stuff a lot more now.
I'll always be supportive of neets, those who are neet by choice and those who aren't, and I'll never judge anyone for being one. But that life isn't for me anymore. I'm happy to have my tax dollars go to a neet who needs it more, and once I'm working, I want to let my fiance decide what he wants to do. If he wants to play vidya all day, that's fine, the goal is to make enough money for him to be able to do that. And if he wants to pursue college or something, I'll be able to support him financially.
Him and my dad are literally the only people in my life right now. My social anxiety got so bad as a need that I ended up cutting everyone off. I hope trying to make new friends ends up being worth it. And in college, I'll be sure to take on less of a workload/take breaks if I need to. I don't want to go back to the way things were.
Anyways, I know this is long as shit, and I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read it. Let me know your thoughts, questions, etc if you have any. Much love and wishing the best for everyone.
(Also just want to add that I realize how lucky I've been here. I'm by no means trying to say it's easy to stop being a neet, or that you should even have to at all. In a world where machines could do much of the work, there's no reason to force people to work if they don't want to or can't. I'm antiwork. My happiness lies not with becoming a wagecuck, but in being able to support my partner and be able to do things like move out and afford to go on vacation. Everyone finds their own happiness in life. If your happiness is being a neet, more power to you!)

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2023.05.28 20:23 rubyruined Review The Ruin of Kings by Jenn Lyons (A Chorus of Dragons, #1)

I write book reviews on Half Past Midnight, a blog dedicated to the surreal world of fantasy and science fiction.
As a reader who dislikes waiting for stories to be completed, I decided to pick up Jenn Lyons' A Chorus of Dragons when the last part of the series was published. I prefer my book series long, sprawlingly ambitious, and complete. For me, the first book in the series, The Ruin of Kings - ticked off all these boxes, and a lot more.

Plot

The first of a series of five huge books (each clocking in about six hundred pages), The Ruin of Kings is a hot, glorious mess. Set in the fictional empire of Quur, the story takes place in a world rife with politics and magic, with plenty of plotting and backstabbing to top it off. This book is divided into parts and starts with a conversation between the main character, Kihrin, and his jailor, a creature named Talon.
Although it's not clear why Talon is holding him captive, she soon forces her prisoner to recount his story for her so she can record it. In between, she interjects with her own narration of his life (due to reasons I do not want to spoil for you.) Kihrin starts from a point in his life where he was sold into slavery and eventually came into Talon's grasp. On the other hand, Talon prefers to go back further in time, right back to Kihrin's childhood, where everything started. The narration alternates between the two for a major part of the book.
Kihrin's past is rife with murky secrets and shady dealings... which eventually led him into trouble when he was at the wrong place at the wrong time. After discovering his real identity, he soon becomes embroiled in a web of political intrigue and deception which reaches far back into the annals of history.
Quur is a dangerous place to live in. There are demons roaming on the streets, monsters lurking in the seas, and cruel dragons holding prisoners of their own. But worse than these are the monsters that are human. Evil takes many forms in this story, and not all of them are unpleasant to look at.

Except real evil isn’t a demon or a rogue wizard. Real evil is an empire like Quur, a society that feeds on its poor and its oppressed like a mother eating her own children. Demons and monsters are obvious; we’ll always band together to fight them off. But real evil, insidious evil, is what lets us just walk away from another person’s pain and say, well, that’s none of my business.

Kihrin soon discovers that he is now a pawn in a game much larger than himself - a game that is tied to the very fate of the world. This world has a bloody history filled with ancient prophecies about mortals, immortals, demons, and witches, all of which are interpreted by different factions and religions in their own ways.
The Ruin of Kings was very hard for me to get into at first. There were just so many different families, creatures, gods, and prophecies that it took a while to finally understand what the characters were even referring to. To top that, there are characters who have similar names, who have lived multiple lives in different people's bodies. That means you can never really be sure who you are talking to. All of this, coupled with extremely tangled family trees, the complex narration jumping to and fro in time, and a general feeling of what-the-hell-is-happening, made it really hard to figure out what was going on in the first few chapters. Honestly, you just have to bear with those chapters to get through to the part where it gets good. Don't make the same mistake as me: use the glossary at the back. Take notes if you have to. This book rewards careful reading, but you'll have to put in the effort.
About a third into the book, I finally reached the point where I could not put it down. Once it finds its rhythm, it becomes a page-turner not afraid to subvert tropes. There are several moments where the story takes turns you just didn't see coming. This results in a delicious experience that takes its time to develop into an epic conflict.

Characters

Kihrin meets a host of fascinating characters throughout the story - a sea witch with a bad temper, a demon with a flair for colorful vocabulary, and goddesses who like to move mortals around like pawns in a game of chess. Everybody wants something - and they are often different things. The various characters have their own agendas to fulfill and motivations to fuel them, lingering between various shades of black and white. Lyons does an excellent job of making these characters feel real to get us invested in their stories and relationships.

Kihrin

Kihrin is an extremely flawed protagonist who struggles with his own identity and the weight of his destiny. He struggles to do the right thing while balancing the darker streak in him. At the same time, he's also witty and clever enough to think on his feet, making for a complex character that has you rooting for him despite all the mistakes he makes.

“I don’t want to be a pawn,” I said.
“Good. This is a war, not chess.”

Worldbuilding

The world-building in this book is very detailed and intricate. The world is vast and has multiple kingdoms and religions, all with their own cultures and beliefs. Although we only visit a few of them at the moment, I have a feeling we'll see a lot more of them in the future. Plus, the magic system has clear and well-defined rules, often intertwining with politics in strange and unexpected ways. Coupled with a host of gods, demons, wizards and dragons, it makes for lore that is rich and fun to sink your teeth into.

“Sooner or later, everything falls: waves, empires, races, even gods.”

Clearly, a lot of time was spent on creating the mythology of Quur and it shows. However, it does tend to be a little messy and overwhelming at times. A lot of the names are too similar and there were chapters where I found myself going back to a previous part to look up information and connect the dots.

Writing Style

For me, the writing style was the weakest part of this book. Although the prose is engaging and the dialogue is witty, the way it is presented make it hard to get into initially. There were multiple info dumps in places, and the constant flow of new information feels overwhelming at times. With way too many plot threads, the shifting timelines, convoluted history, and magic dynamics make it harder to keep track of the story. It does have a payoff but requires a lot of effort on the reader's part initially.
There were too many points where I thought of giving up. I wish that the story had followed a linear or a simpler narrative format to draw readers in, at least for the first part - when they are still deciding whether to continue with the rest of the series.

In Conclusion

Ultimately, The Ruin of Kings is a story about the blurred lines between black and white, about destiny and identity. It weaves together an impressive conclusion enriched by its detailed world-building, grey characters, and solid magic system. This is something that would make an excellent reread once you know how it ends - there are so many nuanced details that are very easy to miss on a first read.
For all its strengths, the story still has its issues, marred by the narrative structure and expository style, which seems too overwhelming to properly enjoy for the first half. However, continuing with it is a rewarding experience. This story will delight fans of G.R.R.M, Robert Jordan, and Brandon Sanderson, who like their tales epically ambitious and filled with adventure and danger.
Although it took quite a while to read this huge book, I kept thinking about it long after turning the last page. I thought I would need a bit of a break with a shorter story before starting the next book, but I couldn’t follow through on that and started the next part the very same day :)

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2023.05.28 20:23 ishouldvoicemario AITA for abandoning my girlfriend’s poorly planned date night?

My girlfriend (26f) and I (29m) have been together for 2.5 years and live together. We have recently started doing regular date nights, alternating who makes the plans. Most of the time we leave it as a surprise for each other, but sometimes we will run it by each other.
Last week, my girlfriend asked me if I had plans for Saturday. I didn’t, so she told me that she was going to plan a date night for us. I was excited. On Friday she asked me if I wanted a chill date, or if I wanted to go out and do something. I chose a chill date since we both had a busy week.
Saturday comes and she’s off work at 4, home by 5. She immediately crashes on the couch and tells me that she is going to have a nap. She says “I’m thinking tonight we go for a walk and make that beef dish.” I said that sounds fine to me, then she passed out on the couch.
I was disappointed here, because in all honesty, going for a walk and making that beef dish is what we do most nights. It’s our favourite dish we make and we eat it maybe 3, sometimes 4 days a week. And we go on walks at least twice a week. It felt like there was very little effort put into planning a nice date. I think this upsets me so much because I tend to spoil my girlfriend on our dates. I take her to shows and fun restaurants, pay for everything, and try to keep it fun and exciting. If we’re home I’ll find a new recipe for us to make together, or create a drinking game to our favourite shows. Anything really. I don’t feel like my girlfriend puts in enough effort with dates, even low key ones. She is in a better place than me financially and yet she rarely spends on me. She often seems to make date plans that are going to avoid spending on me actually. All of this makes me feel unimportant and not very special at times.
When she passed out, I waited for probably 30 minutes, then I decided to go to the driving range. I spent an hour there before she texted me to let me know she was awake. I came home and I think she could tell I was upset about something. She apologized for falling asleep and recognized she should have rescheduled the date if she was that tired. I appreciated that apology, but I was still really upset about the bigger picture. She asked if I wanted to go get the groceries with her, I was in a pretty down mood. I told her I was kind of over the night altogether at that point, so she went by herself, came home and made dinner. I didn’t eat as I wasn’t hungry and I read my book while she watched TV, then I went to bed and she stayed up.
I feel bad for feeling bad, if that makes sense. I’m disappointed in my girlfriend and how flippant she is with date planning. I feel like an asshole for expecting more from her.

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2023.05.28 20:22 Capital-Elephant-200 How do I ask out one of my teammates?

