​
“We’ll, she must be suicidal.” Aron said as he pointed his weapon at the figure.
“How about instead of just shooting everyone we try to take her alive, she looks important.” Cole said.
“Cole’s right.” Gram replied. “In other words, aim for non lethal.”
“Bite me! If she decides to fight she’s gonna get a fight!” Uzi said as she pointed her railgun at the figure.
“Damn right.” Aron said as he smiled.
Somehow even with a ballistic face mask on the Figure looked to roll her 2 red glowing ‘eyes’.
“I guess I’ll just hold our friend here while you guys deal with that.” V said as she also rolled her eyes.
Popping the smoke bomb, it suddenly filled the room before anyone could fire, still everyone had the same reaction of shooting into it. V with her MP5SD, Aron with his AR, Cole with his AA12 and Gram with his MP5K. Gunfire rang out throughout the hallways and casings fell onto the floor but everyone ran out of ammo and reloaded except for V who held her gun facing the ceiling while Uzi held her railgun and scanned the smoke, however strangely nothing was there. Thad meanwhile grabbed a metal pipe from the ground as he backed up behind V.
“Coward.” V said under her breath as she glanced at Thad.
“Hey! I’m not a MD ok?” Thad replied.
Silence lay upon the team as everyone wondered if whoever that figure was was dead, gone, or something else. Unfortunately they were wrong.
Emerging from the smoke the figure seemed to dive through the air and onto Aron clunking him against a wall. Firing her M45 at his chest each of the shots ricocheting off his armor and behind her with only slight dents left, and eventually running out of ammo as the M45’s slide stayed back and each gunshot was replaced by a constant clicking.
“What is it sweetheart? Didn’t bring AP rounds?” Said Aron as he smirked. Everyone else trained their weapons on the figure as she held Aron.
Annoyed, the figure tossed the M45 in the air to catch it by the barrel and pistol whipping Aron’s helmet hitting so hard it knocked the night vision off its mounting onto the floor and dented his helmet with blood staining the wound.
Aron didn’t let himself get hit without a fight as he immediately pulled a knife from his side and tried to stab the figure, however she was faster.
V rolled her eyes and was about to fire on the figure when the MD beneath her saw his chance and got up fast enough to make V unbalanced, he then slammed his cuffs on a nearby pipe hard enough to break them as he turned around and activated his blade arms. V rolled her eyes and did the same as her visor turned into an >< before she started to fight the MD.
Backflipping off Aron and reloading her handgun so fast that the fresh mag went in before the spent one hit the ground the Figure shot the AA12 out of Cole’s hands before he fired and the MP5K out of Gram’s and as each of them saw this they drew knives and attempted to fight the Figure. Holstering the handgun with a stylish spin, she drew a silver kukri that had the unique appearance of the blade looking like it was constantly reforming itself over and over again like it was some kind of anomaly.
“Fascinating….” Gram said as he intensified the grip on his knife.
Wasting no time the two attempted to fight the Figure charging at her from both sides, dodging both of their attacks she grabbed Cole’s arm and spun him around hitting the floor with the floor beneath him cracking it. As this happened Gram attempted to get the figure while she wasn’t looking but she somehow was and elbowed him in the face cracking the helmet’s visor and knocking the Night vision off its mount. Gram however didn’t let up as he used his leg to suddenly kick the figures, making her unstable and slightly loosen her grip on Cole who immediately plunged his knife into the left red eye on her mask.
The figure only staggered backwards as she calmly took out the knife with no blood staining it. “Impressive, but you shouldn’t have done that.” She said,
The figure immediately threw Cole’s knife straight at his gut, spraying blood everywhere as he immediately held it and applied pressure, she then kicked Gram across the hall, slamming into one of the walls making a slight dent as he was knocked unconscious. Aron tried one last time to shoot the figure as he loaded his sidearm, however he was too slow when the figure managed to dodge the first bullet shot and punch Aron’s head into the wall knocking him out like the others. As she looked around to see Uzi aiming her railgun right at her. However Uzi underestimated the figure as she used her powers to try to encase her in some metal. However she was fast and quickly escaped before jumping directly behind her. And as Uzi was about to say BITE ME! The breath coming from her voice box to do so the figure spoke with the same Voicecoder as before. “Did any of these guys ever tell you to not get close to someone with a Melee weapon?” she said letting out a very short maniacal laugh “.... What?” said Uzi But it was too late to recognize her mistake. Reacting quickly the figure put her arm over the railgun aiming it towards the floor, Punching Uzi the the Face with the force to Crack the Visor and splatter Oil onto herself before Elbowing the railgun away from Uzi knocking her back and she stumbled over to the ground. As she looked up she saw the figure aiming her own railgun at her using her elbow to brace it along with shouldering it too.
However V unexpectedly pounced on the figure, knocking her back, the figure looked back to the MD to see him knocked out on the floor with a cracked visor.
“I see you’ve dealt with my friend.” The figure said.
“Your next!” V said with a smile. However before she could do anything the figure expertly flipped them over, causing V to be on the ground and the figure on top.
Before V could do anything else the figure's kukri was at her throat. However then Thad came charging in with the pipe as he screamed in what seemed like a sad attempt at a battle cry.
The figure caught Thad’s pipe before it hit her, she then looked at Thad and said in an annoyed tone. “Civilians….” She then kicked Thad into a nearby wall, making a crack on the wall as Thad slumped down from it, knocked out.
The figure then turned her attention to V and said. “You're lucky you're worth more alive.” She said as she pulled out a pair of what looked to be those MD cuffs and was about to put them on V when suddenly she was knocked off V by a punch.
V looked to her right to see Red standing there shaking off her hand before pulling out her sword.
“Leave. Her. Alone.” Red said.
“About damn time I found you.” The figure said as she got up.
“I’ll deal with her, V, get the others to the medical bay.”
“That’s a stupid idea. I’m staying and fighting with you.” V said in response.
However the figure snapped her fingers, suddenly the MD that jumped into the vents earlier came out now fully regenerated at the figures side.
“Deal with V, I’ll take care of Red.” She said as the MD nodded.
Then the MD charged and tackled V unexpectedly as Red just barely managed to block an attack from the figure with her blade.
Red tried to slice at the figure, however she was faster and dodged out of the way as she went in for her own slice. However it was Red's turn, Red immediately slid to the left and grabbed the figure’s hand holding the knife before allowing the figure.
The figure responded by kicking Red’s legs from under her as she tried to pounce on her. However Red rolled to the side and used her sword to try to slice at the figure, however she barely missed and instead sliced the figure's hand. The figure’s hand bled, however it wasn't normal blood, it was black but not oil. The figure's blood spilled out of her hand before she stopped the bleeding. She looked at her hand and back at Red.
The figure immediately charged at Red however instead of a tackle she threw her kukri at Red, causing Red to grab it midair but leaving her open to the figure then tackling her. She tackled Red into a wall and pinned her to it as she held her kukri to Red’s neck.
“He trained you well. But not good enough, traitor.” The figure said. Just then a bullet shot was heard as the other MD collapsed, injured and holding his side as V put her foot on his core. V then punched the MD on the ground instantly knocking him out.
The figure then said. “I don’t have time for this.” She then picked up Thad’s nearby pipe and threw it at V as she was still reveling in her victory. The pipe hit V and knocked her out immediately.
“Now back to you.” The figure said, turning her head to Red. Red then immediately tried to head but the figure, however she was unsuccessful as the figure used her own momentum and knocked her to the ground. The figure then put her foot on Red’s throat and started to slowly squish it.
“Say goodbye.” The figure said as Red started to have trouble breathing.
Suddenly a voice from down the hall said. “Let her go.”
The figure turned her head to see a man in a white trench coat with a black shirt and pants beneath and a black fedora on his head. Peeking from his hat was what looked like blond hair, he looked relatively skinny.
“I said. Let her go.” He said as he walked closer.
I don’t have time for this.” The figure said now even more annoyed.
The figure got off of Red as she breathed in heavily and held her throat.
The figure ran towards the man as he just stood there with a smile. The figure leaped at the man, however he expertly dodged out of the way causing her to land behind him, she then pulled her kukri out and tried to slash at the man with lightning speed. However he dodged all of them without a problem, all with a smile on his face.
Suddenly he made his first move, grabbing the figure's hand wielding the blade and threw her behind him as he kicked her as hard as he could away from him. She got up instantly and went in for another attack, however she didn’t expect a hard and quick punch by the man directly in the face. This punch was so hard her mask broke off her face. She held her face in what looked like pain. However she kept her right hand blocking her face as she used her left to grab her now broken mask. She then turned around and threw something on the ground that made some type of portal that she immediately leaped through before it dissipated.
The man then went towards Red as she slowly got up with a cough. “Who are you….” Red said out of breath.
V and Thad also got up with a brown as Uzi coughed up some oil, she was dazed as she used her abilities to start regenerating her cracked visor.
“I'm your reinforcements.” The man said as he looked around.
At that moment, Aron, Gram and Cole got up. Cole still held his wound as he staggered up. Aron also got up and took off his helmet as he held his head in pain.
“It looks to me you all need a trip to the medical bay. She kicked your asses.” The man said with a chuckle.
“You didn’t answer my question. Who are you?” Red said, now a little annoyed.
“I’m Dr Alto Clef. That’s at least the version you can pronounce. I'm here with my associate…. If he wasn’t outside.” Clef said.
“Dr Alto Clef…. In the flesh.” Gram said in astonishment.
“Hell ya! I'm a big fan, Clef! I loved that time you killed five reality warpers with an out of date 9mm!” Aron said as his head pain seemed to disappear, or at least he ignored it.
“We’ll i'm glad to see my accomplishments are getting some attention, Shaw owes me five dollars now!” Clef said with a chuckle.
“Wait wait, am I supposed to know who this is?” V said, confused.
“Ya, this is going wayyy too fast for my liking.” Uzi replied her visor now fully healed.
“Ughhhh…. My head….” Thad said as he barely got up holding his head in pain as he tried to force himself to stand up straight. “How can you guys even walk?….”
“Training.” Everyone said in unison.
“Anyway, back to my point! Who are you really?” V said.
“We’ll sweetheart I’m the one and only Dr Clef, hero of the foundation and killer of all things that threaten your very existence.” Clef replied with a wink. V rolled her eyes.
“Wait, weren’t you in a thing with 173 a couple years ago? Why are you suddenly flirting with her?” Aron said, confused.
“He what?!?” Red said now fully wide eyed and surprised. “173!?!??!”
“It’s a long story.” Gram replied with a sigh.
“Ya well it didn’t work out…. Mostly because of this war and the fact that it tried to kill me with everything it had last time I saw it. So now I’m looking for something else to fill that void…. That and the fact that talking to a statue gets boring really fast.” Clef said as he took out a cigarette from his coat, lit it, and smoked it.
“You know doing that will kill you right? It will shorten your lifespan by ten years at least.” Uzi said.
“Not me, I’m fucking immortal.” Clef said casually.
“Your what?” V said, confused.
“I’m immortal. Listen, you don’t make a child with a goddess and not become what is basically a demigod, ok.” Clef said as he smoked another cigarette.
“…. What.” Red said unbelievably confused.
“Long story.” Gram said.
“Well. Anyone want to stop standing here and turn on the generator? If so, follow me.” Clef said as he started to lead the way. “Oh, and you better go to the medical bay.” Clef pointed at Cole who was breathing heavily making sure not to move the knife.
“G-Good point….” Cole said as he walked off.
“Wait, do you even know the way to the generators?” Gram said.
“Of course! He’s Clef!” Aron said excitedly.
“…. Good point.” Gram said with a sigh.
“Fine! I’ll follow him. Get those cuffs on that MD V.” Red said, clearly angry about Clefs presence.
“Thad, you go back, you're not cut out for this.” Uzi said as she patted Thad on the head before she went along with the other’s.
“I figured that out….” Thad said as he wobbled back where he came.
V was grabbing some cuffs and putting them on the MD and cuffing him to a pipe in the wall. However Clef noticed her behind them and said. “Come on, what was your name, V right? The names Clef if you haven’t heard. Ah what am I saying, you’ll be screaming my name later after I’m done.” Clef winked and chuckled to himself.
“If you try to flirt with me again, I’ll personally rip your face off, I’m not interested and never will be, I’m not into humans!” V replied.
“Sheesh, is she always like this?” Clef said.
“You’d be surprised.” Aron said.
N was still running looking for his friends and seemed to stop by the same hallway sixteen times. They all looked the exact same, still carrying his special admirer who seemed to be muttering in her sleep about something, all he could hear in this panic was his name and also something she called a demon.
As N stopped to ponder this, another unfriendly pair of Yellow eyes emerged from the darkness, watching him from the vents as the distant sound of gunfire and the dripping of blood still echoed through the halls, as N kept Pondering and as the MD pounced something he could have never expected what happened next. Fennec lept from N’s hold and onto the MD, her handcuffs shattering as the blue glitched red and a symbol of three lines emerging from an ace of spades glitched red in place of eyes or a MD ><, and as she changed her left armor into her Pincer blades, the MD attempting to parry each strike finding each successful block cracking her blade more and more as she had to step further back without landing a hit on Fennec as she laughed maniacally the laughter causing her mouth to open the standard MD sharp-toothed smile. The kindness and warmth from earlier was gone, replaced by a fury unlike the MD had ever seen even from her own. This was no Angel. This was a demon. And as the MD’s blades finally cracked ‘Fennec’ leapt onto her, knocking the MD to the ground cutting both her lower arms off, splattering oil onto herself as the MD screamed in terror and pain, the demon grabbing at her head with the standard MD Claws, tearing off chunks of her visor and consuming it, oil staining her mouth and then reaching down and starting to tear up her chest. Ripping out some entrails and eating those too, unstable maniacal laughter being interrupted by the consumption of the MD’s insides. Deciding to end it ‘Fennec’ shoved the last tube in her mouth and stabbed the MD in the core and then cut off its head letting the oil from that leak into her mouth and then dropping it, when it stopped leaking oil with a thunk as it hit the ground. As the ace symbol dissipated Fen’s eyes switched back to their normal oval shape and as she looked at herself and the very dead MD on the floor her eyes emptied with fear as she backed up against a wall shaking slightly, starting to hyperventilate as she looked at her oil-stained blades. “L-Let’s never speak of this again….” Fennec said as she looked at N, wiping the oil off her mouth.
“Ok…. I’m very much traumatized!” N said, giving a thumbs up with a forced smile.
With that they continued walking through the halls, suddenly when they turned a corner N and Fennec bumped into the rest of the team, now with Clef.
“HOLY! GET DOWN N!” Yelled Aron as he pointed his gun at Fennec. Gram did the same as the panicked oval eyes filled her face.
“Wanna answer us as to why you're with the MD that tried killing us just a few hours ago!?!?” Uzi said as she pointed her railgun at Fen.
“Wait! S-She’s fine ok? She helped me.” N said as he tried to calm everyone down.
“I highly doubt that.” V said.
“Hey V…. I’ve heard a lot about you!” Fennec said, trying to sound friendly.
“How exactly can we trust her? Give me one reason?” Red said.
“…. She’s not killing us right now? Plus she could’ve killed me while we were alone.” N replied.
Everyone stood still for a few moments.
“We’ll…. Ignoring that…. Oh! Hey guys.” V said. “Have fun?”
“Ughhhhh Yea! Totally!” N said.
“You're obviously hiding something, but I could care less. Anyways, let's get to that generator.” V said.
“What I was thinking.” Red said as she glanced at Clef with suspicion.
“Say, your N right? I’ve heard about you.” Clef said as he looked at N.
“You have?” N asked, confused. “Am I famous!”
“No not at all, I just heard about you from your file. Serial designation N, made by Anderson robotics as a dissemembly drone. Over a hundred confirmed kills. Not a big number compared to V over here.” Clef said with a snicker.
“Oh….” N said now a little sad.
“What about me!” Fennec said. “Am I famous?”
“No, even less than N, I couldn’t even find a file for you.” Clef said.
“Oh….” Fennec said, also sad.
“We should be just a few halls to the containment cells.” Gram said.
“Yea I want this done as soon as possible please.” Uzi said with an eye roll.
“Same.” V said.
“Then stop lollygagging and move!” Red said, now visibly impatient.
As they moved back through the halls, they managed to finally find the now broken doors to the containment cells, they were crooked and looked bent. Inside were two more MD’s, one female and one male. The male one had Jane held against a wall as the female chuckled. The male one had his right arm turned into a blade as he held Jane up with his left, his blade arm was up to her throat. The male MD had the same orange jumpsuits every other MD had and so did the female. The male one had straight black hair while the female had long light brown hair.
Suddenly the female one noticed the team now staring at them. Suddenly the Male grabbed Jane and held her in front of him with his blade to her neck as the female ran behind the male MD and turned her right arm into a submachine gun before pointing it at the team.
“STAY BACK! OR SHE GETS IT!” The male yelled as he held his blade to Jane’s throat. Jane was awake and held her arms to the MD’s blade arm and tried in vain to pull it off her to no avail.
The MTF pulled their weapons and pointed them at the MD’s, Uzi did the same with her railgun as V did the same with her right arm. Clef pulled out his magnum with his right hand and pointed it at the male MD while Red unsheathed her sword and Fen changed her right arm into what seemed to be a modded arm cannon and pointed it at the female one.
“Put it down.” Clef said simply.
“MAKE US!” The female yelled with a chuckle.
“What do you want for her release?” Gram said.
“We want our own freedom!” The male MD yelled.
“I say we just shoot them.” Uzi said as he studied her railgun.
“The chances of hitting Jane are too high, trust me I calculated it.” V replied.
“You sure are fast when it comes to that.” Red said, glancing at V.
“I’m literally a robot, I’ve told you this before.” V replied while Red, looking embarrassed, nodded.
“Let her go tin cans!” Aron yelled.
“MAKE US! FLESH BAG!” The female MD yelled.
Suddenly a bullet shot rang out, however it didn’t come from any of the team, it came from behind the MD’s, the bullet hit the male one directly in the core as he yelled in pain before falling dead. Jane moved quickly to the side. Leaving the female MD in shock.
“I don’t think you're in a position to make demands any more.” Aron said with a smirk.
The female MD then reluctantly turned her arm back to normal and slowly raised her hands as the team moved in closer. Gram immediately placed a pair of the cuffs on the MD as he restrained her tail as well, all with a gun at her core. Jane looked behind her as everyone else did as well. Behind Jane was Lizzy holding a MTF rifle, she immediately put it down as she saw everyone looking at her.
“H-Hey guys.” She said.
“Gram, get that WD and MD under control.” Clef said.
“Didn’t expect to see you here.” Jane said. “I also noticed your new friend.”
“To answer your first question, no one truly does. To answer your second question, she kinda just decided to tag along.” Clef replied.
“You two know each other?” Uzi said.
“Yep, I was stationed at site 19 while Clef was there, mostly to decommission another reality warper.” Jane replied. “Anyway enough about him, where’s my rifle?”
“I have no idea.” N said with a shrug.
“Oh I know! You left in the habitation sector thing!” Fennec said.
“Huh, we’ll anyway get this generator back on and make sure the area is secured.” Jane said.
“I’m getting something near the colony exit, looked like three MD’s, the last ones by the looks of it.” Gram said as he showed his iPad. He had cuffed the female MD to a nearby wall.
“We'll need to go and stop them now are we?” Aron said.
“Yep, follow me I know a shortcut!” Uzi yelled as she ran out with everyone following her.
Meanwhile back at the exit of the colony, a couple MD’s were just starting to get to the exit, they stole a keycard off a dead foundation guard a few halls ago, and now had access to the door.
“Finally! Even if the sun is out I’ll be happy to actually see it again!” One said.
“Don’t get your hopes up, there could still be guards.” Another said.
“We’ll just fly off, no worries.” The third one replied.
“Oh right!” The other said a chuckle as he swiped the card on the door.
However instead of the cold welcoming of the outside, they instead were met by a man wearing a lab coat, he had a red amulet around his neck and smirked as he held a large gun labeled, ‘Micro HID’.
“What, says the dead guys?” The man said.
“What-“ The MD’s said at once before suddenly with a burst of energy from the Micro they were all disintegrated.
Just then the others got to the exit to see a pile of ash next to the man.
“Oh, hey Clef!” The man said as he waved. He had ginger hair, black eyes, white skin, and a small stubble beard that was barely noticeable.
“Dr Elias Shaw, what are you doing here?” Jane said.
“Ahh nothing! I was sent here for the same reason as Clef!” Shaw said.
“Wait wait wait, who are you?” Uzi said.
“Ya I’m confused.” N replied.
“I’ve lost the capacity to be confused.” V said.
“Same here.” Red said.
“Oh! I haven’t introduced myself! Sorry. I’m Dr Elias Shaw! At least that’s what my new name is! We don’t talk about my old name….” Shaw said.
“What was your old name?” Uzi asked.
“Dr Bri-“ Clef started before Shaw shushed him.
“Nope! I do not want to even mention that name!” Shaw said.
“Anyway…. All you need to know is that I’m immortal with this amulet, bla bla bla. Let’s get to working now!” Shaw said as Clef smirked.
“Wait what.” Uzi said.
“Best not to question it.” Aron replied. “That’s the best way to deal with Shaw.”

