Numrich gun parts
Gun_Parts_For_Sale
2021.09.07 16:32 phoenix27426 Gun_Parts_For_Sale
Selling magazines, Barrels, stocks and Everything in between. Enjoy not being micromanaged over the minor details from moderators.
2013.05.25 16:30 FordTech Parts for guns
A sub to sell and locate gun parts. A sub to discuss gun repair
2013.02.21 15:39 PhilWV For DIY guns, gun parts, targets, holsters, stocks etc.
Show your gun building skills! Share your pics and experience in gun fabrication, gun restoration, gun cabinets, steel targets or anything else that you make yourself or modify that has anything to do with weapons. In a SHTF situation, what you share here could save lives!
2023.06.05 12:08 KAMEKAZE_VIKINGS IRL Shipgirl of the day #401-USS Pensacola
2023.06.05 12:00 WaveOfWire One Hell Of A Vacation - Chapter 88
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Royal Road P
atreon u/KieveKRS providing the Trash certification of quality!
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The maw of the moss-wolf chomped down on the treat, its partner patiently waiting its turn, an eye trained on the Human providing the sustenance. Joseph reached into the pouch, counting out what he had left and mentally setting a few aside for the raven-like birds that Scarlet had trained to bother him.
Well, ‘bother’ might be a strong word. They would whistle at him and wait for food. Upon getting their hard sought quarry, they would return to share it with the rest. Surprisingly cooperative, all things considered. Scarlet had apparently been getting them to associate certain short melodies with members of the pack, allowing her to send the avians after whoever she wanted for more snacks.
If they didn’t get any, then they would yell something not dissimilar to a caw until either food was procured, or they grew bored. Given that they had taken to humouring Violet in her attempts to be a mobile perch, that usually took a while.
It drove Nalah nuts, which seemed to be part of the reason the blond-furred female was included in the ritual at all. Harrow was apparently the favourite target of the nuisance when she was outside the base, but he couldn’t say why.
The tell-tale scratching had been somewhat muted since the shift in medium, but Violet’s writing was always something he kept an ear out for, his daughter presenting her tablet excitedly. [It blinked!]
He turned his head to the cow-looking thing, the unwavering stare held until he gave up. “I swear you guys are just messing with me.”
“Or we merely enjoy your suffering,” Sahari suggested with a smirk, the black-furred female standing taller than him for a moment as she stretched her legs out. Settling into a height that was level with him, she attempted to offer the wolves food. Receiving a fearful retreat instead, the black-furred female frowned, the two canines shifting in their enclosure to be closer to Joseph and Violet. “They still seem to distrust any but yourselves.”
He shrugged, taking the scrap from her and giving it to the young Atmo to pass along, her chittering laugh when the wolves accepted the morsel breaking the soft sound of trickling rain outside the barn. “Faye was the one who started this. I guess they treat her like an alpha of sorts, and seeing her bow to the two of us so often told them that she’s lower on the pole. That’s my guess, anyway.”
“That is….rather intelligent of them, if so,” Sahari commented pensively.
The Grand Hunter tipped his head in agreement. If anything, it was an understatement. The six-legged canines were remarkably receptive to taming, though he couldn’t say how much of that was due to Faye taking to his suggestion so seriously. He had only offered it as a passing thought, but she had set to it like their god had mandated it.
He fought back a sigh at the reminder of his placement in the whole thing, his foot kicking the ground to adjust the new sandals he was wearing until Pan finished proper shoes.
One day, he was a divorcee flirting with random women on a cruise ship so that the rejection validated his own self-esteem issues. The next, he was a guy in charge of a settlement nearing one hundred people and had become a manifestation of religion condensed into the form of some random moron.
He snorted at a morbid thought. How would Emma react to his ‘rise to fame?’ His acquisition of more than they had ever thought for themselves back on Earth?
Owning a territory? They could only manage a nice apartment that could fit several times over inside the base. Friends? Hell, he had a group of people who have helped him through some of the worst the planet had to offer. Kids...well, nothing could replace Violet. He doubted Emma would see it the same way, though.
A paw enclosed his shoulder, dragging his mind from more sombre thoughts. It had been quite a while since everything fell through and he had moved on, but it still stung every now and again.
“What ails your mind, Joseph?” Sahari asked with a concerned inflection. He looked over at her, a smile becoming easier after a moment.
“Just wondering how my ex-wife would react to seeing what I’ve turned into. What she’d say to all of this,” he admitted honestly with a wide gesture to everything. She patted his back, a small pride in her gaze.
“You continue to heal, Grand Hunter, but you are still scarred. Your previous mate would curse her decisions were she to see what you have accomplished.”
He snorted, a wide dry grin breaking out. “I’d love to see her face going back with two alien wives and this sweetheart as a daughter,” he teased, giving Violet a thorough rub on the head. She purred, chittering between breaths as she fought off the rough affection playfully while keeping her blades tucked for safety.
The black-furred female tilted her head and shifted her weight to her other foot. “You’ve mentioned that there is a specific procedure for binding the lives of your people, no?”
He blinked, his mind flickering to the two rings he had prepared, yet held some modicum of expectation around before he whipped them out. Not least of all was the foreign sensation of doing it again
twice, nor finding an appropriate time to do it. It was hard to pick a picturesque moment when each day was paperwork, punching people in the face during spars, and orchestrating the well-being of such a large group. Given that the closest thing he could get to a romantic occasion was laying down on the grass while Nalah barked orders at the construction crews in the distance, he didn’t feel like it was ever a good time to ask. It was even harder picturing himself doing it to the two of them, as if it cheapened the gesture in some way.
Then there was the part of himself that feared rejection—as stupid as it sounded. They could deny the alien practice, not share the same sentiment, or any number of disagreements that would render him kneeling like an idiot. As unlikely as it was, it could even be too great a commitment for them, the implication of their entire lives being pledged solely to him being a crushing weight, rather than a promise of mutual loving dedication.
Sure,
now they were speaking as if it was the case, but the circumstances as they were lent themselves to it being a product of necessity. Who was to say that it would remain the same once they got off this rock and—hopefully—in touch with their own people again. Would they still feel the same way with an entire species back on the table as possible romantic partners? Would he still be enough?
“Joseph,” Sahari called out with worry and irritation in equal parts. “You are making me anxious.”
“Hm? Oh, sorry,” he apologized sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck as he was reminded that more than one person could be afflicted by his emotional state. She placed a paw to her hip.
“Are the proceedings really such a means for strife?”
“Ah, no, it’s just…” He averted his eyes, offering Violet a token smile when she seemed to be concerned about him. He inhaled deeply. “It’s just…I have reservations about it.”
She raised a brow. “I need not a bond to know you care for them deeply enough to toss your life to the Void for them.”
His weak smile faltered further. “Well, yeah. They mean everything to me, but I cant help but remember how things went last time, I guess. There’s a million and one ways it could go up in smoke, and I…” He fell quiet for a moment, Violet pressing herself into his side in an attempt to cheer him up. He rested a hand against her back, the texture comforting in a way. “I want it to be an important moment in our lives, rather than some disposable token that they accept without thinking much. It’s not like they’re swimming in potential romantic partners here, so it feels like they’d be agreeing for lack of options.”
She stared at him with a hesitant expression, her cheek pinched between her teeth and eyes narrowed in thought. “Pan would sooner end her own life than be separated from you, and Tel would end any who so much as suggested such,” she stated finally. “To you, the mark upon your flesh is but a sting that fades. To them, it is their declaration that they have found their reason to live. A declaration that is shown to all others of our people the moment they draw near. Though Pan lacks the means to impart her own, she is rather pleased that another is able to in her stead and treats it as her own for all intents.”
She grabbed him roughly by the arm, pulling him into her breast as she stood to her full height, a surprised yelp stifled by soft clothing and fur.
“Unfortunately for you, openly voiced or not, we all feel as such. Though you bear not the mark of everyone in the den, I assure you that to be removed from you would leave us lesser, regardless of bond.”
He shut his mouth at the last addition. There was a weight behind knowing that people were likely to simply
give up on living if you were away for too long. It put the relationship in front of a loaded gun for both parties. They couldn’t afford to break it off from him because existing would become a living hell, and he couldn’t change his mind for any reason because it would be the same as killing them.
What kind of marriage was one built upon such fragile pillars? How could they be happy when every fight was tempered by the threat of the end of everything? What about Sahari? Could she ever pursue her own life with Nalah when she had the bond shackling her to him? How long until that became a stinging poison, rotting away the veins and arteries of her psyche? How long until death became preferable to being around him?
A strong impact to his stomach winded him, though the unnoticed hyperventilating left him little to eject as he fell to his knees. Violet clicked in surprise, the wolves backing away at the unexpected violence.
He coughed, sputtering spittle as he fought the urge to evacuate his breakfast. A pained glance up revealed Sahari still clutching a fist, her expression just as hurt.
“You hear my words and twist them, Joseph,” she chastised softly, crouching to look at him better. “We pledged our lives to you. Not because we had no choice, but because we believed you to be our future. From that moment on, our desire was to remain with you.” Her voice grew weak, almost pleading. She placed her forehead to his, the contact an intimate touch. “Your experiences may suggest our bond a prison, but for us, it is an ambrosia for our soul. It completes us like no equal. Jax and Harrow care for you immensely, Nalah and myself owe you everything that we are, and your mates will fight the Hunt Mother herself if it would mean even one more sun with you.”
He found himself speechless, wading through the emotions behind her words a syllable at a time. The feeling of Violet pressing into his back in an embrace stung as much as soothed, his mind rejecting the idea, yet so desperate to accept it.
“Do not desecrate our affections because you had been scorned by one who did not see within you that which we covet,” she implored sombrely, raw emotion oozing through the confines of speech. “Though you doubt it, none would know how much value you place in the ‘mark’ of your people more than your mates. If merely thinking about the unlikely event that they refuse tortures you so deeply, than the elation they would share with you when they agree would likely see Pan unable to contain herself for many suns after.”
He stayed on his knees, the warmth surrounding him from both sides seeping within and thawing the frozen excuses he held onto to prevent exposing himself to potential rejection. Every step of the way since he had met them, it had made him fearful of losing their company. At first, the thought of being left alone to brave the planet was too much to bear, but he would try. Now? Now he felt like he understood where the minds of those bonded Lilhuns had been. Even considering being away from his new loved ones pulled at a primal part of himself, each tug stronger than the last, each suggestion fanning the flames barricaded behind morals—the depths he would trudge to see it never come to pass.
Sahari nuzzled into his neck for a moment before parting, a somewhat satisfied smile given towards the emotionally fragile Human they had taken to depending on. He returned his own, though it was tinted with a bit of embarrassment.
Violet stepped back to allow him room to stand, the extended joint of her blade asking to be held like he did with her adoptive mother. His expression softening, he did as requested, lightly rubbing the smooth surface with his thumb. It soothed a part of him to be holding his daughter’s ‘hand’ while they watched the wolves slowly approach the front of their enclosure again, now that the momentary intensity had faded.
With a self-deprecating roll of his eyes, he nodded, promising himself to follow through with his small wish the next time the chance revealed itself. It didn’t need to be perfect, but it would be nice if it was at least private. The dull ache in his stomach would be a reminder not to second guess himself anyway.
The wolves yipped, ignoring Sahari as they moved towards the other corner. Joseph glanced at where they were focused, his curious gaze replaced by surprise, then shock.
Raine supported Faye over her shoulder, the deep gold-furred female’s breath short as she rested her weight over her brown-furred counterpart, their black leather coats dripping water onto the floor as it wrapped tightly around them, concealing their armour. A steady trickle of blood flowed from a long gash on Faye’s leg, her free arm clutching across her breast to keep her coat closed.
Without waiting for either to speak, he ran to pick up the Wraith, slinging her across his shoulders and tearing off to the base. He could barely hear Sahari over the rain and his own blood pounding through his ears, his heart hammering in his chest. Though they had established something of a clinic for minor injuries that were sustained constantly, his singular focus was getting Faye into the medbay.
Pack members cleared the way, some jumping to the side as he barrelled through the sparely populated routes between home and workplace. More than one tripped over themselves in shock, the Human never having a reason to go at a full sprint before. He was slower than a Lilhun like this, but he could make it the full distance before them. He didn’t need to slow down.
Harrow pushed open the doors to the hub, her distant expression as she examined thin ironwood tablets perking, his rapid heavy footfalls telling of his arrival before she had the chance to see him. Her eyes lit up, her brows furrowed, and a hurried pull of the door kept it open for him, all in sequence. He didn’t have the spare breath to explain or thank her.
The orange-furred female bolted across the hub, slamming into the crash-bar installed into the facilities wing entrance to force it open, only barely outpacing the Grand Hunter in his rush. She staggered to her feet behind him, rushing to collect herself and assisting in tearing the pants off of the injured female when Joseph laid her on the bed.
Modesty being the least of his concerns, he braced an arm across her pelvis to stop her hips from bucking as Harrow wiped off any dried blood to see the extent of the damage on her thigh.
“What happened?”
He tightened his hold on Faye as his friend tentatively spread the wound to check for debris. “Don’t know. Didn’t ask. Saw her bleeding, rushed her here,” he answered through deep breaths, each strike of his adrenaline-fuelled heart pressing against his lung capacity.
Harrow frowned, grabbing some sterile water to pour over the wound and picking out a stray splinter of wood that looked to be from her missing leg armour. Faye let out a small whine, but didn’t have it in her to talk yet, signs of exhaustion and pain unfocusing her eyes.
The Head of Technology—and current medical expert in the room—pursed her lips against her muzzle. “We need to stitch it. It’s too big for just healroot.”
Joseph nodded, easing his weight off the Wraith and wiping his sweat from his brow. “Pan!”
Noticing the urgency in his voice, he could hear her throw the door to the sewing room wide open and jog to the medbay, her wide eyes steeling as she assessed the situation.
“Idee with you?”
She nodded, ears turned perfectly towards him.
“One of you boil off some palm string, the other sterilize the thinnest quill you can get away stitching a wound closed with. I don’t care who, but we need one of you to close this up.” He glanced at Harrow. “Grab some alcohol. I keep a bit in the closet in my room, next to the old crossbow prototypes. We need to flush this out and kill off anything that might have gotten in.”
The orange-furred female tipped an ear in confusion as Pan took off to do as he asked. “I thought you didn’t have medical-”
“I’ve been around enough workplace injuries, okay?
Go!”
His shout jolted her into action, a few steps required to gain traction as she ran out the door. Applying solid pressure to the wound with one hand, he used the other to lightly tap Faye’s cheek.
“Faye? Faye, you with me?”
Her eyes languidly turned to him, slow blinks and meaningless mouthing ceased, a soft smile forming under her pained expression. “Hello, sir.”
He exhaled a relieved huff. “Welcome home, Faye. What happened?”
She seemed confused by his question, glancing down to her leg after a few seconds. With widened eyes, she struggled to sit up, Joseph forcibly pressing her to the bed.
“
Stay.”
All resistance disappeared in an instant, her body complying despite the obvious urgency. He hardened his expression.
“What happened?”
She breathed deeper a few times before speaking. Each word was hesitant, as if the memory was hazy and diluted, though he couldn’t tell if it was due to blood loss or exhaustion. “A large grey beast…teeth, large mouth...attacked wolves...”
His brow knitted, Faye’s coat moving. A small whine came from her again…no. Not her.
A small yellow canine head freed itself from the confines of black leather, a weak keening produced from a tiny moss-wolf. Faye looked at him guiltily, a pleading look in her eyes given as she composed herself.
“It lost its parents…”
His protest died in his voice, a distant memory of a wolf being torn in two came to mind. The time before they had even moved to the pod, let alone met the Lilhuns, him and Violet checking snares shortly after his ankle had healed. A time so long ago, yet remained with him under the surface.
“You saved this little guy, huh?” he asked gently, wincing in tandem with her own when he leaned heavier on the massive gash in her thigh. She nodded, averting her eyes. “Did you get the ‘beast?’”
Faye shook her head. “Raine lured it away, but it still remains.”
“That’s fine. You’re back, that’s all that matters right now.”
Harrow bumped into the doorway, failing to shed all of her speed as she returned from fetching a smaller container that Joseph kept in case the rest of the pack burned through their stores of alcohol. Her eyes flicked to the wolf pup before disregarding it to hand him the ethanol. He lifted his hand, Harrow pouring some water to wash off the blood. Volta would be busy later, it seemed.
Gesturing for the orange-furred female to hold the leg down, he poured the alcohol into the wound, grimacing at Faye’s pained gasp. They didn’t have anything for her to bite into, but that would be a future consideration.
Pan and Idee entered the medbay, the former moving like a machine with purpose while the visiting seamstress took a moment to size up the situation. The Paw fetched a tray from the shelf, laying out several strings of softened palm and a few thin quills, threading one and passing it to Idee. The light brown-furred female accepted it, Harrow making room as she stood next to Joseph.
Pan handed him a tough leather strip as wide as his palm. Seems like she saw the problem before he did.
“Open up,” he prodded, placing the leather between Faye’s teeth. “This is going to fucking suck. We don’t have anything to numb you, so you need to stay as still as possible, okay? I’ll be here the whole time.”
The Wraith nodded, staring at him for a moment before closing her eyes in acceptance, her grip on the pup firming.
“Want me to take the wolf?”
She lightly shook her head, him exhaling hesitantly in response. Idee readied herself, looking to him for confirmation, Pan holding Faye’s ankle flat to the bed.
“You’re good,” he responded, pressing an arm to Faye’s chest and hips to hold her down.
The deep gold-furred female managed a quiet muffled groan of pain as the quill pierced her flesh.
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He entered the hub, dropping himself on the couch and ignoring the sweat on his brow. He had only just managed to get the blood off of his hands after Idee finished, but it was still staining his clothing. Pan was off to rinse it out of her fur while Faye slept off her exhaustion. As far as they could tell, she had avoided any infection thanks to Raine half-dragging the female back to them as quickly as she did. The wolf pup was staying with her for now, since—even in her sleep—she refused to let it go. The little guy didn’t seem to be complaining, so they just left it where it was comfortable. Ferra would be by later to check it out, apparently, and he didn’t see a reason to complain; she was their animal expert.
Scarlet offered him some tea, the warm liquid whetting his pallet that had since dried. Sahari had checked on them during the process, leaving to keep anyone who had questions in the loop. Given that half the damn pack either saw or heard about the Grand Hunter running like a bat out of hell, pretty much everyone was worried. Either about some urgent threat that might befall them, or about one of the quiet servants they had grown used to seeing around.
Looked like the Wraiths had taken to offering small services and assistance to people who needed it when they didn’t have anything better to do, so the pack was curious about what had happened. It was a small blessing that the usual armour they wore when ‘on duty’ was covered by the cloaks, otherwise he would have more questions coming that he didn’t want answered.
Raine stood a few paces in front of him, her bowed posture holding a hint of fear under his unwavering stare. He waited for whoever else was going to show up for the report, Tel and Pan insisting that they be involved. Harrow followed behind the two entering from the facilities wing, either because she had gotten wrapped up in the whole thing, or because she wanted to be included.
Pan sat to his left, Tel taking a place behind him to remain standing. Harrow surprised him, her recently elusive presence firmly displaced as she dropped onto the couch to his right, her tail curling around his calf—not that she seemed to notice.
Given that both Tel and Pan trapped a limb or two with their tails regularly, he didn’t stop to put thought into it, the encapsulating appendage crossing him as a common occurrence.
“I don’t know how accurate it was, since she’s still pretty out of it, but Faye said one of those grey bear-deathtraps attacked some wolves before she stepped in to save the pup,” he opened, glancing at Scarlet. The almost black red-furred female was maintaining a surprisingly commanding presence, her attention laser-focused on Raine. The brown-furred Wraith kept her gaze fixed to the floor, too ashamed or nervous to move it.
“I apologize for her error in her stead,” she announced, the slightest of grip in her folded paws digging her claws into her skin. “The fault is also mine for not preventing her misstep. I will accept any punishment for our mistake.”
He exhaled heavily. “I’m not mad that you guys had an original thought, Raine. I’m worried about those iron-maiden-looking fucks being around again, and I’m concerned about you getting hurt.”
“Of course, sir. Forgive me for the arrogance of assuming your priorities.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose, Pan squeezing his thigh in support. Tel rested her head on his, the weight somehow comforting despite the grin at his annoyance. “We can talk about not getting yourselves killed later. Are you injured at all?”
Raine’s ear twitched. “No, sir. I am whole.”
“Good,” he sighed, nodding lightly. “That’s good. Faye’s patched up for now, but she’ll be under observation to keep on top of any possible infection. How did the ‘mission’ go?”
The Wraith perked up a bit, the conversation moving away from her perceived failure. She produced a satchel, pulling a rather thick stack of tablets from it and passing them to Scarlet, the latter ferrying them to Harrow. He thought it was an odd choice, but the orange-furred female started giving him an abbreviated translation of the text.
Line after line of transactions. What was offered and received, any debts and who owed them, as well as small notes about what should be brought next time. It was a comprehensive copy of the ledger that the trading caravan kept. His brows raised at the sheer density of information, and for them getting it from something he was only partially sure existed.
“You managed to get this much?” he asked in disbelief. “Jesus. Were you caught?”
Raine shook her head. “If we were to be seen by them, we would be nothing more than a stain against our Blademaster.”
Compliment or boasting, doing this much was damn impressive. Especially with just the two of them.
“Shit. Well, good fucking job, I guess,” he managed, still reeling a bit from the unintended scope of the task. Harrow continued to dig through the report, though stopped voicing it aloud. Joseph turned his attention back to the Wraith. “Anything else of note? Rumours?”
The Wraith grew pensive. “Though we returned partially through their return trip to Grand Hunter Pernel, we did overhear some conversations. There were discussions of other packs simply no longer occupying their settlements.”
He leaned forward in his seat, dislodging Tel as his elbows rested against his knees. “What do you mean?”
“Some of their usual trade locations were purportedly burned down, others merely abandoned. A few were apparently littered with corpses,” she explained more steadily. “From what we could gather, the reason they came to trade with our settlement at all is that the others along the way were in such states. It seems they intended to restock and head back out immediately to accommodate the loss in trading partners.”
He bit his lip as he thought about it, letting himself fall back against the couch.
“What do you guys think of it?” he asked with a glance to his mates. Pan seemed to be mirroring his own apprehension openly, while Tel kept a more serious expression.
“I believe there is something larger happening,” Tel concluded, taking a few seconds before returning to using him as a headrest. Pan nodded her agreement, but didn’t have much to add to it otherwise.
“It would explain how desperate they were for food,” he mused aloud, raising a brow when Harrow shifted to lean against him, one foot placed on the edge of the seat forcing the posture. “Any details of interest, Harrow?”
The orange-furred female jolted, only just stopping from moving her foot back to the floor before committing to using him as a backrest. She turned back-on fully, stretching her legs over the remainder of the seat and placing tablets she had finished with on her lap.
“It didn’t take very long for the methods you sold to propagate,” she responded, holding up a few of the tablets before laying them in their own pile. “Looks like Pernel has been spreading it around by buying some from places that have bows and snares to sell where they don’t.”
“Supply and demand, or arming people with the tools that would help them survive?”
“Hard to trade with the dead,” Harrow commented dryly, starting a new pile. He nodded in exaggerated fashion.
“What about the Atmo?”
She tapped the small stack she just started. “I’m trying to separate these by inventory type. Give me a bit.”
Deciding to trust the woman in charge of managing this kind of thing while she was on the ship, he glanced back to Raine, the female easily mistaken for a statue if not for the subtle sway of her breathing. “The grey-bear-thing. How far away is it?”
“Too close,” she responded firmly. “We did not get a chance to verify their numbers, but there was evidence of at least that singular beast making our territory its hunting ground.”