I'm in college (20M) and I'm on the school triathlon team. I've been talking to a girl 19F who is on the team as well. I've known her for about a year and I like her. She asked me to her sorority date event (she called it her "sorority event" when she asked me) at a bowling alley which didn't go all that well. The environment/situation was a little bit awkward. A few days later I asked her if she wanted to hangout just the two of us, so we went for a two hour walk and talked which went moderately well; she seemed a bit guarded/standoffish but we had plenty of good conversation and there were defiantly moments where things were going well.
I didn't really know what to make of that hangout/date and I didn't want to make the dynamic on the team weird or awkward if I played the situation wrong. So I just didn't talk to her about it/bring it up again (basically ghosted her) (facepalm).
I really couldn't read her. I couldn't tell if she liked me or was just waiting until she had an excuse to leave. I could feel the rift in our friendship at practice over the next few weeks. We had a race and we avoided each other, the few times we interacted, it felt very clinical/utilitarian (no joking or anything like normal). Then 3-4 weeks after that race and with one of our bigger races and national championship coming up where we travel 15+ hours together and spend a few days together we got back to having fun/joking interactions with a little light flirting. During the championship race where we (the whole team of 20ish people) spent a few days together out of state, she seemed to have opened back up, she tried watching a movie with me and didn't have any issues joking around with me/talking to me. When we got back to the city where we go to school around midnight we got a ride from a friend back to where we live. Her and I sat in the back seat together and it just felt a bit awkward. After the championship we kept having good/somewhat flirty interactions (end of year party, practices, other social events). I had her bike pump, so when I was moving out of my place, I dropped it off at her place and I really wanted to talk to her about everything before she went to her hometown for the summer, but I wimped out. A few weeks into not seeing her over this summer (3-4 weeks), I texted her to ask how her summer was going and we've been talking (texting) everyday for the last week. A few other things:
1) She comes from money (sorority girl, drives a jeep, the whole nine yards), I'm the son of a carpenter and corporate recruter, both my parents went to college. The only reason I'm in school is because I got a scholarship (my family isn't poor by any means $100-200K/year two income family in a bigger city where that money doesn't go super far, but we have a house and two cars). I always though my family was very well off (which I still think we are, I'm incredibly grateful for the opportunities I have) I've spent the last few years of my life working on an ambulance and the last eight years building houses with my dad (homeschooled and worked full-time) which has given me a real view into how lucky I am. But to be honest, her family's money intimidates me a bit; she's pretty well adjusted for the kid of a hedge fund manager (or some kind of finance job). But the whole sorority thing scares me a bit, when I went to the date event, I didn't really know how to fit in or talk to the other guys there; they were talking about their houses, the private schools they went to and their fancy vacations. A whole nother level of rich I didn't know existed, apart from the redneck rich construction company owners that I knew, I never really knew or interacted with many people who's family had real money (worth 10 or 20 million or more). But when I went to this sorority event you couldn't swing a dead cat without hitting 5 BMW driving, private school kids. That environment just seems fake to me, and I can tell that she acted different/more reserved around her sorority friends.
2) When she's around her sorority friends, she's so proper, she doesn't talk as much, and she's more reserved. She seems like she's trying to fit in with them more instead of being herself. Same thing when we went on that walk, she seemed shy and more reserved than when we're together with the team. I get that it's a comfort thing; she's more comfortable around the team, so she's more relaxed and feels like she can be herself. I like her when she's who she is, so it makes me sad when she hides that.
3) She's never been in a relationship. That's totally ok with me and I can relate, I didn't start dating until the end of my senior year. She hasn't ever had a boyfriend, or had sex or really done much other than kiss a guy. Again, thats totally ok with me, but its a bit intimidating. I care about her, I don't want to go to kiss her if thats a really big step for her. Or, I don't want to touch her at the wrong time when she's not comfortable with it. I've had sex, kissed women, all that, and I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable. When we rode in the ride share together to the bowling alley, all the other guys sat next to their date and I left a seat between us (which I sort of regret), I didn't know if she meant for it to be a date or if she was just asking me as a friend so I left some space which later on seemed like a mistake. I just don't want to be creepy or make her fell uncomfortable. How do I approach this situation? I like her, and I want to ask her out again/talk to her more, but she's out of town until school starts back in mid August. Do I just keep texting her until we get closer to school starting or would it be good to talk to her about how I feel more immediately? I don't want her to loose interest if I'm just texting her everyday for three months without it going anywhere. I don't really know what to make of the situation.

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2023.05.28 20:20 EzekialX Vulturebeard: Bad Roomies Part 2

Part 1: https://www.reddit.com/ReddXReads/comments/13lfqkw/vulturebeard_the_legbeard_that_ruined_roomies_fo
Hi everyone, bunny here. I’m having Ezekial post this for me because while I lurk on reddit, I’m on too many online communities and burn out quickly on all of them. I’m just here to tell this incredibly long tale. Pull up a chair, grab a snack, get comfy. This is a long ride.
The Cast List
Bunny (author): 33, female, a year or so out of a divorce that turned toxic and abusive and ultimately helped me realize I was gay. Recovering lifelong doormat slowly building a spine. Neuro spicy gym rat with major depressive disorder, general anxiety disorder, and most recently diagnosed with ADHD. Unfortunately very familiar with surviving trauma.
Z (poster): My partner. 31, nonbinary (they/them), also neuro spicy with depression, anxiety, OCD, BPD, autism, and also familiar with lifelong trauma.
One Liner Beard (OLB): 33, male, neuro spicy with ADHD and depression. He also suspects autism but isn’t pursuing a diagnosis. His nickname here comes from the fact that in messenger, he usually has one-word replies like “oof” or “mmm” as an acknowledgement he had seen the message but has nothing further to contribute.
VultureBeard (Vulture): 30, female, neuro spicy and disabled with multiple conditions. She has Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, POTs (postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome), autism, depression, anxiety, chronic migraines, but also possibly a list of things that may or may not be real – that will all be explained. The star of this unfortunate circus. Her name will be explained in this part.
Kid: 3. Female. OLB and Vulture’s child. Likely neuro spicy like we all are, but she’s also only 3 years old. Slightly speech delayed and not potty trained yet.
Minor mentions:
Shit ass ex-husband (SA): name is self-explanatory. 32, male. Divorce was amicable to keep the peace. I immediately went no contact with him after.
J2: Friend of OLBs.
You ready? Deep breath. Now let’s dive into this mess.