I’m curious if anyone else is experiencing something similar this allergy season. I take Singulair and generic Zyrtec daily to control my asthma and allergies, but lately I’ve been adding Allegra and the occasional Mucinex to help with the really bad pollen days. I’ve noticed my asthma has gotten exceedingly worse in the past two weeks, so much so that I’m using my rescue inhaler (1 puff at a time) 4-5x per day. Obviously that’s not ideal, so I went to urgent care today and was prescribed 50mg/5 days of prednisone.
Has anyone else had a dose this high and did it help? I’m feeling really scared and overwhelmed with how bad my symptoms have been, and just hoping the pollen relents soon. Any advice would be great!

Throwaway acct because I genuinely don’t know what to do anymore. So me and my fiancé are both in our early twenties and have been together since high school. We’ve been through an insane amount of stuff together and I feel like that has made our relationship stronger. We used to have fights and eventually be able to work through it, until now. It seems that we’ve been fighting very often with zero resolutions lately. Part of my problem with it is that I dissociate when people raise their voice or get mad at me and can’t respond half the time. That makes her more mad. It also seems like these fights are always accompanied with drinking. She tends to use alcohol as a coping mechanism, I don’t blame her for this but I don’t know how to handle it when she drinks and starts yelling at me. It seems like the next morning it never gets worked through and I just have to hope it won’t happen again. Last night was one of those nights. She was like “do you want me to be really honest with you”? And started tearing into me about how she is unsatisfied with our sex life in particular. Her exact words at one point were “you can’t even do that right”. It’s genuinely like she becomes a different person when this happens. I’m starting to feel like I genuinely am the problem. She’ll tell me how she’s feeling but in a very aggressive way so I will tell her that I can’t hear what she’s trying to tell me when she’s making me feel bad too and she says that makes her feel unheard and like I don’t care. I always end up crying after the yelling and it feels manipulative for me to do that because I’m trying to hear her feelings but she can be so mean about it I can’t help but feel hurt. I just don’t know what to do anymore. It feels like every move I make is wrong and the more I try the worse it gets. I love her so much and I want to be with her I just don’t know how to fix all these problems. She says she’s changed so much for me but that I won’t do the same for her. Am I in the wrong?

Here is chapter 14 of Tight Money.
Special thanks to u/SpacePaladin15 for creating the universe and allowing fan writers to join the fun.
Additional thanks to u/BiasMushroom, u/YakiTapioca, u/cruisingNW, u/SavingsSyllabub7788, u/YaaliAnnar, u/White_Dragon_Coranth, u/Illwood and u/Redundant-Honse for letting me use elements from their fanfics in mine.
Leena and Dani finish the dinner with with the parents and we get a quick look into how things are going on Venlil Prime.
Thanks to u/Saint-Andros, u/cruisingNW and blankxlate for proofreading this chapter.
I love your comments so please tell me what you think so I can get better or if you have suggestions for future snippets of life on Venlil Prime you would like to see me cover, leave it in the comments.
First Previous
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Memory transcription subject: Liara, Prime News Reporter
Date [standardized human time]: November 3, 2136
My prompter counted down as my stage lights brightened, and I watched the camera light go live.
I took a deep breath and began the interview, “From Prime News, it’s ‘How I Built This,’ the show that dives deep into the stories of remarkable entrepreneurs and their journey to success. I’m Liara Raz and on today's show: how Ricardo Mota Esparza and Vye turned their small machine shop into a life saving business and helped reconnect Venlil Prime with its industrial past.”
Kotaka pointed right, and I followed him to Camera Two.
“A few days ago, my ear trimmer broke. Not a big deal, I’ve had it for ages and it served me well. When I went to the store to get a new one… nothing. There wasn’t a single trimmer to be found. I tried to order one with the same result.”
I watched a few tails of the audience swaying in agreement, it seems that trimmer comparison landed! I’ll need to give the writer a fruit bowl sometime.
Back to Camera One, “As I looked into the reason, it turned out that we got all of our small motors from Fahl and with the border closed for trade, we didn’t have the ability to make our own small motors. We know how to make these motors, but we don’t have the machines to manufacture them. And with fabricators in short supply, I, like so many of you, have had to go back to using scissors.”
Ears back, flick the tail. They are just as unhappy as you.
“Today, we have a special guest joining us in the studio who is helping to change that. Please welcome Ricardo Mota Esparza, the co-founder of Predator Parts Machine Shop on Venlil Prime. Ricardo, it's a pleasure to have you here.”
Quickly switching to a positive affect, I turned my attention to the man sitting across from me in the studio. Following Talen’s example, the studio had positioned the chairs to face each other instead of the camera. I had thought the human would be covered in oil and stained pelts but his clean appearance showed I still needed to work on my own biases.
He wore a tight, light green chest-pelt that traveled down the length of his arms, only revealing the caramel skin of his hands. There was an outline in the pocket on his chest pelt where he had stashed a small data pad. Below that, the human also wore dark blue coverings that stretched all the way down that ended just above his feet, which were dressed with foot coverings of a golden yellow color of which contrasted harshly against the drab interior of the studio.
“Just ‘Rocky’ please. And thank you, Liara, for having me. It's an honor to be on your show.”
Good, let’s keep this relaxed and show everyone there is nothing to fear. Rocky had a deeper voice than any other interview subject I had met before, but there was a light airiness about his vocalization that was quite pleasant.
He took our pre-broadcast rehearsal well. He smiled through closed lips, careful not to show his flesh-tearering fangs. His movements were slower than they had been when he arrived; his hands gesticulating with every word. This might be easier than I thought.
“Rocky, let's start from the beginning. You were a machine shop worker on Earth when you joined the exchange program, correct? What was your first impression of your partner Vye?”
Rocky started moving his arms as he spoke and it was mesmerizing to watch his body language despite my inability to comprehend any of it. Without a tail, it made sense that humans would come up with another solution, I just didn’t expect it to be so… beautiful.
It’s like I’m watching a master Strayu chef kneading fresh dough; or a conductor directing an orchestra.
“Oh, we hit it off right away. We shared a lot of interests and talked about everything under the sun. Vye was working for a fabrication shop as an apprentice when he signed up to meet me in person. We had a great time on Station 2 and we tried to maintain contact after the program as well. When news that the Federation had started assembling ships to attack Earth, I was on one of the first flights to Venlil Prime.”
“I imagine it must have been hard to leave everything behind you and flee here. Can you tell us a bit about those difficult times?”
Please don’t say anything violent. Just stick to the talking points and you will be fine.
“I would rather not discuss that. Like most people, I lost loved ones and everything I had built when it was all destroyed by the Federation, but Vye was there for me from the moment I landed.”
I tried to keep my tail from curling, this was going more smoothly than nearly half of my past interviews! Just like we rehearsed, he skipped over the messy details and dived right into their industry.
“Vye encouraged me to find a new purpose and start anew. He is a crazy guy and wicked smart. He realized what was happening with the machines after Federation borders closed and trade was cut off. He had been working on establishing his own shop before I arrived, and needed an extra set of hands. Working with Vye gave me… focus. Focus enough to help me through everything.”
Lucky guy. Whew, okay, the hard part’s over.
“That's truly inspiring, Rocky. So, how did you and your business partner go about setting up your machine shop on Venlil Prime?”
“Initially, Vye and I tried to secure funding and supplies from the UN embassy, but the bureaucracy proved challenging. We then decided to approach the Venlil Government directly, explaining our vision to help both humans and Venlil who lost their jobs due to closed borders and Federation attack. They agreed to provide two old fabricators and a small grant to kickstart our venture very quickly.”
“That's remarkable! By bridging the gap between humans and Venlil, you not only found support but also a mutually beneficial collaboration. How did it all begin?”
Come on, you are doing great! Remember to highlight humans and venlil working together.
“With the fabricators, Vye and I started manufacturing parts for another brand-new fabricator while we advertised our services with flyers and ads on Bleat. Our first client was a farmer who was on the brink of losing his harvest due to broken harvester drones. He took a chance on us, and we delivered quality parts in just a couple paws.”
Excellent answer. Rocky adjusted himself in his seat and I knew he didn’t mean to, but it was clear just how strong he was as his muscles flexed underneath his tight chest-pelt. He looked at me expectantly, reminding me I needed to ask the next question.
Glancing at my list, I prompted him, “It sounds like your dedication to quality and timely service quickly gained attention. How did your business grow from there and who came up with the name for your business?”
That wasn’t in the talking points! Why did I ask that? Speh! I had to make a conscious effort to control my tail and ears so as not to give away my mistake.
“I knew you were going to ask about that. It’s stupid. Vye and I couldn’t decide on which name to use, so we each picked our favorites and then we flipped a coin. Vye won so we named the shop Predator Parts Machine Shop.”
“The name was Vye’s idea?”
Thank the sun and stars, Rocky I could nuzzle you. You really saved my hide with that answer.
“Yeah, he wanted to stand out from other shops and create a brand. A deal’s a deal so he got to pick the name. Word spread within the farming communities about our affordable, high-quality results. We hired more workers, both experienced and untrained, to keep up with demand. Within three weeks, we rented out the rest of the building and started training human refugees as mechanics and repairmen.”
“It's incredible how you turned adversity into opportunity, Rocky. What motivated you to empower unemployed venlil and human refugees, and help them rebuild their lives after all the turmoil that has happened since first contact?”
Rocky’s eye fur rose and he looked to his side, up and away from the camera. I had seen many humans do this when they were thinking. It was a cute quirk. For how dangerous they were supposed to be, they seemed like children in some ways.
“After the Federation's attack on Earth, many of us humans were left with nothing to return to and venlil were still hurting from the Federation’s decision to cut off all trade. It was a chance for us to come together, learn from one another, and create a new future. We hired Venlil workers to train humans in fixing common equipment, fostering a sense of unity and shared purpose.”
“Your story is truly inspiring, Rocky. However, I understand that there have been some challenges along the way. Could you share a recent incident that reflects the lingering fear some still have towards humans?”
Now to drive it home. Rocky sat up and intertwined his digits in front of him as I asked my question.
“Certainly, Liara. Just this morning when I was covering for our receptionist, I received a phone call at our office from the Capitol Spaceport. The caller hung up as soon as I answered and ignored my call back. I had to contact Mr. Cass at the main office in the Capitol Spaceport to find out that their fabricators are broken. It's a reminder that despite the progress we've made, there are still people who harbor fear and uncertainty.”
Bunch of morons stuck in the past and holding the herd back.
“It's disheartening to hear that some remain fearful, but your efforts are undoubtedly making a difference. Looking back on your journey, what are your reflections, Rocky?”
Now let's finish strong.
“The path we've walked has been challenging, but it has also been rewarding beyond measure. We’ve built a thriving business, repaired machines of all kinds, and provided employment opportunities to those in need. Our customers are mostly welcoming and appreciative, but there is still work to be done in breaking down barriers and fostering understanding.”
“Rocky, your story serves as a powerful reminder of the resilience of the human spirit and the transformative power of unity. Thank you for sharing your journey with us today.”
“Thank you, Liara. It was a pleasure being here and sharing my story.”
“And that concludes our interview with Rocky Mota Esparza, one of the remarkable entrepreneurs behind a thriving machine shop on Venlil Prime. Join us next time on ‘How I Built This’ as we uncover more extraordinary stories of innovation and determination. Until then, stay inspired and keep building. Goodbye!”
Memory transcription subject: Leena, Human Refugee Host
Date [standardized human time]: November 6, 2136
“Leena, your father and I were worried when you said that you found someone and moved in together so quickly but now that we have met her, we are happy that you have found another mate.” My mother flicked her tail and waved her ears in an outpouring of support.
But I was floored. Mate? They thought that we were together? I bloomed intensely, the heat radiating from my face felt like a furnace. Dani’s eyes widened, her reddening expression betraying a mix of shock and confusion; and was that a smile on her face?
Dad swayed his tail warmly, “We understand how most people are concerning humans but you don’t need to worry about that from us. We are your parents and we love you no matter what, and we are happy to meet the pr-... the human who captured our daughter’s heart.”
Mom followed up without skipping a beat.
"We've noticed how close you and Dani have become and we are happy for you but we are a bit concerned that you didn’t tell us you were being pursued by anyone."
I don’t know what was more difficult to process, the incorrect belief that we were a mated pair, the joy and support I was getting from my parents, or Dani’s stifled laughter at the whole situation. Captured my heart? Being Pursued? Had they rehearsed this?
“What? No, Mom, we're not... I mean, we're just… she’s…”
I stumbled, trying to find the right words to clarify the situation. I stole a nervous glance at Dani, looking for a lifeline and finding none, before turning back to mother.
Mom continued with her ears facing me, "Leena, your father and I were the same way. We knew we were soul mates the moment we met! We moved in together only a few [months] later; we understand the whirlwind of romance. You’re a grown woman and we’re so proud of you.”
Not to be outdone, Dad added his own thoughts.
“You’re moving much faster than we did, but we are happy you two are starting a life together! And the way Dani loves your children, it seems like they have built a real relationship of trust despite the… differences.”
I flicked my tail in confirmation. "Yes, she's been wonderful with them. They've grown fond of her in just a few days, and she's been like family with m- with them bu…"
Dani couldn’t help herself, she had to make things worse, the opportunity must have been irresistible.
"Oh, Leena, my love, you're making me blush!"
She closed one eye quickly while she looked at me, enjoying the lightheartedness of the moment with a gentle smile, but she didn’t seem to understand what my parents meant. Before I could respond to her jest, Dad leaned forward, his eyes gleaming with excitement.
"Dani, you know this isn’t the first time Leena has tried to keep a secret from us. When…”
Sun and stars I know what he is going to say, “Dad, please!”
“...she was 6, she met a boy in school and they became fast friends. Well, being as young as they were they thought that nuzzling meant they were a mated pair, so Leena comes home and asks us how to make a Vyalkit. We told her how we made ours and the next day, she and the boy were shaved so close you might have thought they were applying to become exterminators!”
Dad loved that story, he told everyone he could, but it was never any less embarrassing.
“Needless to say, her secret ‘husband’ didn’t stay a secret for long and we set her straight.”
Mother turned her gaze on me, moving her ears in sympathy, but I saw how her tail swayed during dads retelling.
“You don’t need to keep your relationship a secret from us. We know how other people feel about humans. Just know that we don’t care that she is a woman, that she isn’t a venlil or even that she’s a predator. We just want you to be happy.”
Dani's laughter escaped her control, and she erupted into a fit of giggles. I couldn’t resist her infectious laughter. She was too full of joy in the face of what was one of my most embarrassing moments so I picked up a soft toy and playfully threw it at her, hitting her square in the head to my surprise.
"Okay, okay, I confess, " Dani managed between laughs. "Leena and I are secretly in love, and we're announcing our relationship tonight."
My eyes widened, a mixture of surprise, embarrassment, amusement and horror.
"Dani!" I bleated helplessly.
Mom and Dad exchanged glances, their tails swaying faster.
"Oh, Leena," Mom said, her voice filled with joy, "we're so happy for you. Love knows no boundaries, and we accept your human mate with open arms."
My ears fell flat against my skull, and all I could do was stammer. "But... but we're not..."
Dani burst into uncontrollable laughter before I could finish the sentence. My eyes narrowed, and I threw another soft toy at her in defiance.
"I can't believe you!" I exclaimed, my voice laced with both amusement and annoyance. "You're enjoying this way too much."
Dani wiped away tears of laughter, finally gaining control of herself. "I'm sorry, Leena. It was just too funny not to go along with it for a moment."
"You're terrible, Dani!"
Taking a deep breath to regain composure and control, I put both paws on the table.
"Dad, Mom, let me explain. You see, after Dani saved Tas and Vissa following the stampede, I didn't mention her because I hadn't seen her since we met at the hospital. When Governor Tarva made her announcement, I went to the park with Tas and Vissa to get some air, and that is when we met again. We talked and since she needed a place to stay, we agreed we could help each other.”
My eyes fell towards the table, embarrassment coloring my features again. “I'm sorry I didn't tell you she moved in sooner. I've been preoccupied with finding work and money troubles. We’ve become friends, and she offered to rent the spare room to help me financially."
Amidst Dani’s laughter, Mom and Dad shared a puzzled look, their excitement dying down. Dad spoke up first, his voice filled with curiosity.
"Wait, you mean... you and Dani are not in a relationship?"
Dani shook her head, “No, I’m just renting the spare room. I love children and without a job right now, I have lots of time to help Leena. There is nothing going on between us.”
My mother’s blush brightened slightly as she realized her mistake. "O-Oh, we misinterpreted the situation, I apologize. But we're still happy that you've met someone like Dani, Leena. It seems she's been a wonderful presence in both your life and the childrens’."
I looked at my mother with my ears perking up. She looked at me lovingly, expressing genuine joy through her features.
"Yes! I appreciate your understanding. Dani truly has been amazing but we are only friends, nothing more."
"Darling, we're sorry for jumping to conclusions. We love you, no matter what. Whether you find love with a venlil or a human, we just want you to be happy."
I couldn’t help it when my blush deepened, feeling a mixture of love and appreciation for my parents over their proclamation of support.
My father smiled warmly, "Well Dani, thank you very much for being a supportive friend to our Leena. I apologize for our confusion." He chuckled guiltily.
She nodded at him with a smile on her face. This turned out better than I had hoped given the start of the meal! The tension melted away as the confusion and mistakes were cleared up.
"Thank you, Dad, Mom. I'm grateful for your understanding."
Mom placed her paws onto both mine and Dani's, her gaze filled with love. "Leena, we love you no matter what. If you ever find someone who truly makes you happy, regardless of their species or gender, we will support you."
I was overcome with gratitude and pride in my parents, my tail swayed back and forth, "All of your support means the world to me."
Dani added her own reassurances and I hoped she wasn’t too upset with me throwing things at her.
"Leena, you have a wonderful family." Dani admitted.
The room filled with a sense of joy and relief, and laughter slowly replaced the tension. The misunderstanding had been cleared, and we enjoyed the rest of the claw after the humorous mix-up. During the rest of the meal, I stole quick glances at Dani. I felt a mixture of gratitude, concern and something else that I couldn’t quite describe. She was so full of life and joy and understanding.
Later while lying in bed and reflecting on the conversation we had during the meal, I didn’t know how she could be so happy after her world had been attacked, and everything she knew and loved was destroyed. I had been mortified with how things went during the meal at the moment but she just laughed and made light of it all.
Thank you Solgalick.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
First Previous