“Fuck,” he muttered through gritted teeth. “We’re going to need to hunt that thing down.”
Pan looked worried at the prospect, Harrow stiffened in her sorting. The Wraiths were the only ones who seemed completely at ease with the suggestion, Tel not so much as twitching. Harrow laid down the tablets she had yet to categorize, her gaze aimed at her lap.
“Joe, don’t think that taking one out is easy.”
“We have ranged weapons and more than a few people who can use them,” he pointed out with a breath. “Ideally, we go as a larger hunting party and take the damn thing down through sheer volume of fire.”
“Their skin is tough,” Harrow replied with a shake of her head, her ears pivoting back towards him. “I don’t know if our bows could pierce it as easily as we might like.”
He furrowed his brow. “So, what? Let it close in until it eats everything and starves us out? Until it thinks we look tasty?”
“I don’t know. I’m just saying that this won’t be as simple as firing a few arrows and patting ourselves on the back for a job well done.”
Joseph felt the stiffness of his brow start to hurt from how tight they were knitted. A deep breath centred his thoughts. “We’ll arrange an armoured hunting party soon. Better to take it down before it becomes an issue.”
The orange-furred female nodded, quickly leafing through the remaining tablets and only pulling two more out for the pile she indicated earlier.
“Here,” she said, tapping the stack. “These are records for trading Atmo.”
He suppressed the sigh when he genuinely tried to read the mess they called a language. “How many? Who bought them?”
She hesitated, reforming the copy of the ledger—sans the relevant tablets—and placing it on the floor. The remainder in paw, she held them up over her shoulder, Tel accepting it and going over the contents with an interested tilt of her head.
“From what I can see here, Pernel traded two hundred.”
“Two…” he squeaked, his eyes wide. “Two hundred?”
She nodded, pacing around the couch to stop in front of Pan. “It seems others heard of his willingness to barter for them. He accepted quite a few deals before selling them off again.”
“To who?”
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The door to the ship closed with a hiss, Willin shaking his head at Nav’s questioning gaze. “Nothing.”
Tech removed her CARDs, storing them in the weapons locker before shrugging off her AMR to place in its own unit. “Nothing living, anyway.”
“That bad?” Nav asked, deflating after yet another failed attempt to contact a settlement. The dark green-furred male stored his rifle, seating it into its receptacle with a click.
“Tell Comms to add another eighty to the count.”
“Four hundred eighty-two,” the purple-furred female supplied as she walked past Nav to enter the ship proper. Willin followed after, hanging his pistol holster on the side of his chair as he dropped into it.
“Thirty were covered in wounds, twenty or so were executed, twenty-five looked to have died of accumulated trauma, and the rest were found with singular cuts to the throat.”
“Not quite,” Tech remarked, interfacing with the systems. “Only eight of the ‘executed’ seem to have been done up close.”
“Sniper?” Comms asked as he entered the room, nodding his greetings and taking a seat at his station. Nav crossed their arms and leaned against the doorway as Tech Ops ran some numbers on her screen.
“Wounds are consistent with Anti Material Rifles, and debris suggest they took the ‘material’ part into consideration with their shots. There were a few holes in the buildings that didn’t quite get removed by the fires.”
“Covering evidence?” Willin mused aloud, receiving a thoughtful shake of her head.
“No, I don’t think so. My guess is that the buildings were already on fire when they did it, based on the splinters around the exit holes.”
Comms’ eyes widened in surprise. “Shooting through a burning building? That is rather impressive.”
“Blades?” Nav suggested. “Avalon is required to act against those who break the treaty, no?”
“Maybe,” Tech allowed tentatively. “If it
was them, then that would explain the lack of targets.”
Willin scratched at his ear, furrowing his brow as Comms ran another scan for any communications being made. Though a few suns had passed since they had unwittingly agreed to involve themselves in what was likely the first case of war that this planet had ever seen, nothing was being sent anywhere. Regardless, the male kept the scans regular, just in case.
Nav switched the foot they were resting on. “Why not just dispose of everyone breaking the treaty?”
“Maybe they did,” Comms commented, turning back to the conversation as the program ran in the background. “Blades typically function under strict conditions. If they removed anyone who was commanding the hostile action, then they did as required of them. The moment the attack stopped, they completed the terms of the treaty.”
“Or if the Grand Hunter here surrendered and allowed their pack to be subsumed,” Willin proposed, the others glancing at him in curiosity. He waved a paw dismissively. “If everyone in the conflict becomes a single pack, then any fighting from those who still disagree with it is now an internal dispute, thus outside of the purview of the Blades. Check the notes on Grand Hunter Toril and High Hunter Bratik.”
Tech’s eyes unfocused for a moment as she accessed the system. “Avalon is forbidden from interfering with internal politics. Toril was sheltered by Bratik. Since Bratik was from outside of Toril’s pack, it counted as acting against their right to manage their own affairs. Hasen was given a perfect reason to take over, and it forced Grand Hunter Trill to exile the both of them to adhere.” She looked around the room aimlessly as she thought, her eyes snapping to Willin when he spoke.
“And a perfect loop-hole to exploit. Toril loses his supporters, Trill loses a member of his command structure, and Hasen rises in power while leaving Avalon to grit their teeth.” He shook his head, both impressed and disgusted. “Once he attacks another pack, he just forces a vassalage and subsequently executes the new High Hunter for whatever reason he wants. The Blades can’t act on a technicality.”
“So Grand Hunter Pernel….”
Willin nodded at Comms' unfinished question. “In the count.”
“There was a bit of a weird holding area,” Tech added after a moment. “Seemed like somewhere to hold livestock, but even then, it was a bit big. I’m not sure what used to be there, but tracks suggest carts left with whatever it was not long before everything went down, so probably a trade caravan.”
“Well, at least someone made it out,” Nav sighed, pushing off the wall to resume their station. “Where are we going next?”
Willin toyed with the odd silver tablet in his paw, the two unrecognizable scripts curious and alien. “The only pack left before we see what all the fuss is about. Let’s pay a visit to Grand Huntress Sunundra. Hopefully she knows something we don’t.”
Next
A/N: Been a while since we’ve had a proper A/N, huh. Welp, here’s this one. Patreon is currently set to ‘per post’ because i made the account ages ago. Waiting on support to help me switch it to monthly, then I’ll post the Silva render i have. RR is at 30k views and 100 followers. Figured I’d ask how you guys are liking this arc, hows Willin’s team coming across, etc. Final note: I’m thinking about rewriting the first ‘book’ so i can get it edited and published! Problem: i have no fucking clue where to cut book 1, and editors are expensive. Where should book 1 end? All i know is that I’d prob end up adding extra chapters to it, as well as lengthening the OG chaps. RR is a ‘touch-up’, not a final product, so those don’t count! submitted by
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2023.06.05 11:27 Drakolf Dragon Rising- 17. Imperator:
It was a subtle thing, the way the people looked up at me as I led my Sorcerers out.
Hushed whispers, voices echoing the same thought, the same idea, the same truth. "That's Ruuk Stingtail, he's the Bold who will lead Kurtulmak's Empire."
I pretended not to notice, it was too soon for people to just start calling out to me as their future ruler, yet when I spoke with authority, their eyes widened as it seemed it validated everything they believed.
The word 'Imperator' was whispered, so when I finished fixing one of our farmers' tools, and he said, "Thank you, Imperator." I simply looked at him and spoke.
"I am not worthy to rule."
It always worked, their eyes always grew wider as their respect for me grew.
The Clerics of both Temples were working together to spread the news of the vision, and what I had learned. This led to the understanding that if both of us were working together, the situation must be dangerous.
I passed by Tudru, he was wearing the enchanted armor our Emperor had made. "Imperator." He said, his caused gasps, a member of the Council had recognized my authority. I nonetheless said, "I've said before, if the people want someone to rule, it can't be me."
"The people want
you." He said. "My Fighters are at the ready, Imperator."
I of course kept up my facade of refusal, always saying it loudly, publicly, but always visibly suppressing a smile, always making sure my serious expression brightened before I visibly pushed that brief moment of satisfaction away to remind them, "No, I am unworthy."
By the end of the first day, everyone in the city was aware of the danger, the people were busting their asses to get ready.
The second day, the people were more vocal, finding strength to say my title with more conviction, to bow their heads as I passed, dregs of uncertainty entered my voice as I repeated my refusal to lead.
A cadre of Sorcerers approached me, all of them relatively new.
"Imperator." They said clearly. "Seeing how you work to help our people, we wanted to help you any way we can, and... Well, we Awoke because of that. Direct us as you see fit."
There were fifteen of them, and when I directed them to seek our our God for guidance, they did so. As they walked away, as if in afterthought, I said, "And don't call me that!"
When I asked my Emperor about the Sorcerers, he said, "They asked about the collars, I told them that was only for those who endangered the Warren. As long as they serve their Imperator faithfully, they will not be bound so."
"Do you think I'll need a new outfit?" I asked jokingly.
"No." He said, smirking.
The third day, the Council gathered to address the Warren, the people were restless, many eyes were on me, rather than Tallyn.
"We have enough rations set aside for last us a week-" Tallyn started.
"Let the Imperator speak!" A voice yapped out.
Tallyn's eyes widened, he looked at me.
"I keep telling them, I'm not-"
That was when the riot broke out, voices clamored for me to take command, voices shouted that the Council was ineffectual, that a real leader was needed. The Paladins tried and failed to calm everyone down.
"SILENCE!" I roared, my voice amplified by the device Rekka had designed. All eyes were on me. "Release the Paladins." I said. The Paladins were released. "I have said time and time again, it is not my place to rule. Why do you insist on this?"
The voices blended together in a mass of sound, but I could hear things on occasion. "You are the only one who has the knowledge to lead!" "Even though you say that, we see you are honored, and want to rule!" "We all know you are the real power behind the Council!"
Now was the moment of truth. I raised my hand, and they quieted. "Only-" I said, my voice calm, yet commanding. "-if it is truly what the Warren wants, and my fellow Councilors agree." I looked at them, my allies knew what part they needed to play.
Kalith immediately stepped forward and knelt. "I have sworn time and time again, and yet you said not to, so I shall do it once more. I swear myself to you, Imperator, and the Empire of our God."
Kuvli walked forward next and knelt. "I owe my Barbarians this much, on their behalf, we swear to serve you, Imperator, and our Emperor, Kurtulmak."
Tudru approached and knelt. "I cannot ignore the will of the Warren." He said. "I swear my life to your Empire, Imperator."
Followed by Nakk, who simply said, "My Rogues are yours, Imperator."
Rekka appeared to hesitate before she approached and knelt. "It is the will of the Warren, Imperator Ruuk." She said.
Tatla was the first of the Temple of Bahamut's allies to defect. She gave Galax an apologetic look before she, took, approached and knelt. "There is no fighting against the people. I swear fealty, my Imperator."
This left Merti, Galax, and Tallyn. Galax approached first of the three. "And what, may I ask, will come of my Temple?" He asked.
The crowd roared, calling him disrespectful, some calling for his death, for the death of Bahamut's faithful.
"ENOUGH!" I snarled, before things could get out of hand. "Bahamut and my Master have had an agreement since before you were aware, this agreement was and still is the root of our alliance." I held my hand out. "I know you will not kneel before another God willingly, so I ask, as the alternative is losing our first and greatest Cleric, who is beholden to a God I still respect, will your Temple stand beside us as citizens of this inevitable Empire? Will you lend your wisdom, so we find the right path forward?"
"Answer me one thing, Ruuk Stingtail." He said. "Was there ever a moment you hesitated before claiming this title?"
"The title was thrust upon me." I replied honestly. "Refusal as this point would simply lead to unnecessary death. If I am to lead, let it be with peace."
He took my hand. "If I kneel, it is before Bahamut." He spoke.
"Then may Bahamut bless this day, that you do not need to."
I looked at Tallyn and Merti, they both approached, paused when they noticed the other moving, then approached together. Merti knelt.
"I swear, Imperator." She said.
Tallyn looked at Galax, then he drew his sword. I held my hand up before the crowd could begin screaming.
"If your desire is my death, brother, make it quick." I said.
Tallyn stabbed his sword into the stage and knelt. "Before Bahamut, my God, I swear fealty to your Empire so long as you follow the tenets of the Temple, for I swear to you, if you walk the path of a tyrant, I will slay you where you stand."
I smiled. "I will hold you to that, brother." I replied. "Very well, I accept the title of Imperator, and promised to lead everyone to the best of my ability."
The cheers were far more glorious than I could have anticipated, the Level I gained as a result only made it sweeter, as did the spell that I gained, that would allow me to transform anyone I chose into something else.
I wondered, briefly, how the enemies would react if I turned one of their own into a Kobold, and made him believe he was surrounded by enemies?
"As my first act as Imperator." I said, addressing the Warren. "The Council will remain in place." Everyone was surprised. "What? Why throw away skilled leaders? Their expertise will ensure the continued prosperity of our Empire. Tudru, as the one with the most military experience out of all of us, I am naming you my general. You will be in charge of establishing a formal military hierarchy, make sure any and all soldiers are willing volunteers. I expect nothing but the best."
"Yes, Imperator." He saluted by putting his fist to his heart.
"I like that, that will be our salute." I said. "Galax, as the High Priest of the God of Justice, I want you to codify our way of life into a formal list of laws. We may have already lived by them, but if there ever comes a time when we have visitors, they must have those laws easily accessible."
"I will do so under the guidance of Bahamut." He answered.
"To that effect, I am making this a formal order. Do whatever is necessary to achieve the level needed to bring back our dead." He nodded
"Tallyn, you will be in charge of locating any and all potential Paladins. I want all prospective servants of our Gods to be educated in both the teachings of Bahamut and Kurtulmak, If they are incapable of becoming either a Cleric or Paladin, ensure if they still wish to serve, that they have a place in the Temple of their choosing."
"I will do this." He said, saluting me. I smiled, he didn't even hesitate.
"Merti, Tatla, you both will continue your prior duties. I want sustainable industry to be the rule of law in this Empire, on which note, Nakk, if there comes a time that we are able to reach beyond our borders, I want you to ensure any trade or commerce that is necessary will be done correctly."
"Yes, Imperator." He replied, saluting.
"Kuvli, you will be Tudru's direct subordinate. I'm sorry, but I can't think of anything you can do that wouldn't be redundant."
"Absolutely no problem, Imperator. I prefer it that way." He replied, grinning.
"Rekka." She jumped startled by my addressing her. "I want your Artificers grouped based on their competences. Armor and weapons will be managed by armorers and weaponsmiths. Infrastructure will be managed by the appropriate people, magic items will be enchanted by any enchanters... Do what is necessary to ensure all of our bases are covered."
"Yes, Imperator." She saluted as well.
"Kalith, I still have no fucking idea how your magic works." I admitted.
He laughed. "If you have no command, I will defer to our Emperor." He said.
I nodded. "Sorcerer Goss. Approach the stage."
Goss approached, he looked terrified. "As our most competent Sorcerer, aside from myself, you will take my place on the Council."
"O-of course, Imperator!" He stammered.
I faced the crowd, all 70000 of them.
"Tomorrow." I said. "Each and every one of you will go into the mines, and you will enter the fortress our God and Emperor has built with his own two hands. I will remain behind with him, with Galax joining us. The day after, we may confront another God, one who might want us all dead.
When we survive, those of us who can fight will ensure nobody ever dares to attack us again."
I paused, briefly considering how to finish before settling on simply saluting and saying, "For the glory of our God and Emperor!"
I smiled as my subjects cheered at my words.
I let
my Council address them, made it clear that their word was second only to mine, and that they had my authority. The gathering proceeded as originally expected.
The rest of the day was spent getting things ready for the transition of power, we would need a flag, a symbol for our nation, names were thrown about- unsurprisingly Darastrixthurhi was tossed about, which I unilaterally decreed would be our name.
The next morning, my Emperor stepped out, the people were silent as he stood before them, with me stood beside him.
"My loyal subjects." He spoke.
"Bathaldraynori di Darastrixthurhi. Ours is the Empire that was once promised, the Empire that was cruelly destroyed. Tomorrow, my ancient and hated foe is likely to come, and it is likely he will seek to recreate that cruel and tasteless prank of his- the genocide of our people."
His voice remained calm, even though his face twisted with hatred and malice. "Tomorrow, in honor of my Imperator, I shall meet him with compromise. I shall never forgive him, not for what he has done. Tomorrow, I will prove that a broken system cannot be salvaged by playing by its rules. Meditate on this, as you head below, to the safety I provide and promise. Today, I wield strength I did not on that day. Not one of you will die."
Our people, our subjects, walked into the mines carrying only what they needed, while Kurtulmak and Galax walked with me south, to the gates that separated us from the world.
I felt the high caliber bullet strike me, felt my bone break before Galax healed me. No other shots came, at least until they brought out the rocket launcher. The rocket launched and flew toward us, one magic missile later, and it was destroyed mid-flight.
"Bring forth your commander." My Emperor spoke. "So long as you do not fire upon us, they will not be harmed.
There was a loud ruckus on the other side, shortly before a man in military fatigues strode toward us, a shotgun in hand. He stopped five feet away from us, aimed his gun at us, and said, "One wrong move, and I'll shoot." His voice was the same as the gruff voice I had heard. A patch on his fatigues read 'Mendoza'.
"My name is Kurtulmak." My Emperor spoke. Mendoza tensed. "This is Ruuk, my Imperator, and first of my faithful." I saluted. "And this is Galax, first Cleric of Bahamut, King of the Metallic Dragons, Justicemaker, and so on."
"Why are you here?" Mendoza asked.
"To tell you that by the end of tomorrow, your entire garrison will be dead." My Emperor spoke. Mendoza pulled the trigger, my Emperor caught the blast with his hand and dropped the lead pellets onto the ground. "I am aware you seek to bring my nemesis here, that you intend for him to recreate the injustice he delivered unto my people. Understand, when I overcome him, my Empire will march upon your nation, those who do not kneel in recognition of our authority will be executed, and it will only be the leniency of Bahamut if they breathe again. Ruuk, our parting gift."
I nodded.
"Slemon thirku rekisix bathaldraynor tairais." The moment the words were uttered, he immediately shrank, his gear melding into his body, until he was just a Kobold like us. He let out a terrified screech.
"What did you do to me!?" He screeched.
"The only way you will survive is if you enter our town and accept this gift." Kurtulmak replied. "Otherwise, can you trust your soldiers to keep you alive?"
I could hear the horrified muttering above. We turned around and walked away.
"That was cruel and unnecessary." Galax said.
"Of course." I replied. "But it is deserved for the anguish we have been through."
I looked back, the gate had closed, and their commander was sealed inside, begging to be let out, "Don't leave me in here with these monsters!" He screeched.
I wondered what would happen first: Would they shoot him, or would they figure out what I did?
[Navigation for 'Dragon Rising'-
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2023.06.05 11:22 P5ndaa [US-TX] [H] 10217 Diagon Alley, 21050 Studio NISB, 10225 UCS R2-D2 NISB, 7052 Tripod Invader NISB, 75142 Homing Spider Droid, 75015 Corporate Alliance Tank, other used sets and figures. [W] PayPal, 21051 Tokyo Architecture
Pictures Hello there! I've got a longish list of sets/figs for sale today. All prices do not include shipping, and many of them are negotiable, especially if you would like to purchase multiple items, so shoot me your offers! I'm looking for Paypal for all of them, but would possibly be interested in trading for a 21051 Tokyo Architecture Skyline set.
Send me a chat (or PM, whatever is easier for you) if you're interested in something below, thanks!
NISB:
21050 Studio (Still sealed in original brown box from LEGO) - $415
75145 Eclipse Fighter - $50
40220 Mini London Bus - $10
40252 Mini VW Beetle - $30
7051 Tripod Invader (The box was opened yrs ago, then retaped) - $85
21044 Paris - $ Trade towards 21051 Tokyo
75001 Republic Troopers vs Sith Troopers - $70
76006 Iron Man: Extremis Sea Port Battle - $42
40484 Santa's Front Yard x2 (second not shown in pictures) - $16 each
31088 Deep Sea Creatures - $15
10217 Diagon Alley (this set isn't pictured, but am happy to provide photos. 100% Complete, bags 2 and 3 are sealed, and bag 1 is opened. Includes all parts, figures, instructions, and box in excellent condition) - $400
10225 UCS R2-D2 (this set also isn't pictured, but am happy to provide photos. NISB) - $250
Used:
7964 Republic Frigate (no figures, instructions included in great shape) - $190
8052 Container Truck (should be 100% complete from the looks of it) - $100
8097 Slave I (3rd Edition) (the ship looks to be 100% complete, includes instructions and all figures except for bossk. I will find Han's hair, dw.) - $90
75103 First Order Transporter (100% complete, great condition) - $95 (I have the box if you want it)
75142 Homing Spider Droid (100% complete, excellent condition) - $90
75015 Corporate Alliance Tank (missing clone, and jango looks like new, except he does have one crack, looks perfect for display though) - $80
75172 Y-Wing Starfighter (just the ship, instructions, and box if you want it, may cost more to ship though) - $60
75261 20th Anniversary Clone Scout Walker (100% complete, all figures are in excellent condition, they were just displayed) - $65
75089 Geonosis Troopers (100% complete, figs are perfect) - $60
7914 Mandalorian Battle Pack (I have the parts to complete it, so 100% with all figs in perfect condition) - $42
75153 AT-ST Walker (100% complete, with driver fig and instructions) (also have the box if you want it) - $45
7052 UFO Abduction (should be 100% complete, light may not work) - $40
41486 Captain Phasma Brickhead (100% complete w/instructions) - $35
75100 First Order Snowspeeder (100%) - $35
75168 Yoda's Jedi Starfighter (build complete w/R2) - $33
7630 Front-End Loader (100%) - $30
7915 Imperial V-Wing Starfighter (100%) - $26
6207 A-Wing Fighter (100% with partially new sticker sheet) - $25
6207 A-Wing fighter (this second one should be complete as well, but doesn't include instructions) - $24
8085 Freeco Speeder (100%) - $23
911612 Aaklay - Mini Foil Pack (100% complete aaklay build) - $10
Minifigures: sw1027 Lando Calrissian (20th anniversary) (new, includes stand and gun) - $60
sw0332 Eeth Koth (Good used condition, a little wear on horns) - $40
sw0284 Aayla Secura (little wear on headpiece) - $25
sw0131 Kashyyyk Trooper (Just torso and legs, excellent condition) - $40
sw1031 Imperial Shadow Trooper (new) - $14
sw1032 Han Solo 20th Anniversary (new, includes blaster and stand!) - $9
sw1022 Princess Leia 20th Anniversary (excellent) - $15
sw1029 Darth Vader (20th anniversary) (excellent except head and legs have a bit of scuffing) - $17
sw0377 Arc Trooper (missing pauldron, kama, backpack) - $20
sw0118 Clone Trooper V-Wing Pilot Phase 2 (no cracks/yellowing, but arms have nicks) - $5
sw0133 Mace Windu Light-Up Lightsaber (No cape, lightsaber, battery needs to be replaced. Face has scratches, priced accordingly) - $20
sw0507 Endor Rebel Trooper (new) - $8
sw0213 Astromech Droid, R2-Q5 (excellent) - $6
sw0277 Darth Vader (like new, no cape) - $10
sw0793 Y-wing/U-Wing Rebel Pilot (excellent) - $6.5
sw0320 Geonosian (excellent) - $4.5
sw0257a Luke Skywalker Celebration (excellent) - $4
sw0677 Rey (new) - $4
sw0040b Royal Guard (excellent) - $5
sw0414 Sith Trooper (excellent) - $6.5
sw0600 Security Droid Straight Arm (print is excellent) - $4.5
sw0156a Mouse Droid - $0.65
I am also currently rebuilding a number of older sets, such as 3677, 3182, 3181, 3179, 7937, 7641, 9446, 7749, 7239, 7307, 7938, 4645, 4867, 4841, 9442, 9441. Most of them should be 95-100% complete with figures & instructions. If you're interested in one of these, let me know and I'll set it aside for you.