Chapter Two: VultureBeard, or the Walking Diagnosis
With the backstory of how we wound up with a neckbeard, a legbeard, and their kid out of the way, I’ll start on VultureBeard properly now.
J2 was the one who introduced her to OLB. He ran into her at a local convention, and they talked and spent the day together. He ended up sleeping over at her house, on her couch, since she lived a few minutes away from the convention center, and he introduced her to his D&D group that OLB was a DM for. He said that at first, he wanted to smash just based on looks (before she stopped caring for herself, before the pregnancy), until she opened her mouth.
Oh boy.
I met her on Halloween 2018 or 2019 (trauma made my memory absolute garbage, ain’t it fun?), when OLB wanted to run a one-shot Curse of Strahd campaign for our D&D group. J2’s group was called Party A, we were Party B. Both of our campaigns existed in the same universe that OLB created. It was a fun one shot. I liked her. We integrated her into our D&D campaign as a side character who joined our party.
With her autism, she talks a lot, and can have a conversation with anyone, but she does naturally miss a lot of social cues. She says it’s okay to be direct with her and say things like, “I can’t talk right now, I’m busy.” But in the wild, she just enjoys people. That in itself isn’t a bad thing.
When we met, she was a Mormon with long brown hair, glasses, and modest clothes with long ankle-length jean skirts. I don’t know if that was a lifelong practice or just the people she had associated with. She didn’t curse at all, and still substitutes “fudge” for my favorite and most often-used curse word. Over time, she dropped religion, but she only curses in text, and very rarely at that, like when she’s pushed to her mental limit. She still dresses in a lot of the modest clothes from before, but it’s mostly because she doesn’t go clothes shopping a lot. I have passed down some clothes I have shrunk out of to her.
Her fashion sense is a bit of Walmart-meets-Goodwill. The tired mom “this is clean, so I’ll wear it” kind of aesthetic. She’s big on thrifting, but so am I. Most of my wardrobe is thrifted or passed on from a few gym friends these days, so it’s not like I’m poking fun at secondhand clothes. It’s just that there’s a lack of style or effort on her part, like she just puts clothes on and sometimes remembers to brush her hair out. I think there’s a part of her that doesn’t recognize she’s plus sized after pregnancy because she once bought clothes that are size medium, and they didn’t fit. She fit my old 2X leggings. I traded her leggings once, my bigger size for her smaller size.
She and OLB don’t fold laundry or put it away, so she will have laundry stuffed in their hamper that they keep in our shoe closet next to the laundry room, or boxes on her desk, or on her desk chair. They kind of live out of that clothes pile. If she needs to dress in something nice, it likely is wrinkly because it was in an unfolded pile.
The first run-in with realizing that something was a little “off” with her was when she tried cooking for us. We had other friends over to play D&D and Magic with us, and she wanted to cook some kind of chicken and noodle dish. With her POTs (post orthostatic tachycardia syndrome), she’s usually sodium deficient so she adds way too much salt to whatever she’s eating. Not being used to cooking for others, she served us completely inedible chicken that was too salty.
One of my former friends was there for that debacle. What she also noticed was that Kid seemed to be behind some childhood markers. At 2, Kid was still using a bottle and didn’t seem to talk much. She was worried that Kid would keep falling behind. It was a red flag that got tucked away. At the time, I was still thinking of Vulture as a burned-out first-time neuro spicy mom. That’s a lot for a disabled woman to handle. As a disabled person myself, I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt. I gave her too much benefit of the doubt for way too long.
Vulture as a person focuses very much on herself. Because of the body aches and pains that come with both Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome and POTs, yes, I understand that her body regularly fights itself. But why is it that every time her body expressed pain, she had to do a loud, “AH, OW” or other pain noises as loud as she could? Or she will complain about whatever is giving her trouble. Some days she will be using her computer quietly, then when I come out of my bedroom, she starts to complain about her daily aches and pains. This happens pretty much every day, for different reasons. Her sneezes are likewise as loud, to where I can hear her across the house, through a closed door and over the show Z and I are watching.
Most awkward is Vulture’s bathroom habits. In Apartment #2, I guess Vulture got used to using the bathroom with the door cracked because they lived in a house without roommates, and she needed to keep an ear on Kid. Even now in a shared space, she keeps the door cracked, sometimes with the light off so I don’t think anyone is in the bathroom because it’s more migraine friendly.
Until I hear the grunting.
THE GRUNTING.
THE POOP GRUNTING.
I have heard it through my closed bedroom door, because her bathroom is right next to my bedroom. Usually, it’s when my bedroom is quieter, like when Z and I are off to sleep. But I hear her grunting as she’s using the bathroom, either because the door is open, or she is just that loud. I’m terrified to know which one it is.
Her hygiene is questionable at best. I know personally that Depression™ makes hygiene and self-care extremely difficult. I myself do the best I can, especially while being constantly sweaty at the gym and a Big Sad (depression) fighter. So, I get mental illness and hygiene. With Vulture and her long hair, she would leave it in a bun for days until it matted. She asked for my help with detangling it and it took me around two hours to safely work the mats and tangles out. When she cut it in a homemade attempt to do the popular wolf cut on Tik Tok, it was much more manageable. When it’s shorter, it has tight curls. She constantly has a natural body odor smell to her. I think with her sensitive skin, she has to wear a specific unscented deodorant, but I don’t think she applies it unless she’s leaving the house. The sink in her and OLB’s bathroom is used as mostly a storage space with things piled on top of it, so I don’t think it’s used for much. The bathtub needs a deep scrubbing, and she gives Kid a bath more than she herself showers.
Having heard the poop grunting, I’m afraid to look at their toilet.
In general, Vulture isn’t active, but to say that she’s sedentary is a vast understatement. The average sedentary person looks like an Olympic athlete next to her. She occupies two spots in the house: Her bed, or the couch in the living room. For most of the day. She will just have her laptop either on the table next to her or in her lap, and that’s where she spends most of the day, gaming.
With me being a gym rat, I am incredibly proud of how I went from a couch potato to a weightlifter. When I think about what would happen if I suddenly dropped to her levels of activity, I know my body would fall apart. I often wonder if her lying in bed or on the couch contributes to more of her body pains because her muscles are deteriorating from disuse. I mean what do I know, I’m not a doctor. That body pain cycles to her being even more inactive because she hurts. It’s a big cycle of negativity.
When the weather changes drastically, she will be hit with migraines or allergy attacks, to where she has to lay down all day as well. She takes OTC pain medicine frequently, as well as allergy meds. One of her desk cabinets is a well-stocked mini pharmacy of OTC medication and some prescription medication she has collected over time that expired over a year ago. When I’m hit with a rare migraine, I know she will have something in stock for it.
Her doctor says she needs to eat more frequently because she’s always shaky. She will hold up her hand to show me how much it’s shaking, and it always looks as though she’s making it shake from the wrist, instead of it being an actual hand movement. She always tells me, “Look at this,” and holds up her shaking hand, like she’s trying to show me how bad she’s doing, but it’s for different reasons every time. She didn’t eat, she’s too tired, she has a migraine, she has sinus pain – everything gives her shaky hands, which I joked about once.
If she has a new symptom, she goes to Doctor Google to look up what’s wrong with her, and then talk in our house chat on discord that she thinks she might have “so and so” wrong with her because the symptoms match. Or she will post screenshots of whatever her symptoms are. As far as I know in the time living with her, she’s never had close medical calls or anything that needed further treatment, except for a heart study where she wore a device to monitor her heart rate. Doctor Google gave her all sorts of things she could have, though.
Within the time I started writing this saga, I had this encounter with her in the house group chat on discord that she, OLB, and I are in, about how she thinks she’s allergic to mosquito bites because the bites swelled up and got inflamed:
Vulture: Just figured out something I’m most likely allergic to: mosquito’s saliva reaction is increased inflammation around the bite site and the condition is skeeter syndrome.
Me: You should get that confirmed by a doctor. It’s mosquito season.
(it sounds like she copy/pasted that bit about mosquito’s saliva from Google)
Mind you, my former in-laws thought I was allergic to mosquito bites because the same thing happened to me. My mosquito bites swelled up beyond what they should look like, and mosquitos have a good nose at finding me in particular compared to other people. I tried to empathize with her, even though it just seemed like she wanted to identify with a syndrome she found on the internet.
She said that she had the same symptoms her friend’s dad had for GERD because her acid reflux was acting up. The GERD saga is a fun one as well, which I’ll fully share later.
Funny enough, if I also have something similar to what her current issue is, she doesn’t play Oppression Olympics and say hers is worse. I’ve been dealing with vertigo on and off for the past month and I don’t have the ability to see a doctor for it at the moment. So, when she says that she’s dizzy or the room is spinning, I express empathy or at least a little “oh, same here,” because I have to carefully move my body in ways that don’t make the room spin. It might be her autism, it might be because she doesn’t care, but she never expresses empathy my way. She just moves on.
I’ve told her multiple times she needs to see a doctor to check for each new symptom she has, but somehow there’s an excuse. The latest I’ve heard is, “I will once my phone is turned back on. It hasn’t been paid in a while.” Valid yes, but then please get off Google. Because she’s on government assistance and doesn’t have a car and doesn’t know how to drive, she’s ferried to her appointments by a medical bus that stops at the house. They do need to be able to call her. Just please get off Google in the meantime! I’ve even told her that Doctor Google and WebMD will say everything is cancer or fatal and it’s not good for you, and she just kind of brushed it off.
One of my friends calls her the Professional Victim. Z is convinced she has Factitious Disorder (formerly called Munchausen’s). She loves to hide behind her illnesses as to why she can’t get out of bed or can’t do chores. If you were to listen to her every day, you’d think she was falling apart at the seams because it was always something. Migraine, body pain, allergies, sinus problems or sinus infections, stomach problems, dizziness, shakiness. Repeat. Forever.
She will ask me if her forehead feels hot, and when I can’t tell, she checks with a thermometer. She says, “My natural body temperature is low so 99 degrees is a fever to me.”
This is also where I gave her a lot of benefit of the doubt at the beginning, because EDS and POTs will affect the entire body in different ways. One of my friends, in her casual dark humor, will have conversations with me about how she’s just not going to be able to walk properly that day, because her ankle joint slid out of place, but she still finished her work shift. I talk to my friend regularly about her struggles with her body, but somehow it doesn’t have the same self-pity that Vulture’s does. Every disability presents differently between people. As rare as EDS and POTs is, it’s pretty common in online communities because it’s where people tend to flock to. In my time in varying disabled online communities, I’ve never seen someone who complains or fishes for attention as much as Vulture does.
If she’s having a relatively good day, she will either be gaming, or maybe she will get to one of the chores that OLB tries to get her to do during the day, like doing the dishes or cleaning Kid’s room. When OLB had prescription Adderall (before the shortage made him switch to a different ADHD med), she took one of his pills and was zooming around actually being productive. She has symptoms of ADHD but doesn’t have a formal diagnosis, so OLB thought it might help her. It seemed to.
If she has a bad day, which is most of her days, she stays rooted on the couch or moves between her couch and her bed, moving her laptop with her. She spends all day building in Minecraft, completing her Pokedex, or playing other games.
Sometimes when I come out of my room to cook, she says something along the lines of, “I planned on cleaning today,” followed by vague hand gestures of how she’s feeling. I never asked her about her daily plans, but she needed to tell me. Is it self-awareness or guilt?
If she’s doing a load of dishes, she will loudly proclaim that she’s dizzy and shaky and in pain and have to go sit down after 10 minutes of that. I don’t know if she actually has the body strength to stay upright for longer than ten minutes at a time, and I don’t know if that’s her actual chronic illnesses, or the fact that she doesn’t do anything at all.
I’ve given her the same advice I use myself for low spoon (low energy) days when I need to get things done. I’ve told her it’s okay to take ten-minute breaks and then get started again. Or an hour break, if her body is giving her trouble. I’ve told her it’s okay to clean the house while sitting on the ground or in a chair, if that’s easier on her body. In managing my broken mental health, I’ve taught myself all sorts of life hacks, or as I call them, “brain hacks,” to work around how gross depression makes me feel. And I’ve told her that if it’s a really bad day, the dishes aren’t going anywhere and can wait until tomorrow.
That’s meant to be compassionate, not taken in the “if you give an inch, they’ll take a mile” sort of way, but it must be interpreted as permission to not do The Thing. It just won’t get done if she feels she has permission to skip over it.
If she does anything, she will want metaphorical ass pats for her good work. OLB jokes that it’s a praise kink, but some days it really seems that way without anyone consenting to participate in her kink. She asks if I noticed she cleaned the kitchen or did some kind of cleaning and if I’m proud of her. I used to play along with the praise because I wanted to give her positive reinforcement, like maybe if I emphasized that it was a good thing, she’d be more encouraged to do it more. I’ve got jokes, apparently. Optimism was so strong early in the friendship.
If she cooks, usually it’s something frozen that she can heat up like pizza. Most of the time, she exists on boxed macaroni and cheese or sandwiches. Or what fast food OLB brings home. Most of her diet is processed, instant, or frozen. Or she eats odds and ends like what cereal and junk food is brought home from the food bank or when OLB goes shopping.
Since SA left the house, I took up cooking for myself and exploring what I like to cook, as SA was the main cook for the house. My gym regimen helped me meal prep and confront a lot of my bad eating habits, so I started prepping healthier foods. I am the stereotypical lifter that eats a lot of chicken, rice, and vegetables. Z also likes to cook, and it became a way for us to bond by cooking together or one of us watching the other cook and just vibe in each other’s company.
VultureBeard gets her name because, one, she is a legbeard. But two, every time I made something early on with her living with us, she always said something along the lines of, “Ooh, that smells so good! It’s making me hungry!”
Me, in my doormat stage, took the cue that she dangled and offered her some of my food. Back then, I always tried to cook enough for the whole house. It became a pattern. If I cooked something, she always popped up, hungry and unable to make actual food for herself or somehow her illnesses were acting up and preventing her from cooking for herself. If I said I was popping over to the store, sometimes she would ask if I could pick up a soda for her and occasionally, she would be able to pay me, always in loose change because her disability payments went right to the bills that she and OLB had. I always took the bait because yeah, doormats will doormat and vultures will vulture.
She does reciprocate in small ways, sharing some occasional treats with me or saying I can have some of her mac n cheese or Oreo cookies or French fries or whatever food she has some days. But for the most point, a lot of her behavior feels like fishing – fishing for attention, for food, for confirmations of her medical issues.
Her general attitude towards housework also contributes to her main other issue that makes me want to scream. She hoards. Empty salsa jars, Nesquik containers, pizza boxes, mac n cheese boxes. She holds onto things that Z and I see as garbage, because she has dozens of DIY projects in mind. She would be the person that followed 5 Minute Crafts for useful projects. To her credit, she did make a nifty sock organizer out of spare cardboard. But she has dozens of empty frozen pizza boxes and macaroni boxes piled up on her desk and ideas in her head, but no actual execution of them. I have pictures on my phone of her desk hoard, and while the desk itself is tall, the pile on the topmost part of the desk reaches the ceiling. That’s at least two feet of buildup.
It drives Z batty. With their OCD, Z can’t stand seeing the general mess in the house, but her desk makes them want to throw things. There was an empty Pizza Hut box that spent a week on the floor under the table in the living room before she finally picked it up and moved it to her desk. She scolded my cat for jumping on it.
Vulture: I want to save it for a project, I just don’t know what I want to use it for yet.
Me: Why not just throw it away? Isn’t it garbage?
She only gave a vague shrug, and the pizza box stayed on her desk for another few days until while cleaning the kitchen, Z got tired of looking at it and finally took it out to the outside garbage bin.
This is a constant pattern for her. She hoards things that she sees as something that could be useful in the future, but in the meantime it all stacks up and takes up space. She and OLB both are pack rats, which I think enables it further. OLB said that she also hoards food when she thinks there’s a food shortage in the house, but that also includes things that shouldn’t be eaten or are close to being spoiled. She freezes produce and even bread dough she made because she would start projects and then not have the energy to finish them or deal with them properly. I think if Z and I weren’t in the house, it would just be a rat’s nest of garbage.
That was why Z and I took on the majority of housework. We have a current setup to deep clean the common areas of the house monthly, and anything she doesn’t pick up that we read as trash will get thrown out. It’s barely making a change in the house, but it’s better for our mental health. It’s unfortunate that the house barely stays clean for two days after we clean it.
OLB usually has an excuse for not contributing towards the housework. His ADHD makes him forgetful, plus he hates dishes and purposefully avoids them until he knows he has to deal with it. He’s mostly just exhausted from work. With Vulture? Ten thousand excuses.
With OLB working an exhausting but consistent tech repair job, that leaves Vulture in charge of Kid during the day. If she exists entirely in her bed and the couch, how is she able to keep up with a toddler?
Oh, that’s going to be a huge tale on its own. Fuckle the buck up. We’ve got a long way to go. And yes, it will make you angry.

