The cronin china company minerva oh

Mine is a hot shower. Sure, I like playing roleplaying games and watching stuff on streaming as much as the next guy, but hot water on my skin? That's where it's at. Sometimes you have to appreciate the simple things in life.
There are other things I like, of course. Aside from the aforementioned roleplaying games (see the second half of my username to find out which ones), I'm a big fan of technology, hockey, and animals. I have 2 cats and a bearded dragon, and am happy to share pics of any of them!
I haven't talked about myself professionally yet, and that's because there isn't much to say. I'm still in college, because I took a looong break from it and worked retail for a while because of mental health issues and later the pandemic. I'm in an engineering field and am hoping that'll go well. So no, my shit is not yet together, but when it is together, it'll be REALLY together.
So... politics and religion. Touchy subject which I'm approaching with all the grace of a bull in a china shop, but suffice it to say, I'm an atheist and I'm pretty far to the left. I staunchly refuse to date a conservative (not that they'd be particularly interested in my "child murder" supporting ass anyway), but I honestly don't care if you believe in a higher power, the universe, reincarnation, the flying spaghetti monster, whichever you like. Just keep in mind that I won't believe in them.
Oh, and one other important thing I won't do - reproduce. My bloodline dies with me, as a friend once told me. I don't hate children, though I do feel a certain discomfort around them (was the youngest growing up, never really had to change a diaper or whatever), like I don't know what to say or how to behave. But that's not the main reason I don't want kids. Mostly it's because I have mental health issues that I've been struggling with throughout my life and I think that even if I did want to have kids, it would be selfish of me to pass that on.
Physically, I'm 135 lb, five foot five inches, I have brown hair, blue eyes and I'm white. Picture will be available upon request. I prefer women who are average or slender like me. Oh, and you can be any height, I don't care, I only mention it because you likely do and I don't want an awkward situation where you start talking to me and find out I'm too short for your liking.
Penultimate paragraph. What I'm looking for right now is intimacy of any kind really. Long term would be nice, short term would be perfectly acceptable. I find it difficult to meet people using apps (I'm a 5.5 on a good day, and I know it), and IRL I'm surrounded by 18-22 year olds who are either A) too young or B) have no interest in me.
P.S.
I'd like to share pictures early, and ideally video call early. I have no patience for women with "broken phones" as I've encountered time and time again. I'm sorry, that trick is just not believable if it's been the case with 4 separate women I've talked to on here. if you're not willing to prove you are who you say you are, I have no interest in you.

Mine is a hot shower. Sure, I like playing roleplaying games and watching stuff on streaming as much as the next guy, but hot water on my skin? That's where it's at. Sometimes you have to appreciate the simple things in life.
There are other things I like, of course. Aside from the aforementioned roleplaying games (see the second half of my username to find out which ones), I'm a big fan of technology, hockey, and animals. I have 2 cats and a bearded dragon, and am happy to share pics of any of them!
I haven't talked about myself professionally yet, and that's because there isn't much to say. I'm still in college, because I took a looong break from it and worked retail for a while because of mental health issues and later the pandemic. I'm in an engineering field and am hoping that'll go well. So no, my shit is not yet together, but when it is together, it'll be REALLY together.
So... politics and religion. Touchy subject which I'm approaching with all the grace of a bull in a china shop, but suffice it to say, I'm an atheist and I'm pretty far to the left. I staunchly refuse to date a conservative (not that they'd be particularly interested in my "child murder" supporting ass anyway), but I honestly don't care if you believe in a higher power, the universe, reincarnation, the flying spaghetti monster, whichever you like. Just keep in mind that I won't believe in them.
Oh, and one other important thing I won't do - reproduce. My bloodline dies with me, as a friend once told me. I don't hate children, though I do feel a certain discomfort around them (was the youngest growing up, never really had to change a diaper or whatever), like I don't know what to say or how to behave. But that's not the main reason I don't want kids. Mostly it's because I have mental health issues that I've been struggling with throughout my life and I think that even if I did want to have kids, it would be selfish of me to pass that on.
Physically, I'm 135 lb, five foot five inches, I have brown hair, blue eyes and I'm white. Picture will be available upon request. I prefer women who are average or slender like me. Oh, and you can be any height, I don't care, I only mention it because you likely do and I don't want an awkward situation where you start talking to me and find out I'm too short for your liking.
Penultimate paragraph. What I'm looking for right now is intimacy of any kind really. Long term would be nice, short term would be perfectly acceptable. I find it difficult to meet people using apps (I'm a 5.5 on a good day, and I know it), and IRL I'm surrounded by 18-22 year olds who are either A) too young or B) have no interest in me.
P.S.
I'd like to share pictures early, and ideally video call early. I have no patience for women with "broken phones" as I've encountered time and time again. I'm sorry, that trick is just not believable if it's been the case with 4 separate women I've talked to on here. if you're not willing to prove you are who you say you are, I have no interest in you.