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2023.06.05 11:04 Dr_Apperpixion If You See It, It Is Too Late
I never met my birth parents. They both died on a job when I was a baby, and I went into foster care. I didn’t have any interest in knowing anything about them; my adoptive parents are the ones who raised me.
However, everything changed a week ago when a group of men came knocking at my door. They wore what looked like military uniforms, but instead of the usual green, they wore a distinct red color instead. They loaded me, along with my foster parents into an unmarked matching red van. We were rushed to a farmhouse on the opposite side of Washington where the facility was heavily guarded with intimidating men and unfamiliar machines that appeared like they required several men to operate.
Being an IT major, I had no knowledge nor interest in these things. I’m not a runner, fighter or a strategist, so I couldn’t fathom what they wanted from me.
They relentlessly interrogated me for three days, bombarding me with questions and then, when they concluded that I was blissfully unaware, intimidated me with frightening information. Dumbfounded, I soaked in every ounce of knowledge they offered me. The new knowledge I gained made me see my parents in a new terrifying light. I couldn’t help but feel more resentment, adding on to the existing resentment I harboured. My parents not only betrayed themselves, but me as well and part of me feared that I would never be safe again. I couldn’t help but feel manipulated. They were long gone, but their past still controlled my fate.
I was eventually uprooted to a secondary protective facility, one in which I was not permitted to know the location of. For my own safety, they assured me. Once settled, they supplied me with new electronics and destroyed my old ones. They warned me that I was to stay under the radar, completely untraceable. Again, for my own protection. I was confident that given my knowledge of IT, software engineering and cyber security, I would remain unseen and untraceable to anyone who might be hunting me.
Now that I am sure I am safe, I can finally write this message and warn anyone connected to the initial bloodlines involved. It is crucial for my message to reach you.
The story begins with my biological grandfather. He worked for a branch of the government closely related to NASA. Following the moon landing there was a great deal of classified developments that the population was oblivious to. The department my grandfather worked for protecting the world against extra-terrestrial threats or extra-terrestrial terrorism as they described it.
Paranoia gripped them after the moon landing and they took drastic measures to prepare. Five years later, they deciphered the first communications and signals from frequencies previously unknown to them. These signals were so powerful that they destroyed entire systems, disrupted the power grid and took down entire radio stations. This special branch of government discovered they could tap into these signals which revealed that our galaxy has been under constant surveillance. This was ironically discovered by extra-terrestrials working within this branch, tasked to monitor and prevent extra-terrestrial terrorism on a much larger scale.
At this point in their story, the soldiers were reluctant to divulge more. Insisting that they already revealed too much. But I demanded full transparency, refusing to cooperate with their equivocation. It was essential that I know my involvement in these matters. So, they continued, placing a huge box in front of me, overflowing with papers. They swiftly unveiled its contents to me, Stacks of documents and old tapes they tossed onto the table, one after the another.
The documents contained, amongst others, details of weapons the organisation, known as ESA were crafting and testing along with formulas to create immensely powerful weapons. They used advanced calculations to try and manufacture better equipment that could be sent up to space. They were doing this undisclosed, to monitor and learn as much as they could.
The ESA spent millions designing and building a spacecraft to contain their equipment, if the situation ever called for it. It is still a work in progress. All of this is actively happening, the documents and footage stamped up until a week ago.
I opened a document with a list of classified individuals who had this information. Presidents, EU members, a handful of the rich and powerful, who used this information to design and construct underground bunkers, granting that, if anything were to ever happen, they’d be prepared. These aren’t a new concept though, the extremely rich and powerful have been known to publicly sponsor new technological advancements. Well some may think this gave them the upper hand, it eventually proved their foolishness.
The following is what I saw in the most crucial videos:
Video 1: dated 1975 The video opens in an empty cell, appearing to be a reinforced holding chamber. At first, the room is dark, then the spotlights switch on, illuminating the centre of the room. Now in the light, I could clearly make out what looked like a reinforced metal wall with chains protruding from it. The focus shifts to the back of the room where a large door opens and something is dragged in a sheet, concealing its identity, and tied down with thick chains. The video ends.
Video 2: June 1975 I saw about 20 armed men entered the room and start to unwrap the sheet from what they hauled in. After several minutes of unwrapping, the identity of the thing they brought in is revealed.
There seemed to be a glitch in the recording, at different points in the video the screen was covered in static. The sound was muted, and the figure was hard to make out. It appeared that the creature was attempting to change shape, vibrating as if to phase into a different shape. Despite its best attempts, it remained unsuccessful and reverted back to its original form. .
Video 3: the very next day wnd June 1975
The video opens with the creature fully in focus. Within the 18 hours of footage, the creature is constantly seen attempting to change form. It fails every time, but that doesn’t prevent it from trying again. It looks like a blur, occasionally a second head or what appears to be a human hand. It’s apparent the creature has shapeshifting abilities.
The next 200 videos are identical. To the naked eye, it seemed like a loop. But it wasn’t. The creature was, however, relentless in its attempt to free itself or escape.
Video 204: October 1975
This time the alien appeared to be asleep, head limp and no movement. This video had sound, but it was accompanied by a high pitch buzz that made my ears hurt. At the six-hour mark, the faint cry of a baby can be heard before gradually escalating into full-blown screaming.
At first I suspected that one of the scientists had brought their child along, but the agents assured me the crying was coming from the creature. As the video progresses, the cries grow louder and more demanding, eventually accompanied by a deep voice. Close to the end of the video, 22 hours in, multiple voices begin to scream simultaneously, causing everything to shake.
The documents show that, after this incident, the cage was reinforced. The next few videos are static, proving that the creature has the uncanny ability to manipulate video and disrupt frequencies.
Video 340 February 1982
The creature, with its brown discoloration, possessed crocodile like scales and an eagle like head, but it was entirely reptilian in nature. It stood at a whopping 12 feet tall and was covered in an unknown slime like substance.
The chains were substantially thicker than they were years earlier, and the cage has been fortified. It looked like a different room altogether.
The agents explained that the creature got loose and attacked 12 soldiers, absorbing them into itself instead of merely killing or eating them.
The creature was taken to Nevada, close to the desert, where a strong armoured underground structure had been constructed, far from civilization. The facility has been equipped with high level security precautions which allowed sections of the building to be sealed off and rigged to explode, guaranteeing that, if necessary, the building would collapse in on itself, trapping the creature within its cage, underneath the rubble.
The creature mirrored the image I conjured up in my head when I pictured the devil; brown, scaly, a demonic voice. The eyes were its most terrifying feature, shaped like that of a reptilian, but blood red. I counted 4 horns on its head, and it bore a pair of nasty fangs. Its feet bore the resemblance of a dinosaur, but it lacked a tale. Once the creature was no longer phasing in and out, it settled on a more consistent appearance, one that was easier to recognize.
Video 341 February 1982
This video marked the first appearance of my grandfather. He entered, along with four other men in lab coats, carrying a large syringe, approximately the size of my arm. He stuck it into the beast’s heart, causing it to instantly fall into a deep sleep. He proceeded to connect various machines onto the slumbering creature, attaching electrodes to its head and chest which were linked to a sizeable computer or something that resembled a computer. The video cuts off after this, leaving us to guess what occurred next.
Video 343 February 1982 The lights in the room were far brighter than before, and it once again lacked the presence of sound. The reason for this remained unknown.
Within the room stood a table filled with an assortment of equipment that appeared to be severely damaged. The lights flickered at intervals, and the creature began to phase in and out once more. This made it difficult to distinguish its appearance amid the static moments and blurred movements. The scientists observed the creature a safe distance away.
The scientists were relying on a certain frequency they discovered to keep the creature at bay. It seemed to produce positive results for the next few videos.
The videos that followed held a similar pattern. The creature remained silent, wired to machines while people came in and out taking notes or the occasional blood or slime sample. The creature remained composed, not once attempting to shift or escape again.
According to the agents’ records, everything proceeded as planned. My grandfather welcomed his first son, my father in 1975, he subsequently resumed his project until his resignation in 2008 when he was 55. A year later, he had a fatal heart attack, my grandmother following soot. My father was 34.
My father and his younger brother began working for ESA in 2004, when they were 28 and 24. New technological advancements introduced better cameras and electronic equipment for testing purposes. Since the technology became so advanced, their visits to the cage became as infrequent as once a week, or even less often. With new needles, enhanced equipment and upgraded data collection, the project transferred to electronic records ushering changes in the filing system.
While we waited for my transportation, they shared more classified documents. According to the notes, the once wild and violent creature was now unrecognisably tame and responsive, even answering questions. It remained unclear whether they had intentionally provoked it or stumbled upon a means to subdue it.
The circumstances surrounding my birth were strange. My dad impregnated a college classmate, and they made the mutual decision to put me up for adoption since neither of them had the desire to raise a child. My mother was studying biology and my father, a young genius physicist that found it hard to understand basic human interaction as it was. According to my foster parents, I was born in 2000, but the data I was presented proved I was born two years prior. This revelation had a more profound effect on me than anything else I’d seen.
Regardless, I was immediately given up for adoption and my existence was all but forgotten about. My adoptive parents moved to Iowa, and that’s where I lived up until 2018 when I left for Harvard. I always wondered what my birth parents were like. My adoptive parents told me I was a genius and speculated that I inherited my brain from somewhere. It’s an uncanny feeling; the knowledge that every aspect of my life was monitored.
The videos documenting the creature continued for the next 6 years. It became routine, apart from the indistinct chatter from the observing scientists and other government employees. There were no other sounds, incidents or noteworthy occurrences.
The tests revealed that the creature’s biology was predominantly alien, with no genetic material in common with humans. The scientists highlighted the alarming fact that the creature’s DNA was ever changing, resulting in frequent sample collection and analysis.
They concluded that, the creature was still a baby at the time of capture, which made it easier to contain. They did, however, underestimate its shocking growth rate which resulted in the deaths of the 12 soldiers’ years prior. At the time, it was still in its adolescent phase. Further research uncovered that the creature had the unique ability to absorb the genetic material of the men it came into contact with. The more humans it absorbed, the more diverse its gene pool became. A portion of the genes obtained gradually became more similar to those observed in humans. It’s as if the creature dove into an immense pool of genes and, as it absorbed more humans, its genetic makeup gradually began to adopt more human like qualities. Although difficult to comprehend at first, the basic explanation is that with every absorption of genetic information, the creature’s genetic composition seemed to evolve, storing human qualities within its own gene and gradually becoming more human-like That is my understanding of it.
Which brings me to the final video they have. Prepare yourselves.
Video: mov5078436b The creature behaved normally before viewing was disrupted by static. Among the sudden legion of voices, it echoed my father’s name, simultaneously expanding in size which causes the surroundings to convulse. Alarms resounded, piercing the silence as the creature tugged at its chains, cracking the floor ceiling in its attempt to break free. An ear splitting roar escaped its mouth as hordes of armoured soldiers rushed the cage, massive tasers in hand. They zapped the creature at maximum voltage as it continued to roar, lights flickering excessively. The camera feed is interrupted again by bouts of static.
A second group arrived, armed heavily with guns, increasing the crowd to a total of 30. The gunfire was so severe that it affected the video’s audio. One of the chains bound to the roof of the cage had already broken loose by the time the third group of soldiers arrived. This group carried a machine emitting bursts of fire, which had no effect on the creature aside from antagonizing it. It releases a powerful blast from its hand, causing the room to tremble which shattered the bulletproof glass into millions of pieces and sent the men flying across the room. Both of the creature’s hands were now free, and it began to morph.
Finally, a third group arrived in heavily armoured suits, unlike anything I’ve ever seen before. They wielded lasers and what appeared to be a concentrated lightning gun. I was grateful they hadn’t made use of nuclear weapons which would have wiped everyone out. After every attempt, the creature remained standing. Now it was his turn.
The creature freed itself from the remaining shackles and unleashed a blast with both its hands. All that was left of the solders was a gruesome mess of blood where they stood. The air filled with a haunting scream that echoed throughout the halls. The creature released a menacing growl in the form of words that sent chills down my spine, “Dennis McCarthy”, my father’s name.
Right before the camera blacked out, I could have sworn he was in the brink of morphing into a human form, but the recording was cut short by the thunderous detonation of explosions that sent the building into destruction, burying the truth within its rubble.
The scientists, including my dad, were taken by the ESA (extra-terrestrial security agency) and hidden in a heavily guarded underground haven. They were issued new identities and relocated, which isn’t a new concept for the government.
As far as the drones’ visual feed could capture, the entire operation was terminated, leaving behind the collapsed and buried ruins of a facility that was once fully functional. It was under strict surveillance for any signs of life, but as the years rolled by, complacency set in, compromising their once strict security measures.
My father, uncle and the rest of the scientists assumed new lives and identities. As far as the rest of the world was concerned, they were dead.
In 2010, an unexpected interruption occurred. Reports indicated that the drones simultaneously malfunctioned, and the video feed erupted into static. A team arrived at the site to find it disrupted, all the drones lay in scattered heaps across the landscape.
Before anyone could investigate or react, all communication with the agents safeguarding the scientists was abruptly terminated. One be one, the connections were severed, leaving them permanently unreachable. When they reached my father’s safe house, they were greeted with his spine-chilling absence. He had vanished without so much as a trace that he had ever been there to begin with—no signs of struggle or any shred of evidence left behind. He was lost in an infinite void of mystery. The only indication that something was amiss was the eerie blue glow invading the monitors moments before blackout. The only accurate word for it would be ‘suction’, leading the team to believe that they had been absorbed. It remained a speculation, though plausible enough to send waves of panic up their spines.
As we speak governments around the world have been swept up into the desperate search to locate the alien as well as training an elite group of drone pilots and soldiers in an attempt to confront and defeat the elusive entity. Furthermore, every effort at locating surviving relatives of the missing scientists, including my father, had fallen short. They too had vanished into an infinite cloud of mystery, not one left unscathed to provide answers.
Considering the site’s altered state, the complete destruction of the drones and the fact that the creature they had held captive was constantly evolving, they were profoundly aware of the unravelling truth.
I am the sole living descendent of the scientists that worked for ESA. The creature has made it his mission to eliminate any and all traces of their existence. This is the sole reason I was upended from my life and relocated to a heavily guarded facility, and this is the reason I feel compelled to share their stories.
I couldn’t comprehend why the creature would hunt me since I didn’t share the sins of my father, but I felt paranoid and vigilant regardless. I couldn’t help but feel compelled to look into the disappearances myself, perhaps due to some lingering hopes that the information was wrong. My pursuit for answers turned up nothing, not even social media accounts. It was as if any trace of their existence was utterly obliterated, there was no digital footprint left.
The reason I am now convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that my life is in danger is because I have started catching glimpses of subtle movements in my peripheral, a shadowy figure lurking around the premises, disruptions in the signal of my appliances, even the phone I am using right now.
Call me foolish for even relying on the very technology that might lead to my demise, but I felt compelled to warn anyone else who might be a descendent of the team that worked for ESA: project corrosion.
If you’re aware then heed my words and flee. If you are unaware, observe the news for any sudden or unexplained disappearances, and I regret to inform you but, if you come across the creature then it’s too late.
Stay safe my friends
submitted by
Dr_Apperpixion to
shortscarystories [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 11:03 Dr_Apperpixion If You See It, It Is Too Late
I never met my birth parents. They both died on a job when I was a baby, and I went into foster care. I didn’t have any interest in knowing anything about them; my adoptive parents are the ones who raised me.
However, everything changed a week ago when a group of men came knocking at my door. They wore what looked like military uniforms, but instead of the usual green, they wore a distinct red color instead. They loaded me, along with my foster parents into an unmarked matching red van. We were rushed to a farmhouse on the opposite side of Washington where the facility was heavily guarded with intimidating men and unfamiliar machines that appeared like they required several men to operate.
Being an IT major, I had no knowledge nor interest in these things. I’m not a runner, fighter or a strategist, so I couldn’t fathom what they wanted from me.
They relentlessly interrogated me for three days, bombarding me with questions and then, when they concluded that I was blissfully unaware, intimidated me with frightening information. Dumbfounded, I soaked in every ounce of knowledge they offered me. The new knowledge I gained made me see my parents in a new terrifying light. I couldn’t help but feel more resentment, adding on to the existing resentment I harboured. My parents not only betrayed themselves, but me as well and part of me feared that I would never be safe again. I couldn’t help but feel manipulated. They were long gone, but their past still controlled my fate.
I was eventually uprooted to a secondary protective facility, one in which I was not permitted to know the location of. For my own safety, they assured me. Once settled, they supplied me with new electronics and destroyed my old ones. They warned me that I was to stay under the radar, completely untraceable. Again, for my own protection. I was confident that given my knowledge of IT, software engineering and cyber security, I would remain unseen and untraceable to anyone who might be hunting me.
Now that I am sure I am safe, I can finally write this message and warn anyone connected to the initial bloodlines involved. It is crucial for my message to reach you.
The story begins with my biological grandfather. He worked for a branch of the government closely related to NASA. Following the moon landing there was a great deal of classified developments that the population was oblivious to. The department my grandfather worked for protecting the world against extra-terrestrial threats or extra-terrestrial terrorism as they described it.
Paranoia gripped them after the moon landing and they took drastic measures to prepare. Five years later, they deciphered the first communications and signals from frequencies previously unknown to them. These signals were so powerful that they destroyed entire systems, disrupted the power grid and took down entire radio stations. This special branch of government discovered they could tap into these signals which revealed that our galaxy has been under constant surveillance. This was ironically discovered by extra-terrestrials working within this branch, tasked to monitor and prevent extra-terrestrial terrorism on a much larger scale.
At this point in their story, the soldiers were reluctant to divulge more. Insisting that they already revealed too much. But I demanded full transparency, refusing to cooperate with their equivocation. It was essential that I know my involvement in these matters. So, they continued, placing a huge box in front of me, overflowing with papers. They swiftly unveiled its contents to me, Stacks of documents and old tapes they tossed onto the table, one after the another.
The documents contained, amongst others, details of weapons the organisation, known as ESA were crafting and testing along with formulas to create immensely powerful weapons. They used advanced calculations to try and manufacture better equipment that could be sent up to space. They were doing this undisclosed, to monitor and learn as much as they could.
The ESA spent millions designing and building a spacecraft to contain their equipment, if the situation ever called for it. It is still a work in progress. All of this is actively happening, the documents and footage stamped up until a week ago.
I opened a document with a list of classified individuals who had this information. Presidents, EU members, a handful of the rich and powerful, who used this information to design and construct underground bunkers, granting that, if anything were to ever happen, they’d be prepared. These aren’t a new concept though, the extremely rich and powerful have been known to publicly sponsor new technological advancements. Well some may think this gave them the upper hand, it eventually proved their foolishness.
The following is what I saw in the most crucial videos:
Video 1: dated 1975 The video opens in an empty cell, appearing to be a reinforced holding chamber. At first, the room is dark, then the spotlights switch on, illuminating the centre of the room. Now in the light, I could clearly make out what looked like a reinforced metal wall with chains protruding from it. The focus shifts to the back of the room where a large door opens and something is dragged in a sheet, concealing its identity, and tied down with thick chains. The video ends.
Video 2: June 1975 I saw about 20 armed men entered the room and start to unwrap the sheet from what they hauled in. After several minutes of unwrapping, the identity of the thing they brought in is revealed.
There seemed to be a glitch in the recording, at different points in the video the screen was covered in static. The sound was muted, and the figure was hard to make out. It appeared that the creature was attempting to change shape, vibrating as if to phase into a different shape. Despite its best attempts, it remained unsuccessful and reverted back to its original form. .
Video 3: the very next day wnd June 1975
The video opens with the creature fully in focus. Within the 18 hours of footage, the creature is constantly seen attempting to change form. It fails every time, but that doesn’t prevent it from trying again. It looks like a blur, occasionally a second head or what appears to be a human hand. It’s apparent the creature has shapeshifting abilities.
The next 200 videos are identical. To the naked eye, it seemed like a loop. But it wasn’t. The creature was, however, relentless in its attempt to free itself or escape.
Video 204: October 1975
This time the alien appeared to be asleep, head limp and no movement. This video had sound, but it was accompanied by a high pitch buzz that made my ears hurt. At the six-hour mark, the faint cry of a baby can be heard before gradually escalating into full-blown screaming.
At first I suspected that one of the scientists had brought their child along, but the agents assured me the crying was coming from the creature. As the video progresses, the cries grow louder and more demanding, eventually accompanied by a deep voice. Close to the end of the video, 22 hours in, multiple voices begin to scream simultaneously, causing everything to shake.
The documents show that, after this incident, the cage was reinforced. The next few videos are static, proving that the creature has the uncanny ability to manipulate video and disrupt frequencies.
Video 340 February 1982
The creature, with its brown discoloration, possessed crocodile like scales and an eagle like head, but it was entirely reptilian in nature. It stood at a whopping 12 feet tall and was covered in an unknown slime like substance.
The chains were substantially thicker than they were years earlier, and the cage has been fortified. It looked like a different room altogether.
The agents explained that the creature got loose and attacked 12 soldiers, absorbing them into itself instead of merely killing or eating them.
The creature was taken to Nevada, close to the desert, where a strong armoured underground structure had been constructed, far from civilization. The facility has been equipped with high level security precautions which allowed sections of the building to be sealed off and rigged to explode, guaranteeing that, if necessary, the building would collapse in on itself, trapping the creature within its cage, underneath the rubble.
The creature mirrored the image I conjured up in my head when I pictured the devil; brown, scaly, a demonic voice. The eyes were its most terrifying feature, shaped like that of a reptilian, but blood red. I counted 4 horns on its head, and it bore a pair of nasty fangs. Its feet bore the resemblance of a dinosaur, but it lacked a tale. Once the creature was no longer phasing in and out, it settled on a more consistent appearance, one that was easier to recognize.
Video 341 February 1982
This video marked the first appearance of my grandfather. He entered, along with four other men in lab coats, carrying a large syringe, approximately the size of my arm. He stuck it into the beast’s heart, causing it to instantly fall into a deep sleep. He proceeded to connect various machines onto the slumbering creature, attaching electrodes to its head and chest which were linked to a sizeable computer or something that resembled a computer. The video cuts off after this, leaving us to guess what occurred next.
Video 343 February 1982 The lights in the room were far brighter than before, and it once again lacked the presence of sound. The reason for this remained unknown.
Within the room stood a table filled with an assortment of equipment that appeared to be severely damaged. The lights flickered at intervals, and the creature began to phase in and out once more. This made it difficult to distinguish its appearance amid the static moments and blurred movements. The scientists observed the creature a safe distance away.
The scientists were relying on a certain frequency they discovered to keep the creature at bay. It seemed to produce positive results for the next few videos.
The videos that followed held a similar pattern. The creature remained silent, wired to machines while people came in and out taking notes or the occasional blood or slime sample. The creature remained composed, not once attempting to shift or escape again.
According to the agents’ records, everything proceeded as planned. My grandfather welcomed his first son, my father in 1975, he subsequently resumed his project until his resignation in 2008 when he was 55. A year later, he had a fatal heart attack, my grandmother following soot. My father was 34.
My father and his younger brother began working for ESA in 2004, when they were 28 and 24. New technological advancements introduced better cameras and electronic equipment for testing purposes. Since the technology became so advanced, their visits to the cage became as infrequent as once a week, or even less often. With new needles, enhanced equipment and upgraded data collection, the project transferred to electronic records ushering changes in the filing system.