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2023.05.28 20:16 adenomuch Transitioning baby to own room

I have an 8 month old who has been in my bed since he was 2 months old (he was in a bassinet before, but I had to be out of town for a month and our accommodations were limited so he got used to sleeping with me). It worked out relatively well in that I get an okay amount of sleep with a couple wake ups a night.
I was going to sleep train after we moved into our new apartment (we previously had a 1 bedroom, now baby has his own room), and he was able to fall asleep with a pacifier as long as I stayed next to him.
One day a couple weeks before the move he decided he absolutely hates the pacifier and will only nurse to sleep 🫠 occasionally my husband can get him to sleep with gentle rocking and pats.
I would like to put him in his own room in a crib because now he can army crawl and he kicks us really hard when we wake up. Also he wants to be on his tummy and nurse to sleep which doesn’t always work so well.
My husband doesn’t want to sleep train (he feels it’s cruel) and I do enjoy the snuggles, but I miss having my own space in bed.
Has anyone gotten baby to sleep in their own crib but not sleep train? Is this possible or should I just bite the bullet and sleep train him?
My baby is very clingy and the minute I set him down and walk away he starts crying uncontrollably and hysterically so I’m worried that sleep training won’t work and I’ve put him through so much for nothing.
Right now, he nurses to sleep at night around 7.30-8pm, usually wakes up about 2-3 hours after and needs boob or dad to hold him to fall back asleep, then can usually get another 4 hour stretch on a good night. Wakes up around 7 am on most days.

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2023.05.28 20:16 Mortimer_Whimsiwick World Hunger Games: 17th Hunger Games: Day 2