I’m a 19 year old male in college, and my acne has been bothering me all year. It started getting worse and worse, and about 2 months ago, I started to change my whole lifestyle up in order to try and cure it. I literally eat insanely healthy (real Whole Foods, no seed oils, no inflammatory foods, high protein and high fiber with tons of pre and probiotics) 90% of the time whenever I can, I simplified my skin care, I made at home changes with the detergent I use, products I use, etc… but my acne just keeps flaring up and breaking out. I will say that my skin is very healthy minus the acne, as it has a good glow and is very smooth, but then my face just has acne, whiteheads and flare ups, and they keep getting worse! What can I even do at this point? I’m thinking about hopping on tretinoin but I’m scared of the Purge as my skin is already constantly breaking out in new places that I never had problems at before.
It’s really messing with my lifestyle, as I hardly go out any more because of the fear of the consequences my skin will face if I even try to do age appropriate activities with my friends. Any one been in this spot before? Will it get better if I just keep sticking to it?

So for a... rather delayed campaign I've come up with a few factions which I want to involve in a campaign. Its a sandbox game with factions competing in the area that the party might have a chance to work with or fight against. I've a couple of core ones and a range of other ideas but I'm aware at this point I should probably be cutting some. So i thought I'd throw this out there and get some advice as to what people thought was most interesting and what people thought should either be entirely discarded or at least moved to a back burner.
For a quick setting overview i'm going with some of the classic clash of order and freedom type of thing borrowing some ideas from things like Dark Sun and Mesopotamian history as inspiration. Broadly this part of the continent has most of its agricultural land focused around the coasts and some river systems that extend into the interior of the continent, most of this agricultural land is ruled by powerful city states dominated by Draconic King. Beyond this the lands surrounding it are largely arid, plant life only briefly able to flourish in the wet season as wadis fill for a time, the lands and people here often wild. Go far enough north and you hit a region of hills and mountains of a different but equally harsh nature most often.
So 2 factions which are must haves
Meshant
The closest of the great city states to the starting area, ruled by a powerful Blue Dragon named Ukrik'Azahim'Mli and with a satellite town called Oulm'Aki being a possible starting/hub location, a modest town sitting at the edge of a minor tributaries of the larger river upon with Meshant sits. As with many of the great dragon city states slavery is common here, order is often enforced ruthlessly and the society is extremely hierarchical, with a small clique of wealthy nobles (most of whom are dragonborn) at the top and a large number of slaves and poorer subjects at the bottom of the pile. However, it represents a place of socio-economic complexity, that embraces long distance trade. Ukrik'Azahim'Mli is also quite a capable ruler, he's been fairly good at fending off the attempts of rivals to conquer his lands and has earned wealth for his city through wars, his court is a centre of learning regarding the magical and mundane, as well as being a patron of the arts. His legal system may provide broad powers when dealing with those accused of crimes against those of a higher station but the great storm dragon does still value something approaching rule of law. And if you are someone who values things like trade and literacy it is Meshant that will further such things. For an adventurer who seeks wealth and prestige the forces of Meshant are also perhaps the best resourced to offer such things.
Here in Ouim'Aki, the governor Amar-Suen is the governor of a town at the edge of the city's zone of control, the river that connects them navigable in the wetter parts of the year but not always easy and safe to traverse with Ouim'Aki sitting on the north shore of a marshy lake in the wet season as water collects from nearby areas, the river flowing out to the south and joins the flow of a larger river at Meshant. Meanwhile with a new campaigning season likely to begin it is likely the king will bring his power southwards to wage war on his neighbouring monarchs meaning although Meshant is the greatest power in this region not all of its resources will be focuses here.
The Hatussa
The Hatussa describe a loose, fluid group of desert nomads that live in this area, their population is made up of a fair mixture of desert elves along with humans, half elves and a smattering of other races. The people of the cities would call them barbarians, surviving off pastoralism, hunting and gathering as they move across the landscape in small groups rather than farming, having no knowledge of writing and with the concept of law being nothing more than a group of loose shared norms, the enforcement of which is not the monopoly of any king, judge or their men. Those of the city might describe them as untrustworthy, at one time happy to do trade and at another to engage in banditry and raiding. The deserts they live in can often be tough places, low on water in many parts of the year and even at the best of times wild monsters and dangerous beasts are not uncommon. However they are lovers of freedom, decisions are often made by consensus among groups, leaders often chosen only for a specific purpose such as conducting a raid or a negotiation, their lose political structure lacking many of the traditional facets of state structure such as taxation and a monopoly on the use of force.
But I have some other ideas for factions and I'm debating which I might also include.
The Nethaniah
For generations the valley dwarfs have lived as slaves or poor lower class workers in the realms of the Draconic Kings. The Nethaniah are a local group focused on the liberation of of the Valley Dwarfs in particular and perhaps abolition more broadly, hoping to either rebel against the King of Meshant and free perhaps Oulm'Aki or else take as many of their people as possible and find somewhere to free. On their own however they know they lack the strength to have much chance of taking Meshant on. They are known for including warriors highly skilled using simple weapons and in unarmed combat but some are also said to turn to darker powers seeking stranger abilities. They are quite willing to be ruthless in their goals, carrying out assassinations and the like to undermine the power of the Draconic Masters in Oulm'Aki, although they are not blind to the suffering of slaves of other races they still tend to prioritise freeing their own people
The Sleepless Dreamers A group of former supporters of the old king of Meshant, Uzi'Isbi'Imi, who have fled into the deep desert along with the bones of the dead Brass Dragon. Since then they have been trying to find a way to bring her back to life or perhaps unlife. So far they have yet to be successful but in order to continue their work in that desolate place many have successfully turned themselves undead and raised undead servants. The old King was probably a better person than the current Ukrik'Azahim'Mli, if a less capable general, but the means that their followers would go to to return them are... disturbing.
The Cult of Kamosh Another internal rebellion group but this one largely led by humans. Focused around a secret religious movement focused around the dragon slaying god Kamosh they blame a lot of the woes of the world on the Dragons and their servants, their vision of liberation has little room for Dragons, Dragonborn, Kobolds and the worship of the Draconic gods in any area they may manage to liberate. The local cult is eager to rebel in Oulm'Aki and take control of it but at the present will need more resources or more allies to do so.
The Naram League As the name suggests this is a small group of villages and a town who are roughly organised around an alliance to a young copper dragon Naram'Dalu. These settlements are organised in a small ridgeline of hills much to the east where slightly higher rains and something of an aquifer allows them to survive in an area that is arid but a little more liveable than the surrounding desert. Their remoteness and small size has meant Meshant has generally had bigger fish to fry but both sides well know that they may one day turn on them and try to conquer them. Currently they have an awkward relationship with Meshant where they are willing to pay a small, largely symbolic tribute to the great city in order to secure their peace and a trade. Naram'Dalu is much less intentionally brutal than some of the draconic kings but this local lord would still much rather spend his time partying than dedicating himself to working hard to benefit his people.
The Yamna An nomadic tribe come from across the mountains that were driven south by bad weather increasing competition for resources in the far north a few years ago, the Yamna are a group forged around an orc core but they care more for strength than for lineage, any who prove their capability may join the tribe and as such they have a fair few people from other races mixed into their group. In recent years the Yamna spent some time providing mercenaries for Meshant, but two years ago during a difficult campaign against rival cities in the south their relationship shattered, both sides claimed the other more or less betrayed them. Now the broader tribe has been scattered into its component familial groups, many of which have come to this region with their carts looking for pasture for their cattle during the wetter parts of the year. With the drier season approaching though the future of the tribe is yet to be decided, will they be united under a new leader or remain scattered, will they try to return to the steppe beyond the mountains, will they try to carve out a place here by force with raiding and seizing land, will the establish relationships with local powers through trade, alliance and mercenary work to ensure they have means to keep their cattle from starving.
The following are more minor factions, they will probably only come up under certain circumstances, i'm less likely to create hooks to allow players to actually join them with their purpose more to be mainly either possible allies for a faction the PCs might join or factions mainly there to be antagonists.
Clan Jerahmal A dwarven mountain clan north the local region, the closest such of the clans that dot the mountains and jungle hills. They have no love for the dragons and heir servants and feel a certain kinship towards their cousins enslaved and otherwise oppressed by the whip of Meshant, despite some considerable religious differences, but it is likely to take a fair amount of persuading to get them to leave their fortified settlements in the hills and mountain and march upon the plains. Many in the towns and cities view the mountain clans as terrible isolated and superstitious, given their aversion to arcane arts and culture of ritual cleanliness, but their access to iron is both shrouded in mystery much envied and sort after given the lowlanders can only work meteoric iron. I'm debating whether to have some goliath either folded in as part of the clan's structure or as a separate but allied group in the same general region.
An-Nesa The marshy lake near Ouim'Aki in the wet season is a maze of reeds, deep channels of water and banks of mud. In the dry season it still retains a degree of folliage due to soil moisture but much less is navigable by boat, land navigation is still difficult as many areas have only a thin layer of hardened material baked on the surface which can break to reveal much softer mud and silt beneath. Half submerged in this is the ruins of an old settlement called Nesa, its inhabitants, the An-Nesa are a tribe of lizardfolk primarily (and a small number of those such as black dragonborn), they are known to hunt and fish in the area, as well as sometimes carry out a basic form of flood agriculture, but the An-Nesa are well known to often supplement this with raiding and piracy, which they seem to consider much the same as hunting, often targeting shipments that might contain food and fishing boats, not afraid to eat those they have slain to. Meshant would like to see these destroyed, or at least beaten back until they are no longer so great a threat. The marsh has made it somewhat difficult but the forces of Meshant would certainly consider operations to kill and enslave the lizardfolk when the chance arises.
Halfling Merchants River halflings are well known across much of this part of the continent and the bands of water traders and land caravans they use are well known in this region for their work. While some may regard them as not entirely trustworthy they do represent an extremely useful middleman for many groups, willing to buy goods from a party and sell them on to people who might have serious trust issues dealing directly. Their capability at navigation and willingness to take the risks involved in such journeys allows for a certain risk reward benefit for them to.
Araxes Serving as possible ally for the Hatussa these will probably only come up if the players choose to ally with Hatussa and seek allies or perhaps the odd random encounter with them. The Araxes are a loose group of Aarakocra in he region, they are known to travel long distances as the seasons change, largely practicing a hunter gatherer life style while the rains keep the low lands richer in resources they may well remain to exploit them before returning much further north as they steadily dry out in the coming months. In many regards they have a spirit not unlike the Hatussa in their love for freedom and willingness to act in a fluid and flexible manner, as such they may well serve as valuable allies should the Hatussa decide to go for a major attempt at waging a war in the area.
The Kukan Another faction that will probably be mainly just antagonists. They are a tribal group of goblins living in the east of the region not so far from the league of Naram although some smaller groups are well known to come west seeking chances to raid and the like. Their relationship with Meshant is particularly poor, they largely regard the goblins as pests who are barely people and will kill or enslave any they find without hesitation. Their relationship with other factions is perhaps not as immediately antagonistic but few have much love for them given the Kukan have a reputation for treachery and cruelty.

Karma Sett

There's been a lot of conversation around this deck, and it's been ending up deep in the weeds with questionable takes. There's been some unsuccessful attempts to wrap up the conversation, and while I'm not nearly egotistical enough to think I can bring everyone together in agreement, I did think I could get the conversation to a more useful place.

Who are you and why should I listen to you?

I'm a consistent high masters player who's been playing LoR since around monuments of power, and CCGs generally for close to two decades. I've had a lot of ladder success in LoR, and plenty tournament success on top of that:
https://twitter.com/PlayRuneterra/status/1657906098148622336/photo/3
In respect to Karma Sett specifically, I am a good pilot of the deck. I've played it off and on for a few seasons, I doubt I am the literal best pilot, but I'm not bad at it. I played it to the referenced win, in both open rounds and top cut, I've played many games with it, and many games against it.

Is Karma Sett Broken/OP?

No.
There's a lot of takes that Karma Sett is wildly overpowered and suppressing wide swathes of the meta, and this is just false.
The deck mostly floats around 52-53% winrate, with a moderate play rate. Certainly nothing bad, but a far cry from actually overpowered and centralizing decks that usually put up numbers over 55%. Particularly with the level of playrate these decks have, a 2 or 3 percentage point difference is massive. Decks like Fizz Samira, and Tristana decks DEFINED their meta, every deck was evaluated in its relation to those two decks, Karma Sett was simply a deck in the meta that you could justifiably play.
The prior meta was no different, with a variety of Samira decks absolutely running over the meta, and karma sett simply existing as a playable option.
The deck could certainly be broken at some point in the future, but as of right now it's just been one of many decks that are good but nothing special.

What is the Issue with Karma Sett?

It's exceptionally frustrating to play against for a lot of the playerbase.
There are a few things that I see as the source of this issue.