While we waited for my transportation, they shared more classified documents. According to the notes, the once wild and violent creature was now unrecognisably tame and responsive, even answering questions. It remained unclear whether they had intentionally provoked it or stumbled upon a means to subdue it.
The circumstances surrounding my birth were strange. My dad impregnated a college classmate, and they made the mutual decision to put me up for adoption since neither of them had the desire to raise a child. My mother was studying biology and my father, a young genius physicist that found it hard to understand basic human interaction as it was. According to my foster parents, I was born in 2000, but the data I was presented proved I was born two years prior. This revelation had a more profound effect on me than anything else I’d seen.
Regardless, I was immediately given up for adoption and my existence was all but forgotten about. My adoptive parents moved to Iowa, and that’s where I lived up until 2018 when I left for Harvard. I always wondered what my birth parents were like. My adoptive parents told me I was a genius and speculated that I inherited my brain from somewhere. It’s an uncanny feeling; the knowledge that every aspect of my life was monitored.
The videos documenting the creature continued for the next 6 years. It became routine, apart from the indistinct chatter from the observing scientists and other government employees. There were no other sounds, incidents or noteworthy occurrences.
The tests revealed that the creature’s biology was predominantly alien, with no genetic material in common with humans. The scientists highlighted the alarming fact that the creature’s DNA was ever changing, resulting in frequent sample collection and analysis.
They concluded that, the creature was still a baby at the time of capture, which made it easier to contain. They did, however, underestimate its shocking growth rate which resulted in the deaths of the 12 soldiers’ years prior. At the time, it was still in its adolescent phase. Further research uncovered that the creature had the unique ability to absorb the genetic material of the men it came into contact with. The more humans it absorbed, the more diverse its gene pool became. A portion of the genes obtained gradually became more similar to those observed in humans. It’s as if the creature dove into an immense pool of genes and, as it absorbed more humans, its genetic makeup gradually began to adopt more human like qualities. Although difficult to comprehend at first, the basic explanation is that with every absorption of genetic information, the creature’s genetic composition seemed to evolve, storing human qualities within its own gene and gradually becoming more human-like That is my understanding of it.
Which brings me to the final video they have. Prepare yourselves.
Video: mov5078436b The creature behaved normally before viewing was disrupted by static. Among the sudden legion of voices, it echoed my father’s name, simultaneously expanding in size which causes the surroundings to convulse. Alarms resounded, piercing the silence as the creature tugged at its chains, cracking the floor ceiling in its attempt to break free. An ear splitting roar escaped its mouth as hordes of armoured soldiers rushed the cage, massive tasers in hand. They zapped the creature at maximum voltage as it continued to roar, lights flickering excessively. The camera feed is interrupted again by bouts of static.
A second group arrived, armed heavily with guns, increasing the crowd to a total of 30. The gunfire was so severe that it affected the video’s audio. One of the chains bound to the roof of the cage had already broken loose by the time the third group of soldiers arrived. This group carried a machine emitting bursts of fire, which had no effect on the creature aside from antagonizing it. It releases a powerful blast from its hand, causing the room to tremble which shattered the bulletproof glass into millions of pieces and sent the men flying across the room. Both of the creature’s hands were now free, and it began to morph.
Finally, a third group arrived in heavily armoured suits, unlike anything I’ve ever seen before. They wielded lasers and what appeared to be a concentrated lightning gun. I was grateful they hadn’t made use of nuclear weapons which would have wiped everyone out. After every attempt, the creature remained standing. Now it was his turn.
The creature freed itself from the remaining shackles and unleashed a blast with both its hands. All that was left of the solders was a gruesome mess of blood where they stood. The air filled with a haunting scream that echoed throughout the halls. The creature released a menacing growl in the form of words that sent chills down my spine, “Dennis McCarthy”, my father’s name.
Right before the camera blacked out, I could have sworn he was in the brink of morphing into a human form, but the recording was cut short by the thunderous detonation of explosions that sent the building into destruction, burying the truth within its rubble.
The scientists, including my dad, were taken by the ESA (extra-terrestrial security agency) and hidden in a heavily guarded underground haven. They were issued new identities and relocated, which isn’t a new concept for the government.
As far as the drones’ visual feed could capture, the entire operation was terminated, leaving behind the collapsed and buried ruins of a facility that was once fully functional. It was under strict surveillance for any signs of life, but as the years rolled by, complacency set in, compromising their once strict security measures.
My father, uncle and the rest of the scientists assumed new lives and identities. As far as the rest of the world was concerned, they were dead.
In 2010, an unexpected interruption occurred. Reports indicated that the drones simultaneously malfunctioned, and the video feed erupted into static. A team arrived at the site to find it disrupted, all the drones lay in scattered heaps across the landscape.
Before anyone could investigate or react, all communication with the agents safeguarding the scientists was abruptly terminated. One be one, the connections were severed, leaving them permanently unreachable. When they reached my father’s safe house, they were greeted with his spine-chilling absence. He had vanished without so much as a trace that he had ever been there to begin with—no signs of struggle or any shred of evidence left behind. He was lost in an infinite void of mystery. The only indication that something was amiss was the eerie blue glow invading the monitors moments before blackout. The only accurate word for it would be ‘suction’, leading the team to believe that they had been absorbed. It remained a speculation, though plausible enough to send waves of panic up their spines.
As we speak governments around the world have been swept up into the desperate search to locate the alien as well as training an elite group of drone pilots and soldiers in an attempt to confront and defeat the elusive entity. Furthermore, every effort at locating surviving relatives of the missing scientists, including my father, had fallen short. They too had vanished into an infinite cloud of mystery, not one left unscathed to provide answers.
Considering the site’s altered state, the complete destruction of the drones and the fact that the creature they had held captive was constantly evolving, they were profoundly aware of the unravelling truth.
I am the sole living descendent of the scientists that worked for ESA. The creature has made it his mission to eliminate any and all traces of their existence. This is the sole reason I was upended from my life and relocated to a heavily guarded facility, and this is the reason I feel compelled to share their stories.
I couldn’t comprehend why the creature would hunt me since I didn’t share the sins of my father, but I felt paranoid and vigilant regardless. I couldn’t help but feel compelled to look into the disappearances myself, perhaps due to some lingering hopes that the information was wrong. My pursuit for answers turned up nothing, not even social media accounts. It was as if any trace of their existence was utterly obliterated, there was no digital footprint left.
The reason I am now convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that my life is in danger is because I have started catching glimpses of subtle movements in my peripheral, a shadowy figure lurking around the premises, disruptions in the signal of my appliances, even the phone I am using right now.
Call me foolish for even relying on the very technology that might lead to my demise, but I felt compelled to warn anyone else who might be a descendent of the team that worked for ESA: project corrosion.
If you’re aware then heed my words and flee. If you are unaware, observe the news for any sudden or unexplained disappearances, and I regret to inform you but, if you come across the creature then it’s too late.
Stay safe my friends
submitted by
Dr_Apperpixion to
nosleep [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 11:01 Dr_Apperpixion If You See It, It Is Too Late
I never met my birth parents. They both died on a job when I was a baby, and I went into foster care. I didn’t have any interest in knowing anything about them; my adoptive parents are the ones who raised me.
However, everything changed a week ago when a group of men came knocking at my door. They wore what looked like military uniforms, but instead of the usual green, they wore a distinct red color instead. They loaded me, along with my foster parents into an unmarked matching red van. We were rushed to a farmhouse on the opposite side of Washington where the facility was heavily guarded with intimidating men and unfamiliar machines that appeared like they required several men to operate.
Being an IT major, I had no knowledge nor interest in these things. I’m not a runner, fighter or a strategist, so I couldn’t fathom what they wanted from me.
They relentlessly interrogated me for three days, bombarding me with questions and then, when they concluded that I was blissfully unaware, intimidated me with frightening information. Dumbfounded, I soaked in every ounce of knowledge they offered me. The new knowledge I gained made me see my parents in a new terrifying light. I couldn’t help but feel more resentment, adding on to the existing resentment I harboured. My parents not only betrayed themselves, but me as well and part of me feared that I would never be safe again. I couldn’t help but feel manipulated. They were long gone, but their past still controlled my fate.
I was eventually uprooted to a secondary protective facility, one in which I was not permitted to know the location of. For my own safety, they assured me. Once settled, they supplied me with new electronics and destroyed my old ones. They warned me that I was to stay under the radar, completely untraceable. Again, for my own protection. I was confident that given my knowledge of IT, software engineering and cyber security, I would remain unseen and untraceable to anyone who might be hunting me.
Now that I am sure I am safe, I can finally write this message and warn anyone connected to the initial bloodlines involved. It is crucial for my message to reach you.
The story begins with my biological grandfather. He worked for a branch of the government closely related to NASA. Following the moon landing there was a great deal of classified developments that the population was oblivious to. The department my grandfather worked for protecting the world against extra-terrestrial threats or extra-terrestrial terrorism as they described it.
Paranoia gripped them after the moon landing and they took drastic measures to prepare. Five years later, they deciphered the first communications and signals from frequencies previously unknown to them. These signals were so powerful that they destroyed entire systems, disrupted the power grid and took down entire radio stations. This special branch of government discovered they could tap into these signals which revealed that our galaxy has been under constant surveillance. This was ironically discovered by extra-terrestrials working within this branch, tasked to monitor and prevent extra-terrestrial terrorism on a much larger scale.
At this point in their story, the soldiers were reluctant to divulge more. Insisting that they already revealed too much. But I demanded full transparency, refusing to cooperate with their equivocation. It was essential that I know my involvement in these matters. So, they continued, placing a huge box in front of me, overflowing with papers. They swiftly unveiled its contents to me, Stacks of documents and old tapes they tossed onto the table, one after the another.
The documents contained, amongst others, details of weapons the organisation, known as ESA were crafting and testing along with formulas to create immensely powerful weapons. They used advanced calculations to try and manufacture better equipment that could be sent up to space. They were doing this undisclosed, to monitor and learn as much as they could.
The ESA spent millions designing and building a spacecraft to contain their equipment, if the situation ever called for it. It is still a work in progress. All of this is actively happening, the documents and footage stamped up until a week ago.
I opened a document with a list of classified individuals who had this information. Presidents, EU members, a handful of the rich and powerful, who used this information to design and construct underground bunkers, granting that, if anything were to ever happen, they’d be prepared. These aren’t a new concept though, the extremely rich and powerful have been known to publicly sponsor new technological advancements. Well some may think this gave them the upper hand, it eventually proved their foolishness.
The following is what I saw in the most crucial videos:
Video 1: dated 1975 The video opens in an empty cell, appearing to be a reinforced holding chamber. At first, the room is dark, then the spotlights switch on, illuminating the centre of the room. Now in the light, I could clearly make out what looked like a reinforced metal wall with chains protruding from it. The focus shifts to the back of the room where a large door opens and something is dragged in a sheet, concealing its identity, and tied down with thick chains. The video ends.
Video 2: June 1975 I saw about 20 armed men entered the room and start to unwrap the sheet from what they hauled in. After several minutes of unwrapping, the identity of the thing they brought in is revealed.
There seemed to be a glitch in the recording, at different points in the video the screen was covered in static. The sound was muted, and the figure was hard to make out. It appeared that the creature was attempting to change shape, vibrating as if to phase into a different shape. Despite its best attempts, it remained unsuccessful and reverted back to its original form. .
Video 3: the very next day wnd June 1975
The video opens with the creature fully in focus. Within the 18 hours of footage, the creature is constantly seen attempting to change form. It fails every time, but that doesn’t prevent it from trying again. It looks like a blur, occasionally a second head or what appears to be a human hand. It’s apparent the creature has shapeshifting abilities.
The next 200 videos are identical. To the naked eye, it seemed like a loop. But it wasn’t. The creature was, however, relentless in its attempt to free itself or escape.
Video 204: October 1975
This time the alien appeared to be asleep, head limp and no movement. This video had sound, but it was accompanied by a high pitch buzz that made my ears hurt. At the six-hour mark, the faint cry of a baby can be heard before gradually escalating into full-blown screaming.
At first I suspected that one of the scientists had brought their child along, but the agents assured me the crying was coming from the creature. As the video progresses, the cries grow louder and more demanding, eventually accompanied by a deep voice. Close to the end of the video, 22 hours in, multiple voices begin to scream simultaneously, causing everything to shake.
The documents show that, after this incident, the cage was reinforced. The next few videos are static, proving that the creature has the uncanny ability to manipulate video and disrupt frequencies.
Video 340 February 1982
The creature, with its brown discoloration, possessed crocodile like scales and an eagle like head, but it was entirely reptilian in nature. It stood at a whopping 12 feet tall and was covered in an unknown slime like substance.
The chains were substantially thicker than they were years earlier, and the cage has been fortified. It looked like a different room altogether.
The agents explained that the creature got loose and attacked 12 soldiers, absorbing them into itself instead of merely killing or eating them.
The creature was taken to Nevada, close to the desert, where a strong armoured underground structure had been constructed, far from civilization. The facility has been equipped with high level security precautions which allowed sections of the building to be sealed off and rigged to explode, guaranteeing that, if necessary, the building would collapse in on itself, trapping the creature within its cage, underneath the rubble.
The creature mirrored the image I conjured up in my head when I pictured the devil; brown, scaly, a demonic voice. The eyes were its most terrifying feature, shaped like that of a reptilian, but blood red. I counted 4 horns on its head, and it bore a pair of nasty fangs. Its feet bore the resemblance of a dinosaur, but it lacked a tale. Once the creature was no longer phasing in and out, it settled on a more consistent appearance, one that was easier to recognize.
Video 341 February 1982
This video marked the first appearance of my grandfather. He entered, along with four other men in lab coats, carrying a large syringe, approximately the size of my arm. He stuck it into the beast’s heart, causing it to instantly fall into a deep sleep. He proceeded to connect various machines onto the slumbering creature, attaching electrodes to its head and chest which were linked to a sizeable computer or something that resembled a computer. The video cuts off after this, leaving us to guess what occurred next.
Video 343 February 1982 The lights in the room were far brighter than before, and it once again lacked the presence of sound. The reason for this remained unknown.
Within the room stood a table filled with an assortment of equipment that appeared to be severely damaged. The lights flickered at intervals, and the creature began to phase in and out once more. This made it difficult to distinguish its appearance amid the static moments and blurred movements. The scientists observed the creature a safe distance away.
The scientists were relying on a certain frequency they discovered to keep the creature at bay. It seemed to produce positive results for the next few videos.
The videos that followed held a similar pattern. The creature remained silent, wired to machines while people came in and out taking notes or the occasional blood or slime sample. The creature remained composed, not once attempting to shift or escape again.
According to the agents’ records, everything proceeded as planned. My grandfather welcomed his first son, my father in 1975, he subsequently resumed his project until his resignation in 2008 when he was 55. A year later, he had a fatal heart attack, my grandmother following soot. My father was 34.
My father and his younger brother began working for ESA in 2004, when they were 28 and 24. New technological advancements introduced better cameras and electronic equipment for testing purposes. Since the technology became so advanced, their visits to the cage became as infrequent as once a week, or even less often. With new needles, enhanced equipment and upgraded data collection, the project transferred to electronic records ushering changes in the filing system.
While we waited for my transportation, they shared more classified documents. According to the notes, the once wild and violent creature was now unrecognisably tame and responsive, even answering questions. It remained unclear whether they had intentionally provoked it or stumbled upon a means to subdue it.
The circumstances surrounding my birth were strange. My dad impregnated a college classmate, and they made the mutual decision to put me up for adoption since neither of them had the desire to raise a child. My mother was studying biology and my father, a young genius physicist that found it hard to understand basic human interaction as it was. According to my foster parents, I was born in 2000, but the data I was presented proved I was born two years prior. This revelation had a more profound effect on me than anything else I’d seen.
Regardless, I was immediately given up for adoption and my existence was all but forgotten about. My adoptive parents moved to Iowa, and that’s where I lived up until 2018 when I left for Harvard. I always wondered what my birth parents were like. My adoptive parents told me I was a genius and speculated that I inherited my brain from somewhere. It’s an uncanny feeling; the knowledge that every aspect of my life was monitored.
The videos documenting the creature continued for the next 6 years. It became routine, apart from the indistinct chatter from the observing scientists and other government employees. There were no other sounds, incidents or noteworthy occurrences.
The tests revealed that the creature’s biology was predominantly alien, with no genetic material in common with humans. The scientists highlighted the alarming fact that the creature’s DNA was ever changing, resulting in frequent sample collection and analysis.
They concluded that, the creature was still a baby at the time of capture, which made it easier to contain. They did, however, underestimate its shocking growth rate which resulted in the deaths of the 12 soldiers’ years prior. At the time, it was still in its adolescent phase. Further research uncovered that the creature had the unique ability to absorb the genetic material of the men it came into contact with. The more humans it absorbed, the more diverse its gene pool became. A portion of the genes obtained gradually became more similar to those observed in humans. It’s as if the creature dove into an immense pool of genes and, as it absorbed more humans, its genetic makeup gradually began to adopt more human like qualities. Although difficult to comprehend at first, the basic explanation is that with every absorption of genetic information, the creature’s genetic composition seemed to evolve, storing human qualities within its own gene and gradually becoming more human-like That is my understanding of it.
Which brings me to the final video they have. Prepare yourselves.
Video: mov5078436b The creature behaved normally before viewing was disrupted by static. Among the sudden legion of voices, it echoed my father’s name, simultaneously expanding in size which causes the surroundings to convulse. Alarms resounded, piercing the silence as the creature tugged at its chains, cracking the floor ceiling in its attempt to break free. An ear splitting roar escaped its mouth as hordes of armoured soldiers rushed the cage, massive tasers in hand. They zapped the creature at maximum voltage as it continued to roar, lights flickering excessively. The camera feed is interrupted again by bouts of static.
A second group arrived, armed heavily with guns, increasing the crowd to a total of 30. The gunfire was so severe that it affected the video’s audio. One of the chains bound to the roof of the cage had already broken loose by the time the third group of soldiers arrived. This group carried a machine emitting bursts of fire, which had no effect on the creature aside from antagonizing it. It releases a powerful blast from its hand, causing the room to tremble which shattered the bulletproof glass into millions of pieces and sent the men flying across the room. Both of the creature’s hands were now free, and it began to morph.
Finally, a third group arrived in heavily armoured suits, unlike anything I’ve ever seen before. They wielded lasers and what appeared to be a concentrated lightning gun. I was grateful they hadn’t made use of nuclear weapons which would have wiped everyone out. After every attempt, the creature remained standing. Now it was his turn.
The creature freed itself from the remaining shackles and unleashed a blast with both its hands. All that was left of the solders was a gruesome mess of blood where they stood. The air filled with a haunting scream that echoed throughout the halls. The creature released a menacing growl in the form of words that sent chills down my spine, “Dennis McCarthy”, my father’s name.
Right before the camera blacked out, I could have sworn he was in the brink of morphing into a human form, but the recording was cut short by the thunderous detonation of explosions that sent the building into destruction, burying the truth within its rubble.
The scientists, including my dad, were taken by the ESA (extra-terrestrial security agency) and hidden in a heavily guarded underground haven. They were issued new identities and relocated, which isn’t a new concept for the government.
As far as the drones’ visual feed could capture, the entire operation was terminated, leaving behind the collapsed and buried ruins of a facility that was once fully functional. It was under strict surveillance for any signs of life, but as the years rolled by, complacency set in, compromising their once strict security measures.
My father, uncle and the rest of the scientists assumed new lives and identities. As far as the rest of the world was concerned, they were dead.
In 2010, an unexpected interruption occurred. Reports indicated that the drones simultaneously malfunctioned, and the video feed erupted into static. A team arrived at the site to find it disrupted, all the drones lay in scattered heaps across the landscape.
Before anyone could investigate or react, all communication with the agents safeguarding the scientists was abruptly terminated. One be one, the connections were severed, leaving them permanently unreachable. When they reached my father’s safe house, they were greeted with his spine-chilling absence. He had vanished without so much as a trace that he had ever been there to begin with—no signs of struggle or any shred of evidence left behind. He was lost in an infinite void of mystery. The only indication that something was amiss was the eerie blue glow invading the monitors moments before blackout. The only accurate word for it would be ‘suction’, leading the team to believe that they had been absorbed. It remained a speculation, though plausible enough to send waves of panic up their spines.
As we speak governments around the world have been swept up into the desperate search to locate the alien as well as training an elite group of drone pilots and soldiers in an attempt to confront and defeat the elusive entity. Furthermore, every effort at locating surviving relatives of the missing scientists, including my father, had fallen short. They too had vanished into an infinite cloud of mystery, not one left unscathed to provide answers.
Considering the site’s altered state, the complete destruction of the drones and the fact that the creature they had held captive was constantly evolving, they were profoundly aware of the unravelling truth.
I am the sole living descendent of the scientists that worked for ESA. The creature has made it his mission to eliminate any and all traces of their existence. This is the sole reason I was upended from my life and relocated to a heavily guarded facility, and this is the reason I feel compelled to share their stories.
I couldn’t comprehend why the creature would hunt me since I didn’t share the sins of my father, but I felt paranoid and vigilant regardless. I couldn’t help but feel compelled to look into the disappearances myself, perhaps due to some lingering hopes that the information was wrong. My pursuit for answers turned up nothing, not even social media accounts. It was as if any trace of their existence was utterly obliterated, there was no digital footprint left.
The reason I am now convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that my life is in danger is because I have started catching glimpses of subtle movements in my peripheral, a shadowy figure lurking around the premises, disruptions in the signal of my appliances, even the phone I am using right now.
Call me foolish for even relying on the very technology that might lead to my demise, but I felt compelled to warn anyone else who might be a descendent of the team that worked for ESA: project corrosion.
If you’re aware then heed my words and flee. If you are unaware, observe the news for any sudden or unexplained disappearances, and I regret to inform you but, if you come across the creature then it’s too late.
Stay safe my friends
submitted by
Dr_Apperpixion to
u/Dr_Apperpixion [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 10:34 survivorL30 Can you convert a Co2 GBB pistol into an HPA pistol while still being able to use a drum mag?
I currently have the KWC M92 and I’m thinking of changing it to HPA with a drum mag but I have no idea what parts I need for this or how to do it.
Does HPA even work on co2 guns? And if so, would the 800psi required to fire the gun not completely destroy the drum mag meant for green gas?
Help is appreciated
submitted by
survivorL30 to
airsoft [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 10:33 Foreign-Fix-2526 He telling the truth or this 🧢 ??????
2023.06.05 10:30 Wolfgeorge Mafioso Hardballer with Laser and Safariland holster
| This is the only Hardballer that left in the collection. I built it when Mafioso released the kit and the optional parts for it and later got the laser sight as well. The holster is a 80s ipsc holster by Safariland that a friend from HK gave it to me. Honestly I wouldn't find a more appropriate holster for this gun! submitted by Wolfgeorge to airsoft [link] [comments] |
2023.06.05 10:28 FURRY_DROPPER [WTS][TX] Honey Badger build
https://imgur.com/a/1S35KaB Includes everything in pic.
Gun, Tracer unit/Mock suppressor, Mag, 3 - 11.1 stick batteries.
No timestamp due to flair
Price: $360 G&S/$350 F&F - shipped
Base gun is a Matirx Calico Jack
Build:
- 12:1 SHS gear set w/ ZCI motor
- MAXX/Lonex compression parts
- Perun V2 Hybrid w/ MAXX adj trigger
- Dytac hop up unit w/ ZCI barrel
Gun is currently shooting around 26 rps at 340 fps with .2g bbs.