With the first day gone, Artemis and Luther gave their analysis and previewed public polls. Mortimer had usurped Wolvthorne (7) as the favourite to win after his victory against the District 1 tributes as well as exercising his chemistry prowess. Surprisingly, Cat had risen up the ranks as well, being the third favourite to win. Luther remarked how if Mortimer wins the games, they would have the seventh consecutive Golden Victor on their hands. Artemis then said the same could be said about Cat if she does something spectacular with her therapy skills. Luther reminded everyone that they were two tributes away from the final round of bets.
The cameras checked on the progress of the tributes. Mortimer stepped away from the boiling water to gather more logs for his raft project while his allies slumbered. Andrei (2) and Wolvthorne (7) were resting back at the cornucopia after failing to find more tributes. What they didn’t know was that John (9) had managed to steal a water bottle and a knife from them while on patrol. Carnelia and Logan (11) both were still in the eastern sector while Horace (10) continued to stay out of sight. Wren (5) and Jassy (12) were struggling to sleep inside a hollowed out log yards away from the lake shore.
Cat and Pearl awoke to see Mortimer napping on a nearly completed raft. Cat correctly guessed he stayed up all night working on it. She asked Pearl why he was making it. Pearl explained his logic behind it and Cat agreed it made sense something valuable would be on the other side. Pearl woke Mortimer from his nap while Cat filled the water bottles and pulled out the sandwiches. Mortimer was annoyed with himself for dozing off, but Pearl assured him nothing had happened since the portraits of the fallen. She urged him to eat breakfast before resuming his raft project. He relented and the two joined Cat.
Cat out of the blue asked if he could sing like his mentor. Mortimer was caught off guard but shook his head. Pearl regaled how Gill would sometimes burst into spontaneous song when visiting The Brine. Cat said that from a therapist’s perspective, it’s good to have someone in the community keep spirits high. Mortimer asked if Phoebe was hers, to which Cat nodded. She said that if she wins, she will provide District 6 another high spirits person. She asked the two what they would do if they won. Pearl announced her intent to open her own restaurant and clean the Grotto Hole neighbourhood. Mortimer agreed that the place needed some “R&R”. The two girls stared at him. He realised he hadn’t answered Cat’s question and rolled his eyes. He admitted he would hopefully marry his girlfriend and get his father some medical treatment. Cat seemed confused by him saying hopefully, but he returned to his raft project before she could ask. Pearl told her, “I appreciate what you’ve been trying to do for him. Considering he’s the most likely of us to go home, he needs to be in a better headspace.” Cat smiled and patted her on the back. She went off to relieve herself with Pearl accompanying her.
The next two hours went without much incident. There was some entertainment in Wolvthorne (7)’s agitation of not finding more tributes, Andrei (2) complaining about the smell, and the D11 tributes munching on leeches. However, interest was peaking when the tracking system caught Wolvthorne and Andrei (2) unknowingly closing in on Cat and the D4 tributes. A moment of triumph came when Mortimer had completed his raft, which measured 6’x10’. Pearl asked how they knew it would float. Cat decided to test it by standing on it while Mortimer pushed it off the shore. He kept it from floating away using the sturdy rope. A big smile spread across Mortimer’s face when seeing it float. He pulled the raft back in and suggested they pack up and begin their journey.
The three began gathering their materials. Cat went to grab the last backpack when all of a sudden, she heard a splash of water. She looked up and spotted Andrei and Wolvthorne bursting through the brush. She dropped the backpack and blocked Andrei’s attack with her sword. She dodged his next attack but wasn’t aware of Wolvthorne circling around to kill her. He was stopped by Pearl, who threw a rock at his head. Wolvthorne looked up and spotted her and Mortimer at the edge of the lake. He raged at the sight of Mortimer and bolted towards them. Pearl jumped onto the raft and urged Mortimer and Cat to retreat. Mortimer realized she was right as he had left his trident on the raft. As for Cat, she turned to see Mortimer and Pearl push off the shore and escape Wolvthorne. Desperate to reach them in time, she spat in Andrei’s face and slashed his face with her sword. She dove into the water and swam towards the raft. Artemis guessed she was a strong swimmer as she managed to catch up to the raft. Pearl quickly pulled her up onto the raft. All the while Wolvthorne threatened Mortimer with a gruesome death, his language having to be censored by the Capital.
The trio slowly moved through the lake, relieved to be far away from danger. The first hour was silent as Cat was upset with nearly being left behind. Pearl sensed the tension and waited for the first person to speak up. Unfortunately, Mortimer was unperturbed and continued to watch the trees and the water’s surface. In the commentator’s booth, Artemis described the drama as juicy and wondered if they would turn on one another. Luther was on the fence as well, remembering how Mortimer left without hesitation. Eventually, Pearl broke the silence and said, “Will someone please start talking as I’m tired of hearing the dead air.” Cat said she’d be willing to talk if her partner apologized. The annoyed and oblivious Mortimer asked what he had to be sorry for. Cat reminded him that he didn’t try to help her fight Andrei and left her to die. He argued that there was no time, but Cat recalled how he stood there “like a passive waste” as she struggled against Andrei and Pearl hurled rocks at Wolvthorne. Mortimer took offence to that comment. The two began hurling insults at each other while Pearl stood watching. She tried interjecting but her voice was lost in the chaos. Strangely enough, Andrei and Wolvthorne could hear the pandemonium while running along the shoreline. Their interest caused them to miss John (9) sneaking past and hightailing it to the cornucopia. The fight ended when Cat accused Mortimer of plotting to kill her and he blurted out, “I only kept you around for Pearl. But when an opportunity presented itself, I took it. I refuse to get screwed over again.” Cat was surprised by the sudden revelation and her face morphed to one of shock and understanding.
Mortimer was frustrated by the whole ordeal and sarcastically said, “Well, now the cat’s out of the bag. You now know after all this, I still have issues. Are you happy?” As he said the last sentence, he thrust his arms in the air and accidentally sent Pearl plummeting into the water. The splash pushed the raft forward. Mortimer quickly anchored the raft to a tree and Cat asked if she was alright. Pearl gave them a thumbs up, reminding her that she could swim. Cat urged her to return to the raft. Suddenly, Mortimer was freaking out. He noticed that the chemistry kit was missing from the backpack. Pearl guessed it fell in the water and sank to the bottom. She volunteered to swim down and grab it. He objected to this idea and offered to go himself. But before he could dive in, he saw nothing but the ripples on the surface. Underwater cameras found Pearl navigating the cloudy water searching for the kit, which was fortunately sealed in a waterproof box. Leeches attached themselves to her arms and legs, but she continued to swim. On the surface, Mortimer began berating himself for what happened. Cat assured him it was an accident and that Pearl could take care of herself. Mortimer felt slight relief, commenting how she did set the breath holding record.
Suddenly, something floating in the distance caught his eye. From his perspective, it looked similar to a log. However, when he squinted and leaned closer, he could make out big green eyes. It was a ten foot alligator and it was swimming closer. Mortimer’s terror heightened when he spotted two more coming from behind it. Pearl found the kit and burst out of the water, surfacing a mere three metres away from the raft. When she disrupted the water’s surface tension, this signalled to the alligators of prey in the water and they darted towards her. Cat screamed for her to get out of the water. The confused and terrified Pearl turned to see the sudden danger and screamed. She tossed the kit onto the middle of the raft and swam desperately to Cat’s outstretched hand. Mortimer grabbed his trident and was ready to stab any gators that came near.
The first alligator reached the raft before her and was on course to bite her head clean off, but was quickly stabbed in the neck by Mortimer and pushed away before it could do anything. A split second before Pearl could grab Cat’s hand, the second gator latched its jaws onto her right foot and began to pull her under. Mortimer impulsively dove into the water with trident in hand. He stabbed it in the eye and pushed its jaws open to help Pearl escape. Seconds later, the third and final gator latched onto Pearl’s waist and wrenched her free from Mortimer’s grasp. Mortimer cursed to himself, the bubbles giving the Capital a brief comedic moment in the chaos. He swam up to the surface to catch his breath before diving back down to save his partner. It didn’t take long to find his partner still in the gator’s clutches. His fear for her safety heightened when the gator began rolling and twisting her body around like a ragdoll.
In the commentator’s booth, Luther explained to the audience that the gator was commencing a “death roll”, an effective technique they use to kill and dismember their prey. Mortimer quickened his pace and lined his shot up when suddenly, the gator’s tail slapped him across the face. The sharp tip of the tail cut across his right eye, emitting a small mist of blood into the green water. The unexpected attack blinded Mortimer and caused him to drop his trident. He covered his eye to see better and saw the gator still rolling Pearl. He swam towards them and wrapped his hands around the gator’s neck. He fastened his legs around the neck and jabbed both of his thumbs into its eyes. The rolling stopped but the gator didn’t let go of Pearl’s now limp body. Mortimer grabbed the snout and pulled back as hard as he could, only sending everyone deeper into the lake. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted his trident and abandoned the gator to grab it. The gator tried to swim away, but Mortimer was quicker and stabbed it in the back of the neck, paralysing it and causing it to drown five minutes later.
Unfortunately, a cannon sounded while he was away. Pearl’s body floated to the surface, a mass amount of red spreading around her lifeless body. Mortimer dragged her body towards the raft and received assistance from Cat. Cat checked her vitals as he dragged himself onto the raft, still covering his eye. Cat stared at him with teary eyes and shook her head, signifying Pearl’s death. Mortimer began to cry, mourning the loss of his partner. The tears irritated his injured eye, making the scene all the more devastating. It was reported that back in District 4’s town square, Pearl’s older sister Henrietta was arrested after assaulting a peacekeeper in anger after he mocked her death to his comrade.
Cat cut off a sleeve of her Lycra swim piece and created a makeshift rag. Mortimer rummaged through his chemistry kit, Luther calling it his “hat of tricks”, and grabbed some leftover algae in a vial. Cat insisted he let her do it, but Mortimer argued that he had to do it. Cat grabbed a leech from Mortimer’s leg and dropped it in. Mortimer then poured in the last of his hydrogen peroxide, placing it in a stopper before shaking the tube. He then stared at the tube as the contents became a black goo. When the process was completed, he ignited it, creating a flame with a sulphury smell. Cat realized his hands were shaking at this point and insisted she apply the goo to his eye. Mortimer relented and allowed her to do so. She told him he was lucky his eyeball was unaffected but had to use some of their water to wash the blood out.
During the process, the two ignored the two cannons that rang in the distance. They were revealed to be Wren (5) and Carnelia (11), both having fallen victim to the alligator mutts. The difference was that Jassy (12) refused to budge from her small island while Logan (11) was relieving himself when his partner died. The arena was silent overall as the surviving tributes collected themselves from the attacks. Other notable events being Andrei (2) and Wolvthorne (7) fending off a congregation of five alligators, being considered one of the most dangerous mutt packs ever.
Back in the commentator’s booth, Artemis was geeking out over the recent events. She considered Andrei and Wolvthorne barely Golden Victor material, adding that Mortimer was “definite”. Luther claimed to believe Cat was the same as well, with Artemis claiming she was a hair away. She diverted the topic to Mortimer and his great performance taking on three gators single-handedly. Luther wondered how he was feeling after failing to save Pearl, guessing he was blaming himself. This made Artemis interested in whether Cat could exercise more of her therapy skills.
Mortimer and Cat sat in silence as the raft continued to drift into the northwest sector. Cat took it upon herself to steer as Mortimer was lying down lost in a pool of tears. Cat eventually sat down and asked him if he was alright. At first, he didn’t answer, prompting Cat to tell him, “As your therapist, I suggest you let it all out. It will make you feel better.” The therapist part received a weird look, but Mortimer took a deep breath. More tears came out as he blamed himself for Pearl’s death, pointing out that he was the one who caused her to fall out. Cat assured him that it was an accident, but Mortimer argued that if he didn’t have trust issues with Cat, they wouldn’t have been fighting in the first place. Adding insult to injury, Pearl’s final act was to put his chemistry kit (their survival) over her own life. Cat agreed that his trust issues were a problem. She told him to explain what he thinks is the root cause of his issues. Mortimer was reluctant, but Cat explained that being honest about his childhood and inner demons could make all the difference. She rhetorically asked, “Whether you die here or win this thing, you want to go out a new man or not?” Mortimer admitted she had a point and decided to regale his childhood experience.
As told by Mortimer, he grew up with his father Edward Beckett, Faroe Island Base engineer, and his unemployed mother Ursula. After a workplace accident fractured his back, he was medically discharged and sent back to District 4. With no source of income to support them, Ursula left the family and never came back. Mortimer had no choice but to enter the workforce early in order to support himself and his disabled father. A few kindhearted adults, including Gill Henderson and Pearl’s father Alexander Riverstone, offered to lend their support. However, hurt by his mother’s abandonment and being bullied at school, he turned them away. Eventually, he dropped out of school at age nine and found work in a shipyard. Bullying would still persist outside of the workplace, even having his hard earned fishing equipment stolen by troublemakers like Adrian Carrick. It was around age fifteen when he first got himself entangled in a covert smuggling operation with District 6, trading fish and hooks in exchange for warmweed and soda bottles. On rare occasions, refugees fled the district and were given fake IDs. Mortimer saw what warmweed did to his peers and vowed never to consume it himself. He did notice the health benefits it possessed as a pain reliever and took it upon himself to study warmweed and find out a safe way to feed it to his father. He requested chemistry equipment and textbooks on his smuggling trips. He learned about the science of warmweed and engineering a method to separate the SHC (medical component) from the TBA (psychoactive compound) through trial and error. He would feed the SHC to his father, enabling him to walk for limited periods with assistance from a cane, and using the TBA in a secret grotto as bait to catch fish. Though there was no evidence, the citizens knew who the smugglers were and looked upon them in disdain.
In present time, Mortimer began to tear up some more, knowing what the next part was. Cat comforted him and assured him he could take a break. Mortimer insisted he finish. He talked about his girlfriend Meridia Vilewater, who against her family’s wishes, fell for him and successfully befriended him. He admitted that he found her presence annoying at first, but realized her feelings and intent were genuine. He began to fall for her as well, further cementing his hoodlum image. He even talked about the Kraken tattoo she did for him. Mortimer lamented how he took her for granted a lot and didn’t reciprocate as much as she did. He asked himself why she would continue to see him. Cat pondered over this for a few seconds. She told him that Meridia recognized his dedication to his father and knew deep down that he was a compassionate person. “What’s not to love?” Cat said. “You are handsome, strong, and talented. Come to think of it, the parallels between you and your mentor are hard to ignore.” Mortimer said that Gill was right on how he was basically him if he suffered worse. Cat guessed that’s why he took a personal interest in him.
Cat told him that even though he was dealt a heavy hand in life, he shouldn’t completely give up on humanity. She expressed how she was always close to giving up, having to see addicts tarnishing their bodies willingly and turning their nose up to treatment. However, it was the one in ten successful cases that continually recapture her hope. Cat continued how he already was taking a good first step in trusting Meridia and takes that as a sign of him having the potential to let himself be happy. Mortimer pondered over this and agreed. He made a solemn vow that if he wins, he would make things right with everyone, adding how Pearl would want that. Cat offered her hand in helping him make it to the end, declaring their victory to be for Pearl. Mortimer thanked her for listening and promised that if she wins, she will make an excellent therapist.
Suddenly, a cannon sounded in the distance. It was revealed to be Logan (11) after Horace (10) took advantage of his hysterics and beat him to death with a log. The heart to heart talk captivated the Capital, touched by Mortimer’s rare moment of vulnerability and in awe of Cat’s therapy skills. Both of their odds greatly increased, sharing first and second place. Artemis conceded and said Cat was Golden Victor material now, but hoped she does something explosive in the finale.
The next several hours were uneventful and tributes were still on edge. They had a perfect reason to as there were still alligator mutts patrolling the deeper bodies of water. The water had become so cloudy that one couldn’t see an inch below the surface. On top of that, the sulphur smell had gotten worse, causing some tributes to dry heave and cover their mouths. Jassy (12) took longer than expected to do this, her dry heaves giving Maximus Square a laugh. John (9) was bitten on the thigh by a gator when he got too close to the lake. He killed it with his knife and dragged himself into a hollow log to patch himself up. Andrei and Wolvthorne were camping close to John’s hiding spot. They were gorging on the food and water sponsors gifted them after killing the gators while complaining to each other about the smell. They left one water bottle unattended, giving a window of opportunity for Peggy (8) who hid in a tree over the course of the games. She was caught by Wolvthorne, but managed to escape with the water bottle. During the chase, Wolvthorne tripped and spotted John inside the log. He dragged him out of the log and proceeded to hack him to death with his axe in a fury. John’s cannon sounded at the fifth strike. The Capital fangroup The Mutts cheered for Peggy’s victory, but they received jeers from the Buccaneers (D4 fangroup) and the Lumberjacks (D7 fangroup).
It was near sundown when Mortimer and Cat entered unfamiliar territory. After three deaths in under an hour, the smell was much worse. Cat nearly fell off the raft while struggling to hold her breakfast in. They landed at a small shoreline and came face to face to a heavy brush. Cat picked up a small log and hurled it into the brush. When nothing bounced back, she guessed there was a secret area behind it. She commended Mortimer for being right and asked what they should do. He stated that as much as he wanted to explore, it was getting dark and they should camp. Cat agreed and the two started a fire. She became exasperated by the sulphur smell and asked how they could ignore it. Mortimer borrowed her sword and ripped one of their backpacks to shreds. He tied some pieces together and fashioned them into masks. The two now had something to barely stave off the powerful sewer smell.
Their relief turned to dismay when they discovered their last water bottle had one gulp left. What made the situation worse was that with no more hydrogen peroxide, they lost their means of purifying more water. Mortimer insisted she drink it. Cat accepted it and drank it. She raised the water bottle in the air and asked the sky to “fill her up”. Surprisingly, two sponsor gifts floated down to them seconds after saying this. One held a first aid kit while the other had two water bottles and two sandwiches. Cat doctored Mortimer’s right eye with a special cream from the kit. After she was done, the two ate their sandwiches.
Cat asked to see his tattoo. Mortimer shyly rolled his lycra suit off. The Kraken and the treasure chest became visible. Cat crawled closer and traced her fingers on the tentacles, marvelling at the design. Mortimer revealed Meridia liked to paint and desired to be District 4’s first female tattoo artist, using him as her guinea pig. He didn’t forget to attribute the treasure chest and polishing to Minerva. The viewers in Maximus Square were sensing the sexual tension, oohing and aahing as Cat continued to trace the tentacles. Artemis was fanning herself in the commentator’s booth, hoping the two would kiss. Luther slapped her shoulder, reminding her he had a girlfriend. Cat’s fingers arrived at the treasure chest on Mortimer’s actual chest and the two locked eyes. The two leaned closer until their faces were two inches apart. The sudden awareness of their actions dawned on them and they awkwardly distanced themselves by five feet. Mortimer said he was loyal to Meridia and didn’t want to betray that trust even in the arena. Cat apologised, excusing it to her imagining what might have been if she asked her coworker Pedal out. Mortimer promised her that she could do it if she wins. She thanked him, him joking how it felt good to be the therapist this one time. The rest of the night was without incident. A hovercraft entered the arena to display the portraits of the fallen. The fallen included Pearl (4), Wren (5), John (9), and Carnelia and Logan (11). This left Andrei (2), Mortimer (4), Cat (6), Wolvthorne (7), Peggy (8), Horace (10), and Jassy (12) remaining.