• Brews tend to not convincingly end games

Generally when people are playing novel ideas, they have enough interaction, and value. The most frequent problem off meta, or just unoptimized decks have is they aren't actually good at converting an advantage into a win.
Strong decks will get an advantage and put you six feet in the ground the very next turn. If you are excited to play a novel deck, and hit Karma Sett, you frequently will not have the closing power Karma Sett demands of you.

• People generally prefer slower value decks

Look at how frequently people ask for the Fangs to be buffed. The community generally likes decks that slowly play for value over multiple turns. These decks invariably get blasted by Karma Sett as if the game goes to turn 10, Karma will be playing 5 or more effective cards a turn, and upwards of twenty effective mana every turn. There isn't a value engine in the game that will keep up with that.

• You must play highly proactively against Karma Sett

People don't like putting themselves out there. This has nothing to do with CCGs, and is just people mostly disliking risk. Playing against Karma Sett is fairly tricky, and it is always you who is expected to dictate how the game is going. You must always make the first move.
Overall, Karma Sett is a deck that makes people play in a way that is rather unpleasant, while specifically bullying a lot of fan favorite concepts. The deck is extremely well set up to generate frustration.

How do I beat Karma Sett?

Pressure, Demacia and generally targeting a win on turn 9.
Karma Sett has an insane power spike at turn 10, but very little scaling prior to that, generally you are free to set up from turns 1-8 building to an unbeatable turn 9 attempt. They do have interaction, but it is quite poor and limited by the specific flavor of Karma.
PnZ is reasonably good at killing small units, but struggles against anything slightly larger, Ranger-knight defector is hilariously difficult to answer for them, typically demanding a hexbliterator alone.
Targon is much better at killing chunky units in the midgame, but can't answer wide boards of cheap units to even a passable degree.
Rushing into the win isn't a good plan, you have time to use so take it!
Making a plan to win the game any later than open attack on turn 10 will not work, you are essentially gambling that your opponent hasn't found karma, and they will have.
Killing karma is not going to work, stop even considering that as an option, even pre turn 10 don't think about holding up removal, Level 1 karma is such an unbelievable waste of mana that unless it is their only option, they won't play her, and if it is their only option, you probably shouldn't care.
No matter how slow and greedy your deck is, you will lose to karma + place your bets, you are the aggro in this game. Aurelion Sol + Viego? You better be slamming Hydravine on 7 and trying to get them dead.
If your deck is incapable of winning the game before turn 10 in any reasonable way against Karma Sett, you will not beat it, and you need to make your peace with that reality. That doesn't make your deck unviable, Nasus Vaults of Helia was in essentially that situation and still managed to be a force in the meta of the back of other favorable matchups.
I strongly recommend just conceding when you're lost. Playing out the game against Karma is only going to dumpster your mental state and you're still going to lose.

Should Karma Sett be nerfed?

Yes.
As much as card games love to pretend to be purely rational beings operating off logic alone, we are not homo economicus. Balance can and should have a goal of public relations. In fact balance shouldn't even care if a deck is objectively overpowered except as it impacts public relations.
If a deck is wildly broken, but the vast majority of players enjoy playing with and against it, you shouldn't nerf it. The sole point of a game is to be fun, if your players are having fun, who cares if its objectively poorly balanced. Your players could certainly STOP enjoying the format if it stays poorly balanced for a long period of time, but while they enjoy it, definitely don't step in and interfere because of some objective metric.
The opposite situation is what's going on with Karma Sett, any objective metric you look at tells you the deck is not anything more than a reasonable deck that people can play if they want to. A short trip through reddit will quickly inform you on just how hated the deck is.
The objective strength of the deck is completely irrelevant to if it needs adjustment, The deck seems to be the second most hated deck of all time, behind only Azir Irelia. A deck being that hated blatantly should be removed from viability.
Some people certainly enjoy the deck, and their opinion should be considered in this process, but public opinion on Karma Sett is so wildly tilted to the negative that the decision is not close.

Can't control have one good deck?

Control has had plenty of good decks.
Often I'll see a post on reddit with a title like "Why does riot hate control", the content will usually talk about how LoR has no real control decks, and everything is just slower midrange and we've never had a good control deck.
When commenters point out a variety of strong control decks LoR has had through time, the OP will usually dismiss them with a variety of frankly comical ways to discount something as not real control.

• Darkness is a midrange deck with a burn finish
• TLC was actually a pure combo deck
• Ravenous flock decks were all midrange
• Seraphine was exclusively used with Ezreal as a combo deck

Especially comedic, people will often directly say, that LoR has never had a control deck other than Spooky Karma and Anivia.
Making any attempt to win a game does not prevent you from being a control deck. Control decks can and do play win conditions, what you are looking for would be better described as fatigue control or prison.
Modern CCGs do not have fatigue control or prison as major metagame forces for very long. These decks have some of the worst second player experience and are widely hated. LoR is not abnormal in this aspect. LoR has even HAD fatigue control (BC broadmane) and people still complained that control didn't exist.
If Karma truly was the only good control deck, LoR had ever had it would still justify being nerfed from how hated it is, but that's not the case. It even does the same stuff people dismissed TLC or Darkness for - eventually making an attempt to win the game.

Recap

Karma Sett is a good, but not broken deck that is exceptionally well suited to frustrate players. There is no reason to debate if the deck objectively needs a nerf due to power level, the deck is far more hated than liked. How to nerf the deck is not particularly relevant for the actual community to decide as Riot will be quite a bit better at solving the issue than we will. Until something changes, midrange decks with effective ways to pressure through the removal suite Karma Sett is currently running will be your best tools, often in Demacia.

It’s no secret that lots of fans, in fact I believe the majority, think that GW removing the FTL for the Tau sometime after the 3rd edition was a dumb move, since, to be simple, you aint making a multi system empire without FTL travel, as well it makes things like the Damocles Crusade have a huge plot hole in that the Tau somehow win through reinforcements coming from their entire empire, despite lacking FTL.
The user Connor McLeod on Spacebattles made a detailed analysis on how the Tau FTL worked through editions, this is a simplified version, for the quotes he used are too big for a single reddit post.

The original theory (what may or may not be the ether drive, or also known as 'warp dives') came from Battelfleet Gothic - originally in BFG Magazines (I took mine from bFG Magazine 19) but got reiterated in BFG Armada:
BFG magazine 19 said:
The Tau were able to duplicate the warp drive of the alien ship but the initial test flights were disastrous. Achieving transition to the Warp required more than technology, it required psychically attuned minds and the Tau race boasted no psykers. Without them to guide the transition no amount of power could breach the dimensional barriers. The best the Tau could do was make a partial translation, forcing themselves into the void that separated Warpspace and realspace before they were hurled out again like a ball held under water then released.
..
The Water caste scientists made the observation that the boundary between real space and warp space was not a neat line. It was closer to being a turbulent ocean fomented by the tempestuous warp tides below. By carefully angling their descent toward the Warp and extending the field generated by the gravitic drive into a wing shaped to hold the vessel down, a Tau vessel could extend the duration of the dive considerably. The speeds achieved in the ascent back to real space were staggering and coupled with the effect of the Warp on time and space ensured that the real distance covered by the dive was immense. Early tests lost several drone ships because they inadvertently passed far beyond the sensor range of the recovery vessels.
...
There was still a major constraint, only the most powerful (and bulky) drives could sustain the gravitic wing throughout the dive and the power drain meant that considerable recharge time was needed between dives. Also by comparison to actually navigating the warp the pace was still very slow. Taking typical Imperial Warp speeds the Tau drive was slower by a factor of five. The speed was consistent though, did not expose the Tau to the perils of the Warp and enabled the Tau to expand beyond their home star for the first time.
This should be well established by know, and it's pretty self explanatory. But its worth revisiting for tying everything together because in many ways the FTL system incorporates multiple parts. One part was the Tau gravity drive. Another part was the ability to 'partially' enter the warp for the dive and maintaining that dive as long as possible. And its a process they kept improving on. On the surface of this the implication is that around or even before First Sphere they had FTL, whereas the earliest you could plausibly argue they MIGHT achieve warp diving in current fluff is by third sphere. At least, in widespread usage. You could certainly have the Tau experimenting with FTL (they experimented with Imperium warp drives in Crisis of Faith after all) and that goes back to previous spheres. We could in that respect view Tau propulsion advances to be incremental steps along that path to achieving true Warp drive (or something close to it - which may be what Fourth Sphere's slipstream is/was.) I'll touch more on that 'incremental' development' later.
BFG Magazine 19 said:
Waystations are distributed throughout the Tau Empire. They mark out the main routes between Tau septs and are used to speed communications between outposts.
This has nothing directly to do with FTL travel, except to mark/identify routes they use (and maybe facilitate those routes somehow) but it does mention that they have a role in communication. I'll touch on that after the FTL stuff, although it centers almost entirely around the Shadowsun novella.
BFG Magazine 19 said:
Unlike the Tau the Kroot are capable of true Warp travel but the exact method has been kept secret from their employers. To the Kroot, warp travel is almost migratory and they seem incapable of navigating anywhere other than systems with habitable worlds. It appears they are drawn to functioning ecosystems.
In alot of ways its belief-shaped (mass belief) and not unlike Orks and the way space hulks operated. It might explain why the Tau never found the Kroot's use of warp travel all that useful, since it seems like it would be potentially erratic or less precise than warp dives. Still, it makes no fucking sense for Kroot, Demiurg or other warp sensitive allies of the Tau to have FTL but the Tau don't, especially since many factions (including Kroot and Demiurg) contribute ships to Tau fleets!
Other later sources like Deathwatch Achius Assault carried that FTL over, and even suggested it was route based (or may have had an even longer rnaged, route based variation on the 'warp dive' that allowed Vellk'han sept to reach Jericho Reach:
Deathwatch Achilus Assault said:
The humans are not the only ones to explore the Black Reef and the Tau too have been sending scouts into its gravity ravaged depths. Less willing to needlessly sacrifice their warriors, the Tau have employed those aliens from their empire with an affinity for the void and a skill at space faring, such as the ethereal Ji'atrix and the void-dwelling Nicassar. More successfully than the Imperium, the Tau have mapped
a number of routes through the edges of the Reef, at least on their side of the anomaly, allowing their ships more tactical flexibility than those of their enemies and also allowing them to lay deadly ambushes within the edge of the Stygian Break.
The Tau also enjoy a rare speed advantage over the Imperium within the Black Reef as their unusual method of near-Warp travel works more effectively than completely entering the Warp and is less prone to disruption by the gravity storm.
I mentioned the White Dwarf's circa 6th edition which alluded to it, but you also had Storm of Damocles which also seems to reference Warp dives:
Storm of Damocles said:
LOCATION: CANNIS GAS CLOUD,
DAMOCLES GULF, 999.M41
Without psykers, the tau could not make translations into the warp, but they had learnt to make short hops through the edge of the immaterial and real space, sticking to pre-ordained 'stepping stones'. This particular transit point, deep in the Cannis gas cloud, was known to connect to the Sexton Sector. It was what the tau thought was a safe transit route, but its location had been known to the Deathwatch for some time.
...
As he spoke, the first of the tau ships seemed to pulse as it skimmed into the immaterium. In ten minutes they were all gone, and the space before them was empty once more, except for the light of distant stars.
This meant that -at least in certain incarnations - warp dives relied on certain routes/paths/points to travel along (adding a certain degree of predictability, not unlike the warp routes between star systems in BFG) - it can be thought that BFG might have applied those same limitations to other factions and their FTL (Necron inertialess drive, Tau Warp Dive/Ether drives) so this was always an 'intended' trait. It also makes it clear its far from instantaneous - it takes minutes to achieve the 'skip' and unlike 'true' warp translation there is no rift. Presumably the rift only occurs if you actually punch the hole through into the Warp - the 'interstitial' medium the Tau travel through might simply be thought of as temporal/spatial distortions (we know warp rifts can be temporal/spatial distortions too - one reason that translations to/from warp space can be so highly distorted by gravity and one reason why translations in-system close to planetary bodies are so hazardous)
Storm of Damocles said:
It was a week's journey back through the warp to Picket's Watch. A team of servitors re-established power for the databanks, repairing broken cables and then coaxing out the reams of tau information.
The Space Marines had little need for sleep. They worked constantly, comparing Imperial star charts to those of the tau, finding known points of reference, and slowly piecing together a picture of tau movements to and from the Agrellan Warzone.
..
When they had inputted it all, the holo-charts glowed with criss-crossing web-lines of xenos activity. Its scale and sophistication repelled them all. Supply hubs, refuelling stations, convoy protection teams, automated drone sentries, human worlds secretly compliant, all enabling the massive movement of the invasion fleet that had smashed through to Agrellan. Konrad located two new routes that had appeared only a Terran week before the appearance of the Stormsurges.
'This is how they are transporting their new battlesuits,' he said with grim conviction.
Again note that the use of routes and mapping is important for Tau Warp Dives circa 3rd sphere (Agrellan) and they are clearly covering many tens of light years in months at most. Indeed some 'routes' seem to involve a bare week difference implying transit speeds of many hundreds of c at a bare minimum. There's literally no way third sphere could play out as it did without FTL, so this is beyond dispute.
All the same, some materials try to dispute it. While the Codexes since 6th haven't explicitly forbidden FTL, the rulebooks were something of another matter. At least in 8th edition:
8th Edition Rulebook said:
Being a non-psychic race, the T'au have no understanding of the warp, so their star fleets travel at sub-light speeds. New technological innovations have steadily increased their range, allowing them to press ever further into the galaxy. Their Second and Third Spheres of Expansion were halted only due to the barrier of the Damocles Gulf and increased resistance from the Imperium of Mankind.
Making it a bit of a headache to tie together, but not impossible since there's no real context or detail attached to the comment.
Codex tau 8th said:
In order to reach those more distant systems earmarked as desirable by advanced scouts, the vast armadas of T'au spacecraft had been outfitted with the latest Earth caste modifications. The ships' propulsion systems were upgraded so that when magnified by impulse reactors, the engines could obtain faster speeds, propelling ships forwards at hitherto unthinkable velocities. To further lessen the burden on those space-faring craft with the longest journeys, the Earth caste had outfitted transport vessels with large stasis chambers, allowing Hunter Cadres or whole commands to shift to far distant battle zones months or years away without actually aging a day in the process.
This quote cropped up in 6th too, and it was hilarious then. The 'third' iteration with the impulse reactors boosting previous drive advances (namely, the horizon drive) sound hilarious. Impulse reactors push ships to 'unthinkable velocities' yet we already knew the supposedly 'sublight' Tau already achieved near-lightspeed. Getting nearer to lightspeed might provide some more relativistic effects to protect the crew a bit from the duration, but its not going to add jack shit to speed... unless you exceed the speed of light.
In keeping with that hilarious inconsistency, the Tau in fact do this multiple times since 6th. To wit:
Tyranid 6th said:
FLIGHT TO KE'LSHAN
Though the Tau fleet was pursued by dozens of bio-ships, only a handful of cadre vessels were boarded and destroyed before the Tau successfully punched through the Tyranid blockade. Unaffected by the Shadow in the Warp, the Tau's ZFR Horizon drives propelled their ships at near light speed through realspace, and arrived safely at Ke'lshan. It took the Tyranids many days to traverse the same span of space, and for the first time in months, the Tau hoped to have a chance to catch their breath and recuperate.
Yes. Their magical horizon drives actually allowed the Tau to [i[Outrun the Tyranids[/i] Now remember that while the Tyranids having warp drive post 5th was up for debate, they still had Narvahls so its baffling that the 'sublight' Tau could outrace an explicitly FTL race. Compoudning that hilarity is the timeframe - Hive Fleet
Warzone Damocles said:
Propelled at ever greater speeds by the latest Earth Caste impulse reactors, the vast armada of Aun'Va's Tau Coalition powered across the Damocles Gulf and into Imperial Space. The expeditionary force met little in the way of significant opposition, even from the Imperial worlds that rejected the offers of the Water caste's ambassadors.
This repeats the codex bits on impulse reactors, and as I said for Third Sphere and War Zone Damocles you pretty much need to be crossing tens or hundreds of light years in weeks or months... there's no way around it being FTL. The only speeds greater than near-c are going to be many time greater than c.
Given that we can speculate on a Tau drive (and FTL) progression that follows this pattern:
Tau FTL model
First sphere has them evolving the gravity drive as per BFG. This may or may not also result in the modifications that allow (retroactively) to swiftly colonize their immediate surroundings for the First sphere expansion due to weird properties (time/space dilation) and closely placed star systems
Gravity drive (first sphere). This could still result in the discovery of a crashed alien ship and its warp drive (and experiments into that technology) but nothing definite or widespread yet.
Second Sphere is where things start to get interesting. They expand further by charting routes through dangerous parts of their space (including the Damocles gulf) through trial and error. This could be the point where we actually get navigation into and out of warp rifts in some cases, and with others you simply have warped distances/pathways to travel along. This still allows them to be 'sublight' but achieve travel that doesn't take years or decades like it should.
Second sphere, however is where they start meeting the Orks and eventually the Imperium. They learn more about FTL drives (from Ork and Imperial vessels) and they perhaps begin to study the routes that permitted their swift journeys as well. Second sphere stretches out for some time and even the end is some distance into the future, so there is lots of time for additional advances. The Horizon drive would maximize their travel speeds - travelling as close to the speed of lgiht as efficiently possible means making the most out of not only navigating warp rifts but the routes as well. Other examples of this in action would be the Black Reef/Hadex anomaly from Deathwatch
Eventually they start tinkering with their drive system in other ways to achieve other effects. We can presume the grav drive is a factor in protecting them from the effects of the warp minus a gellar field (in conjunction with their low/nearly nonexistent warp souls) but the grav drive configurations may enable them to more effectively harness and shape the routes they take, and we get into the first steps of warp dives. They start out slow and less efficient at first, but over time they continue refining the process and making improvements (being able to maintain the dive for longer (Velk'Han and Deathwatch come in here.)
Eventually, they learn to artificially replicate the Warp Dive without being confined to routes - they still can't enter the warp and it may be slower than 'in-route' travel, but this allows them much more flexibility in expanding than they had. This may or may not be the 'impulse reactors' of third sphere - we might surmise these are sort of a weaker version of slipstream drive that only achieves the 'partial' translations. We might consider this the ether drive - the logical conclusion of their pre-Warp drive travel. Speeds may get closer to equalling 'average' warp travel (non Navigator) but its still potentially much slower than true warp drive even if they could maintain the dive indefinitely (which at that point, they might on at least some ships or in some locations) Smaller ships like the Manta can also be equipped with FTL drives now.
Third sphere ends with the conflagration fo the Damocles Gulf and the Tau can no longer bypass it effectively (We could surmise that any 'artificial' dives are too short ranged or slow to make this practical over reasonable timescales for the Tau to wage war. The fastest longest-ranged routes for warp-diving would be through the Gulf, much as travelling to Jericho Reach meant the Hadex anomaly and black Reef. The Tau cannot continue their progress until the creation of slipstream drive (the final evolution of the impulse reactors to emulate Warp drive without psykers or navigators) and that brings us to 8th and eventually 9th with the fifth sphere and the Startide Nexus.
And 9th edition brings us the promise of a sixth sphere expansion... courtesy of the slipstream drive:
Codex Tau 9th said:
"Or do we exercise our new-found reach to once again push beyond what the Gue'la call the Damocles Gulf, to reclaim the septs that were lost and drive deeper than ever into the western galactic reaches? Understand my guests,this is not some mere dream. Fio'vre Ka'buto and his scientists assure me that the modifications they have made to their original designs render the Slipstream module safer and more stable than ever before when deployed en masse. With such a device at our disposal, the stars are closer than ever, and oru duty to reach them clearer.'
El'Umeh couldn't believe what she was hearing.
The Sixth Sphere Expansion, she thought, light-headed with amazement. The Ethereal Supreme is considering the commencement of the Sixth Sphere Expansion, and he is asking for my Commander's thoughts on where it should occur.
Such a thing was unheard of. The battles of the Fith Sphere Expansion still raged beyond the Zone of Silence. O'Shaserra herself led the push to colonise new worlds and raise new septs beyond the fabled wormhole. El'Umeh was hardly in possession of all the data, yet she had the impression that the empire had expended vast resources already on gathering and launching that fleet. To think that it could muster a sixth expansion even while the fifth was still underway... had the scope and scale of T'au space truly grown so vast?
Setting aside the implication that the Tau are vast enough in terms of territory and industry to sustain two Spheres of expansion so closely together, we're told that they can now safely engage in large scale use of slipstream and derive the benefits of its speed in their expansion. No more limits to warp dives or ether drive. They could achieve something that matches at least some kinds of Warp travel.
This also makes clear that the Tau not only didn't lose slipstream travel with fourth sphere. It was simply limited in its scale of application. Single ships (or small numbers) might be able to harness it effectively and without danger - but large fleets (scores or hundreds) were dangerous. Now, that may no longer be so true, and that is a HUGE game changer for the Tau.
Another thing to consider is - as I said before - in many ways the 'Ether drive/warp dive' feature is describing the same essential capability, it just evolves incrementally with each step or including a new wrinkle. First you have the grav drive - which plays a role in maintaining the warp dive once they develop that technology and presumably protecting the craft and permitting some degree of navigating the charted routes in their domain. Then as per 6th you have the 'Horizon' drive which allows for rapid and effective near-lightspeed travel. If the routes allow for the warp to amplify sublight speeds into translight speeds, then maximizing your realspace speed would be the best way to optimize travel time.
Eventually late second/early third you're getting into the true Ether Drive/Warp Dives as outlined in BFG and the impulse reactor upgrade allows for that push for 'artificially' created routes/dives (and possibly leads to the truly long-distance travel like allowing Kel'Shan to reach Jericho Reach sector despite being potentially hundreds of light years away) - the grav drive helps to maintain the dive, the Horizon engines keep speed maximized during that dive. Despite being from different, unconnected sources, you can clearly treat each iteration as being an improvement of each technology, allowing the Tau to move that much faster until they reach the presumable endpoint (currently) with a fully fledged and potentially workable slipstream drive that can be utilized for large fleets - leading to Sixth Sphere.
****
Now we get to FTL comms courtesy of Shadowsun, last of Kiru's line:
Shadowsun last of Kiru's Line said:
'It is agreeable to see you, Shas'la,' she said. 'What is the status of our communications?'
Sabu'ro glanced at Kou'to before answering. The veteran's nod told him that it was all right to address Shadowsun directly.
'Commander,' he said proudly, 'we are fully capable. Local tightbeam and interplanetary tachyon arrays are both at one hundred per cent.'
'Are you able to contact the rest of the fleet?'
'It has already been done. All ships are holding at station-keeping eight light-minutes beyond il'Wolaho's moon, as per your previous instructions. Command of the armada has passed to Kor'el Kenhi'ta, who relayed the news of what transpired today to T'au via graviton data packet.' He smiled. 'After you last spoke to me, I made all vessels aware of your survival.'
'Was that news also relayed to T'au?'
Young Sabu'ro seemed confused by the question. 'Why would it not be?'
Shadowsun nodded, imagining what the reaction must have been back on the home world. First, news that a powerful warship had been destroyed with all hands lost. Then, later on, a second bulletin informing everyone that she and a handful of others were alive, but for the moment, non-recoverable. Shock, followed by sadness, followed by joy, followed by concern. The halls of the Aun't'au'retha, the supreme council of Ethereals who presided over the Empire, must have been uncharacteristically lively this day. Once again, she blamed herself.
...
'Commander, there's an incoming data packet addressed to you.' He passed the flex-screen to Shadowsun. 'A pre-recorded message of some kind, relayed through the fleet position.'
Il'Walaho was nearly one hundred and fifty light-years away from the heart of the Empire. Real-time communication over such distances was impossible, even for a race as technologically advanced as the tau. Shadowsun took note of the time stamp as the bundle of words and decompiled themselves; whatever the nature of this message, it had been sent while her fleet was in translation from T'au.
'It says here that this was made and received some time ago. Why am I only seeing it now?'
Sabu'ro shook his head as the recording began.
'O'Shaserra,' it said slowly and clearly, 'This is Aun'va speaking. As leader of the Aun't'au'retha, may I say that it brings great relief to all to hear that you have survived the destruction of your command vessel.'
We get reference to 'tachyon' communications (presumably the short-range/in system stuff) and the 'grav-wave' data packets. There are two distinct kinds of communication and calcs here but I'll indulge in a little speculation relating to Eye of Terror. A numbe rof sources (Eye of Terror website back in 3rd edition, the Deathwatch RPG) mention tachyonic bullshit, and its often tied to Warp phenomena (as is 'subspace' bullshit in the Hoare novels.) We also know that gravity and spatial distortions are closely related to warp phenomena as well. And as mentioned before, Eye of Terror indicated that in a warp-realspace interface 'lightspeed' signals (like photons/light) could be effectively translight. In that sense, we might consider 'tachyons' to be matter subjected to the translight properties of the warp, wheras grav packets might be some sort of weird modulated grave pulses that create a sort of warp 'dive' signal to relay data back to the destination (unless of course its a physical vessel. That's not clear.) It may even be that its a tachyonic signal that is manipulated the same way the grav drive helps maintain a warp dive.
Anyhow, bullshit speculatin over nature done, we go to the calcs. The first is for the ship-to ground communications which are almost or effectively instantaneous over an eight light minute distance (this will get reiterated later) and that plays out to around at least FTL communications speed of tens of c (call it 50c or so.)
The grav-packet takes longer, but it occurs well within the space of a day (twelve hours) and possibly as little as four to six hours (remember it started during morning, and now its afternoon to evening here.) so its clearly a matter of hours top, and less than a day at worst. For the message to cover 150 LY in one day (12 hours to 24) you get between 54,000-109,000c roughly. In 4-6 hours it would be more like 220,000-330,000c. That's slow compared to some and not suitable for FTL travel (even commercial astrotelepathy can cross 10-20 LY in around 11 minutes as per Eisenhorn, whereas others have realtime communication between two nearby systems and multiple light years. 1st edition has Astrotelepathy crossing 50,000 LY in seconds or minutes even, albeit with ten words or less.) But for the Tau? That's quite fast, esp considering their FTL (such as it is) would be orders of magnitude slower. Many times throughout her career, she had pictured the memorial they would erect of her on T'au following her death. It would be placed before the Mont'yr Battle Dome, of course, where it would stand among the other heroes of her people, immortalised in six-metre-high white marble. Along the base would read her accolades – Shadowsun, daughter of Kiru, hero of the K'resh Expansion War, scourge of the greenskin barbarians, bulwark against the hive fleets.
The K'Resh Expansion War was part of the Great War of Confederation which took place in 975.M41 and lasted a dozen years, meaning this is between the end of that (12 years later, or in 987.M41) and the start of 3rd sphere in 997.M41 - no more than a decade difference. Given that Third Sphere involved Aun'Va accompanying Shadowsun personally (As 6th edition outlines) from the Tau homeworld, that means Shadowsun made a round trip from the edge of the empire and back to pick up the Supreme leader (5 years both ways).