Shooting videos/more pics can be provided.
submitted by
FURRY_DROPPER to
airsoftmarket [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 10:20 ogreatgames Guitar Hero 3 Legends Of Rock: Legendary Rock Concert - PS2 Game
2023.06.05 10:19 VincentNZ What does spread set out to do, how does it do it and why am I not hitting anything?
| So for everyone living under a rock, the patchnotes of Season 5 revealed that they are addressing spread by greatly increasing it over th course of Season 5 starting with the ARs on Wednesday. This is following some criticism that the TTD experience at range is very lackluster, basically "Being lasered by X at y meters", which is something we have heard before. The exact wording is the following: "You will notice that the maximum dispersion has been increased by an average of 15-20%, and the weapons will reach that maximum dispersion level, when they reach half of the magazine." This is a statement with many question marks, but in essence we can only interpret it as follows: Max spread has increased by 20% across the board and you will reach it after firing 15 bullets in full-auto. Let me first iterate what spread means: Spread is a value that determines the angle at which a bullet will leave the barrel. Hence it makes your gun inaccurate. It has been in the franchise since forever and serves the purpose of an additional balancing tool, especially in the light of engagement distances. When we look through the stats provided by sym.gg we see where this would bring us: AK goes from 1.15° MaxMoving spread to 1.38° M5 1.3° 1.56° AC-42 1.4° 1.68° SFAR 1.5° 1.8° AM40 1.53° 1.84° Now let us take a look at BF4 values: All ARs had a max spread of 1.71° and 1.41° with stubby. So, some might be inclined to look at this and see the glorious days of BF3+4 microbursting returning and rejoice, but I will point out that BF4 and especially BF3 faced a lot of criticism around their spread mechanic. I am a big fan of the BF3+4 mechanics in those games, because the other factors that also control engagement ranges and balance: Recoil, playercount and, most importantly map design. In BF4, the average kill distance was 17m and 75% of all kills happened below 34m ( http://cs.uef.fi/~anssk/projects/bf4_kill_distance/) Outlier maps like Hangar 21 show that, while spread plays a role in reducing kill distances, map design plays a much bigger part. If you create sightline, you create opportunity. You would be hard pressed though to find even a 50m sightline on many maps of BF4, but even more so on BF3 where near half of the maps followed the urban design premise. Now take a good look at 2042 maps and ask yourself, whether those maps are more like Hangar 21 or Pearl Market. Secondly we have playercount. In BF3 in particular and even BF4, many players, played on playercounts below 64p. The higher the playercount the bigger your need to dispatch multiple enemies at the same time and in quick succession. Map design plays a big role here as well. Again in 2042 you are far more likely to get into multiple 1vsX engagements in fast succession. Thirdly we can look at the other gun mechanics in those games. The F2000 fires at 850rpm and has a horizontal recoil of 0.65° and 0.32° vertical recoil per shot. The first shot will also have a Vrec of 0.76° due to the first shot multiplier. The M5, with a similar ROF and damage model has a Hrec 0f 0.1° (!) and a Vrec of 0.35°. It is the gun with the lowest recoil profile we have seen in the franchise. This is a common thing in 2042, we have greatly reduced recoil over previous titles. In BF4 your spread will accumulate alongside your recoil, which will lead you to bursting anyway. In 2042, and this is already the case, your crosshair will be on point and the bullet will land beside it by a certain margin. But I do hear you saying, that this is all just numbers up until now, what does it actually mean in practise? Well, I have some treats for you in store. First of all I fired up some trigonometry. I am not 100% sure about the hitbox sizes of 2042, but I do know the hight is 1.7m and the width at shoulder level is between 40-60cm depending on stance, movement etc.. For the AK-24 this means that at max spread your bullet leaving the barrel at 1.38° your gun will be true to aim to 16-25m. For visualization purposes: The short side of the buildings on Orbital is 25m. For the AM-40 it is between 12-18m, or basically the bunker on Orbital. Now of course, you will not start at that spread, the AM-40 is true to aim to about 80m with the first shot, but this will degrade to 60m in the second and 47 in the third shot and so forth. Someone on sym.gg made a great visualization of the future AK-24 spread in BF4: https://streamable.com/uvm3ml And you might be inclined to say that this looks workable, but the AK has the lowest spread of the 2042 ARs, it will be worse than that, and again I will point out that we are not playing on Azadi Palace with 32p, we are playing Orbital with 128p. Take into account how often you will meet multiple people at 20-50m or even longer. Imagine seeing a guy that you can not engage, because you have the wrong weapon. Take into account scaling a ledge to have the whole opposite mountainside illuminated by scope glint. Take into account that ARs will be the only weapon affected for likely at least a month. Also keep in mind that the game does not tell you anything about the mechanics or the changes and that we all have to rely on 3rd party sites to get any form of data. Players will get up on Wednesday, boot up the game, whip out their trusted M5 and suddenly wonder why their crosshair is on point, yet the bullet leaves the barrel at 1.56°. We have had a full-auto meta for five years now, this game is 18 months old and they are throwing the gunplay overboard drastically. You might be inclined to agree that this is not the smartest move. I will also point out the state that DICE is in, and that they have tried the same thing before and failed miserably twice. In BFV this resulted in the Christmas TTK and, not even a year later TTK 0.25 "The Big Soak". These attempts were equally blatant as the "on average 15-20% dispersion increase". DICE, since then, has not improved in any department and the successor to the badly received BFV is the even worse received 2042, that changes their gunplay at the end of the game's lifecycle with a very limited to non-existing testing regime. If you are a rational being, you are not going to give them the benefit of the doubt. This is long-range now. Viusalization of 25m long-range engagements. submitted by VincentNZ to battlefield2042 [link] [comments] |
2023.06.05 10:09 PuzzleheadedAd4670 Unlimited RP
Welcome to Unlimited RP, a realm where your roleplay experience is boundless and the adventure never ends. Here's what awaits you in our qbcore FiveM server:
-Engaging civilian jobs with more on the horizon. -In-depth trucking logistics for those who crave the open road. -Four mechanic shops to choose from: Hayes, Benny's, Billy's, and Harmony. -Traditional jobs like towing and taxi services. -Restaurants seeking proprietors: PizzaThis, BurgerShot, and UwU Cafe. -A gripping criminal underworld with drug trades (meth, weed, coke, heroin). -High-stakes heists including armored truck, Fleeca, Paleto bank, and Pacific bank & vault. -Progressive crafting system, featuring diverse and gun crafting. -Exciting events like the Bobcat Security heist and house robberies. -Advanced systems for drug selling, car boosting, and racing. -Quality-of-life scripts for NPC taxi pickup, medic, and mechanic services. -A sprawling car dealership with new imports added frequently. -Opportunities for ambitious business ownership. -A player auction house for trading goods. -Advanced banking system and home ownership options.
At Unlimited RP, we are more than just a roleplay server; we are a gateway to an alternate universe. Are you ready to step into an extraordinary adventure that's just a click away? Join us, redefine your roleplay experience, and create your unique destiny.
Hop in now and start your journey! Join our Discord server at
https://discord.gg/dYdgvRU5Ux and become a part of our growing community.
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PuzzleheadedAd4670 to
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2023.06.05 10:01 throwaway_Nettles Two friends of mine are going through a breakup, both are saying that the other was abusive and one of them has said that I'm likely to be the next person the other one manipulates. I am extremely confused, don't know who to trust and deeply concerned for both of them.
TW: manipulation, all the different types of abuse, suicidality (the human being is safe don't worry), mention of someone's part suicide attempt/overdose, sexual coersion/possibly assault
Throwaway account, hoping this gets somewhat buried by the algorithm so the people I'm asking about or those who know who they are don't find it, will probably delete this later. I'm 16ftm, the friends are both 18-19 and in the first year of uni. Because of a situation surrounding outing me as trans in front of transphobes I kinda completely lost most of my friends that I had before apart from them as they have been supportive, additionally like 6 people who are on the autism spectrum have asked/assumed that I'm on it as well which explains how I'm awful at reading people. I also have no sense of self and memory issues because of family stuff I'd rather not get into. I'm gonna call them Wendy and Cassie for the sake of anonymity and try to keep personal details hidden. 2 years or so back Wendy had major issues and was apparently very aggressive (I didn't know her then) but she has grown massively from then by now and is now a whole lot more functional and good as a human being.
~ 5-6 days back the two of the broke up, Cassie ended up having a bad suicidal breakdown which I tried to help her through (She's safe now) which accidentally brought back old buried feelings to do with my brother's attempted overdose from when I was 13-14 but I thought the feelings were fine at that point. During this time Cassie said that Wendy and her had not had a good relationship always and that 2 days after the breakup Wendy had sent her messages that made Cassie physically worried for her safety and were like how Wendy used to behave 2 years back, at this point Wendy was kinda radio silent which understandable completely so I was focusing on making sure Cassie was as ok as she could be. Fast forward a day or 2 and I get several long paragraphs from Wendy explaining with limited detail that apparently Cassie had been sexually coercive/possibly assaulted her and had been emotionally abusive throughout their relationship, almost simultaneously I was messaged by Cassie that Wendy was accusing her of sexual assault for no reason. I mentioned to Wendy that I was extremely confused but offered all of my support to her, she asked me how the situation looked from the outside and after I explained that I am a very bad human being to judge that right now, accidentally mentioning that part of it was due to the feelings regarding my own brother's suicide attempt around the same age as Cassie's, her contemplating using a similar method to the one he used and her having a younger brother in my year in school making me get too invested and extremely stressed about Cassie's safety. Wendy realised I was not going the most ok which I had tried my best to hide from her because she's currently going through a whole lot worse with the realizations, processing and unravellings surrounding that relationship and also I was trying my best to hide those emotions because emotions are kinda a problematic thing to have in my family and probably picked up on some other stuff I mentioned because she ended up sending me several paragraphs explaining how Cassie was a very skilled manipulator, I am most likely not in the headspace to be acting like her therapist, that because of similarities between how Wendy and I act and operate sometimes she is extremely concerned about Cassie possibly gunning after me as her next target because of the reasons listed in the first paragraph. I ended up responding to her and saying that i'd probably just try to calm down and sit with the pets and that I would be available if she wanted to talk about anything/wanted support in a few days and have spent Sunday (yesterday) trying to calm down from the emotions to do with my brother.
I am extremely confused as to what the actual fuck is happening, there are conflicting stories coming from both directions, both are saying the other has been abusive and I am extremely concerned for both of their safeties and functioning but am finding it kinda hard to trust either of them right now because of the aforementioned conflicting stories. I don't want to accidentally side with whoever the possible abuser is in the situation but because of the inability to read human interactions/subtext and my own past emotions I haven't processed barging through my door I feel like a blindfolded man walking into a mine-filled marsh. I'm sorry for posting this, I know I'm not the person most affected here and I should just be able to support them and be a good human being but I'm just absolutely lost and have basically nobody to talk to about it. Cassie messaged me again this morning asking if everything's ok since I haven't responded and I'm very confused as to how to react as I didn't respond to the message where she said she was getting accused of SA out of nowhere (I just saw the passing notifications and it doesn't show when somebody read the message), any idea? I'm so bloody lost, I know I'm thick as a brick, I just need guidance.
submitted by
throwaway_Nettles to
Advice [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 09:22 CLOAK_Online Can I get the gauss mini gun still?
So I chose the settlers to breach the vault with me. However for the heavy gunner build that I want I need the Gauss Mini gun which you get from the raiders. Can I still buy the plans and the weapon parts from the raiders or do I need to restart?
submitted by
CLOAK_Online to
fo76 [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 09:10 ogreatgames Family Guy Video Game: Fun-Filled Adventure - PS2 Game
 & more while supplies last! -- ")
#playstation2 #action #adventure --
Family Guy Video Game for Sony PlayStation 2. Your favorite characters from the TV show are here in this video game full of laughs. It even has comical cutaways and flashbacks like the TV show at select parts. Play as Stewie, Brian, and Peter in a wacky, zany fun-filled adventure. Jump, parachute, explore and more to help achieve objectives. Aim to collect weapon power-ups to upgrade your ray gun as Stewie. Play in a funny stealth adventure as Brian. And smash and fight many enemies as Peter. Each character has different levels featuring different gameplay modes such as shooting, battling, or stealth. Aside from its hilarious immersive gameplay, the game’s cartoonish graphics makes it more entertaining to play. --
Hey check out similar videos here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=05uKspxQ89s&list=PLVduyMnVQjzNYPljUBqwgAXdMPQ9CEKWY submitted by
ogreatgames to
Ogreatgames [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 08:39 SamPaxton97 Call of Duty: Eternal
Hello
Here's a thought experiment. Imagine that, in 2017, Activision did not publish
Call of Duty: WWII but instead
Call of Duty: Eternal. This is a story which is very much the same as what
Call of Duty: WWII transpired as but with a couple of significant differences. For a start, it's not set during World War Two - it's set in a fantasy world with a 1940s/50s level of technology. A global war is raging between mankind and Orks, with the Orks having conquered great tracts of the world, and the story opening with the efforts by humanity to retake "Albion" from Ork occupation. I like to imagine the faces of
Call of Duty fans when the first trailer came out and, seeing what looked like D-Day, got excited that at last the franchise was going back to its roots - only to see that the enemies are Orks and the main character is a Lenape woman.
To help with this imagining - below you'll find the full script for the first mission of
Call of Duty: Eternal, based on the first mission of
Call of Duty: WWII. The rest will gradually follow.
You might find it useful to follow along using this video - a walkthrough (no commentary, thank God) of the actual first mission in
Call of Duty: WWII to help with visualising it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7y1bDQBEhA Call of Duty: Eternal Mission 1 X-Day Text slowly appears on-screen: The world is bathed in flames. The Ork clans, united for the first time in centuries, are on the march. Man faces extermination. A human skull is shown before an Ork boot comes down on it, shattering it. Radio broadcast: With unmatched ferocity, the Ork war machine has launched its onslaught against the world… mankind faces the abyss.
The camera pans up on the Ork boot to show an Ork soldier as, behind him, Ork soldiers and tanks move through a devastated city. Radio broadcast: As we brace for our darkest hour, we must summon our strength to be the bulwark against oppression.
Ork bombers are shown bombing London, recognisable for the Thames if not for the architecture. They are four-engine bombers, like B-17s, and the camera closes in on a propeller which shifts to a ceiling fan. Radio broadcast: The Ork onslaught will be the greatest test we'll ever face.
The camera pans down from the ceiling fan Mona Kanti, a young Lenape woman and the protagonist, is shown joining the Imperial Armed Forces. She stands in a line in a recruitment office as a recruitment officer stamps her papers. Radio broadcast: But face it and defeat it… we must.
To punctuate the “we must,” a sudden cut to black with the sound cut out. Then, we hear the voice of the Ork Primarch. A speech plays, meant to mirror FDR’s D-Day Prayer, with shots of the Ork war machine we’ve been hearing so much about. Primarch: With this war we set upon a mighty endeavour.
Fade from black to show huge lines of Ork soldiers in formation, like big Nazi rallies, are shown. Primarch: A struggle to restore our civilization…
Ork soldiers on one knee in this rally are shown, closer up, dressed in battle gear and their faces daubed in war paint. Primarch: …and to set free a suffering people.
A view from the rear of the rally, with the vast architecture of the Primarch’s palace shown looming over it all, resembling the Palace of the Soviets. Primarch: Our Sons. Pride of our Clans.
Another panning shot of the assembled Orks, this time from the side. Primarch: May the Mother lead them straight and true.
An Ork mystic, on the balcony overlooking the assembly, blesses the troops with hands raised to the sky. Primarch: The road will be glorious. Men's souls will be broken with the beauty of war.
A shot from behind the mystic, seeing the assembled troops stretching towards the horizon. Primarch: In this time of fire and blood…
The face of one Ork soldier is shown up close. Primarch: …we shall prevail.
With the slightest of grimaces, the Ork uses a knife – and, in the background, we see the others doing the same – to ritualistically slice his forehead and let blood trickle down. The cutscene then shifts to the Imperial Navy ships, including battleships of a scale similar to the Super Yamato, that are heading for the beaches of Albion. Mona Kanti is writing a letter to her sister, Luna Kanti, and we hear her voice-over as we view shots of the fleet. Kanti (narrating): Luna. Oh, I wish you could see this, sister. An armada from one horizon to the next. I turned sixteen too late to help free Ériu. But not Albion – and it’s gonna be tougher. Much tougher. You know, I think I could bear the blood, and the misery… and the Orks. But the waiting… well, that’s a whole other battle.
Inside the troopship living quarters. We are now in first-person as Kanti. Kanti is sat at a table, hanging out and talking with her squad-mates Kinsi Rei (female Somali; shaved head), Thea Adlai, (female Swedish; ginger, freckles, glasses) and Ren Tao (male Chinese). Ren Tao is eighteen – the others are all sixteen. Bunks are stretched out behind them and other soldiers, of all ethnicities and sexes, walk by throughout. Rei is holding court while playing with a knife, every now and then jabbing between her fingers. Rei: So she asks me for my watch and I'm thinking, "what in the Nether do you want my watch for; your parents make like fifty times mine!" But I turn around, and I felt this punch. And it's cold like ice.
Some of the dialogue is drowned out by Kanti’s narration. Every now and then, Kanti glances down at her fingers as she snaps them, but whatever she’s trying to do with that isn’t happening. Kanti (narrating): Believe it or not, I managed to make some half-decent friends in Basic. All scared as can be. But nobody’s letting on.
Rei keeps playing her knife game as she talks. Kanti (narrating): I hated Rei when I met her – and now she's my best friend. Funny how that works. She's always looking for trouble. If there wasn't already a war on she'd be off trying to start one.
Rei offers her knife to Thea Adlai and, though we can’t hear her given the narration, seems to be asking her if she wants to try the knife game. Adlai refuses.
Adlai: Besides, I gotta keep all my fingers if I'm gonna take photo of the year.
Kanti (narrating): Adlai says she's gonna be a photographer for a fashion magazine. She’s got a good eye. Except when she takes off her glasses – then she can’t see shit.
Rei offers her knife to Kanti and Kanti turns to Ren Tao. Kanti (narrating): Tao's the vet but, if I’m honest, he's what kokomi would call “a bit of a bumpkin.”
Ren Tao is tempted to play Rei’s knife game. Tao: Okay, okay. Let's make this interesting.
Rei: It’s not interesting? Kanti – what’re you doing?
She says this in reference to Kanti’s finger-snapping. Kanti (narrating): I swear I used to be able to do this…
Tao: So you keep saying.
Tao take off his talisman and dangles it in front of Rei. Tao: Xu Yaling. Spirit of war.
Adlai: And sex, right?
Tao: Sssh. (
Rei and Adlai laugh) He's had my back since Sabha. And, yeah, that’s
real gold. (
drops the talisman down on the table) Rei, three times in ten seconds, and he's all yours. (
Sits back down) Rei: I don't know.
Tao: Oh, you could always wimp out. That’s a choice, too.
Kanti: My money's on Rei.
Rei: Okay. Okay, I'm in.
Adlai: I can't watch.
Tao: I can.
Rei looks to Adlai. Rei: Just time me when I tell you. Back to my story – me and my girls, we muscled our way into this chess game that the wrestling team had going. We had a bona-fide genius among us – but it was me playing. We worked out a system where she can signal to me what moves to make. You should have seen the Head Girl’s face when I took that pot. (
To Adlai) You ready? That's what happens when you try to hustle a hustler. Now…
Rei plays the knife game while Adlai times her and wins the bet in a few impressive seconds. Rei: Checkmate!
Tao: There ain’t no way!
Kanti (narrating): Tao had enough fight in him for two men.
Rei: Much obliged.
Rei offers to shake hands with Tao. Tao: My mother told me never touch a Nube.
Rei doesn’t flinch but you can tell she’s ready to throw hands. Instead… Rei: That's not what she said last night.
Rei winks and Tao shakes her hand. Kanti (narrating): And enough bigotry for six.
Tao: Meh, who needs a stupid talisman anyway.
Rei: Apparently, you did. Here, have it back.
Tao: You won it.
Rei: It’s fake gold.
Tao: What? No, no, no, that’s as real as you or I.
Rei: A hustler always knows.
Tao: Ah, whatever, if it’s fake I don’t want it. I'm gonna get something better. A real trophy. You'll see.
Rei: Good luck with that.
Kanti snaps her fingers and finally produces what she wanted – a finger of flame, like a lighter, appears. Kanti: I did it! Look, look, I did it!
Rei: Well, by Baphometh, isn’t that something?
Tao: That’s very pretty, Kanti. You’re ready to take on the Primarch, I should think.
Rei: She was always ready. Right Kanti?
Tao: You got any healing spells we could use or is it all evil magic with you?
Kanti: Well-
Rei: Oh, go on, tell him, Kanti! Tell him about that thing you can do!
Adlai: What thing?
Rei: And there’s no such thing as good and evil magic. Just good and evil people.
Kanti: It’s not that I can do it; it’s just that it happens sometimes. When someone’s dead I can kinda, you know, see into their past. But they have to of died recently. And I can’t do it with most people.
Tao: Well, we’re invading Fortress Albion, my friend. Good time to find yourself some corpses.
Rei: Maybe even your own.
Adlai: Hey, Kanti, do that spell again for the camera.
Adlai raises her camera then, seeing her watch, realizes that they are late for the mission briefing. Adlai: Oh! Never mind, briefing’s at 18:00; we're gonna be late!
Adlai jumps up and runs from the room. The others also stand. Tao: Run, little mouse.
Rei: I got us covered Kanti; don't worry about it (
Showing the pendant to Kanti and winking). It
is real gold.
As Kanti and Rei leave the living quarters, they encounter Khand, their turban-wearing sergeant, and in terms of personality very much a cranky sergeant stereotype. Khand: Briefing's about to start; what in the Nether are you idiots doing?
Kanti (narrating): Then there's Sergeant Khand. He’s a sweetheart.
Khand: Oh, you think you're special, huh? The Orks are gonna eat you alive.
Rei: No, not me, sergeant. I’m high in salt.
Khand: Watch your lip, Rei. On me.
Khand leaves. The other two move to follow. Rei: Since I'm obviously on a lucky streak, whatever happens, stay close. First Albion, then the Great Pale, then home in time for tea and medals. We got this, Kanti.
Scene fades out. All of the 66th Infantry Division troops are on the deck of the ship as the rain pours down and Colonel Kitwana, a Swahili man, gives his pre-battle speech. As he does, we see the soldiers assembled watching him. Kitwana: Today… we embark on an operation of unparalleled importance. To establish a beachhead in Albion… and roll back the Ork horde... that has terrorized the world since before many of you were born. We are all that separates the world from darkness. This is so much more than a chance to be heroes in our own lifetimes. If we prevail… our triumphs will be etched into the hearts and minds of a grateful world for untold generations. I'm talking about glory. True glory.
Kanti narrates her letter to Luna and soldiers begin to climb down the cargo net on the side of the ship into landing craft. These craft start making for the Albion coast. Kanti (narrating): Colonel Kitwana can give a nice speech. His pep talk reminded me of the one Coach Pakwa gave us on our Mother’s Night game against Susquehanna. I'm sure you remember we lost by 67 points. (
Focuses on Sokolov and Khand) Always looking over Khand’s shoulders is Lieutenant Sokolov. He's got him on a tight leash. But if Khand breaks free, we'll all get bit. Ever since I found my gift, I wanted to be like you, Luna. You've always been a tough act to follow. But I'll do my best.
Gameplay We are now in first-person again as Kanti. Kanti (narrating): It's now or never.
Kanti is writing in her notebook, the photo of Luna pinned to a page, as their landing craft drives for the Albion shore. Kanti is interrupted by Rei. Rei: Hey! I wish I was coming home to her!
Kanti: That’s my sister! Just wait ‘til we hit Lutetia. Enough girls for the rest of your long life.
Rei: I’m starting to realise how far away it is.
Kanti take a quick glance at her notebook and closes it before tucking it into her pack. Sokolov: Remember. No digging in at the shore. You advance. You need to stay low and do not bunch up. Stick to your training and you're gonna make it through.