submitted by Mortimer_Whimsiwick to christianblanco [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 20:02 makinta219 In Deep Thought

I've been stuck in my head since January. For added context, I met this girl on FetLife who for legal reasons we will call Terra, back in 2021. I was in South Bend during Ramencon looking for a hook up. I was lonely, and before you judge, my spouse at the time and I were swingers but going through a rough patch. My spouse at the time had asked me to be in an open relationship and up until that moment at the convention, I hadn't explored it.
Terra, who this story is about, ignored me at first because she was married and I respected that. I told her if she ever changed her mind to seek me out. Fast forward a few months later she starts commenting on my photos, liking and sharing my post. There was a Star Wars convention coming up in South Bend and I told her I would be in town. We met on March 26th, 2022. She was pregnant but wanted to hook up. It was only supposed to be a one night stand, I had not intentions of catching feelings. However when she came into the room, I felt an instant connection with her. My soul recognized hers. We sat on the bed, I gave her a massage and I asked her questions about herself to see if we were compatible. The sex was amazing, and we went a few rounds.
When we were done, I sat away from her for a bit. I asked when was the last time she was held? She paused and told me never. She told me her ex had abused her and that she was going to raise her son on her own. I respected this and stayed in my lane because I had a daughter at home. My daughter's mom and I were having a lot of issues. I spent time with my daughter throughout the week until I went to work. Some nights my child's mother would not come home until 5 AM the next morning. My child's mother allowed her mother, child's grandmother, to live with us for what was only supposed to be 3 to 6 months but this turned into almost 2 years until I finally had enough.

I would drive to South Bend every weekend starting from March 26th to see Terra. I was with her on her birthday April 4th, and wanted to surprise her, so I laid out flowers, went and got us food even though she refused to eat at first, and I got her a birthday Balloon. I had access to Daily Pay so I would withdraw part of my check to rent us a room and hang out. I was gentle with her because of the baby but she brought out this side of me I never knew I had. My bills were paid so I didn't think much of it.

I enjoyed our time together. It was like an escape from reality, but during one of our visits, I noticed she told me..."he's nice...I can use him."
I was put off by this statement, and I hesitated being around her because I didn't want her to think I was just some lonely sucker who would give her everything...except that was exactly what I was to her. She called me her dog who she could whistle and I would come running to. I feel sick to my stomach just thinking about it. Yet...despite everything I was falling in love with her.

It came to a time where I told my child's mother the truth. Even though she knew about the other woman, I admitted that I had fallen out of love with her and I was in love with this new woman who I felt completed me in ways she couldn't. I got very tired of the verbal and sometimes physical abuse from my child's mother, and I found comfort in this other woman who was always there, even getting to the point where while I was at Exxxotica for my birthday in 2022, all I could think about was Terra. She even surprised me and drove out to see me on my birthday.

My child's mother and I separated in June. I ended up on child support but Terra was there. It scared me to be this close to someone, because my intuition told me to keep my guard up. Then one day she told me she was only using me to speed up her birthing process and that she planned to ghost me once the baby was here...but that changed and she started to actually like me.
Feeling like this was too good to be true, I blocked her on everything, Facebook, Twitter, FetLife, Instagram...any means of contact she was gone. She text me and asked why? I told her I didn't want to get hurt. If she didn't want me in her life, I would leave to save us both the trouble. She told me she started to care so I gave her another chance. I was hesitant...we met up a few more times and she took me to see Dr. Strange and the Multiverse of Madness in theaters. We went to a buffet and I felt this connection I had never felt before. It scared me...I felt like she would hurt me again and she admitted to being invited to a gangbang but left because she didn't want to hurt me.
I wanted to leave but I stayed. I told myself and her we could work it out so long as communication was open. I stopped entertaining other women, and aside from my daughter, she was the only woman who had my complete attention. I was never the only man. She went to Tennessee and we started binging Future Diary together. She told me she had another man she was into. Again I walked away believing I was a burden on her life. She told me...she didn't want to be in a relationship but she didn't want the sex to stop. I told her I was not ready for a relationship but despite the protest we were in some way still committed to one another for a period of time.
When she came back in town from Tennessee, I allowed Terra and her to stay with me. I enjoyed having her there despite the way she treated me at times. I didn't expect to come home to a clean house, or food on the counter. I asked why she did it? Bragged about her to my coworkers, and had nothing but love and respect for her. Except...the respect wasn't mutual. I would see her talking trash about me on social media and I would confront her. She told me it was nothing to worry about yet...I kept forgiving her. I knew I could find better but I only wanted her. We broke up on Christmas, she told me she didn't want to be together and I said okay. I stopped communicating with her, blocked contact, but she created another account and reached out to me. We agreed to just be friends and have sex but she was with another man. I refused to be second place to any man. I started noticing she post pictures in my apartment naked on my furniture. I asked her to remove them. She refused and stated if I posted them she would sue me for defamation of character despite constantly bashing me online when she swore up and down she didn't want people to know we were together. Terra had shown her true colors and it made me sick...yet I still had love for her. I remembered the good in her and believed she only acted out because of her environment. I was wrong.
I returned her things to her and in February, I saw Terra face to face. She asked if we could hang out still, and I told her she was welcomed as I retrieved my keys from her, when I came back for Valentine's Day, she laughed at me stating she didn't want to be seen with me. I felt I had wasted my time, money and energy and left her be. I woke up one morning to threats of a restraining order and she'd even threatened my life if I had tried to contact her again. I thought to myself how could I have been so stupid? I almost lost everything trying to hold on to her. When she left my life slowly got better but I still missed Terra. It was like Teen Titans, no matter what I said...no matter how often I tried I couldn't get through to her until I eventually just had to give up on her and move on which has been hard because a part of me still misses her.

submitted by makinta219 to RomaArmyMensRights [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 20:00 Marleyandme2008 Advice please :)

Hello all! I have a 14 week old mini golden doodle. He loves being around me and my girlfriend. He sometimes sleeps through the night in his crate and if not, it’s usually 1 potty break over night. Sometimes he will wake up while a little and go back to sleep, sometimes he needs to come out, fall asleep on the floor and have us place him back in. Sometimes when he is really tired I can get him to walk in and fall asleep with me sitting next to the crate. Drop the towel over and leave.
I can get him to enter the crate no problem with a command. However he doesn’t love staying in, especially for now during the day.
As for leaving him alone, I work from home and have admittedly not been Great at this because we have a loft style apartment. I am working on increasing time with me leaving the apartment little by little while keeping him preoccupied with a frozen Kong. I am up to 15 min with no issues. Honestly he has zero issues being alone or without me as long as he has a yummy kong or something that gives him food. However if he doesn’t have something to keep him busy and yummy he barks and whines relentlessly.
With all that being said, am I experiencing separation anxiety? How do you test how he will be for lengths greater than a frozen long can achieve?
Just looking for general advice. Thank you all.

submitted by Marleyandme2008 to puppy101 [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 19:58 DEEZWHATS Had to say goodbye to my Bruce yesterday. This is unbelievably hard.

We said goodbye to our 14 year old Frenchie yesterday. He declined rapidly, seemingly out of nowhere in about 2 weeks. From normal, to progressively more lethargic, to not being able to walk more than 10 steps and falling.
We took him to the vet for a comprehensive exam with blood work and XRays. Results came back in the evening and they found he had severe CHF. It’s just so odd because he seemed fine a few weeks ago.
We knew the end was near for him, and didn’t want him to suffer. Yesterday we we knew we had to say goodbye as soon as we woke up. He wasn’t able to make it too far before we had to pick him up and take him where he needed to go, and he just looked tired. We made arrangements in the morning for his final car ride, and we were able to spend some quality time with him in the couch while he was resting. He took a nap, had some snacks, got some water and then he looked at me on the couch telling me it was time, and that he was ok. Ok in the sense that he was ready. He was calm, and strong on the car ride to the vet. We took our other Frenchie with us so he would understand that Bruce was gone.
We waited on the floor with Bruce in his comfy floor bed we brought from home. The room had floor to ceiling windows, which was nice. The weather was unusually nice for this time of year, sun was shining and humidity was low. Bruce caught a glimpse of a bird that came up to the glass exterior door and he popped up to take a look. They got the IV, and when the doctor came in with the meds my wife and I held him. He was so calm, so strong. Much stronger than we were. It was very peaceful. Beautiful in a way.
Still very fresh in my mind and needed an outlet. Hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.

submitted by DEEZWHATS to Petloss [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 19:58 Fractal-Farter Aliens!?

I believe they are and I believe it's selfish to think we're the only intelligent species and blah, blah, blah. Here are my stories of the encounters I've had. 1. Just into double digit age, walking through the woods near my house, I pass this creek and there before me is a bright light followed by weird near mechanical shrieks, but rhythmic like speech, after I remember I'm back in my backyard sitting. 2. Seems like a dream, there I am in some kind of craft looking out of these gigantic windows, looking down on earth. 3. Similar to first, seemed like a dream, same craft, looking down on earth, yet this time the windows just continue down through a rounded corridor, I never see the creature, but they speak telepathicly. "You're welcome here and aren't alone" is what they say. 4.This happened last night, myself, my girlfriend and a friend(not living with us) have this same strange "dream" with a few small variation, of which I will get into.
The similarities in the 3 are we all feel weightless, and see ourselves lying in our beds asleep yet we still ascend into the sky, a bright light and all of a sudden the feel of cold steel touch our skin, we come to and notice we are in what looks like fish bowl, thick windows and steel all around us. We look out the windows and that's one if the differences we all see something different. My friend sees literally nothing, no stars, not a thing. My girlfriend sees a whole new world a whole new galaxy possibly, far more vibrant than our own, mine, I simply see our big blue marble, but she's on fire.
After our sights we all hear a voice yet see no one that could give off the voice, no visible speakers to speak off, the voice says "this could your future." We then are escorted around this fishbowl like structure, the voice continues "don't worry though, you're here for a reason." We then all see that bright ass light again and begin to descend back into our beds, we see our bodies again and fall into them. Again this is where we differ. My friend has another experience, he then begins to float in some random river(not sure if connected but it happened), my girlfriend just wakes up in a cold sweat filled with paranoia, I, myself wake up with a strange thing looking at me.

submitted by Fractal-Farter to ParanormalEncounters [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 19:51 TexasAstros What’s the best way to advocate for crosswalks/pedestrian signal heads on busy roads?