​

Thanks to u/BlueFishcakes for the SSB universe.
[First] [Previous] [Next]
Chapter 17 - Sur Les Quais
------------------
- 18th of April 2024,12:55, Salem district, Sweden -
After a little around an hour, twice as long as it would normally take when you didn’t have to avoid alien border guards. Adam had gotten into Salem, he’d just driven past the “Salem Kommun '' sign that had yet to be changed for the past forty years, even with the invasion. Now it was just the last stretch until he reached his destination, which shouldn’t take more than 15 minutes to get to, that being the most northern part of Salem. From his current position in the most southern tip of the municipality just outside of the Salem suburbs.
It had taken long enough for the weather to go from slightly chilly and perhaps a bit cloudy. To dark clouds almost akin to something you’d see in winter and then rain. However it was still an ok 15 or so degrees out making it almost subtropical. Well, about as subtropical as Scandinavia could get anyway.
Why he needed to be picked up was a mystery to Adam, but Adam could at least tell that it must be very urgent, hence why he went in the first place. But with that said it was still incredibly random, on his way to pick up his brother he realized something else about the entire thing which was odd. Which is that for François to have gotten to Salem, especially that far up into Salem, without driving there himself, or getting help from dad, he’d have to have taken a boat.
Because clearly he hadn’t driven there himself because if he did he wouldn’t have needed to be picked up in the first place. And if he had actually driven out there for whatever reason and his car broke down, he’d have mentioned that as the reasoning behind needing to be picked up. Which doesn’t even go into why the fuck go to Vitsand? There is literally nothing there, even if he wanted to do something nefarious there isn’t anything there so there would be no point.
Meaning, unless he suddenly gained teleportation powers, or someone else dropped him off there for some reason? He had to have used a boat to get there. Thing is, there are no commercial boats going there, and there never have been.
Sure, a large portion of the public transportation system has disappeared on earth, especially places that had pretty complex systems, such as Scandivania and in particular Stockholm. And all of the destroyed infrastructure in question is being switched out for similar systems seen in the wider empire, at least from what Adam has been able to read about it. But even before the invasion, SL never had commercial boats out to Salem at all, because the part that Salem has bordering lake Mälaren.
Has nothing of interest whatsoever, the only things that border the large lake in Salem are a couple beaches, a village (Vitsand) which is barely a village since its a couple houses, a dock and a golf course. And then some vacation homes or large villas only inhabited by the affluent.
So François had to have used a private boat, meaning unless he bought one very suddenly and it broke down near Vitsand, which would be awfully convenient, he likely stole it. But Adam knew his brother well enough to hear if he’s in a manic episode or not, mainly because when François had an episode anything out of his mouth would usually just be incoherent or alternatively deranged babbling combined with constantly being out of breath for some reason.
So, unless he did in fact buy one and it just so happened to break down near enough to Vitsand that he docked just outside of there. He stole, but likely for a good reason, or because he was desperate to get away from something.
Which to be fair, could have been instigated by his aforementioned mental issues but on the phone he at least seemed fairly normal, actually more conversational than usual even. Which when he thought about it, made Adam a little concerned as it would play perfectly in hand with the fact that François did something, likely highly illegal. But again he likely didn’t have the ability to plan thoroughly if it was anything relating to him being insane. So if he did something illegal it would have been premeditated, because if he were to go on a rampage, most likely. In Adams opinion, it would be somewhere near to where he currently lives, not all the way down here.
But alas, there isn’t much need in dwelling on it. It likely wasn’t worse than what he himself had tried to do so to give himself some ease of mind he tried to think of something else. And with that Adam stopped basically driving on autopilot and instead began observing his surroundings a little more, partially because they finally got a little interesting.
This was the first time in a while that he was in the little humble town he grew up in. Sure, he’d crashed at his parents' place in Salem right after the attack at Karlsborg as he had nowhere else to go and shortly after moving out of Salem driven up again for his brother's birthday. But even when he crashed at his parents place he quickly moved away from there not long after. Mainly because he actually wanted some personal, private space for once so, once he got a job opportunity and found an apartment nearby the aforementioned workplace, he moved away from home pretty quickly.
But before that it had been another year or so before he’d been home, because his occupation pre-invasion, didn’t really lend to a lot of free time. Well occasionally he’d get days off, but the base of operations and or training facility was always too far away for him to feasible travel home since the days off were never more than two at a time, three if he got very lucky. So what would happen instead was, whomever he wanted to meet in his time off would have to travel to him. And if the training center wasn’t out in Lappland, which it occasionally was, his parents would take it on themselves to drive to where he was. Meaning he’d really not had a reason to be in Salem in a considerable amount of time, at least considerable in relation to his age.
And, as the last time he was here, once he started paying attention he noticed a trend, one he disliked, fairly quickly. The purp fuckers which were rare everywhere else Adam had been post-invasion, seemned to plentiful here, and he hadn’t even reached town center yet, he was just strolling through purple suburbia. But as he thought of it, that might just be because the local governess from what his little brother had explained, has been fairly relaxed and surprisingly competent.
It was odd that this many people were out, especially considering the weather. Maybe the almost subtropical weather suited shil’s better? Adam had heard their home planet, at least before it became dominated by buildings, was largely like the amazon.
Another thing he’d realized was that the purple district wasn’t really even protected. He’d just accidentally driven through there without thinking about it since taking the route that goes through town center was so natural for him. Sure, he could see armed guards here and there but there were no walls and no military checkpoint you had to get a permit to pass through. So Adam, for the first time in ages. And it seemed to have expanded, he thought, the buildings themselves didn’t seem to have changed that much, besides becoming purple. And that right down from the parking lot of the shopping center there was now a big, purple, town square.
And prior to said town square there was nothing there but a field. And as he drove past the shopping center he realized it hadn’t really changed much at all either like most other buildings he had seen thus far. It was now a lot more purple, had a ridiculously tall roof and looked like it lacked the character and charm it did before. But Adam had personally seen, especially the singular time he’d driven through central haninge post invasion, that the shil’s really don’t give half a fuck about local buildings codes & styles.
And he was only able to drive through the purp zone because he had to deliver some specially made furniture to some noble woman who happened to live there. So she fixed Adam’s employer a one-time use pass into the purp zone which was handed down to Adam who was the one delivering the item and that was that.
But Adam could distinctly remember just how soulless and brutalist everything looked. And while central Haninge hadn’t been the prettiest it was still rather sad to see it all gone. And Shil’vati architecture really just looked as if the Soviets had a kink for the colour purple but were also somehow, even more boring. Most of the buildings near the center are now two or at most three story apartment blocks with stores on the bottom floor. Sure they look sleek and clean but Adam would prefer a literal shack without running water or electricity to those apartments.
But maybe that was just the people hater in Adam’s head speaking though.
So with all that said that likely meant, that Salem's local governess, whatever her name may be.
Was holding back and restricting shil’vati architects, not letting them fuck with the local area too much. And the little Adam had heard specifically about her doings from his little brother made her seem like a moderately tolerable purp?
One of the things his brother had also mentioned was that purps were basically everywhere.
Instead of boarding themselves up in the face of natives that hate them with a passion, the purps in Salem. Likely forced or otherwise convinced by the local governess, actually began integrating into society itself. Moving into and renovating, and or building new housing right next to human households. Unlike literally everywhere else Adam had personally been, not that it was a very exhaustive list but it was a very strong trend within shil’ settlers to avoid humans as much as possible.
And the town center didn’t even have walls or anything which was very strange in relation to literally the rest of the entire planet. But since it's a green zone they probably don’t deem it necessary Adam realized.
And all of this, sadly, is likely why the place was one of the first in the country, and in Scandinavia in general, to turn green. He quickly continued on, however, from the shopping center and began going north instead, to Vitsand.
But the center of town didn’t end as quickly as he thought it would, not nearly as quickly. Because now there was row after row of small, three story apartment buildings lining the street.
And likely more behind just the ones he could see too, but they weren’t all just apartments either, some were shops that had both the literal alien runes plastered on them with normal Swedish text underneath. It appears that their ugly architecture, similar to the apartments in central Haninge. Can be built if there was nothing there prior, which is at least better than destroying buildings just to plop down ugly prefabs that make people want to cry.
But not long after passing the new constructions, the center of town seemed to fade away being replaced by suburbs. And a disturbing amount, somewhere probably around every 8-10th or so house, was very sleek and purple looking. Although he realized that most purps likely lived just in and around town center so the further away from central Salem you got, the less purple houses you’d see, in theory anyway.
As he finally began leaving Suburbia not long after something stuck him, he had not seen a singular, fully human couple. Not that many people were out but the only people he’d seen near central Salem, especially the ones sitting around the new town square. Were either shil who happened to be alone, full shil family with kids or a human man and (sometimes plural) shil women.
He hadn’t seen a single human woman, obviously they still lived there, it's not like they spontaneously combusted just because of the purps somehow turning Salem green, so maybe they just didn’t feel comfortable around there? Which would make sense, he did also just realize he didn’t see a single alone human guy either. So likely it could also just be a snowball effect where purp fuckers find out Salem is very safe for the invaders and those whom happen to find themselves in relationship with said aliens.
So they move to little ol’ Salem with their partner, and then they spread the word to their purp fucker friends and the cycle continues. But even then the underlying reason that the snowball can begin to form and eventually become a giant truck sized ball of ice and snow is because there is snow on the ground in the first place. Meaning that this fucking governess is damn effective. Even if she seems to be less radically speciest than the others which gives Adam a slightly better opinion of her. Still this is probably the leading reason for her success, which actually makes her more of a threat to a sovereign humanity than the chucklefuck in charge of Haninge for example.
But, Adam finally came onto the open road away from the main town. So he let his mind drift to the music which happened to be on the radio instead. Which wasn’t anything of interest to him in particular as Adam has always disliked most songs which played on the radio but at least it was usually acceptable.
One thing he started thinking about was the gym, because his mind couldn’t sit still for more than a minute of course. But on that topic, he hadn’t worked out in a while he remembered. He’d considered getting a gym membership but he’s legitimately a little concerned about getting harassed by purps, especially after what happened recently. And it's not like he has the space, nor the funds for a home gym.
But, as he finally began thinking about more benign stuff that had nothing to do with the planet's new overlords. He saw some people pretty far ahead walking towards his direction. But, one of them appeared to be just a little bit purple, he couldn’t really confirm anything until he got close especially as it was raining rather hard now, but as he did as he did so, he began growing a bit concerned.
Because the male holding hands with the freakishly tall alien girl who looked to be of similar age, him being likely 16-18, looked an awful lot like Adam's Little brother, Andreas. Last time he saw Andreas was at his 16th birthday earlier this year so he likely had changed a little bit in appearance during that time, meaning it could be him, Adam mused.
But the closer he got the more concerned, and irritated he grew, because it really did look like Andreas. And while Adam himself wasn’t the best at keeping away from shil women, he was at least aware enough of the situation to not go hand in hand in public. Well this wasn’t really in public in that sense since there was nothing but wheat fields where they were currently walking.
But still, even if he shouldn’t throw stones in glass houses he couldn’t avoid getting mad at his brother, if that was him. Which Adam sincerely hoped it wasn’t. Andreas, if it was him, didn’t seem to notice Adam however as he passed the two. His little chance of inner peace now ruined because he’d likely be thinking about whether it was him or not for the rest of the day.
Worst part is, that reminded Adam of the fact that Andreas was supposedly far up into Salem for some reason, something something classmate from his new high school.
Adam had even gotten texts from his dad briefly after nearly getting molested by a marine asking if he was available to pick up Andreas.
And now that he thought of it, that was the final nail in the coffin in Adam’s vague hope that it wasn’t his brother. The chance of it not being Andreas, was so small that it was very safe to assume it was in fact, Andreas. Especially considering that almost no one lives in this part of Salem, bar a couple affluent families who happen to own lots of farmland or forest.
So, Adam's immediate theory was that Adam, for a second time, went up here with his new “Classmate” if she was actually his classmate. He just hoped mom wouldn’t catch wind of this, for Andreas own safety.
Now he wasn’t more than seven minutes away from François though. Which made him realize that François would probably get a fucking heart attack if he saw Andreas with a shil. He’d probably get one just looking at the residents in and around Salem considering that almost half of them are human guys with small harems.
Adam also hoped that by some miracle He wouldn’t see them on the way down while François was in the car because he would actually lose his shit if he knew Andreas was a purp fucker. Not that Adam had anything confirmed obviously, but to him it was almost confirmed anyway.
So now that he was only a couple minutes away, Adam decided to try, key word here being try, to focus on driving instead of what he just saw….
[Next]