Khand: Most of you, anyway.
Medium bombers pass by overhead, resembling the Junkers Ju 88 (in this universe known as Dragons) on a heading towards Albion. Tao: Alright! Give em hell, boys.
Text appears across the screen. X-DAY Lùnastal 17th, 397 NE Rheged, Northern Albion Rei: The beaches are meant to be flattened, right?
Khand: You sound scared, Private.
Rei: No, sir.
Khand: You should be.
Driver: Hey, you! You!
Kanti turns to look at the landing craft’s driver behind her. Driver: Got a light?
Kanti: Sure thing.
Kanti snaps her fingers a couple times and produces the flame again. Driver: Oh – you’re one of
them.
Soldier: Never trust a witch.
As the driver lights his cigarette on her finger, a bullet hits the boat’s machine gunner in the throat; he falls, flailing, with blood spurting out of his neck like in a Tarantino film. Shells start to fall. Driver: Bastards!
Sokolov: Everyone down!
Rei: This is it!
Ork artillery lands in the grey ocean all around, spraying the craft with water. Kanti crouches with the rest of the troops. Soldier: Watch out!
Bullets bounce off the landing craft’s armour. Soldier: This isn’t fun!
Driver: Five hundred yards!
Another shell lands nearby and sprays the craft with water. Kanti trips but is held up by Khand grabbing her arm. Driver: We’re gonna have to pull off!
Sokolov: No, we stay on mission! You're taking us in!
Driver: We must have drifted! I can't see the landmark!
Khand: You heard the lieutenant. Full speed!
Sokolov: Incoming!
An artillery shells blows up the neighbouring landing craft. Soldier: By the Gods!
Sokolov: Hold tight!
An artillery shell, again, lands near the boat. Kanti: Damn it!
Driver: Two hundred yards!
Looking up, a Dragon bomber is visible coming down with an engine on fire. Driver: Twenty seconds!
Sokolov: Remember the plan! Get to the seawall!
Khand: Ceres! Aradove! Get the bangalore to the wire, fast! Everyone ready? Here we go!
Sokolov: Drop the ramp!
Driver: There's no cover!
Khand: That was an order, damn you! Drop it!
The ramp drops just as a landing craft consumed with flames comes crashing into theirs. Rei: Oh, shit!
Kanti is knocked off her feet by the impact. Looking up, she watches as machine gun fire from the clifftops chops down a number of soldiers on the boat now that the ramp has been dropped. One has his head blown off and his neck is left spouting blood over Kanti as others are also cut down. Sokolov: Over the sides! Now! Now!
Kanti follows as the survivors climb over the boat’s side. She stays underwater for a few seconds before being helped to her feet by Sokolov, spluttering. Sokolov: I got you, child!
Just behind him, the beach is consumed by fighting and the noise of war is deafening. Sokolov: Get your head down and keep moving!
Sokolov leads Kanti out of the surf, a burning soldier falls screaming from another landing craft and into the water, while carnage reigns all around. Bodies are floating all about and the water is red with blood. Sokolov: Kanti; on me!
Running through the sand as explosions go off all around, artillery can be seen curling from the Ork lines towards the beach. Sokolov and Kanti hit the deck in front of some Ork tank traps. Sokolov: Demolition team is dead! Take the bangalore and get to the seawall! We need to clear a path to the bunkers!
Kanti temporarily looks away, back to the water, and witnesses the bloodshed of soldiers dying, and a number running out of a landing craft on fire, while a warship close to shore opens fire on the coastal defences. Sokolov gets Kanti’s attention. Sokolov: Kanti!
An explosion goes off nearby, half-soaking Sokolov’s face with gore. Someone just blew up. Sokolov: This is your job! You got that?! Now pick up the banger!
Kanti moves the severed arm of a dead soldier to retrieve the bangalore. She looks upon the dead soldier’s corpse and, suddenly, her vision fades away and she sees his memories. This is the first of the Internal Vortex collectibles which can be found throughout the game, whereby additional lore is provided through Kanti’s ability to tap into the memories of certain corpses (human and Ork). In this case, the accessed memory tells a brief story of the soldier (Private Omid Afshani) and how he was part of a traditional military family and all his brothers have already fallen, told he would be a general someday, how he was born on a ship evacuating Persia (which goes some way to explaining why the Imperial military is so multiethnic – the whole world evacuated to the Americas) and how his last letter home from the ship told of how “I can’t wait to hear the birdsong again.” Afterwards, she returns to lucidity. Sokolov: Kanti! Kanti! You with me?!
Kanti: Yes!
Sokolov: You can do this!
Sokolov stands and starts running up the beach. Kanti watches after him. Kanti: I hope so, sir!
Kanti looks at the dead soldier that was carrying the torpedo bangalore, and with one hand closes his eyes. Kanti: Sorry.
Kanti takes the body’s R7 Remi rifle (comparable to the M1 Garand) and proceeds up the beachhead, trying not to get killed. The machine gun nests in the clifftop fortifications will open fire on the soldiers then wait for a few seconds to reload. This will be the player's chance to move up to avoid taking damage. The player moves from cover to cover – tank traps, the wreckage of vehicles such as half-tracks and light tanks, and shell craters, mostly. Khand: Hurry before they reload! Move it!
Sokolov: Kanti! This way! Hurry! Stop and you’re dread!
Tao: Shit!
Sokolov: Those MGs are killing us! Get off the beach!
Khand: Private Kanti – get to the seawall!
Rei: Get to the seawall! I’ll meet you there!
A couple of armoured vehicles – light tanks resembling Soviet BT-7s, here called LT-5 Termites – are now also moving up the beach and providing fire support. One blows up. Sokolov: Keep low. When there’s a break in the fire, run for it!
There’s a break in the fire – you run for it. Sokolov: Kanti, get the bangalore!
When Kanti reaches the seawall, which is made up of a big mound of sand lined at its top by barbed fire and burning gasoline, she falls against it. Her fellow soldiers fall in alongside her or are already there. A lot of wounded are also there, being treated by medics as machine gun fire flies over their heads. Rei falls next to Kanti, her face covered in dirt and blood. Rei: Kanti! Use the banger; I'll cover you! After we breach, keep pushing toward the bunker!
Kanti: You’re covered in blood.
Rei: It’s not mine. Focus!
Kanti sets up the torpedo bangalore, made up of two cylindrical rods, with the second able to fit inside the first. Her handling is shaky and she drops one rod. Rei picks it up for her and gives it back. Rei: We're nearly there!
Kanti pushes the torpedo bangalore into the seawall. Rei: Pull it! Pull it!
Kanti: Fire in the hole!
Kanti scrambles backwards and the bangalore explodes, tearing a hole in the seawall for the soldiers to pour through, dirt pouring down like rain. Sokolov: Weapons ready! Fix bayonets!
Kanti fumbles for her bayonet and fixes it to her rifle. You can now use this as a melee weapon against enemy infantry. Rei: Ready to see your first Ork?
Sokolov: Attack!
Sokolov leads the troops through the hole – and many, though not Sokolov, are cut down. Rei: Let's go! Let's go! Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
Sokolov: Push forward!
After passing through the hole, you are faced with a clearing sprinkled with tank traps and barbed wire. After that, trenches, and then the bluffs with fortifications spitting machine gun fire. Rei: Into the trench! Hurry!
Soldier: Orks!
You now face your first Ork drones as you push towards the trenches. Once you get into the trench, you slowly clear it and a mortar position, presumably losing Health as you do. Once done, you turn a corner deeper into the trenches where Rei is located. Rei: That wound looks bad! Here, take this!
Rei throws a health pack to Kanti. The player can now call on Rei, when the squad meter fills, to add a pack for a total of four. Kanti: Many thanks!
The player moves through the trenches, clearing out Ork drones. Friendly troops leap across the trenches. The player then gets to the end of the trenches and reaches the bluffs covered by Ork fortifications. A slope goes uphill between the bluffs but machine gun fire pins the friendly troops down and makes it impassable. Khand: We can't advance with those MGs firing on our position!
Sokolov: Hold tight. Fire support incoming!
Khand: Kanti, mark the target!
Khand throws a canister to Kanti. Kanti catches it and throws it uphill towards the Ork bunkers. Red smoke emanates. Sokolov is shouting into a radio. Sokolov: Kestrel, target is lit up! Hit it now and hit it hard!
Radio: Roger, we have your smoke visual. Attack run inbound.
Explosions hit the MG bunker as rockets from a trio of dive-bombing jets which resemble de Havilland Vampires (in this universe called Banshees) come in and obliterate the fortifications. The jets pass by close overhead. Tao: That's it! Let 'em have it!
Adlai: MGs are dead!
Kanti: (
laughs) They tore them to shreds!
Sokolov: Get to the top!
You and your squad move up the hill – a wounded Ork, both arms missing, stumbles from the smoke and still tries to fight by biting at Sokolov. Sokolov shoots it down. Sokolov: Crazy bastards.
More Ork infantry advance. Ork: I shall wear your hide as a coat!
After defeating these Orks, the player advances to the top of the hill through which additional trenches burrow. Sokolov: Kanti; I need you and Rei to take point and clear those bunkers! Go!
Rei: Had to be us!
You move in with your squad. There are five bunkers to clear. The first has a clearing full of mortar positions, where Ork infantry defend, and there’s more firing at you from inside the bunker itself. Sokolov: Orks are dug in. Kanti, get a grenade in that bunker!
You break into the bunker and clear it out, including the machine gun post covering the beach. Rei: First one’s down!
Sokolov: Bunker’s clear – everyone out.
You move on. Taking the adjoining trenches, you come across an Ork Officer – larger and more heavily armoured than the Drones you’ve been fighting so far – holding a human soldier by the neck. Assuming you shoot him in the head, the only non-armoured part, he’ll go down and the soldier is saved. Soldier: Thanks! I owe you!
If not, and your bullets bounce off the Officer’s armour, he crushes the man’s neck in his hand and comes for you. After that, you drive on through the trenches, killing a few more Orks, before turning and entering an underground bunker. Inside, the entry is covered by a machine gun post. Khand: MG's pinning us! Someone toss a smoke!
You can do that, or you can perhaps kill the machine gunner. Up to you. Afterwards, you drive on through the underground bunker. It’s a bit of a catacomb full of dormitories and a radio room. Eventually, you clear it. Khand: Bunker's clear. Let's go!
Sokolov: Everybody out, bunker's clear!
You head back outside, 2 of 5 bunkers complete. You continue through the trenches, meeting fresh Orks. Rei: There’s artillery hitting the beach! The next assault wave won’t make it!
Khand: Keep pushing! That artillery is hammering our ships!
Kanti: On it, sir! Yeah, I can do this, I can do this…
You carry on through the trench. Some Banshee jet fighters screech overhead. Reaching the entrance to the next bunker, you see a friendly – Corporal Lieu – with an F3 Inferno – a backpack flamethrower. He fires it down the bunker at unseen enemy troops before being gunned down. Kanti: I'm going in!
Rei: Careful!
You enter the bunker – you can pick up the F3 Inferno as you do, which doesn’t last long but which is fun to use. Ork: Come, little men!
You clear the bunker. As you reach the machine gun post, you enter into a quicktime moment. Kanti gets ambushed around a corner by an Ork soldier, who grabs her by the throat and pins her to the wall, but she jams her combat knife into his neck. Falling from his grasp, she sees the machine gunner just as a shell from a ship offshore hits the bunker dead-on and blows it, and him, to smithereens. Rei appears from the dust and helps Kanti to her feet. Rei: Shit! Fucking Navy. Don’t they believe in us?
Returning from the machine gun nest, some Orks have shown up to try and retake the bunker. Take them out and then the bunker’s cleared. The next bunker is just a hop from this one – you enter, at first finding nobody, before discovering an Ork pinning an Imperial soldier to the wall. Soldier: Somebody help!
You, I should hope, kill the Ork. Soldier: Thanks! Oh, hey, a girl…
Kanti: You wish.
You drive into the bunker, in the heart of which is a mortar position, and take out the Ork defenders. With that, the bunker is cleared. Khand: Move up, move up!
Everyone rallies at the big steel door at the end of the bunker. Khand: Adlai. Tao. With me. Kanti, you and Rei clear the next bunker. Rally at the top of the bluff, and for fuck’s sake try not to get yourselves killed.
You interact with the big steel door and open it, before going with Rei down some more trenches. Kanti: Alright, Rei. One more!
Rei: We got this!
You turn a corner into a clearing before the bunker. There’s Orks both defending it on the ground and a sniper on top of the bunker itself. After dealing with this, you head inside, Rei behind you. As you enter the bunker, Kanti is ambushed by an Ork Major – she is thrown to the floor and the Ork stands over her, pulling out a knife. Ork: Never did fear smell so sweet.
Rei jumps onto its back and holds onto him around the neck. The Ork manages to throw Rei onto the ground before stabbing her through the belly. Kanti: Rei! Oh, shit,
no!
The Ork soldier leaves the wounded Rei, knife still sticking from her stomach, and approaches Kanti. Ork: Stand and face me, woman. Show some honour.
Kanti stands and fights the Ork, which through its superior strength easily ends up on top of her, taking away her knife and now pushing it down towards her with both hands. Then, Kanti’s hands light up and the flames return – her whole hands are on fire. The Ork roars in pain and surprise and backs away, looking at its burned hands, before Kanti runs at him as the flames go out and tackles him to the ground. The Ork is still stronger and goes back to throttling her – but they’ve fallen near Rei, who yanks the knife out of her belly and jams it into the Ork’s chest. Ork: The glory…
The Ork dies. Kanti climbs off and approaches Rei, who suddenly brandishes a pistol. Kanti: Whoa, Rei…
Rei: Duck!
Kanti does so and Rei shoots the unseen Ork which was behind her. Kanti looks back to Rei, who is dealing with quite a lot of pain. Kanti: Come on, you’re okay, you’re okay.
Rei: I can't walk.
Kanti pulls up Rei’s uniform to see her stomach – the wound is gushing blood. Kanti: Oh, shit…
Rei: That bad?
Kanti: It’s not
great.
Rei: Would you mind getting me out of here?
An explosion, presumably artillery – Kanti looks down the bunker to see it shudder, rubble falling from the ceiling. Kanti: Yeah, course, no problem Kinsi, just stay with me, okay? Can you do that?
Rei: I’m gonna have to try. Pulling that knife out was pretty fucking stupid, huh?
Kanti: No comment. Come on.
The player starts dragging Rei out of the bunker and outside. Across a pretty dangerous clearing are friendly lines. Kanti: We've gotta get back to friendly lines!
Kanti starts dragging Rei across the grass Rei: On your left!
Kanti shoots the Orks which appear from the left with her pistol and keeps going. Rei: You’re gonna… have to tell me… how you did that fire thing.
Kanti: I will when I figure it out myself!
They keep going. Kanti: Not much further. Just keep pressure on that wound.
Rei: I’m trying!
Kanti drags Rei to a wall of sandbags and clambers over them. Kanti: We gotta take cover!
Rei, in what is pretty clearly a painful endeavour, follows suit and lays in the mud. With her pistol, Kanti faces the Orks now coming for them. Ork: Tasty, salty man-flesh!
Rei: How many?
Kanti: Too many!
Once the Orks are dispatched, Kanti looks back down at Rei. Kanti: We're clear! Come on!
Kanti starts dragging Rei through the mud. Rei: You call that fuckin' clear?
They skirt the edge of the trenches – an Imperial soldier with a flamethrower is dousing a group of Orks in fire. They continue along the edge of the trench, which is lined with barbed wire and so inaccessible, at least for Rei. Rei: I'm losing too much blood. I think. You need more than half, right?
Kanti: Just hang in there! I gotta find a clearing to get in the trench!
Kanti places Rei down as smoke canisters pop, obscuring the next Ork wave to come their way. Ork (from somewhere in the smoke): The clan will feast on you!
Kanti: Keep your head down!
Rei: Did you get 'em?
Kanti: They keep coming! How many of these fuckers are there?!
After taking out four or five, Kanti turns back to Rei. Rei: Watch out!
Rei, with her sidearm, shoots down an Ork drone running at them from behind. Rei: Still got it.
Kanti: Now’s our chance!
Kanti keep dragging Rei along the edge of the trench, smoke from the Ork canisters obscuring everything. As she goes, an Ork grenade lands at her feet. Kanti: Fuck!
Kanti throws grabs it and throws it away. She sees an open area in the trench. Kanti: Bingo!
Kanti jumps down into the trench, up to her ankles in mud, then turns back to Rei. Kanti: I got you!
Rei rolls off the edge of the trench and lands in the mud at Kanti’s feet. A few more Orks appear from the smoke and Kanti shoots them down. She then looks down at Rei, who’s on the edge of losing consciousness, and then looks down the trench where more Ork infantry are coming at them. Kanti: Oh, give us a break!
Kanti takes them out. Then, she turns back to Rei and starts dragging her down the trench. Rei: Oh, wow, I'm actually bleeding out.
Kanti: Just keep pressure on it!
Rei: I’m trying! I’m trying!
Kanti: Almost there!
They reach some concrete steps – a friendly soldier is at the top. Soldier: Come on up here! Move, move!
Kanti starts dragging Rei up the stairs – the soldier runs down and helps. Soldier: I got you!
Two Orks come around the corner – someone on the top of the stairs shoots them both down. They reach the top of the stairs and find themselves in the middle of a friendly improvised triage centre. Kanti lays Rei down, whose face is very dazed, as she flicks off her helmet, blood trickling from her mouth. Kanti: Okay. Stay with me. Healer!
Nobody comes – everyone’s busy. Rei: I need morphine. All the morphine.
Kanti takes out a syringe of morphine, pulls off the cap with her teeth, and injects Rei in the thigh. Rei’s breathing is strained and painful. Kanti puts a hand under her head as a pillow. Kanti: You gotta hang on. Those girls in Lutetia are waiting for you.
Rei: Really?
Kanti: Of course.
Rei: I… uh… how about another look at your sister?
Rei manages a smile, sniggering through the pain, and Kanti laughs, too. Kanti: You’re infuriating.
Rei: It's okay. I can't see shit. I'm just gonna rest right here.
Rei’s eyes close. Kanti: No, no, no, you need to stay awake. Hey.
Kanti puts her hand against Rei’s face, slapping her awake, and Rei’s eyes open. Rei: Mona…
Kanti: I'm here.
Rei makes eye contact. Rei: Help me.
Kanti: I need a fucking Healer!
A Healer finishes treating a wounded soldier and rushes over, taking over from Kanti in trying to stop the bleeding. Healer: I got this! Go!
Kanti looks back down at Rei. Kanti: But… but I…
Sokolov appears, standing over them. Sokolov: Kanti! He'll take care of her. I need you with me. (
to others) Listen up! There's an Ork cannon just a little up the road. It's tearing up the beach – we’re gonna stop it. Let's roll!
Kanti looks back down at Rei, who’s reaching out to her. Kanti takes her hand for a moment. Kanti: Just stay alive, okay?
For a moment, with Rei on the very edge of death, little flickers of her memories flash before Kanti’s eyes. We see her mother telling her she’s a disappointment, Rei sitting in a prison cell, and then being told by a recruiting officer that “the Army’s running out of men – we need some ladies ready to be heroes.” Then Kanti returns to lucidity and Rei’s face. Rei: I promise.
Their hands part and Kanti stands, grabbing a rifle, and joins the rest of the squad. Sokolov: Check your ammo and grenades!
Khand: You heard him! Up the road, now!
Kanti and the rest of the squad move out of the top of the bunker, along a field pock-marked with craters, then go onto a dirt road leading towards a farm. Kanti: Moving up!
Khand: Let's move!
Sokolov: Be ready – these Orks don’t look like the surrendering type!
You keep moving up the road, finding some dead cows as you go. Khand: Move fast! They're shelling the beach to shit!
You reach the target – a machine-gun nest is set up in a half-destroyed farmhouse and starts shooting at you as you appear. Sokolov: MG in the hay loft! Take cover and take it out!
After taking out the machine gun, you keep moving up to fight Orks among the farmhouses and hay bales. A large artillery cannon is in the centre and you move to clear it and secure the area, moving in a couple of the farmhouses to do so. Adlai: Where’s all the civilians?
Khand: In the Ork’s stomachs, probably!
Once you’ve cleared everything, silence seems to fall. Soldier: Orks coming in from the south! A lot of them!
Sokolov: They’re gonna try to retake the cannon! We gotta hold this position!
Khand: Not a step backwards!
The squad defends the position as a couple waves of Orks swarm towards them. You can use the machine gun posts in the upper floors of the farmhouses to help fight them off. Adlai: There’s too many of them!
Khand: Hold! Have courage!
Still the Orks swarm the field to the south – until explosions start to blow them away. Termite tanks appear from the left, their 45mm guns tearing through the Orks, which are either slaughtered or flee. Tao: Our boys are coming in!
Adlai: Look at them scatter!
Sokolov: Alright, everyone. We mopped them up good. I don’t think they’ll be back.
Khand: Clear! Destroy that cannon!
Kanti goes to the cannon and crouches down behind it. An Imperial soldier appears next to her. Soldier: Thermite!
The soldier carries a number of thermite charges inside his helmet like a bucket and empties them out in front of Kanti. Kanti lights one of them. Kanti: Fire in the hole!
Everyone backs away – you probably should too – and the thermite explodes. The cannon is destroyed. Sokolov: Excellent work, Kanti. Alright, everyone, rally on me to the assembly point. Khand, I'll need a casualty report. We lost so many.
Khand: But we took the beach.
Sokolov: What a price.
At the rally point, Rei is on a stretcher on the ground, a cigarette in her mouth as Tao is knelt next to her. Rei: Kanti...
Rei tries to sit up and Tao puts out a hand to encourage her to lay back down. Given the pain on Rei’s face, that’s probably a good idea. Tao: Man, I thought I'd seen everything…
Kanti: She gonna be okay?
Tao: Yeah. They taped her up pretty good.
Rei: I should’ve stayed on the boat.
Tao: Oh, now she tells us.
Kanti: Hey, what you did back there… I owe you. Big time.
Rei: I’d say we're even.
Kanti: We'll see this through.
Rei smiles. Rei: To the end. I guess.
Kanti: Whenever that may be.
Sokolov and Khand walk by behind Rei; Sokolov addresses everyone. Kanti glances up at them, then back at Rei, who just gives her a knowing nod, then stands as she looks back at their superiors. Sokolov: Beachhead's secured. We'll bivouac at the second hedgerow after the ridge. It’s not over, everyone.
Behind them, a couple of dead Orks are being examined. Adlai is taking photos of one while a soldier gently kicks the head of another. Soldier: Stop kicking it.
Soldier #2: I don’t wanna.
Khand regards Kanti. There’s blood in his beard. Khand: Welcome to the Smiling Sixty Sixth. You're a long way from home, farm girl.
Khand walks off. Sokolov watches Kanti, then approaches when Khand is out of earshot. Sokolov: That’s his way of saying he’s grateful. You did well. Not bad for your first day.
Kanti: Thanks, sir. I, uh…
Sokolov puts a hand on Kanti’s shoulder. Sokolov: You'll be alright, child.
Kanti: Yes, sir.
Sokolov pats her shoulder, nods, then walks off. Kanti looks down at her hands, covered in dirt and blood, which hold each other before slowly separating. Kanti: Course I will.
The level ends. submitted by
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2023.06.05 08:29 IneverGiveUp01 A Fresh Perspective: Could Rational Recovery be Your Turning Point?
Hello everyone,
Imagine being trapped in a destructive cycle for eight long years, knowing you need to escape but feeling utterly powerless to do so. That was my reality. I'm a 26-year-old man who, from the tender age of 12, found himself caught in the relentless grip of pornography and masturbation addiction.