Before y’all say it- I know Houston isn’t walking friendly. Still would like to do something though.
I live near Washington (closer to downtown not the bars) and I walk to Sawyer Yards & the bayou pretty often with my dog. The intersection of Washington Ave & Sawyer St is getting busier with all the new developments, but crossing the street is a mess. I’ve almost been hit 4 or 5 times in the last 2 months. Since there are no crosswalks or pedestrian signals cars are always turning without paying attention.
Who is the best point of contact? TxDot? Congressman? The City?

submitted by TexasAstros to houston [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 19:51 KodokushiGirl Wholesome dreams about someone in my past who was not the best to me.

Some background: He was a poor communicator unless we were in person and would constantly let me down, "forget" or go back on promises made. It was clear he didn't care or couldn't be bothered with me if i got too much for him i guess. I'd just be ignored until i waited long enough for him to reply or i essentially, blew up his phone. which was usually what happened. I'd vent my frustrations, try to distance, ghost him even but he would act hurt by those actions and want me to "come back" to the friendship but never compromised on what i asked of him. Once he moved away, he didn't care about maintaining the friendship. It was rough but i eventually and finally removed him and stuck to it. With that out of the way let's get to the dreams...
I've had about 3 vivid dreams about him. To preface, I don't remember my dreams. Ever. (Aka i dont dream) but whenever i wake up from a full rest and go back to sleep to catch some extra Zzz's, thats when i get the weirdest dreams like being young again with all my elementary class mates going through this maze like house while everyone is roasting/bullying me or trying to fight someone but my arms are like wet noodles no matter how hard i swing. I try to run away but im slower than a snail despite going full speed.
With him, the dreams were EXTREMELY WHOLESOME (he, irl is an antisocial loner who ill look you dead in the eye and walk away mid conversation if he doesn't know you and doesn't want to talk). The first one was last year so the memory has faded but the second one happened a little over a month ago. I was in Laos and strangely i was there with the side of my family i dont like. It was a good time. Everyone was having fun on the beach, by the water etc. I went in to some sort of beach restaurant and i saw him from the corner of my eye but wasn't sure if he saw me, I avoided him and went back to my family. I see him walk by while im with them but this time we make eye contact. I don't acknowledge i just kind of act like i looked past him. I go back to the place where i first saw him (i think for food, idk its a dream lol) and he sees me again, eye contact again, but this time i smile but still look away. Next thing i know he's approaching me and he is in full uniform (Air force vet but was wearing a Marine uniform in my dream. Idk why) in front of me catching up with me and we end up just talking and walking along the beach and i eventually go my separate ways back to my family and then i wake up.
The reason i think im in Laos or even Vietnam at this time is because before i stopped talking to him, he was vacationing in one of these places which I also plan to go to for my own trip when im older. But I don't understand why i was having a good time with people I personally cutted out of my life.
The second dream i had today. Same situation of falling asleep again. I was with friends in this dream and we were having a good time (outside settingni believe. We were on a bench) then he appears and again, same old catching up but he's completely changed in physical appearance this time. He had outrageous ink and piercings and facial implants, grew his hair out longer than before had a whole different style too. It surprisingly didn't turn me away, i still found him easy on the eyes in the face. In this dream he was a lot more openly affectionate: hugs, sitting close, forehead kisses and just seeming like he changed but it was a maaaajor 180. All of these gestures I did not reciprocate or acknowledge. I just smiled and continue whatever i was doing.
I guess what i want to know is, why am I having better-than-reality dreams about someone who I have long since cut off and want nothing to do with anymore? I genuinely dont miss him. He made me feel shitty about myself without even trying. And I went quite a long time (little over 3 months) without a thought or care or regard in the world about him. He is absolutely a chapter close. And yet my dreams make me feel like there's such a high possibility of us running in to each other again (there's not, i promise) if we do i will not act like everything is fine like i did last time. I will call him out and want answers if i ever have the displeasure of meeting him again.
So why the wholesome shit brain???

submitted by KodokushiGirl to DreamInterpretation [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 19:47 kidkipp My (29F) boyfriend (27M) won’t make plans.

TLDR; I’m just trying to decipher my feelings and get some outsider opinions about the situation. Not sure if I should leave or adjust my expectations and mindset.
We have been together for four years and he has pretty bad agoraphobia (fear of having a panic attack in a place that you don’t feel safe having one). This limits the things that he is willing to do as a couple, and I get that, but I’m still constantly being disappointed, especially on special occasions.
He either backs out of plans I make at the last minute, tells me to ask a friend, or says he’ll plan something within his limits and then just never does. For example, for my birthday a few years ago (before we determined the extent of his disorder) I scheduled a week off work to take a road trip together to the great lakes to hopefully see the northern lights. He agreed! I had all these fun stops planned along the way, like sand boarding and a place similar to Meow Wolf. As a girl, I don’t feel comfortable camping alone so far from home, and there are some things that you want to do as a couple and not with a friend. He backed out two days before and told me he would plan something else. I wasted all of my vacation days at work since I only got 5 that year because he ended up just “planning” something for my one birthday day. But the “plan” was a “shopping spree” of $100. I thanked him but admitted that I was disappointed, because I didn’t want his money but memories together and it felt a bit like a cop-out for making activity decisions. He said it was his mom’s idea….
That was the worst. I just want someone to do fun things with. I want a guy who likes to camp or snowboard or play video games together or go to concerts at cool venues around the country. He won’t travel further than an hour from home or commit to overnight trips of any kind. But the problem is that, other than this, we get along great and have a lot in common and show each other so much unconditional love. I keep hoping he will heal from his agoraphobia, but I’m almost 30 and feel like I’m giving up the best years of my life. I also plan to go to vet school in a year or two, and I’ll be far too busy to do longer trips then.
Anyway, our four year anniversary falls on Memorial Day. Back in February I had a long talk with him about how I felt lonely in the relationship. The conversation was hard but ended on a great note. We communicate and resolve problems better than any relationship I’ve ever known. I told him that it would mean the world to me if he would plan something for Memorial Day for our anniversary. Not like a dinner. I had a few conditions, basically something we wouldn’t normally be able to do- like an overnight trip somewhere different than the town we live in that was close enough for him to feel comfortable. I also asked him not to wait until the day before because things would book up I wanted to be able to look forward to it and not worry that he had forgotten or become stressed and tried to sweep it under the rug.
It’s now the day before Memorial Day. Last night I asked what he wanted to do and he said “idk, it might be raining but frisbee would be fun”. He said it all excitedly and cute. I truly don’t think he remembers our conversation from February, even though I’ve gently reminded him to plan something a few times since then. Our relationship has been so happy and full of love lately that I feel guilty for being upset. But I ask for SO LITTLE.
I also asked him to go to a concert an hour away recently, my FAVORITE band, and said I’d buy his ticket. He laughed and said no because he doesn’t like them or the town it was in. None of my friends were free or liked the band enough to go. I had seen them alone before and didn’t enjoy it as much by myself or feel safe walking back to my car in that city. I wish he’d been willing to go knowing how much it would have meant to me.
I’m going to mention the anniversary thing today. Like, hey you forgot, you know? And I know he’s going to apologize or say he thought the concert we went to a few weekends ago counted. But I’m just tired of the disappointment. It sucks to think about breaking up when everything else is so amazing and we have so much love for each other. I have told myself that I could just stop asking him to do anything and only do things with my friends from now on, but it’s just not the same.
I guess I just needed to type it all out and see what everyone else has to say about it. A penny for your thoughts?

submitted by kidkipp to relationships [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 19:43 InsaneMemeposting Some of My Political Influences: An Observation

For my 2nd official Angry Observation I decided to have some fun with it so I will talk about some of my political influences and how they influenced me. I know everyone is going to expect me to put a bunch of right wingers and call it a day but I might surprise you. Anyways lets begin.

Theodore Roosevelt

When Theodore Roosevelt was nominated as Vice President it was assumed that he would just sit there for 4 years and disappear as the party bosses wanted. They had seen what he was doing in New York with cleaning up corruption and passing popular things for the people and they hated it and how popular he was getting. In 1901 though everything changed. The president William McKinley, a conservative Republican assassinated by a crazed anarchist. Now Theodore Roosevelt, the man who the establishment and the elites hated the most was now president. Roosevelt realized that the country was broken. Regulations were not working and monopolies were rampant while the common man was being worked to death.so Roosevelt decided that he must use the office as a bully pulpit for the people and by god he did ushering in the Progressive era. During his time in office he passed regulations on Monopolies, he began the process of trust busting, he regulated the meat industry, he brokered an end to a war, and he created multiple National Parks, keeping with his goal of conservation. His influence on America is still felt to this day and I count him as an influence of mine because when the people needed a champion against the establishment he was there to combat the powerful in the name of the common man.

Winston Churchill

Now this one will be controversial because of his racism and I do not condone that part of him. But I can't help but respect something about him. It is his determination to keep pushing forward regardless of the odds. It was something that he did throughout his life. Like for example when he was captured during the Boer War he escaped and walked 300 miles to his freedom. During WW1 his determination to keep moving forward did cost him with the Gallipoli campaign, a daring operation to knock out the Ottoman Empire from the war but instead it ended in a disaster which led to Winston entering the Wilderness years of his career. During this time he began to write about history and focus on the world while supporting his beloved Empire. In 1933 though things changed when Hitler rose to power in germany. Winston almost immediately recognized that Hitler was a massive threat to global security and began to speak out against Germany and the threat posed by the nazis. But yet no one listened. He was just some old man so why listen to him? Besides, no one wanted another war after the last one. So he was ignored even as Hitler put the country fully under his control and began to build up the military. As the years drew on and as Hitler continued the buildup and began to take over land the old man in the bowler hat was proven to be completely correct on the Nazis yet the leadership of the UK under Chamberlain thought if he just made a deal with the Nazis then there would be peace in our time. But once the Germans marched into Czechoslovakia proper once again Churchill, who by now had the support of the public again, was proven right. So when September of 1939 hit and Germany invaded Poland the UK was forced into the war and it was finally showtime for Churchill. He was almost immediately put in the cabinet and oversaw the defense. But PM Chamberlain was ailing so in early 1940 he stepped down and Winston Churchill was appointed PM of the UK. When Winston assumed power the situation looked dire. France was falling and Britain suffered a humiliating defeat at Dunkirk. But Winston decided to do what he did best and push through the adversity and talk to the people in the way he always did it, as the old but strong bulldog. When France surrendered people expected that the UK would surrender as well. But it didn't. Instead Winston vowed to keep fighting on, even though most logic stated that a surrender was the best option. And once again Winston was proven right. Even through the Blitz he rallied the people to the cause and provided a bulwark of strength through Britains finest hour. And he continued that hardiness throughout the war leading to the ultimate victory of the allies over Fascism and saving Europe in the process. So through all of that his story teaches us one thing to never give up. Never give in to pressure. And keep moving forward. And that is why he is an inspiration to me.