So I think a lot of us have seen the Game Theory video where Mat Pat was talking about how maybe the Tsaritsa and the Fatui are the heroes, and the archon's could be the villains (or other characters). I found some information that could be kind of important to proving his theory right or wrong, or telling us more about what is happening in Teyvat. I would just like to say, I don't know if this is already a discussion, or if other people have talked about it before, so if I have already been proven wrong or other people have already talked about it, I didn't know.
When you look up the names of the Archons (like Barbatos, Morax, Baal, etc.) the first images that show up are always pictures of demonic statues, and the first articles to show up are ocult wikepedia pages. I'm not really religous, so I don't necsassarily know what meanings they have, but I do think it is strange that the creators of the game chose to name characters that are presumed heroes/helpers after demons (the only exception being Raiden)
So first off, let's get into their names (I'll go in order of when they appear in the game's stories and archon quests). "Barbatos is the 8th spirit named among the list of 72 demons in The Lesser Key of Solomon. According to grimoire tradition, he holds the rank of Duke, and (like the demon Buer)) may appear when the sun is in the sign of Sagittarius)." (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barbatos#:~:text=Barbatos%20is%20the%208th%20spirit,in%20the%20sign%20of%20Sagittarius.) I don't nescassarily know what that means about Venti, but Barbatos serving as "Duke" could tie into Venti distancing himself from being a complete ruler of Mondstadt.
"In demonology, Morax is a Demon, Great Earl, and President of Hell, having thirty (thirty-two, according to other authors) legions of demons under his command. He teaches Astronomy and all other liberal sciences, and gives good and wise familiars that know the virtues of all herbs and precious stones. This profile of the demon can be seen in Pseudomonarchia Daemonum (Johann Weyer, 1577) as well as in Goetia (S.L. MacGregor Mathers, 1904)." (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morax_(demon))). This article describes the demon Morax as being wise, intelligent, and being well versed in culture and sciences. I feel like that descriptor can fit Zhongli, as we saw him in the Archon quest being highly intelligent about Liyue culture; specifically Noctilucous Jade (a precious stone) and incense and other materials from Bubu pharamacy (herbs). Morax in this article is also said to be a commander of many lesser demons, which is like how Liyue is very proud that Rex Lapis is always in charge and watching over their country. This has more evidence to back up my theory with then Barbatos.
"Buer is a spirit that appears in the 16th-century grimoire Pseudomonarchia Daemonum and its derivatives, where he is described as a Great President of Hell, having fifty legions of demons under his command. He appears when the Sun is in Sagittarius). Like Chiron, the chief centaur of Greek mythology, he teaches natural and moral philosophy, logic, and the qualities and uses of all herbs and plants, and is also capable of healing all infirmities (especially of humans) and bestows good familiars.[1]#cite_note-1)" (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buer_(demon))). This one is a bit more diffucult, since we all know Nahida as a sweet and innocent telapath, but it seems that Buer is less of a ruthless demon and more of an immortal creature that comands others. If Buer is compared to the wise teacher Chiron, then it makes sense since Sumeru is the land of wisdom, and has vast forests with many plants which fits in with being the land of the dendro archon (and free health care which fits in with the healing part).
Now, as I mentioned before, Baal is the exception to the rest of the demons. Baal is actually a god in mythology and religion. I feel like this could have a connection to the Raiden Ei's veiws and her trying to cease visions. If the Tsaritsa is the hero, and we know she is trying to get rid of Gnossi and Raiden is trying to get rid of visions, Baal not being a demon would fit. "Baal (/ˈbeɪ.əl, ˈbɑː.əl/),[6][a] or Baʽal[b] (Hebrew: בַּעַל baʿal), was a title and honorific meaning 'owner', 'lord' in the Northwest Semitic languages spoken in the Levant during antiquity. From its use among people, it came to be applied to gods.[11] Scholars previously associated the theonym with solar cults and with a variety of unrelated patron deities, but inscriptions have shown that the name Ba'al was particularly associated with the storm and fertility god Hadad and his local manifestations.[12]%22-14)" (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baal#:~:text=Baal%20(%2F%CB%88be%C9%AA.,to%20be%20applied%20to%20gods.) There is nothing there that really connects to Raiden's personality or mannerisms like the other archons, but there are ways that it could connect, as discussed earlier in this paragraph.
Demons aren't always evil, but in this case I will say they could be. If the Tsaritsa really is the hero who is keeping Celestia at bay, then maybe this could give proof that the Archons are antagonists. Sorry for going all this way to write this but not really having a solid point to make. Thank you for reading this, and if you have any input and questions, please let me know! I would also like to say, I still love the archons as characters, and I am not saying they are bad characters.
(Thanks to wikepedia for the articles included)
As new Archons and regions are revealed or introduced, I will add more information.
Please don't be to harsh, because I kind of just made this post because I was bored. It's supposed to be light hearted, and I'm not really here to give genuine information.

About a year ago, I made this post about three cat bites on my finger. I had already gone to urgent care but wasn’t sure if I should go to the ER. (Side note - what I didn’t mention in the post was just how HORRIBLE the pain was. I left urgent care and bawled my eyes out because they couldn’t do anything for the pain. It honestly felt like my finger was swelling up so much it would pop like a balloon).
Anyway, I went to the ER after all you lovely doctors chimed in. As I stated in the edit to my original post, they called in the orthopedist (at this point it was 2am) and he stuck a giant needle through my hand to numb it, then he opened up the wounds and had me soak my hand in a peroxide mixture. I got an IV of antibiotics as well, just to be safe.
The healing process took a long time. You can see the status of the healing here. I had to see an orthopedist, who again did an x-ray to make sure the tendons were fine. They also started me on a third round of antibiotics (three rounds of antibiotics caused other issues down the line but that’s a different story). I had to learn how to re-use my finger by doing exercises 5x a day for around six months.
Now it’s been about a year and I have full use of my finger again but it’s definitely not the same. My top knuckle does not straighten like the others. My middle knuckle is a weird football shape.
My finger still gets stiff so I still do my exercises occasionally. My hospital bill was $3000 for the man to cut into my fingers and pour some hydrogen peroxide in a bowl for me to soak but I was able to get that charge waved through financial assistance.
You can see my finger progress here
Thank you all for your help. I hope that if anyone ever gets a cat bite, you know to take it seriously and go to the ER ASAP!

Got into the series back when Spintires was a thing but I couldn't understand that particular indie game. After getting stuck in the initial area for half an hour, I uninstalled it. Then got Mudrunner through an Epic store giveaway, gave that a shot and finally understood the point of the game. Got hooked and completed it.
I'm somewhat of an offroading enthusiast myself and Mudrunner was pretty good at simulating physics. However, everything else that I care about was bad- the graphics, the UI, the UX and the modding scene. So when I discovered Snowrunner I was ecstatic. Except- I didn't know it was going to be the bane of my existence.
When I heard Snowrunner was coming to Xbox Gamepass, I wanted to give it a try because after playing through the prequels, I wasn't sure how much of an improvement Snowrunner would be in the UX department, of all things. And the bazillion DLCs were extremely confusing. For a minute there, it seemed like Snowrunner devs were trying to replicate the Sims 4 model. But I gave them the benefit of the doubt. When I booted up Snowrunner, the game looked extremely pretty but despite having more than a capable rig of running the game, the game ran like ass. The physics was still pretty bad i.e. going fast isn't a thing because all vehicles in this game crawl for no discernible reason, even if you do try going fast (above 20 mph), the small pebbles will annihilate your suspensions because your vehicle has no concept of shock absorbers, mud still feels like quicksand mixed with barrels of glue for some reason, etc. The game was still devoid of ANY other NPCs and broke immersion. There are no cutscenes or even remotely anything resembling a story. The missions were still repetitive and involved taking a hundred different types of cargo from point A to point B. BUT after a while, the low FPS issue solved itself, the graphics were still pretty and I still liked offroading so I put up with it. However, the pace was extremely, tortuously slow. There was just too much to do and slowly but surely, I could see a pattern emerge- the game would try REALLY hard to be difficult just for the sake of being difficult. A lot of these "maps" don't even feel like they're earth locations, it's like trying to colonize Mars or something except with a ton of mud and/or snow. Every single map has this pattern:

1. You'd want to do a delivery mission in a new area but first you gotta dissipate the fog of ignorance from the map by taking a scout vehicle and activating watchtowers.
   
2. Next, you're supposed to clear the roads and build the bridges because apparently, a nuclear war has taken place right before you arrive at each map. Seriously, every single map's main road is broken in at least 5 different places and your missions would all require it to be fixed.
   
3. But to fix it, you must travel to a place where the broken road leads to, so you've got to do some offroading. Great! Except that your stock trucks are useless. To upgrade them, you must complete jobs - a fuckton of jobs i.e. grinding for hours on end. See the chicken and egg problem there?
   
4. You finally drag your ass winching to trees and whatnot over to the other side of the frickin' map and when you get there, you figure out that your truck has a low saddle/high saddle/2 slot cargobed/whatever and that the cargo you're about to carry requires some other type of config because the game never bothers telling you that. So now you get to spend another 40 minutes dragging your ass back to the other side of the map because there's no garage in this map that you can quickly "Recover" your vehicle to (yes, that's a thing).
   
5. You finally get back over to the other side and go to trailer store, buy a new trailer with your piggy bank because that's how little you get paid for completing such frustrating jobs.
   
6. You slog through the mud for 40 minutes once again wishing you'd spent an obscene amount of money into the Ultra-Mega-God-Promise-Final-Season-Pass-DLC-thing that gives you access to a gamebreaking monster truck that rolls over everything that the fanboys defend with, "You don't have to use it, I literally completed the game with a unicycle juggling cargo".
   
7. You get tired of this because it's not fun and decide to come back and continue later. But the game does not have a manual save system. It only saves when it senses that you're stuck somewhere because the devs are sadists. I'm not even joking. It saves the moment it senses you're stuck somewhere. So much so that some players have even started exploiting it as a way of force-saving the game.
   
8. You come back the next day to discover that all your progress is gone despite making sure that the game saved and that you're back to square one.
   
9. ??
   
10. Loss.
    

For a long time now, I had been getting this feeling that I'm playing a skinnerbox but I guess I was so distracted by the graphics and hooked on the broken physics that I kept ignoring it. In game development, a skinnerbox is a game that relies on rewarding you in materialistic currency for grinding for hours on end because it inherently fails to provide you with a satisfying, rewarding experience. After Ghost Recon: Wildlands, this was the second game in my life which made me feel guilty of spending so much time grinding for pointless gear that didn't even make me feel good about the time I lost. These are the games you look back at and ask yourself, "What the hell was I thinking sinking that many hours in a shallow game like that?" That's what Snowrunner is.
Yesterday, there was a massive update to the game. Almost 40 gigs. I was so hooked on the game that I had it installed on both my laptop and my desktop. I installed the update on both, played the game for like 5 hours straight trying to reach level 20, force-saved the game thrice, quit to main menu and checked the "Load Game" option just to double check the timestamp of the last save and then closed the game. Came back, all 5 hours of progress was gone. Uninstalled from both machines instantly.
Why didn't I post this in snowrunner? Because that sub, like all other other game specific subs on reddit, is full of toxic fanbase that would downvote and badmouth you for having a grievance. But Snowrunner fanbase is a speshal bunch. I've literally seen even Steam threads mentioning something as obvious as optimization issues of the game and then apologizing for asking the question before other cultists join in and either gaslight the poster in believing that something is wrong with them or their PC or phrasing the admission of the issue in an extremely non-offensive-to-devs manner as if to gloss over it and handwave it away as a non-issue. If someone dares call it out, they inundate them with fallacies to distract the topic from the real issue. As a result, even the posters of such posts can usually be found kicking themselves for not understanding such an oh-so-easy thing because "indie studio".
I'm so glad I got this cancer of a game kicked out of my PC (and that I played it on Gamepass instead of paying for it). The devs are greedy pieces of shits that continue to dripfeed content in DLCs that isn't even included in their Ultra-Mega-God-Promise-Final-Season-Pass-DLC-thing instead of fixing the most basic issues present in the game since it's launch 3 frickin' years ago because the masochistic apologists have taken over the social media discussions about the game. For a game that's about offroading, I don't think the devs have ever driven a vehicle on anything more than gravel. It's a disgrace. And that's not to even mention that the main developer (Pavel), who had a deal with Oovee back in Spintires days, absconded with the source code of the game after it took off, screwing over Oovee, landing them in legal trouble and getting their Spintires taken down while launching Mudrunner with a new coat of paint and barely any fixes (which was still somehow superior to the polished piece of turd that Snowrunner is) and instead of fixing Mudrunner's bugs, started working on Snowrunner and now, instead of fixing Snowrunner's bugs, is continously monetizing the game in the most absurd ways possible for an "indie studio".
/rant over.