By 18, I was painfully aware of the damage it was causing and desperate to break free. I tried everything – NoFap, meditation, sports, cold showers, even punishing myself, but to no avail. It felt like my addiction was an unshakeable opponent. But then, something changed. I discovered a strategy that changed my life. If you're struggling, I want to share this with you...
Caught in the grip of this addiction, I would spend an average of seven hours per day, even peaking at thirteen hours sometimes. The toll of this habit was heavy, affecting my personal, professional, and social life severely. Yet everything changed when I discovered Jack Trimpey's Rational Recovery method.
While his book provided me with crucial insights, it was his comprehensive AVRT Demonstration, where Trimpey guided an alcohol addict towards permanent abstinence, that truly filled the missing pieces in my fight against addiction. The Rational Recovery method fundamentally shifted my perspective towards addiction, helping me to recognize and silence the voice of my brain (the Beast) pushing me to consume. Today, I want to share my experience, hoping it could be an effective solution for many of you. You can access the entire demonstration at the end in the 'Useful Resources' section.
Understanding Addiction and Navigating this Guide
Let's talk about what addiction really is. Addiction isn't about the behavior itself, but rather the desire to escape pain and seek a better life. It is marked by ambivalence, a feeling of being torn between two minds. Overcoming addiction involves breaking free from the grip of pleasure and reclaiming control over oneself.
Before I delve into how I applied the Rational Recovery method and the results I got, I want to pose a simple but powerful question: If I placed a big red button in front of you that, when pressed, would instantly eradicate your addiction, would you press it?
If your answer is 'yes', then you have all the reasons you need to quit. I've been where you are now, writing pages upon pages of reasons to stop, yet relapsing despite knowing how harmful it was. It's important to recognize when a pattern becomes harmful, it's time to stop.
As you explore this guide, remember the importance of keeping an open mind. Let's borrow some wisdom from Mark Twain, who once said, “It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you into trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.” It's a nod to the importance of being receptive to new ideas and methods. This guide may offer a different approach, but embracing it might bring about the change you're seeking.
What is AVRT?
AVRT (Addictive Voice Recognition Technique) is a transformative strategy that I've found invaluable in my journey to overcoming addiction. This technique helps you recognize and differentiate yourself from the 'addictive voice', the part of your primitive brain structure that fuels your addiction.
Think of AVRT as your personal defense mechanism that works under any circumstance, regardless of your emotional state – be it sadness, anger,boredom, loneliness, or stress. The aim here isn't to suppress these emotions, but rather to stay in control of your actions, no matter what you're feeling.
The 'addictive voice' – which we'll call the 'beast' – is a sneaky internal saboteur. It's the part of you that wants to continue with the harmful habit, despite you consciously knowing it's not beneficial. AVRT is about learning to separate this beast from your own true will, thus empowering you to reclaim your life.
The power of AVRT lies in this distinction between you and the beast. Once you master this technique, you'll learn to reject the rationalizations and temptations that originate from the beast. The dissociation from the beast is what makes it possible to make a firm, irrevocable commitment to quit your addiction. By not identifying with the beast, you can prevent yourself from suffering commonly associated with resisting addiction.
In essence, AVRT isn't about fighting or resisting; it's about recognizing, dissociating, and reclaiming control of your life.
What is the "beast"?
The "beast" is a term coined by the Rational Recovery method to denote the part of your brain pushing you towards your addiction. We call it the Beast because, like a wild, uncontrollable animal, it cares about nothing but fulfilling its need. It is a cunning inner voice, whispering that you need to engage in porn and masturbation to feel satisfied, relieved, or happy. This voice, often referred to as the Addictive Voice (AV), can be quite deceptive. It might paint you a picture of an enticing scene, produce alluring sounds, offer a moment of relief, or even present a false promise of control—"
Just be more careful next time."
This beast manipulates you with excuses, deceptive emotions, and outright lies to make you succumb to your addiction. But let's make one thing clear: the beast is not your friend. It's your worst enemy. It's a parasitic entity that has latched onto your life, thriving on your addictive behavior. Like every living thing, it fears its end, and that end comes when you stop feeding the addiction. It has no regard for your well-being, your relationships, your life goals, or your health. Only its survival matters.
As you read through this guide, it's crucial to remain aware of the Beast's interference. Remember, the Beast manifests as a voice in your head or as an emotion, pushing you towards addictive thoughts and actions. You might experience feelings of resistance, discomfort, anger, fear, anxiety, or even a cringe reaction. These are the Beast's attempts to disrupt your progress.
While the Beast can attempt to manipulate your thoughts and emotions, it does not and cannot control your actions. It's your survival instincts that the Beast taps into, but your ability to make decisions, to govern your actions, thoughts, and emotions is uniquely yours.
The Beast may present itself in thoughts like, "
This is too difficult to understand," "
This won't work for me," or "
I'm an exception to this method." Understand that these thoughts are not your own, but the Beast's desperate attempts to maintain control.
In its relentless quest for satisfaction, the beast views everything, including you, as expendable. It's the embodiment of your addiction, caring for nothing but its next fix. It's deaf to reason, blind to consequences, and immune to remorse.
If this description resonates with you, don't panic. You're not 'sick.' It's merely an error of association made by your body - an error in the script, so to speak. It mistakenly believes that this addictive behavior is as vital for your survival as breathing or eating.
Take these moments of resistance as signs that you are on the right track. You're threatening the Beast's existence, and it's trying to fight back. Recognize these voices for what they are, continue moving forward, and know that each step brings you closer to reaffirming your control and freedom from addiction.
[How to Proceed]
Recognition Technique
Let me share an effective exercise, adapted from the Rational Recovery book, that could help you end your porn and masturbation addiction right now.
Start by observing your thoughts and feelings about watching porn or masturbating, both positive and negative. The thoughts and feelings that encourage continued use represent your Addictive Voice (AV), while those advocating for abstinence represent the real you.
When you learn to identify and understand your AV, it becomes an easily defeated foe causing you to indulge. All it craves is pleasure. The main tactic of the Beast is to seize control of the pronoun 'I'. It will try to convince you by saying things like "
I want to watch porn" or "
I need pornography ".
However, you can effectively counter this strategy. By simply adding a 't' and shifting the 'I' to 'It', you can remind yourself that these thoughts are not truly yours, but are the Beast's manipulations. So the sentences become, "It wants to watch porn" or "It needs pornography ".
By changing "I" to "It", you dissociate from the discomfort or distress. Yes, it's that simple, placing it squarely on the Beast instead of yourself. It's crucial to recognize that these feelings are the Beast's attempts to coerce you back into addiction.
Now, tell yourself, "I will never consume porn or masturbate again", and listen for any negative reactions – this is your AV responding. Conversely, if you think, "I will consume porn or masturbate whenever I please," any pleasant feelings that arise are also your AV asserting control.
This recognition technique dispels short-term desire, making abstinence effortless. Complete separation of 'you' from 'it' results in complete recovery and hope for a better life.
Picture the AVRT technique as a form of gardening. The Addictive Voice is the weed trying to overtake your garden and sapping nutrients from the other plants. Recognizing the weed for what it is and uprooting it preserves your garden's health. Similarly, identifying and acting against your Addictive Voice safeguards a healthy and fulfilling life free from addiction.
Shifting Technique
Shifting is another powerful technique to help you dissociate from the beast of addiction. The idea is to alternate between viewing your addiction from the perspective of the beast and your own.
When viewing addiction through the Beast's eyes, you visualize what it craves the most about the addictive behavior and imagine the associated pleasure for a few minutes. It will express sentiments like "
I want this now!" or "
Please give it to me!", and you may start to feel the beast getting excited, happy, or impatient.
Then, shift to your perspective and reflect on the pain and negative impact the addiction has on you and those around you. Allow yourself feelings of disgust. Let your own feelings now take over, and you will find that your Beast withdraws and you feel either neutral or put off. This back-and-forth process allows you to dissociate from the Beast.
Think of Shifting as toggling between two TV channels: one projects a seductive yet distorted image of addiction, while the other reveals the harsh reality of its damage.
Introducing the "Big Plan"
The idea of the Big Plan in Rational Recovery is to make a personal commitment to lifelong abstinence from addiction. This commitment, for me, took the form of the decisive statement, "I will never consume porn or masturbate again". It involves pinpointing a day and an hour for your turning point. For me, that was a Sunday at 12am. This moment represents a clear and definitive end to your addictive behavior and the start of a new chapter in your life. You can decide to commit either immediately after going through this post or by specifying your day and hour. It's entirely your choice, and we'll discuss this in more depth later.
Your Power Over the Beast
The Beast, despite its intimidating name, is in fact harmless. It may try to coerce, manipulate, and instill fear, but it is important to remember that it is powerless without your consent. It cannot force you to return to the addictive behavior; only you can make that decision. In fact, you are the main authority, the one in charge, and it's the Beast that fears you.
The Beast is aware of your power and control, and it's terrified of it. It knows that you can shatter its illusions in a snap, without any difficulty. You're the one who makes the call, not the Beast, and it fears your unyielding decision to quit the addiction forever.
Its tactics may often involve fear. It's like the Beast is pointing a gun at you, but the truth is, its gun is empty. It's just a bluff, an illusion. You know it, and the Beast knows it too. It's simply trying to maintain its influence by resorting to fear tactics, but you can see through its lies.
"Don't trust yourself in tempting situations...you're not strong enough yet." – The Beast's voice:
The Beast tries to maintain control by suggesting certain places, events, or people will trigger a relapse. You might hear it whisper, "
You can't go to that event, you might relapse," or "
Avoid that location, it's too risky." This is simply the Beast's tactic to keep a hold on you, aiming to make you believe you're not completely in control.
By simply recognizing it for what it is - a tactic of the Beast to undermine your confidence - you can dismiss these fear tactics and reaffirm your control.
What if I Lose Control?
The Beast within you is a cunning entity, ever ready to exploit your moments of doubt and vulnerability. It whispers falsehoods, instilling fear and shaking your confidence. But don't be swayed, for you have always held the reins. The Beast may inhabit a corner of your mind, but it lacks the power to control your actions.
Not convinced? Try this: Extend your finger in front of your eyes and move it, then ask the Beast to do the same. The Beast can't because it doesn't hold sway over your physical actions.
The truth is, you've never truly "failed" in your endeavor against addiction. You've always had the choice, and sometimes you've elected to surrender to the Beast's desires. But that doesn't equate to losing control. It merely shows you gave in, momentarily, to the Beast's whisperings.
Expectations
Recovery from addiction isn't about becoming a superhero or uncovering the universe's hidden secrets. It's about realizing that we don't have control over every aspect of life. However, we do have control over our actions, our reactions, and how we choose to face life's unpredictable events.
Do you choose the path of self-discovery and freedom from addiction? Or do you prefer to remain confined by the restrictions that addiction imposes? Be cautious: the Beast may distort your perspective, asking, "
Where are the benefits?" or suggesting, "
You haven't gained anything," and even instigating impatience by incessantly asking, "
How long until I see the benefits?"
But don't fall prey to these distortions. Escaping addiction isn't about immediate gain or fixing all your life's problems. Recovery isn't a magic solution; it's a step towards personal empowerment. It's about gaining freedom and unlocking your potential, not just as a person in recovery, but as an individual capable of resilience and authenticity.
Concentrate on the liberation that breaking free from addiction brings. Let's choose this path towards a life where addiction no longer controls us, allowing us to genuinely live and experience life to its fullest.
Understanding the Real Reason You're Engaging in This
Engaging in this addiction is solely for pleasure and nothing more. Every other justification is a fabrication of the Beast. It's designed to make you believe that giving in to your addiction is the only route to happiness or relief when you're feeling depressed, bored, lonely, stressed, or miserable.
Speaking from personal experience, I used to think that I turned to pornography and masturbation because I was lonely, stressed, or had a rough day. I thought that because I spent my entire day working alone on a computer, my environment or lifestyle was to blame for my addiction. These were excuses, a way to avoid taking responsibility for my actions, guided by the Beast's narrative.
The key to recognizing the Beast is noticing that the conversation always bends towards indulgence in your addiction.
Imagine you're having a tough day, and you begin to feel down. Instead of recognizing this as a passing mood, the Beast seizes this opportunity. It will amplify your negative emotions by saying things like, "
You're always unhappy, aren't you? You know what would make you feel better... just one quick session won't hurt." Or, "
You're so lonely, this is unbearable. Just indulge, it's your only comfort." These harsh whispers are the Beast's attempts to deepen your feeling of depression and nudge you towards the addictive behavior. Depression doesn't create addiction; addiction does.
The Beast's goal? To make you feel so low that resorting to your addiction seems like the only way out. Conversely, when you're content and joyful, the Beast will persuade you to give in, arguing it will amplify your satisfaction. Just think about it. If you're living what you perceive as a perfect life, the Beast will still argue you could feel even better with pornography and masturbation. It's a never-ending, destructive cycle.
Understanding and Separating Desire
Desire, in its essence, is not a negative emotion; it's a natural human condition. It propels us toward achievement, drives creativity, and gives meaning to our experiences. It also plays a crucial role in our relationships and our sexuality. The key in overcoming addiction is not to extinguish desire altogether, but to discern between healthy desires and those manipulated by the Beast.
Imagine your desires as a beautiful, roaring river. It's full of life, movement, and potential. This river represents your natural, healthy desires - things like connecting with others, pursuing your hobbies, personal growth, and even your sexual desires. These are your desires, part of who you are.
Then, there's the Beast's desire - a poisonous stream trying to merge into your river, attempting to hijack your natural flow. This stream carries the pull of addiction, steering you away from your authentic path, manipulating your thoughts, and distorting your perceptions.
Recognize this poisonous stream and refuse to let it merge with your river. This is not about damming the entire river or stifling your desires, but about rejecting the poisonous stream that the Beast introduces. It's about retaining your authentic desires and letting them guide you.
Identify that any thought associated with the desire to indulge in the addiction is coming from the Beast. By doing so, you begin to differentiate between what you truly want and what the Beast wants. This understanding will empower you, helping you keep your river clean, vibrant, and true to its course.
In the whirlwind of addiction, it can be easy to confuse the Beast's desires with our own. I, too, was lost in this confusion. I believed I was drawn to endless layers of perversion, thinking that I was attracted to the limitless exploration of perversion. But deep down, this wasn't me, it was the Beast's influence, its relentless push for more and more. Upon reflection, I realized my true desire was much simpler and profoundly more meaningful: to love and be loved. To have a wife, to raise children together, to share in the mundane and the magical moments of life. That's my authentic desire, not the empty promises of temporary pleasure the Beast kept pushing. This profound clarity is a stark contrast to the Beast's corruption, a beacon that can guide you back to your true self.
The goal is not to eliminate desire, but to reclaim it, to keep it authentic and personal. Desire is a part of your humanity; it's the Beast's manipulation of it that leads to addiction.
The Myth of Relapse and the Power of Perfection.
The Beast might sometimes whisper, "
It's okay to relapse. You'll do better next time." This is a shrewd strategy designed to maintain its hold on you by normalizing relapse as a part of the recovery journey. It uses these tactics to sow seeds of doubt in your mind, aiming to eventually lead you to relapse. Rational Recovery, however, views this differently: the key is making a definitive decision—your Big Plan—to abstain from the addictive behavior and sticking to it under any circumstances.
Human beings are perfectly capable of achieving perfection in certain aspects of life. Consider the professional athlete who plays a perfect game or the musician who delivers a flawless performance. They do so by making a firm commitment to their goal and adhering to it diligently, without allowing any room for mistakes.
Similarly, your recovery journey can be perfect too. Once you make your Big Plan to abstain from addictive behavior, you can stick to it perfectly, without any relapses. This is the ideal that Rational Recovery promotes—not "try, fail, and try again," but "decide and stick to your decision perfectly."
Your Beast wants you to believe that perfection is unachievable, as this gives it room to persuade you to relapse. But don't let it fool you. You have the power to make a perfect decision and stick to it.
What if it's too Difficult or Painful?
Instead of pondering over this, consider a different question: 'For whom is it too painful or difficult?' Any discomfort or difficulty associated with ceasing the addiction stems from the Beast, not you. Observing the Beast's distress is a positive sign - it shows you're successfully dissociating from it.
Remember that humans can only fully experience one feeling at a time. When you start feeling discomfort from abstaining, it's crucial to recognize that this isn't your discomfort. It's the Beast that suffering. The Beast is protesting because it's not getting what it wants. This suffering isn't negative for you; in fact, it's a positive sign. It means you're successfully asserting control over your decisions, as the Beast's discomfort indicates that it's losing its influence over you.
Most importantly, remember: you are safe. You risk nothing by quitting this addiction. Every feeling of discomfort or fear is from the Beast, not you. Your well-being and safety are never in jeopardy by choosing to stop. By rejecting the Beast's influence and asserting your control, you reclaim your freedom from addiction.
How would I know what I will do in the future?
While predicting your future actions may be impossible, you can certainly define what you would never do. Consider the activities that you find disturbing, unhealthy, and reprehensible - those that you would never engage in.
Now, add porn and masturbation addiction to that list. As you do this, pay attention to your Beast. It might try to concoct far-fetched scenarios that seem to justify succumbing to the addiction. Recognize these for what they are: desperate attempts by the Beast to manipulate your thoughts. By doing so, you can effectively disregard its interference and remain true to your values.
I'm scared to relapse, what should I do?
Relapse anxiety is a common pitfall many encounter on their NoFap journey. You may be confidently progressing, then suddenly a thought creeps in: "
What if I relapse tomorrow?" This thought triggers anxiety, shaking your belief in your commitment.
From the Rational Recovery standpoint, relapse anxiety is the Beast's deceptive voice trying to manipulate you. It incites fear and uncertainty, making you feel as if relapse is imminent. The Beast attempts to shake your confidence and sense of control. But here's the truth: relapse anxiety is an illusion, a tactic used by the Beast to tighten its grip.
Combat this by distancing yourself from the Beast and recognizing that relapse anxiety is a deceptive tactic used by the Beast to instill fear and weaken your resolve. Remember, you risk nothing by quitting this addiction; you are safe. Any discomfort you experience stems from the Beast, not you.
Reiterate your Big Plan: "I will never consume porn or masturbate again." By affirming your decision and distancing yourself from the Beast's influence, you can dispel the anxiety and stay firmly on your path. Remember, you are in control, and you will always stay in control, the fears conjured by the Beast hold no sway over you.
The Beast's Attack on the Dreamscape
The Beast's intrusion into your dreams should not be a source of fear. This isn't a situation that requires extensive concern, this is just a sign of the Beast's distress.
There are generally two types of dreams where the Beast tries to assert its influence. The first type are explicit sex dreams, designed to reignite the desires and cravings associated with your addiction. The second type are dreams where you see yourself relapsing, which can be distressing and seem all too real.
When your neocortex (the real you) goes to sleep, the Beast sees an opportunity to attack and tries to regain influence over you through these dreams. This is evidence that you are on the right track. Your progress towards your goal of freedom from addiction is causing this panicked response from the Beast.
Remember, no matter what happens in your dreams, you are in control in reality. These dreams are just dreams, and they do not have the power to make you do anything.
Understanding 'Blue Balls' and Nocturnal Emissions in Recovery
Experiencing discomfort or an aching in the testicles, often referred to as 'blue balls,' is something that some individuals might encounter during their decision to quit their porn and masturbation addiction. Similarly, you may also experience nocturnal emissions or 'wet dreams' during your journey to recovery.
These phenomena aren't signs of harm, danger, or relapse, but rather physical manifestations of your body adjusting to your firm decision to quit the addiction.
While your body is adapting to a new, healthier state, not reliant on constant sexual stimulation, the Beast might attempt to distort these occurrences into negative experiences. It might tell you that nocturnal emissions are relapses, causing unwarranted fear and anxiety. But remember, you're in control.
Consider these sensations and events as physical signs of your transformation, a testament to the changes happening within you. It's important to remember that not everyone experiences this, and even if you do, it's not something to be overly concerned about. These adjustments are something you are more than capable of handling. As your body adjusts to your new lifestyle, such events will likely decrease and eventually stop. Don't let the Beast use these natural bodily responses as a scare tactic.
Gradual Reduction: A Beast's Strategy
In your journey of breaking free from addiction, you might be tempted to adopt a "gradual reduction" approach - cutting back little by little rather than quitting outright. This strategy, while seemingly logical, is often a ploy from the Beast, setting you up for failure.
During my own journey, for many months, I was enticed by the concept of gradually reducing my addictive behaviors. The approach felt less abrupt, seemingly offering a smoother transition. Even the Beast within me suggested compromises such as, "
Let's start by indulging only in the afternoon," or "
How about we limit it to weekends?".However, I discovered through experience that this gradual reduction strategy often creates more problems than it resolves. Let me tell you why.
Firstly, by not making a clean break, you're continually feeding the addiction, keeping the Beast alive and active. It's akin to trying to put out a fire while still pouring small amounts of gasoline on it - it keeps the flames going, never fully extinguishing the fire.
Secondly, when you set specific times or days for indulging, you're not freeing your mind from the addiction; instead, you're refocusing it. You find yourself constantly counting down the hours or days until your next 'allowed' session. This fixation lead to a persistent preoccupation with the addiction, turning the process into something torturous and counterproductive.
Lastly, even on the days where you've decided not to indulge, the Beast is still at work. It doesn't take breaks. It try to convince you to deviate from your plan, asserting things like, "You're going to do it in a couple of days anyway, so why not just do it today? Why wait?" This becomes a recurring battle with the Beast, undermining your resolve.
The gradual reduction method keeps the addiction in focus, maintains the Beast's influence, and undermines your resolve. It's far more effective to make a clean break and assert your decision to quit outright. Remember, you're not losing anything by quitting - you're freeing yourself from the Beast's control.
Counting Days
Why should you spend energy on counting days for an activity you've resolved never to engage in? The Beast excels at setting goals and then weaponizing them against us.
Here's how the Beast use day counting against you:
Making a big deal of milestones: The Beast lead you to focus excessively on reaching a certain number of days, weeks, or months. While milestones can be motivational, the Beast use them to create unnecessary stress and pressure, saying things like "
What if you don't make it?" or "
Imagine how bad it would feel to start over."
Justifying a lapse: "
You've made it 100 days, you deserve a reward!" or "
One slip after so many days won't hurt." The Beast use the number of days as an excuse to suggest that it would be "safe" or "earned" to indulge in the addictive behavior.
Creating a false sense of security: The Beast suggest that after a certain number of days without indulging in the addiction, you're "cured" and could safely return to the behavior without becoming addicted again.
Undermining early progress: In the initial stages, the Beast belittle the small number of days you've been free from the addiction, making statements like "
You've only managed two days, you'll never make it a week."
Leveraging bad days: If you're having a tough day, the Beast say, "
You're miserable even after 30 days clean. See, quitting doesn't make things better. Might as well go back."
Remember, these are all tricks of the Beast trying to manipulate you into returning to the addictive behavior. The Beast will use anything, including the count of days, to try to get what it wants. The best way to deal with this is to remain steadfast in your decision and continue dissociating from the Beast.
So, instead of getting trapped in the Beast's game of counting days, surrender this act to it. We can concentrate on the broader scope - liberating ourselves from the Beast's clutches, embracing enduring change, and regaining our freedom. Day counting becomes insignificant because it no longer illustrates our path. Our chosen journey is one where the Beast's urges hold no power, and our authentic liberation takes the limelight. Let the Beast obsess over counting days, while we commit to a life of emancipation and self-discovery.