George Washington

Now for the best president in American History George Washington. George Washington when he became president he had an amazing resume. A military man, he had served with distinction in the 7 years war and then led the armies of the rebelling colonists in a fight for their freedom from the oppressive British government. He had then retired after the war until the Congress called for him as president. The congress of the united states was already horribly divided between the Republicans of Alexander Hamilton and the Anti Republicans of Thomas Jefferson. But both sides could agree on one man for the job as president and that was George Washington. When he got there he immediately showed his character by refusing to be called his excellency instead he wanted to be called Mr President. As President he understood as the first president he would set precedents so he ruled with moderation, never overstepping his grounds and respecting the separation of powers. He advocated for a strong national government for keeping the peace between the states and practiced Neutrality between the US and Britain. When France exploded into a revolution Jefferson begged for the US to intervene to support France but Washington in his non partisan wisdom knew that the US was not ready for a war so he supported Neutrality. When Washington left office in 1797 he left a lasting legacy of moderation and setting up the country well with his precedents. But before he left he gave the first farewell address and warned us about the dangers of getting involved internationally with alliances like what happened in Europe. When he passed away in 1799 he was considered widely America's greatest citizen and to this day he is still revered. He is an influence of mine because he taught the importance of non-partisanship and ruling with moderation, never abusing the office for personal gain and doing what was right by the people.
And that was just 3 of my political Influences. I hope you enjoyed it and please if you want to write about your own influences go ahead I would love to read them!

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2023.05.28 19:40 NoTradition 3 MO Won’t stop playing with his hands at night

Up until last week I’d been swaddling my guy. It was working pretty well, until he started figuring out how to get his hands free. I have several varieties of swaddles and He figured out how to bust out of all of them.
So I bought a magic Merlin suit and the first night I used it, It worked great. It’s been about a week since we started it and it seems like his sleep has progressively gotten worse.
The main issue is he’s playing with his hands. Will keep them at the center of his chest and just kind of rub them together, and then as he’s falling asleep, they’ll slowly drop to his sides. His startle reflex will kick in and he’ll do that enough times, until he finally wakes himself up. I’ve tried gently holding his arms down while he’s trying to fall asleep, but if I walk away or let go, he’s back to the hand rubbing.
Any pro tips on navigating this particular issue? Any other good sleep tips in general are highly appreciated as well!

submitted by NoTradition to NewParents [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 19:36 NotWhatIHopeFor Could this be it?

First off very sorry for misspelling or not making sense, today is probably the start of what is the end, so please bare with me.
Hi, I'm 48(M) for all my life I have been battling to be accepted, to see if I had a family, my parents were very abusive to me, I got hit with brooms, pulled hair, ears, with closed fists on the stomach, back and head.
My mother never said one word to stop the abuse and she her self was part of it at times, my brother would cry about things that we did and then I would get the brunt of it, if my brother got bad grades guess who got the bad end of stick.
Last night it came to a final end, to start my father died 16 years ago, and at his final days me and him had a conversation and he was very sorry for how he treated me, at that point at was at peace, but last night my brother and my mother just went off on me, reason being was that me and my son were walking in Prescott, Az and the whole family went for "family time, at the point that when were returning to Phoenix, me and my son were walking to the car, my mother got very upset because I wasn't walking at the same pace as her and my sister in law and both of them think that I did it on purpose because I didn't want to be part of the "group". This was complete BS, some point of reference I live in Plano, Tx, my sons live in Phoenix, so we are taking a trip to New Zealand tomorrow and I'm in Phoenix to spend time with them and my supposed family. Returning to the car thing, as I got to the car, my thinking is let me hurry up an go get them, well, as I'm turning the car on, I get a call from my sister in law, telling me to go get them, which is what I was doing exactly, I went I pick them up a couple of blocks down, the car was parked in a very steeped hill, I go pick them up, they didn't seem upset or anything, so I picked them up and I dropped my sister in law where my brother's truck was parked.
As we were driving back to Phoenix, the first thing I get from my mother is this rant as to why I didn't wait for them, I told her that this always happens I for some reason or other I'm at fault for doing something that wasn't intentional, she got super upset, all the drive back to Phoenix was quiet, but I felt hopeless like I'm just done, I Just can't anymore.
We come home, the first thing my son says, "Please take me home, I don't want to spend the night here", I understood why, so I took my son home, as I was returning to my brother's house, I get a text message that "we need to talk", so I was just like had no emotions I felt nothing like I could care less.
I come home and both my brother and mother just go off on my, calling me a liar when they don't understand when I'm talking to them, bringing things from the past, that had no substance whatsoever, in all of this I was surprised that I didn't feel anger, sadness, I was just chill defending myself of them calling me a liar, that it's all in my head that nothing that I say to them is true, my brother has never ever cared one bit about my depression in fact, I blame him for part of it, my mother also has a part in this, and the way that they were going after me felt like more of trying to excuse themselves for not understanding me, than trying to actually understand my disease and how to help and cope with it.
This visit to Phoenix was to actually look for a house to be close to my children but in all, after this I just can't the pain is too much, just to think that I live in the same city as them and to think of the painful things they told me, I don't know if I can, I have a very stable life in Plano, Tx, but the fact that I can't move closer to my boys hurts like hell, but I think that also I have to look out for my mental health, but last night has brought me thoughts of suicide and thoughts of worthlessness and I can't cry and can't be sad, it's just feels different than other times, I just wanted to rant to see if I can but seems like this is on another level.

submitted by NotWhatIHopeFor to depression [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 19:32 softspokenbb Things that I thought was normal but it really wasn't ok...

TW: SA, CSA, Grooming
I am in therapy now, actually trying to do the work so that I can get to a place where I feel that I am ok. You can't break something that's already broken but you can do your best to atleast create something better. As much as I'd like to think I had a happy childhood there are parts that weren't great that I feel kind of overshadows everything. My mom had me really young, and the way that I think about it is that we grew up together. I have a hard time seeing my mother as a mother because if you look at our relationship it seems like she was more of a friend than a mother. I've watched her get into bad relationships, even be abused and still there were times it seemed like I hardly knew her, almost like she was missing from a good portion of my memories from back then.
I know she did the best she could trying to do things on her own, but things happen. I've been left with people who I shouldn't have been left with. I wanna say it started around kindergarten maybe even first grade. I was meant to be walked home from school by her friend's son since our moms were friends and he was a couple years older. Sparing the details but while our mom's were at work I'd have to sit at his house alone with him and he'd have me do things. I never told my mom about it. Fast forward she gets into a relationship and we move in with a man who has kids. 2 boys 1 girl, the older son would also make me do things when our parents went out. There was one day that they came back early and it was caught. The crazy part is that the older son never got in trouble, I never saw him get yelled at or anything... but I was. I remember my mom telling me that I was nasty, and I told her he made me do it. Her response was, "if someone told you to jump off a cliff, would you do it?" And she threatened to tell my grandma. The thing is my grandma was basically my mom, I was always "safe" with her. It wasn't until we started moving around that things happened.
Being a young girl, I always got a lot of attention from older people. I remember there being a really big girl she either could've been fifth grade maybe even 6th that was supposed to babysit while my mom was at work that did those same things the other older boys had. Other things happened but again sparing the details. Fast forward, I'm in 6th grade now and we are learning about computers. One girl taught me how to make an email account to sign up and play games online as well as tell me about a website where kids can chat online with each other. So when I would go home I'd work on projects on my grandma's computer in her room. Then I'd play a couple games before going to this chat site.
Yeah there were kids my age but then there were also "kids" who claimed to be 13-15 and as the messages progressed would say they are 27 or so and if you'd want to keep talking. They'd ask to talk off chat and on email instead or some messaging app. They'd send pictures and ask for pictures and I just thought that it was normal back then. It got to a point where I liked the attention from these older men and I'd do whatever to keep talking to them. I didn't really get a lot of attention at home at this point. I'd come home, and I would have to clean up basically the entire house.... picture cinderella it was something like that and I just hated my life. I would be ignored by my mom, she'd go to work, come home and she'd just be on her phone. If I tried to talk to her it was like she didn't here me. So talking to men online continued without anyone ever noticing. I'd go on to get my own cell phone later on and when the chat site went down I moved on to talking to men on dating sites. I'd set the age to 18 but would be honest and tell them my age and some of them stayed and talked. There was also Omegle, that I would talk to people on. And "relationships" would develop... and sometimes your online "boyfriend" would start to be creepy and when you decide to end things it became they are going to hurt themselves if you stop talking to them.
Fast forward again at junior year of high school, end of the year... I discover Craigslist personals and I was still talking to guys on the dating sites. I lost my virginity to a 53 yr old in his truck without protection and I wasn't on the pill yet. No pregnancy came from that... but again I hated my life so much that I started responding to ads on Craigslist about having babies and staying home and being taken care of. I met one guy he was 43 at the time, he wanted a baby, and I wanted away from my home life of just being ignored and expected to clean all day after grown ups. I got into a really bad argument with my mom, and I had decided to run away from home with this guy. I left for like less than 24 hours. He picked me up, he took me to his house we had sex and I just remember crying the entire time because I didn't like it, it was painful. He freaked out the next day and said he needed to take me home before it was reported. He took me home... later that day I made up with my mom and apologized for leaving. However I still kept in touch with this man. I'd lie about where I was going, say I was going to a friend's house to stay over, but I'd be at his house, and he wanted to marry me. He wanted me to move in with him, to have his kids. It never happened, my mom didn't find out anything until after I had turned 18 and she was absolutely livid.
I still kept in touch with this man, even went to stay with him for like a week when I was 19 and he tried to force himself on me and I called a friend whi came to pick me up and all of my things and took me back home after he put me out for refusing him.
I went on to get into even more bad relationships, one night stands with older men... one of them being a very abusive relationship that lasted almost 2 years... now in my late 20s and starting to open up about everything in therapy, none of this was ok. It isn't normal and no one, no child or anyone at all should ever feel like this is ok. I know that I am partially to blame for the things that happened. However I still tell people it's important to sit down and talk with their kids about these things, it can be avoided, they should no right from wrong, and not accept the attention they get from a predator because they feel like they are alone... I'm still lucky to be here. Even with me being in my late 20s I am still struggling with leaving the older men alone... you fall prey to these abusive and narcissistic people when you haven't healed old wounds.

submitted by softspokenbb to offmychest [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 19:26 bringmemywinekyle I’m looking at moving to Goderich. Pros and cons please? Also interested in if there are walk in clinics and what the local hospital is like. Thank you!

submitted by bringmemywinekyle to Goderich [link] [comments]