Hello, I suspect I got this infection from when I went on a 14-day antibiotic regimen for Hpylori last November. I got a GI map diagnostic stool test afterwards and found out I had high levels of c-diff toxin A and B. I took the test to my doctor, and he retested me via company called Quest Diagnostics and it also came out positive. I don't know if it was EIA or PCR. It reads on the report [CLOSTRIDIUM DIFFICILE TOXIN/GDH W/REFL TO PCR] TOXIN A B DETECTED. Does it mean its producing toxins?
I also have no symptoms of the typical c-diff case. As strange as it sounds, I have regular bowel movements with no stomach pain just mild constipation sometimes. I do however have POTs like symptoms, painful bladder issues and debilitating brain fog. I am not sure if these symptoms have anything to do with cdiff. I have an appointment with the infectious disease doc in 2 weeks, but I am feeling anxiety. Should I go to urgent care and ask for Vancomycin? Any advice would be very helpful, and I did read everything in the post highlighted green.

We have done it. The end of another school year! Before we jump into this last set of stories, remember to subscribe to ReddX, home of the best cringe content on YouTube. Promise, swearsies, it’s just a fact and it’s totally science. Go ahead and look it up!
I miss that intro a lot so I figured I’d just write it in. I waited until after graduation to post this because, with ManiBeard at graduation, I figured anything could happen. And it did. And with that, let’s jump into this last set of beardy tales (for this school year). Let’s a-go.

1. “No Place Like Home (Campus)”

I was in a pretty good mood because I found out that district was ticked off at admin for considering moving my Cave to a different room next year and because they keep using my Cave as ‘backup’ for state testing. Evidently, the district was unaware this was happening but after I had complained to Cook about the extent of it she went to the district and, well, I’m keeping my Cave next year right where it is, and testing use will be limited. I won without lifting a finger. Sometimes bureaucracy works. Not often, but it’s beautiful when it does.
Of course, that good mood was not to last…
On this day I had a meeting with all the other Graphic Design teachers at another campus. We will call it Clique High School (because ‘cult’ may or may not be YouTube-friendly).
The first thing you need to know is I have a history with CHS. Remember, all the way back in chapter 1 where I mention I was a substitute teacher at Standard High before they hired me as a teacher? Well, there was one part I left out because it was irrelevant to that story, but it becomes relevant here. It is true I did sub at SHS, but the part I left out was that for half of the 2020-2021 school year (Covid year), I was a long-term sub at another campus and that campus was Clique High School. To say it was a poor experience would be underselling it immensely. You could say that Elon Musk is well off but that doesn’t really express the massive mounds of money that malevolent menace truly had. Likewise, saying I had a poor experience at CHS doesn’t really express the absolutely traumatizing, terrible, troublesome experience that my life there. It got so bad that I would leave work, cry the entire 30-minute drive to SHS, pick up Beatle, and make him drive the rest of the way home because my eyes were sore from crying.
What did I do at CHS? Well, I was a long-term sub in ESL. That’s where I got my start with it. When I walked in at the start of that year I’d never had a high school classroom before, I had no lesson plans, limited access to the curriculum since I was a sub, and I was teaching virtually because Covid…and what did I do? I build a curriculum, bonded with my class, and wrote my own lesson plans (even though subs generally don’t write plans). Basically, I rebuilt their ESL program. I did apply for the job. After all, I was already doing all of the work for substitute pay. I may as well get teacher pay for being a teacher. Right? Wrong.
They did interview me for the job but then proceeded to yank me around for half a semester before finally saying they were going to hire someone else. Who? No idea. But not me. But they wanted me to continue to long-term sub and do what I was doing until they found someone. Honestly, when I didn’t get the job part of me was pissed because of all the work I put in, but part of me was relieved. You see, the culture at CHS isn’t like the culture at SHS. Their principal, whom we will call Mr. D (for reasons that will soon be clear), had been named the district’s principal of the year and his staff completely fawned over him…a staff mostly comprised of women. The male-to-female ratio at CHS was considerably more unbalanced than at SHS. What struck me as odd was that Mr. D did not seem to warrant such admiration. During my interactions with him, I got slimy car salesman vibes more than high school principal. I would come to find out that this went deeper than I knew.
Remember AVIDBeard? Yeah, to her credit she was the one that warned me. Mostly I think she saw a chance to gossip, but nonetheless. I was visiting SHS and telling the English dept. how much I missed subbing for them (they actually liked me at this time…this was long before EnglishBeard even worked there so certainly before that whole thing made me a pariah). They missed me too. Although honestly, they missed having a sub at their becken call. Let’s be real. Anyway, AVIDBeard was all too happy to jump in with gossip.
“Be careful over there Mandy,” AVIDBeard said.
“Why? What do you know?” I asked.
“I had a training over there once and this teacher that works there started freaking out because the instructor, who was also a teacher there, was late. She started to have an anxiety attack and when I asked her what was wrong she said ‘Daddy isn’t going to like this’,” AVIDBeard explained.
“What?!” everyone in the room asked at once.
AVIDBeard nodded, “I know! So I asked her, ‘you call your principal Daddy?’ and she said ‘of course.’.”
I raised an eyebrow. I was skeptical, to say the least. Even then I knew AVIDBeard was not a reliable source. But, on the off chance she was telling the truth I had to know. CHS wasn’t exactly full of friendly teachers. In fact, where everyone at SHS had been welcoming, it had been the very opposite at CHS. They treated me like an outsider they were skeptical of. I had managed to at least have somewhat of a dialogue with the librarian. She helped me to ensure that my ESL students had books in their native languages to read during the pandemic. I went to her one day to ask about scheduling some book pick-ups for the students (this was when teachers were on-campus but students were virtual).
“Hey, can I ask you something?” I asked after we had figured out scheduling.
“Sure, what’s up?” she asked.
“OK, so it’s dumb, but someone told me you guys call Mr. D ‘daddy’. Silly, right?” I said with a laugh.
She just blinked, “Who told you that?”
Her reaction caught me off guard. She wasn’t laughing. My eyes widened, “Um, I don’t remember, it just got mentioned in passing.”
“Don’t ask anyone else that question…just…don’t even mention it,” she said.
I blinked. I wanted out of this conversation, “OK, I won’t. I’ll just forget I ever heard about it.”
She nodded and turned away, “I have work to do. If you need more books let me know.”
I rushed back to my classroom. After that, the librarian was very cold toward me.
To this day I honestly believe that the reason Mr. D didn’t hire me was because I’m too strong-willed and I have a big mouth…neither fits well into a cult-like structure, which it is very obvious CHS is.
At the semester break, they hadn’t yet hired anyone and asked me to stay for the rest of the year as a long-term sub. Basically, they wanted to pay me sub pay for an entire year of teaching. I told them ‘no way’ and I begged the district and Mr. Principal to let me return to subbing at SHS. I didn’t even care that regular sub pay was less than long-term sub pay. I just wanted out…and it turns out it all worked in my favor because obviously Mr. Principal ended up hiring me for the very job that Mr. D rejected me from and I’m very happy where I am now. And I don’t even have to call Mr. Principal ‘daddy’. Gag! Say what you will about Standard High, but I’ll take it over CHS any day.
OK, I know that was a lot of backstory, but I truly need you to understand why I so vehemently loathe everything about CHS and moreover why even being there gives me a mild case of PTSD.
Alright then, where were we? Oh yeah. Meeting for Graphic Design teachers over at CHS. I was not happy about this because I hate being at CHS of course, but I also hated leaving my students with a sub this close to the end of the year. But, alas, there I was. I walked into the familiar, loathsome halls. Daddy was in the main hall greeting his subjects.
“Mandy? What are you doing here?” he asked as he looked me over. I was in full-school spirit mode. SHS staff shirt and matching school spirit Converse I had custom-made.
“Graphic Design meeting,” I said.
“Oh, you teach Graphic Design now?” he asked.
I nodded, “Yeah, I did so great at fixing their ESL program they gave me my true dream job and now I’m relaunching their graphic design program.” OK, so it was a bit of embellishment, but I wanted him to know that his loss was SHS’s gain.
“Shame…we have an ESL position open here at The Clique,” Mr. D said. That’s how he referred to his campus. Imagine if the school’s name was Blue Mountain High and he called it The Mountain. Yeah…cringey.
“Oh yeah? I heard Patty didn’t stay,” I said. Patty was who they hired instead of me. She ended up retiring after one year at ‘The Clique’.
“Yeah, well we hired Emmy to replace Patty and now she is leaving,” Mr. D said.
“Shame…yeah, I’m still at SHS and quite happy. I heard principals were turning to poaching from other high schools so I’ll save you the trouble. I’m not poachable,” I said, wanting to get away from him.
“You could have your old job in your old room,” Mr. D said in a tone that made me very uneasy.
“I have a perfectly lovely Cave. Besides, my husband works at SHS too and I like being on the same campus as the love of my life,” I said, pointedly.
“If you change your mind, let me know. Enjoy your meeting. Welcome back to The Clique,” Mr. D said as I quickly walked away to find the room Graphic Design was meeting in.
Now, this may come as a surprise to you all, but I am NOT a social creature. Truly. Beatle is my best friend and aside from Cali all my other friends are on the ReddX Discord (hence my desire to not get myself banned over there). And I am 150% ok with that. At that moment I wanted to be in my Cave more than anything. The pressure to be ‘on’ and social was beyond exhausting to me, especially this late in the year. But, always the professional, I mustered every bit of perky in me to be lovely to my other-campus counterparts.
This proved to be a challenge. One of them, more of a Karen than a Beard really, would not shut up about how amazing her campus was and how she never had issues with phones because her kids were so well-behaved. She also said she couldn’t post work early because they would have it done before they ever got to class. Oh, and of course she is teaching graphic design because she needed a break from her real job as an engineer. And oh, did she mention she is an engineer? Because she’s an engineer. She also went on and on about how she didn’t like the curriculum at another campus she was at so she complained and got 68 teachers from all over the country to back her up and they changed the whole curriculum to what she wanted. OK, whatever. I wanted to ask if everyone stood up and cheered too.
Another teacher was just insufferable. She kept asking for the same bloody stuff over and over even after being told it wasn’t in the budget. She didn’t know the cost of any of it, just that everything she wanted (think equipment and software licenses) was expensive and our budget is next to nothing right now. She didn’t even make arguments as to why we needed it. She just kept asking for the same stuff in the same way. All of it was stuff we didn’t need and most of us wouldn’t even use.
I contributed my thoughts on what I felt needed to be added to the curriculum, which was met with agreement. I really only had that one suggestion. The rest of the time I let them do their thing, which was woefully unorganized, disjointed, and overall a waste of time I could be grading papers. And so I decided that while they did their thing I would organize my Google Drive. As I was doing this I noticed something. I was still the owner on ALL the ESL files for SHS. Not just the ones I created…ALL OF THEM. If I were to hit delete SHS would literally have to start from scratch organizing their program with new teachers next year. But Ms. Dean did make clear I was to have nothing to do with ESL anymore. If I deleted the folders was that malicious compliance? Or just being a bitch for the sake of it? I still haven’t decided…I find the situation humorous, in not a bit morally ambiguous.
Ultimately, it was decided that 1 day wasn’t enough for our meeting so we would meet again one week later at the same place. I declined. I needed to be on my campus because I did have actual work to do. Grades would be due the day they wanted to meet. I wasn’t the only one. About half of the graphic design teachers agreed to meet again the following week and we would all be meeting again August 1st. So I get to start my school year back at ‘The Clique’. Lovely.
Yeah, this was a very real reminder that for all the beardery at Standard High, it could be SO much worse.

1. “Lunchtime!”

After that long mammoth of a tale that the last story was, here is a short one for you.
This happened the day after my meeting at CHS. Sonia wanted to end the school year with some team building so she asked Ms. Dean if they could have an off-campus team meeting at a nearby restaurant and grab some food. Ms. Dean told them no. Sonia then decided they would just order takeaway and do the same thing on campus. She reserved a conference room and everything.
So the day of the eat and meet came. Beatle had ordered some enchiladas and was looking forward to a hot meal during the workday. CovidBeard didn’t go because she said she wasn’t feeling well and needed to just go home early. I know that comes as a shock. Meanwhile, ManiBeard decided he would sit next to his bff, Beatle. ManiBeard hadn’t ordered any food because ‘the catering menu looked good, but nothing on the regular menu appealed to me’. What ManiBeard did have, however, was a bag of crackers. As Beatle tried to eat his food, ManiBeard both ate his crackers and talked at the same time. It didn’t take long for Beatle to realize that small bits of cracker crumbs were flying at him and his food. He shifted to the side to dodge the airborne particles that threatened to infect his space. It was here that ManiBeard declared he had signed his contract but still wasn’t sure if he would be back next year because he had until July 3rd to pull out of his contract and he really just didn’t want to make a commitment.
After the meeting, everyone went their own way, except ManiBeard, who cornered Beatle in the mudroom. I was in my Cave waiting for him when I got a text ‘SOS, I’ve been cornered! Mudroom!’
I sighed, “Come on Wee One. We have to go save Dad.”
Wee One chuckled, “Oh no.” She followed me faithfully as we headed downstairs.
“Oh, good, you’re here already. We gotta go Love. Wee One has that thing…see ya later ManiBeard!” I said as I grabbed Beatle’s arm as I passed and just kept walking.
The next day Beatle went into Sonia’s room for inclusion and she smiled at him, “Sure you got all the crumbs off?” she teased.
Beatle rolled his eyes, “Right?!”
Sonia nodded, “ManiBeard is why I don’t eat lunch in the workroom anymore. ManiBeard would walk over to me and just stand over me…like right over me…and talk while he ate which would just send food everywhere. One day he was eating some chicken salad and a piece of chicken flew out of his mouth and landed on my arm.”
“Oh bloody hell. That’s disgusting,” Beatle said before vowing not to be near ManiBeard eating ever again.

1. “Little Lies”

Ever since it was announced PastorBeard was the new dept head he had been walking around like a roster puffing out his chest. He had also been going out of his way to talk to Beatle, as if to rub in that he got the dept head job and Beatle didn’t. It was annoying, but I stayed out of it. I even played nice when PastorBeard stopped me in the parking lot one day and asked me about my weekend plans while I was waiting for Beatle.
“What are you plans this weekend, Mandy?” PastorBeard asked as he leaned against the side of my car.
“Oh, nothing major. Weekend chores. Beatle has some school work to get done and he’s going to put some snake repellant in the yard…I’ll probably clean the house and spend some time with my mum,” I said, trying to be pleasant as I could be. What I really wanted to do was to tell him he was a bastard that should never teach, let alone lead a dept.
“You should come to watch me on Sunday. I’m preaching his weekend,” he said with a smile. His tone came off like he intended it to be a flex.
I forced a smiled, “No thanks. Not my thing.”
“God isn’t ‘your thing’?” he asked, leaning towards me a bit.
I took a step back, “Not the same one you believe in.” I started absentmindedly playing with the Flower of Aphrodite pendant I wore around my neck.
“Are you Catholic or something?” he asked.
I fought the urge to roll my eyes. People presumed since Beatle was Irish that we were a Catholic family a lot. Instead, I shook my head, “No. Actually, if you must know, I’m Pagan.”
PastorBeard looked taken aback, “Oh…I see.”
“So, while I appreciate the invite…not my thing,” I said again.
“You should come anyway. I’d love to look out on Sunday and see you there. And who knows? If you hear what I have to say you may change your mind about being pagan,” PastorBeard said with a cocky smile.
I looked around hoping Beatle and Wee One were going to be there soon, “I doubt it…anyway…um…I hate to keep you on a Friday.”
“I’m not in a rush. You’re fine,” he said, “Did you hear I’m the new dept head?”
“Yeah. I know,” I said, “Beatle told me. He applied to you know.”
“I know. They need someone that is a strong leader for the job though, someone that can guide the dept the way I guide the church. They can’t pick someone with a weak personality. A man should be able to lead…his church, his work, and of course his wife,” PastorBeard said pointedly.
“Uh huh…a good leader knows when to defer to those wiser than he,” I said as I saw Beatle and Wee One, “Love! Hey!” I waved.
Beatle saw PastorBeard and looked unhappy, “Hi PastorBeard.”
“Have a good weekend you guys. See you later Mandy…think about my offer,” he said as he went and got into his truck that sat on tires far too big for it.
“What was that?” Beatle asked when we got in the car.
I shrugged, “He was either hitting on me or he was just being a pompous arse…or both. Hard to say.”
And we went on our way.
The next work day Beatle walked into the workroom and saw PastorBeard in there talking to Vera (the assistant mentioned in chapter 26.)
“Just do your best to set them up for success,” PastorBeard told Vera as he walked out of the workroom.
Vera sighed.
“Are you ok mate?” Beatle asked her.
Vera shook her head, “We’re almost done. Almost there.”
“What happened?” Beatle asked.
“Well, only 2 of the kids in that group in the hall workspace need my help,” Vera said pointing to a group outside PastorBeard’s room, “The others are kids missing work and PastorBeard kicked them out of the classroom. I’m supposed to watch them and make sure they behave but they already told me they aren’t going to do anything.”
Beatle’s expression went dark, “You’re a SPED assistant. Not a babysitter.”
“I know, but I’ve never seen him actually help anyone. He doesn’t go around the room to help. Just tells them to be quiet and pokes them. I don’t know why he feels the need to touch them. He tells them if they need help they can go to him and he just sits at his desk the whole time…but no one is gonna go to him for help because they don’t like him,” Vera vented.
Beatle sighed, “You know he’s dept head next year, right?”
“Oh, I know. He told me no one else wanted it,” Vera said sadly.
Beatle blinked, “No ma’am. I interviewed for it.”
“That’s just what I heard,” Vera said.
“He lied,” Beatle shook his head.
What PastorBeard didn’t know is that Beatle had something else in the works…we weren’t sure it would pan out at this point (as of this writing we still aren’t), but Beatle wasn’t going to take PastorBeard’s crap lying down…and for that, I was proud of him.