Why Punishment Doesn't Work
Self-punishment is a common response to addiction, yet it often proves ineffective. This can take many forms, from physical discomfort to emotional torment. In my own battle against addiction, I tried various self-punishment strategies. On the physical side, I would resort to self-harm. Emotionally, I burdened myself with negative self-talk, depression, feelings of hopelessness, anger, sadness, and even thoughts of death. It's important to note, however, that these intense feelings of guilt and self-condemnation were amplified by the Beast. The Beast utilizes such negative emotions to paint addiction as the only respite, the only 'good thing' left in life. It is a manipulative trick to keep you chained to the addiction.
Yet, over time, these painful memories have faded, while the seductive pull of the addictive behavior has remained vivid in my mind. It's a compelling illustration of the human condition: we often forget pain and remember pleasure.
Consider individuals who struggle with drug addiction. They might end up in a hospital after an overdose, experiencing immense physical pain. But as time passes, the memory of this pain dissipates, while the allure of the drug, the pleasure it brought, remains clear and tempting. This imbalance often leads them back into the cycle of addiction.
This became evident to me during the last week leading up to my final decision to quit - my Big Plan. It was the most challenging week of my life; I was counting the days until my liberation. Now that I'm free, when I think back to that week, the Beast tries to rewrite the narrative, calling it the "
best week of all time!"
This disparity between the memory of pain and pleasure underscores why self-punishment is an ineffective strategy for long-term addiction recovery. Rational Recovery offers a different approach. Rather than relying on the fleeting memory of pain, it focuses on recognizing and dissociating from the addictive voice—the Beast.
Arguing with the beast
Let's clarify something: arguing with the Beast is futile. The Beast is single-minded, craving only the satisfaction of its addiction. Moreover, it's cunning, capable of playing both sides of an argument.
For instance, the Beast might implant thoughts such as, "
You could indulge now, it's not a big deal." Then, to create confusion and feign agreement, it might echo that very idea, saying, "
Yes, I could indulge now." It's essential to recognize that both these sentiments are from the Beast. It is a clear demonstration of how it can promote the idea of indulgence while also pretending to be 'you' to create an illusion of consent.
In the Rational Recovery technique, every thought or feeling associated with the indulgence in the addiction is identified as coming from the Beast, including its attempts to take possession of the pronoun "I".
You are the decision-maker here, you are in control. Your will is what truly matters, and the Beast must inevitably conform to your decisions.
Dealing with White-Knuckling and Intense Urges
Feeling urges, cravings, or hunger sensations is a natural part of the recovery journey. In fact, it's a positive sign, an indication that you are making progress. However, these feelings can turn into white-knuckling when you identify with the Beast's thoughts and feelings. When you start saying things like "
I'm so horny" or "
I need a relief ASAP," you're identifying with the beast voice. When you find yourself arguing with the Beast or doubting your decision to quit, you're in the grip of white-knuckling.
In my own journey to recovery, I experienced these urges, cravings, and sensations. But rather than identifying with them and turning them into a struggle, I recognized them as signs of the Beast's distress, not mine. It was the Beast who was desperate and frustrated, not me. This recognition made these moments not just bearable but even satisfying, as they signaled that I was on the right track in my recovery.
The power of these urges and cravings diminished with my Big Plan, my absolute decision to never indulge in the addictive behavior again. Even if you find yourself in a white-knuckling situation, remember that you can shift your perspective. Recognize that every thought encouraging the addictive behavior is coming from the Beast, and use the Recognition or Shifting techniques to help you dissociate from these thoughts and feelings. After that, reaffirm your Big Plan, stating firmly and clearly, "I will never consume porn or masturbate again." This firm commitment to your Big Plan will dispel all doubt, releasing you from the grip of white-knuckling.
The Big Plan: Your Commitment to Freedom
Taking a firm decision is a critical step in overcoming addiction, and this is what making a Big Plan entails. This plan is a complete commitment, devoid of room for negotiation or compromise. When you formulate a Big Plan, you're making a promise to yourself to never indulge in your addiction again, under any circumstances.
Choosing a specific day for your Big Plan can help add a sense of occasion and finality to your decision. For instance, I personally chose a Sunday at 12am. Your Beast will likely agree to this arrangement, looking forward to a "last hurrah."
But as you approach your chosen day to initiate your Big Plan, the Beast may start getting anxious. It may whisper, "
I can't let this go!" or "
Let's postpone the Big Plan, and enjoy this for now!" This is not your voice. It's the voice of the Beast, trying to make you delay your decision and panicking at the impending loss of its control.
Your declaration for the Big Plan could be: "I will never consume porn or masturbate again." This phrase embodies the essence of the Big Plan — a firm, unyielding decision that signifies your commitment to stay addiction-free.
In your journey to overcome addiction, the video I am about to share will be invaluable. It features Jack Trimpey, the founder of Rational Recovery, directly guiding you through the process of making a Big Plan. Although Trimpey focuses on alcohol and drug addiction in the video, his guidance applies to any addiction, including pornography and masturbation. Carefully absorb his words, understanding their relevance to your personal struggle.
watch this video, skip to 33:39 for the Big Plan section:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_n2YH8RLd_4&list=PLazOJVze5_z3BdcDSF3uPtN8Vu9VDqVJl&index=3where Conclusion
I've spent a month compiling my experiences and sharing the tools that aided me on my journey. You are free to ask questions while I'm around, but please note that I'm not a regular Reddit user and won't be able to answer indefinitely. For those interested in Rational Recovery, all the information you need is in the "Useful Resources" section. If you found this post helpful, please consider upvoting or sharing it with friends who might benefit from it. Always remember to dissociate from the Beast and stand firm in your Big Plan. Holding unwavering trust in your decision is the key to defeating the Beast. May you embrace your journey to freedom and experience the liberation you've been longing for. Thank you for taking the time to read my post.
Useful Resources
Rational Recovery Book :
https://www.amazon.fRational-Recovery-Cure-Substance-Addiction/dp/0671528580/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=rational+recovery&sr=8-1 AVRT Demonstration (AVRT Live Vol 1-5) :
https://www.youtube.com/@DeborahSpringborn/videos submitted by
IneverGiveUp01 to
pornfree [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 08:17 LordDurand Just found out my ex moved in with the guy she had a huge crush on
I want to close my eyes and, in an instant, be free of all feeling and never have to open them again.
She broke up with me at the beginning of the year. We had a long talk, and we both cried, but in the end she still left. A lot of things were said, and I don't know if she meant for them to be hurtful or not. She said I wasn't enough, that she needed someone who was masculine and dominant. But you knew what I was when you met me, didn't you? I get confused for a girl about 70% of the time, you knew that, right? And I always told you, from the very beginning, that I liked being the little spoon. That I wanted to be soft, to not have to live up to any of society's expectations of men, that I just wanted to feel safe and secure and protected with someone. That I wanted to feel like I, just by myself, with all my imperfections, with all the feminine parts of me that everyone is repulsed by, with everything I've always felt wasn't what a man should look like-- that I was still enough for someone. You knew all that. Why'd you stay for as long as you did if you hated all of it?
When we were dating, she told me she had a big crush on one of her guy-friends. I was always insecure about it because he was a lot more conventionally attractive, always had girls hitting on him, and was always single. But she assured me that she wasn't interested in him anymore. I guess I never could fully believe it.
Today I opened Venmo to transfer some money, and I saw that he'd been paying rent to her landlord, and that he was also sending her money for the wifi bill. I don't know for sure how long they've been living together now, at least a month. It's her life, she can do whatever she wants and be with whoever she wants, and I've tried to come to terms with that. But it just feels so unfair. That she gets to just move on like that and have someone else with her. And I'm still here, on my own, same as I've always been.
I've been trying to work on myself. I started doing Jiu-Jitsu to complement my kickboxing training, I started learning guitar and practicing every day, I picked up reading again, I got my motorcycle license, I got promoted. I feel like in just a few months, I've come so far. But I'm still stuck. Swiping on dating apps, getting maybe one match maybe every few months if I'm lucky, that usually turns up to be nothing. There was one girl I went on a few dates on, but she ghosted me.
And I just don't know what to do. My entire life, I've just wanted someone to feel at home with. Someone I can always go to, someone I can be totally, completely myself with, without having to put on any kind of face, without having to put on any kind of armor to face the harshness of the world. I don't want any of what I've done. I don't want to feel like I have to learn to fight, or to pick up random skills or hobbies, or ride on a dangerous two-wheeled machine, or have the position I do. I just want to be with someone. I want to love and to be loved, and that's it, that's always been it.
It's my birthday today. I'm 24 now. 24 more years than I needed or wanted. I remember all the times I was at a firing range with a gun in my hands, thinking about how in a single flash, I could be done with it all. And I regret that I'm still here. It feels like nothing will ever get better. It's like I'm trapped in an old shack in the midst of a harsh, never-ending blizzard. I can decorate the inside as much as I like, make it all pretty and inviting. But nobody's ever going to show up. In the end, it's still an old shack; the snowstorm outside is one that knows no lifting, and things will always be like this.
I have tried all that I can think of. This broke me completely. I don't know how I can keep going on like this. Every morning, I wake up and have nothing to be excited about. I can't imagine a girl ever being excited about me, wanting to talk to me and get to know me in every way she can.
I'm 24 now, but I still feel like the same stupid kid I was in high school. I still fall asleep in the same empty bed, staring at the same sparse ceiling with the fan I'm afraid to turn on because of how much it shakes and threatens to fall right off. And then all the same insecurities come flooding back, everything I thought I moved past. Where I once thought I'm okay being mistaken as a girl, that it's cool how androgynous I am, I realize how much it sets me back, how hard it is to find someone attracted to me. I come to resent my face, my eyes, my height, my hair, my body, my voice. Everything everyone else can perceive feels like a reason for them to steer clear, or just treat me like a little brother even if I'm years older than them.
When I was in middle school, where there was this clique of the popular boys, the cool jocks or whatever, I always wished I was one of them. Not in the sense of wishing I could be in that crowd, but that I was literally living in the body of one of them. I'd sing stupid mournful songs about it in the shower, I'd think about it as I fell asleep.
And today, it's not that different. Every night I go to bed, wishing I could wake up in a different body. Being rebellious, or an iconoclast, or something contrary to society's standards is a cool thing to talk about. Until it's forced upon you, until you can't match what society wants no matter how hard you try, until you can't fit in and you can't attract people to you.
When I was going to therapy, my therapist said something along the lines of how I'm more interesting than the typical "Abercrombie and Fitch white guy," and it was funny and made me feel a little better at the time. But I think I'd rather just conform. I'd rather just be conventionally attractive and fit right in and have my pick of whoever I wanted than be unique.
What's the point of having a unique life experience if there's no one to share it with?
I feel like I'm at the end of my line.
submitted by
LordDurand to
lonely [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 08:02 Edgar-Alan-Pug [FO4] Issues with 30 FPS Cap
Hello! Trying to fix my Fallout 4 as it wont go above 30 fps, I use the F4 Config tool as was recommended and changed the Vsync to 2, this made it way too fast, Vsync 1 only gives me 30 fps and 0 gives me 20 fps. How do I fix this? here is my mod list
0 0 Fallout4.esm
1 1 DLCRobot.esm
2 2 DLCworkshop01.esm
3 3 DLCCoast.esm
4 4 DLCworkshop02.esm
5 5 DLCworkshop03.esm
6 6 DLCNukaWorld.esm
7 7 Unofficial Fallout 4 Patch.esp
8 8 ArmorKeywords.esm
9 9 WorkshopFramework.esm
10 a Companion Infinite Ammo.esm
11 b CompanionIvy.esm
12 c Loads.esm
13 d NewCalibers.esp
254 FE 0 BerettaM9FS.esl
14 e Darlene.esm
15 f Z_Architect.esm
254 FE 1 AORobcoReconScope.esl
16 10 MoreBeards.esp
17 11 MoreHairstyles4Female.esp
18 12 MoreHairstyles4Male.esp
19 13 MiscHairstyle.esp
20 14 ManufacturingExtendedFH.esp
21 15 PowerArmorAutopilot.esp
22 16 AutomatronSDTank.esp
23 17 WorkshopRearranged.esp
24 18 ManufacturingExtended.esp
25 19 AutomatronSDTank500slrDesign.esp
26 1a MsAutomatronPartsCollection.esp
27 1b Magos.esp
28 1c Skitarii.esp
29 1d KSHairdos.esp
30 1e Z_Horizon_Loot_Respawn.esp
31 1f Z_Horizon_Loot_Respawn_DLC.esp
32 20 AllSetsExtended.esp
33 21 dD-Action Ragdoll Force.esp
34 22 MoreUniques.esp
35 23 WelcometoGoodneighbor.esp
GunnersOverhaul.esp
36 24 FALLOUT4WT.esp
37 25 Armorsmith Extended.esp
38 26 Krieg.esp
39 27 Tau.esp
40 28 BOCW Outfit Pack.esp
41 29 MyCart_Biohazard.esp
42 2a MutilatedDeadBodies.esp
43 2b Build High - Expanded Settlements.esp
44 2c def_inv_scrap_en.esp
45 2d FunctionalDisplays.esp
46 2e CBBE.esp
254 FE 2 CROSS_CoA.esp
47 2f Better Locational Damage.esp
48 30 The Eyes Of Beauty.esp
49 31 FF Cait Dirty.esp
50 32 BLD - Leveled Lists - DLC.esp
FunctionalDisplays-MISC-Vanilla.esp
51 33 OutcastsAndRemnants.esp
52 34 MojaveImports.esp
53 35 FunctionalDisplays-AID-WI.esp
54 36 FunctionalDisplays-Patch-DLC-ALL.esp
55 37 Better Explosives.esp
56 38 BE_Enhanced Grenades.esp
57 39 BattleRifle.esp
58 3a CompanionIvy_Nuka.esp
59 3b Better Locational Damage - DLC_Automatron.esp
60 3c Better Locational Damage - DLC_Far_Harbor.esp
61 3d Lots More Facial Hair.esp
62 3e LooneyLongfellow.esp
63 3f Better Locational Damage - DLC_Nuka_World.esp
64 40 Better Locational Damage - DLC_WWorkshop.esp
65 41 Better VATS - 0.75.esp
66 42 EFF.esp
67 43 EveryonesBestFriend.esp
68 44 spacefiddle_Follower-Stealth-Distance-Fixes.esp
69 45 Depravity.esp
70 46 The Train.esp
71 47 Faded Glory - Soundtrack Expansion.esp
72 48 AA FusionCityRising.esp
73 49 AA FusionCityRising - HotC.esp
74 4a RRTV_GoodneighborCondo.esp
75 4b W.A.T.Minutemen.esp
76 4c RRTV_HomesAndBunkers_Coastal.esp
77 4d Cotozic's Bunker Ravine.esp
78 4e DCGuard_Overhaul.esp
79 4f Stm_DiamondCityExpansion.esp
80 50 Vivid Waters.esp
81 51 RRTV_HomesAndBunkers_Starlight.esp
82 52 UniqueUniques.esp
83 53 CombinedArmsNV.esp
84 54 Minuteman Watchtowers.esp
85 55 DOOMMerged.esp
86 56 Wastelanders XM2076 by giggity12345.esp
87 57 ProjectValkyrie.esp
88 58 CompanionIvy_quest.esp
89 59 RRTV_SubwaySafehouse.esp
90 5a RRTV_CourierStations.esp
91 5b CompanionIvy_Mags.esp
92 5c mk14.esp
93 5d RussianAssaultPack.esp
94 5e WattzLaserGun.esp
95 5f SubmersiblePowerArmorRedux.esp
96 60 Wana_SA58.esp
97 61 LString_Bow.esp
98 62 Midwest Power Armor Evolution.esp
99 63 ellen.esp
100 64 DWUK_LexingtonInteriors.esp
101 65 ButtonsCompanion.esp
102 66 LooksMenu Customization Compendium.esp
103 67 ESAFC_Piper.esp
104 68 M1Garand.esp
105 69 RU556.esp
106 6a XM2010_SniperRifle_by_tooun.esp
107 6b ImiUzi.esp
108 6c LeeEnfieldNo4MkI.esp
109 6d AK74M.esp
110 6e RRTV_BoxcarHome.esp
111 6f Blues Radio DBR.esp
112 70 OWR_GOP.esp
113 71 BasementLiving.esp
254 FE 3 CROSS_BrotherhoodRecon.esp
114 72 P90.esp
115 73 P90NPC.esp
116 74 Reverb and Ambiance Overhaul.esp
117 75 Vivid Weathers - FO4.esp
118 76 Radiant Clouds and Fogs.esp
119 77 DarkerNights.esp
120 78 DarkerNights-Radiant.esp
121 79 DarkerNightsDetection.esp
122 7a FunctionalDisplays-AID-Vanilla.esp
123 7b DD_Khassar_De_Templari_Increased_build.esp
124 7c ImmersiveAnimationFramework.esp
125 7d ImmersiveScrapping.esp
126 7e K9TacticalHarness.esp
127 7f LongerPowerLines3x.esp
128 80 Lots More Male Hairstyles.esp
129 81 m82a.esp
130 82 MW-Krueger.esp
131 83 Metro Gas Masks.esp
132 84 Loads of Ammo - Leveled Lists.esp
133 85 M1Garand - AWKCR.esp
134 86 LongRangeBulletHoles.esp
135 87 Soviet_Communication_Radio.esp
136 88 M1A.esp
137 89 HRP_Mk23.esp
138 8a KSHairdos_oel.esp
254 FE 4 IAF - Far Harbor & Nuka World.esp
139 8b Better Explosives - Grenade Frequency 30.esp
140 8c LooksMenu.esp
141 8d Northland Diggers New.esp
142 8e Nexus_PMC.esp
143 8f AzarPonytailHairstyles.esp
144 90 PlatinumCurieV2.1.esp
145 91 Pip-Boy Flashlight.esp
146 92 PMC_extended.esp
147 93 Project Reality Footsteps FO4.esp
148 94 QuantumSoundwavesRadio.esp
149 95 Binoculars.esp
150 96 RadiantBirdsv05.esp
151 97 SA80.esp
152 98 R91M.esp
153 99 RemoteExplosives.esp
154 9a FV20_RSS.esp
155 9b AES_Renovated Furniture.esp
156 9c Sandbag Fortifications - Version 2C.esp
157 9d Quieter Settlements - Contraptions.esp
158 9e Quieter Settlements - Vanilla.esp
159 9f Quieter Settlements - Wasteland Workshop.esp
160 a0 P220.esp
161 a1 ReconPack.esp
162 a2 SettlementMenuManager.esp
163 a3 ShellRain.esp
164 a4 Stalker Suit.esp
254 FE 5 StartMeUpShaunDefaultAppearance.esp
165 a5 TheEyesOfBeauty.esp
166 a6 3dscopes-R91M.esp
167 a7 3dscopes-fnfal.esp
168 a8 3dscopes-g67.esp
169 a9 3dscopes-leeenfield.esp
170 aa 3dscopes-m1a.esp
171 ab 3dscopes-reconpack.esp
172 ac 3dscopes.esp
173 ad 3dscopes-robcorecon.esp
174 ae 3dscopes-ru556.esp
175 af 3dscopes-wattz.esp
176 b0 Thematic and Practical.esp
177 b1 PD_VisualReload.esp
178 b2 PD_VReload_M1Garand.esp
179 b3 PD_VReload_DOOMMerged.esp
180 b4 PD_VReload_MK14.esp
181 b5 PD_VReload_P90.esp
182 b6 TFRangerGear.esp
183 b7 PD_VReload_RU556.esp
184 b8 PD_VReload_ReconPack.esp
185 b9 PD_VReload_XM2076.esp
186 ba WestTekTacticalOptics.esp
187 bb WorkshopPlus.esp
188 bc g2m_Workshop_Nexus.esp
189 bd GR123 West Tek Tactical Gloves.esp
190 be Vivid Weathers - FO4 - Far Harbor.esp
191 bf Vivid Weathers - Natural Bright.esp
192 c0 Vivid Weathers - Nuka World.esp
193 c1 Workshop_Planters.esp
194 c2 M60.esp
254 FE 6 Horizon_DEFUI_Melee_Icon_Fix.esp
195 c3 Quick Save.esp
PD_VReload_WSE.esp
254 FE 7 ImiUzi_Addon.esp
196 c4 StartMeUp.esp
197 c5 Spare Railroad as Institute.esp
198 c6 StartMeUpRedux_Horizon.esp
199 c7 StartMeUpNukaWorldPatch.esp
200 c8 Eli_Faction Housing Overhaul - AiO.esp
201 c9 Z_Horizon.esp
254 FE 8 HorizonPatch_sushicid3.esp
254 FE 9 Wana_SA58_Horizon.esp
202 ca ABundleofTape.esp
203 cb ASH127.esp
204 cc HK_MP5.esp
205 cd HK_UMP.esp
206 ce Z_Architect_Extras.esp
207 cf Z_Extras.esp
208 d0 Z_Horizon_DEFUI.esp
209 d1 Z_Horizon_DLC_All.esp
210 d2 Z_Horizon_Timescale.esp
211 d3 DesertEagleNV.esp
254 FE a FCR_Horizon_Patch.esp
254 FE b PV_Horizon_Patch.esp
254 FE c OAR_Horizon_Patch.esp
254 FE d RobcoReconScopeHorizon.esp
MilitarizedMinutemen_Horizon_Patch_Green.esp
212 d4 Z_Architect_EnhancedSettlements.esp
213 d5 Z_Architect_EnhancedSettlements_DLC.esp
214 d6 Z_Architect_HomePlate.esp
submitted by
Edgar-Alan-Pug to
FalloutMods [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 07:47 cadrianzen23 First hand account of UAP 8 years ago
Hi all,
I just want to come out saying that I have zero proof or anything because it was such a random event, but I do have a witness in my ex who also saw this with me 8 years ago. Also not saying it’s an alien, but it absolutely happened.
I know everyone wants the smoking gun, but I figured I might as well share this with the only people who would be remotely interested. Here goes:
Southern California sky about 2014-2015 (will try to figure out exact year) I was visiting my exes girlfriends parents who live in Orange County a couple miles from the old El Toro Air Base. It was I wanna say about 11pm at night and the sky was deep purple my with medium high clouds not fully overcast but definitely cloudy.
We stepped outside for a smoke and walked across the street and sat on the curb to spark since we didn’t want to smoke next to the their home. As we’re chit chatting we’re both kinda looking up aimlessly and all of the sudden there is a MASSIVE black perfectly rectangular shape that flies overhead in complete silence. It was behind the clouds but it was immense. The strange part was for sure the shape and it’s size. It flies smoothly overhead, no lights, at a rate that didn’t appear quick but for its size it didn’t add up. My best guess is that it was a 400m wide and slightly longer to complete a rectangle.
I didn’t say anything for like 5 seconds and then turn to my ex and say “please tell me you just saw that?” And she says “yup, what in the world was that?” My mind instantly starts coming up with answers. I thought maybe it was spotlights projecting something? But that isn’t what spotlights look like. Too big to be a plane with no sound. Why was it that large? Balloon or gas? I was always interested in aliens so I tried to apply the usual suspects but none of it made sense.
I instantly checked Twitter for flying object local area and surf reddit go see if there’s anything but we didn’t see a thing. We both made a pact that we would not forget this story but he were super confused and don’t really know how to leave it.
It’s the only bizarre thing I’ve seen and hopefully someone with a bit more knowledge about flying objects and stuff can help answer this question for us. Otherwise, thanks for reading and apologies for not having enough details or evidence. I can still visualize it but it’s a while back now.
Edit: I just remembered I posted asking about it on Reddit when it happened! Here’s some clarification on the sighting:
The exact date was April 14, 2014 around 9ish PM PST. So not 8 but 9 years ago.
The shape was apparently circular and not a rectangle. Weird, I seem to remember it being square-ish but it was massive.
She actually asked me first, not the other way around. She does NOT believe nor care for alien stuff, so that validation from her asking me was important.
submitted by
cadrianzen23 to
UFOs [link] [comments]