1. “Wrapping It Up”

3.5 days till summer. Grades were due. I sat at my computer to adjust the grade book and turned on some music. Not even kidding, ‘The Final Countdown’ was on the radio (yes, I listen to the radio. Satellite Radio to be precise). It was the perfect music for working on my end-of-year checklist. I felt like I was in a movie and this was my montage music!
We reached the point in the year when all the teachers were just playing movies. For my part, I was letting them watch the Super Mario Movie. I had some happy students. I also wrote Wee One a pass to spend the day in my room. She was done with her work and wanted to help me with some Graphic Design work for next year’s launch (we are launching an on-campus design firm). She asked me which workstation she could work at and I did the worst thing a mum can do to her child. I sat her next to my baby neckbeard. She started working but within 10 minutes she came to my desk.
“Mom…” she started.
I looked at her. “Excuse me?”
She sighed, “I’m sorry…Ms. Mandy?”
“Yes ma’am?” I asked her.
“Can I sit on the other side of the room…it’s less claustrophobic and I have a friend over there…” she trailed off.
I chuckled and leaned in so only she could hear me, “You don’t appreciate sitting next to the baby neckbeard?”
She looked sheepish, “Not really.”
“Can you smell him?” I asked.
She made a disgusted face, “Sort of, yeah.”
“OK, yes, go ahead and move,” I nodded.
In the meantime, Beatle was texting me:
Beatle: Why does ManiBeard always start class with “How are we?” instead of “How are you?”?
Mandy: Because that’s what’s in his programming.
Beatle: LMAO! Point. I will not miss him this summer. You know he said he is only helping with graduation because he didn’t help with either dance. I thought it was mandatory that we do one of the 1 dances.
Mandy: Sigh. 1) yes it is and I bet they got on him and forced him to help with graduation and 2) why the hell would they let him help with graduation? That event is stressful enough without adding ManiBeard to the mix.
Beatle: He said he rather work graduation because it’s his favorite event because he gets to see the kids move on.
Mandy: But he’s a freshman teacher. He doesn’t know many if any, seniors.
Beatle: I know! Oh, CovidBeard is leaving.
Mandy: WHAT?! FOREVER?!
Beatle: I’m watching her class for the rest of the period.
Mandy: Oh, just for today.
Beatle: Yeah. Don’t get too excited.
Mandy: Damn. 3.5 days left. Heaven forbid she stick it out.
Beatle: Right?
And right about the time I was hoping my Beard encounters were over. At least until graduation…it happened. I had to email EnglishBeard. Why? Because I needed one of his students (who happened to be one of my most talented graphic design students) to come to my class the next day during his class. I cringed at having to interact with him. I asked Beatle if I should even bother. “We’re not doing anything, why would he say no?” Beatle asked. “He’s a beard.” I replied. “Fair.” Beatle conceded.
Finally, I took a breath and started to type: “EnglishBeard, if it is alright with you, can Sara come to my class during 5th period tomorrow to do some Graphic Design work? Thanks, Mandy”
2 hours later, he replied, “What work? Why should I send her to an elective? My class is core.”
I sighed, “It’s ok if you are doing something in class. I just thought it would be ok if you are just watching movies.” I replied.
“We are just watching movies, but my class is still a core class and yours is not,” EnglishBeard replied.
“You are correct. However, Sara is going to be in my Graphic 3 class next year and I want to get all my Graphic 3 students together for a meeting before the end of the year and the rest of them are in my 5th period. If you don’t want to send her that is fine,” I replied.
“Ok, that would be fine. I will allow it,” EnglishBeard finally said.
I sighed and wrote a pass to give to Sara.
Meanwhile, in the English 1 meeting, Beatle was dealing with his own Beard.
“And the Beard came back….CovidBeard came back for the meeting,” Beatle texted me.
“WHY?!” I texted back.
“IDK! I’m spraying Lysol when she leaves the room. She’s like ‘I’m sitting here sweating. I have no idea what I have.’ I guess she came back for attention,” Beatle replied.
I sighed as I typed, “Probably.”
Why did all these Beards have to come back? Why couldn’t this be last year when we had the mass exodus of Beards? That was nice. I liked that.
Maybe they would get less beardy over the summer?
Probably not.

1. “Graduation Day”

Have you ever sat through a graduation ceremony? If you have you know how dull they are. Being part of it is even worse. Graduation in Australia was quite different, but when I graduated from college in America Beatle practically had to force me into the cap and gown. It was not something I have ever liked…so the irony that I volunteer every year (except next year when Wee One graduates) is not lost on me. Mostly, I do it because I know it means something to the kids to see their teachers there. That said, I silently curse in my head the entire time while making sure to smile, be peppy, and congratulate even the most ungrateful of students. While I don’t look back on my graduation fondly, some of them might and I want to help provide good memories.
Graduation isn’t just on that day either. The day before we have to participate in graduation practice, which is just as awful, if not worse. I did entertain myself by watching ManiBeard however.
We all gathered in the practice gym to line up and then once everyone was in place we processed into the main gym. The practice gym was so bloody hot that I was sweating. It was so bloody hot that ManiBeard actually took off his cardigan for the first time all year. I have now confirmed he does have arms under it. Bloke never takes off his cardigan/coat…even when the outside temp is 100+ in Fahrenheit. I further observed only to realize that they had, for some reason, put ManiBeard in the same row as 2 of the baby beards I’ve been observing over the course of the year. ManiBeard was as clueless as one might expect and had no idea how to manage the kids and telling them when to stand, when to sit, when to walk, etc. He made it through graduation practice, but I was seriously concerned about the next day. I was also concerned because I saw the gown they set aside for Mani. It was huge! He was going to look like a puppy wearing his owner’s sweater. Let the chaos commence!
And commence it did. Shortly after lunch Beatle texted me “OZZY ISN’T COMING BACK! WHAT THE HELL IS EVEN GOING ON AROUND HERE?!”
Remember Ozzy? The other Australian on campus? Yeah, evidently he said, “this really isn’t something I foresaw happening. It is something I needed to do. But please, I don’t want to make it seem like I’m excited to leave. I’m not. It’s actually been really hard packing up my things.” Ozzy had been around since the campus opened in 2016. It was a true shock to see him leave and Beatle was very distraught over it. Honestly, so was I.
After school Beatle barrelled into his classroom, “OK, mate, what the hell is going on?”
The conversation was private so I’m not going to detail it, but I will say that circumstances happened so that Ozzy had to go back to Australia. He was not happy about it. He said he thought he would retire from Standard High, but life happens. This was a blow, but we wish him the best.
I found out later that night that ManiBeard managed to out-beard himself. He did the beardiest thing he’d ever done.
“Did you guys meet today in E1?” I asked Beatle.
“Yeah, but it was more social than a meeting,” Beatle replied.
“ManiBeard? Social? How did that go?” I asked.
Beatle chuckled, “ManiBeard wasn’t there.”
“Why?” I asked.
“Because he miscalculated all his grades and had to redo them,” Beatle said.
I froze as I tried to register what he said. Finally I spoke, “But our gradebook is automated. We don’t calculate anything. We put in the number and bam…grades. How the hell did Mani manage to ‘miscalculate’ grades?”
“No idea, but admin wasn’t happy. They sent in Lana to guide him through it,” Beatle said.
I laughed, “Oh my god! After everything he did to keep Lana out of his room she ended up fixing his gradebook? The irony is too delicious! This has got to be the beardiest thing he has ever done. How the fuck do you miscalculate grades in and automated gradebook?!”
Beatle shrugged, “Talent?”
The next morning (THE LAST DAY OF SCHOOL) an email started circulating from teachers that were worried about getting left at the arena we were holding graduation in. They wanted to ensure the bus wouldn’t leave them behind. Beatle and I watched as the emails flooded our inboxes. ManiBeard: “I need a ride too.” EnglishBeard: “Don’t leave me behind!” HistoryBeard: “I look like too much of an escaped inmate to safely hitchhike. Don’t leave me either.” MathBeard:I need the bus to get back to school.”
It was at that point I texted my brother to see if he could pick Beatle and I up after graduation. To be clear, we have to ride the bus over with students so taking our own car wasn’t an option…but riding the BeardBus home did not appeal to either of us. I like getting fodder for stories, but I’m not a complete sadomasochist. My brother agreed and I felt relief wash over me.
Beatle and I ended up combining our classes in my Cave for the last day because we bought breakfast tacos and donuts for the kids and it was easier to combine classes than to try to split the food. So, most of the last day was the kids eating and playing Mario Kart on our Switch. It was pretty fun. I did leave the kids with Beatle at one point so I could go down to Cook’s kitchen and do my department check-out stuff. When I say Cook had a professional kitchen that is not hyperbole. The culinary kitchen at Standard High is anything but standard. We’re talking a state-of-the-art kitchen that any head chef would be in awe of. It’s truly a thing to behold and for high school students? Yeah, it is pretty bloody great. Oh, and the cutting boards…let me tell you about the numerous cutting boards!
…I’m kidding Red! Just kidding!
But yeah, the kitchen is pretty great. Anyway, when I went into said kitchen, MediaBeard was in there doing his check-out as well. When he saw me he smiled and turned to me.
“Mandy, thank you so much for everything you did for me this year. It was a rough year and you had my back. I truly appreciate you, thank you,” he said as he hugged me.
I hugged him back, “Aww, mate…I got ya. Anytime. Next year will be better.”
When I said back in Chapter 1 that MediaBeard was certainly a Beard, but one of the ‘good’ beards, this is what I meant. Yes, he can be a bit…well…beardly. But, the bloke has a good heart. And I am glad he will be back next year. I’m going to try to mentor him now that I’m settled in graphic design. I am also glad he will not be Wee One’s teacher next year. She’s decided to take graphic design 3 and animation 1 which means she will have me as her teacher for 3 out of 8 periods. Come to find out she likes me as her teacher. And I’m pretty hard on her. She said I made her better. I must be doing something right!
Cook has 100% become my work Mum and I adore her. She plans to have a department soiree before school starts and for the first time ever I’m actually looking forward to going to a department function, solely because of Cook. She is amazing.
Finally, as long last, the 2022-2023 school year ended. All the non-senior students left and the seniors arrived.
Beatle and I scarfed our lunch down and headed to the gym… this is where graduation truly begins.
I put my gown on over my work clothes as did Beatle. We sat together and chatted for a bit before he went to his row to help organize kids. I was left sitting alone in my row as the students filed in. And, as I usually do in these situations, I started to observe my surroundings and live a bit in my own head.
I saw some teachers grouped up talking and laughing near me. For a moment I felt that loneliness I felt all through school (until I met Beatle). I had a moment of feeling like that ‘weird blonde kid’ again. I guess it never really goes away. It was a reminder that from the day we met (see SquirrelBeard for that story) Beatle has always been where I fit. Does anyone else ever have a moment of reversion like that? Where even as an adult you remember how it was to be an outcast at 15 or whatever? Maybe it’s just me? Maybe it’s because I work in a high school?
In any case, I snapped out of it and looked around. What caught my eye was a pair of BRIGHT crimson skinny jeans. And the wearer? ManiBeard. OF COURSE! He also had on a plain white t-shirt with the district logo on it that we got free at the start of the year and Van trainers. What was the dress code for this event that admin had explicitly given us the day before? Dress pants and a Polo or button-up for men or a suit for men, a dress or nice pants and shirt for women, dress shoes, and absolutely no jeans, trainers, or t-shirts. Yeah. For J’s part he had on black pants and a black button-up shirt with a tie. He looked good. It was also the first time he got to wear his Master’s hood at a graduation, which was pretty frickin cool too! I had on black pants and a nice shirt. I was not wearing a dress at graduation. Just, no. Anyway…ManiBeard…right…so he wore EXACTLY what admin said don’t wear. Cause…ManiBeard. And I was right, his gown made him look like a puppy wearing his owner’s sweater. It would have been cute if it was anyone but Mani. Instead he just looked robotic and lost. And, exactly like I suspected, he didn’t talk to any of the kids. He didn’t even congratulate them. Probably because he teachers 9th graders and didn’t know any of these kids and had no connection to them. Beatle knew a lot of them. These were the kids that he taught his first year as freshmen so he had seen them through all 4 years. It was emotional for him.
It was around this time I turned around and noticed paramedics in the hall. I later found out a student (one of mine actually) had a seizure. I had seen them roll a kid out of the building on an office chair but I didn’t know who under Mr. Principal told me later. As all of this was happening APBeard said they put a sign up sheet on the stage for any teacher that needed to take the bus back to campus after the ceremony. A bunch of teachers headed to the stage. One that looked like a textbook beard said, as he walked past me, “that would be all of us. Like any of us can afford an Uber with what they pay us.” I raised an eyebrow and looked the man over. “That has GOT to be HistoryBeard” I thought to myself. Beatle ran up behind me.
“See that bloke up there…the one at the sign up sheet right now?” Beatle asked me quietly.
“Yeah,” I said.
“That’s HistoryBeard,” he confirmed.
“I knew it! I knew that had to be him. Damn, he is a beard and it’s not even just on the inside,” I said.
Beatle shook his head, “No, he’s one that is beard inside and out.”
I shuttered as Beatle returned to his seat.
About 45 minutes later we boarded the bus and headed to the arena. I hoped everything would be smooth sailing from there, but that would have been WAY too easy.
So, I need to paint a bit of a picture here…have you ever been backstage at an arena? It’s not a huge space…and when you put a couple hundred people back there…it’s a tight fit. We were lucky to have a 2 inch radius around us. Personal space does not exist when you cram everyone back there. And we had to line up in order. Each row had a letter. It seemed everything was fine. My row was in order…but something felt off. That’s when I realized whoever set the signs up doesn’t know the bloody alphabet because instead of A, B, C, D, E, F, G it went A, B, C, D, E, G, F. I was in row F. I realized the error but I also wasn’t about to move anything without telling an AP. So I found an AP that said he had to find another AP and 3 APs later I was told to swap Rows F and G. I helped correct the signed and then we had to shift the rows with VERY little space. It was…something.
It was hot, cramped, and miserable. Beatle told me later some of the kids in his row snuck back into a supply room and were stealing popcorn. It was in the moments of being back stage I remembered why last year I said to myself ‘never again, I’m never doing graduation again’. I’m really not next year cause of Wee One and I’ll probably forget the year after and volunteer again. Cause teacher brain. Anyway, it was finally go time and we walked out, sat down, and the ceremony started. All done? Not quite.
For the sake of wrapping this up I’ll quickly list the crap that happened during the ceremony:

1. Someone in the stands called to a kid ‘you look like ET but we love you anyway!’ to which a graduate yelled back ‘you’re an asshole’. Classy.
2. ManiBeard was clueless and lost. He may as well have not even been there because he was mostly just in the way.
3. The boys decided it was great fun to pretend to fall on stage just before the got to Mr. Principal. This happened 4 times. A 5th pretended he was about to fall then twerked instead. Again, classy. Ladies and gentleman, our future.
4. A boy in the row in front of me turned around and was using his program to sword fight with a boy in my row. I gave them the ‘mom/teacher look’ and they both got a panicked look and said ‘sorry ma’am’ before sitting straight for the rest of the ceremony. Maybe Wee One is right. Maybe I am scary.
5. MediaBeard made the senior video and it was awful. I have a hard time believing he worked ‘in the industry’. Next year I’m going to see if he will let me do some graphic design templates for him. It will be part of my proposal to mentor him.

And then graduation was over. Beatle and I checked with Number One and were cleared to leave. Brother picked us up and we headed to dinner (where Brother once again came very close to getting the name BrotherBeard) and summer began.
And that concludes this year of School of Beards. If there is any demand I will be back in the fall because with all the beards returning I am sure to have a new batch of tales. I sincerely want to thank everyone that had come on this journey with me, Red for reading (and being a mate), and Beatle for supporting me and allowing me to share his stories. I mostly want to thank everyone that has listened to Red read these stories because that is the most amazing thing…hearing these stories read and getting his insight. I do appreciate it more than I can say. Keep an eye out for the rest of BowserBeard this summer and maybe a couple of one-offs.
Now, to end this year I decided to try my hand at my first parody song. Apologies if it’s not very good. Like I said, it’s my first one. I hope it doesn’t suck!
“BeardSchool’s Out” (Parody of “School’s Out” by Alice Cooper)
Well, we got no choice
But to hear the noise
Listenin to the beards’ voice
The poor girls and boys
Well, we can't escape ya
Can't find an out
And when they start to shout
Education’s in doubt
BeardSchool's out for summer
Beards go into slumber
Beardschool makes us shutter
No more Mani
No more English
No more preacher's judgment, yeah
Well, Mani can’t control his class
And Pastor’s got the Principal
And the students pay the price
We can't even think about next year
BeardSchool's out for summer
Beards go into slumber
Beardschool makes us shutter
No more Media
No more Math Emails
No more two-faced Dean
Out for summer
Out 'til fall
Do the beards have to come back at all
Beards go slumber
BeardSchool's out for summer
Watch the Beards lumber
BeardSchool’s out till August