Do any of you ship directly from China to Walmart's fulfillment warehouse. Do any of you ship directly from China to Walmart's fulfillment warehouse?
I'm new and trying to figure out the most cost-effective way to get products from suppliers directly to Walmart's warehouse, instead of having the suppliers send them to our company, where we repackage the products and then send them out to Walmart's WFS (Walmart Fulfillment Services).
Could you please assist me with the following:

1. Do any of you have experience with direct shipping from China to Walmart's fulfillment warehouse?
2. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this approach compared to our current method?
3. Are there any specific costs or fees associated with shipping directly to Walmart's warehouse?
4. What are the potential challenges or considerations we should keep in mind if we decide to pursue this shipping method?
5. Are there any recommended shipping companies or services that specialize in direct shipments to Walmart's warehouse?

Any additional insights or ideas on optimizing our supply chain and improving efficiency in delivering products to Walmart would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!

I tired of people telling me "work hard" "positive vibes" "you can attract what you want if you think about it and work for it" and ignoring every odds someone really have. Mental health guru said you're responsible for your actions and I agree, that doesn't mean sometimes the place where you are and the people you are competing in the rat race can take you down. You can make and effort and still lose. Nobody takes seriously that you make suffer from depression, or anxiety. They say "oh, you're just setting on your seat doing everything wrong, because you have to take responsibility of that" then you don't do it, so your family end up without something to eat.
How is that fair? There's nothing fair, but people want to thing it is, and that there's a order in this world. They don't respect shit, this is a man eating man type of world disguise as a "business" the same people I hated in highschool are the ones that rule everything.
Sometimes people are just mean, selfish, and know purposely that they are using a disguise, but say "better they than me" there's no hope for this world, I wish everything will just disappear, I wish I can disappear.
I don't even can express it... it's just that somethings things are wrong because they make it wrong, even when you try your best and get tired. But if you can cheat your results, that's the type of hardwork companies want. This world is going to shit.

This community was inspired by our own frustration in navigating the unregulated peptide research community. In doing so, we have compiled information about sourcing peptides, their legality, and the regulatory paradigm that surrounds the actual transaction (payment) for research peptides. When the broader peptide research community also learns about these facets, it will contribute to maintaining the legality and thus availability of research peptides.
ARE PEPTIDES ILLEGAL?
Peptides sold, obtained, and possessed for laboratory, research, and analytical purposes are generally legal. Laws and regulations will vary based on country and geographical location.
It is illegal to sell, buy, possess, and utilize peptides for purposes other than the aforementioned.
HOW TO SOURCE RESEARCH PEPTIDES
We’ve noticed that many peptide researchers are often inspired by information they hear about on social media, blogs, or in videos. However, oftentimes inadequate research is done in advance of acquiring or attempting to acquire peptides. This puts risk on the individual and on the broader peptide research community.
Research peptides can be obtained from online sources. They can also be obtained by a licensed professional at various clinics (both online and brick and mortar). It is very important to note that just because a clinic prescribes and/or sells peptides, they are almost invariably still sourced from overseas and there is no assurance of quality control. .
For the purposes of our research and this subreddit, we only do laboratory testing on US peptide suppliers. We also only use US testing laboratories (currently, we use two of them).
If you found this subreddit but are interested in peptides for medical use, please consult with a licensed medical professional.
The reason that many people appear not to do this, is that it can be very expensive, difficult to qualify, and not all peptides of interest may be available or indicated.
There are many online research peptide vendors, particularly lately. This is not inherently a good thing as it dilutes the pressure on any given vendor to perform rigorous quality control. Without third party testing, it is virtually impossible to know what you’re getting. Again, this was one of our primary inspirations for starting this community.
The vast majority of vendors are sourcing their peptides from China. A very small number of vendors are manufacturing them in the US. Small batch peptide synthesis has an approximate equipment (not including trained personnel) cost of over half a million dollars. Smaller or less experienced (newer) vendors are unlikely to be doing this. However, if one can identify vendors who are doing this, it is a very good idea in our experience.
Unlike testing one’s luck by ordering small-ish quantities of peptides from overseas, US vendors will provide some of the following additional benefits:
The vendor does all of the work – they do customer service and fulfil orders much more quickly than any sort of international import. They (hopefully) provide replacements when things go wrong. This gives the customer some assurance because there is an entity attached to the order.
They are also less expensive than when obtained from a clinic.
Fortunately or unfortunately, due to research peptides being unregulated, anyone can essentially be a “vendor” without oversight. At the same time, the customer is still likely receiving the same peptide they would have otherwise obtained from overseas themselves. Note – many people think that reliable overseas vendors will sell retail quantity numbers of peptides directly to consumers. This is rarely true, and often leads to being scammed.
This has left a gap for many bad actors to enter the space.
This doesn't mean that all vendors are getting quality peptides from China/overseas either. Some have been shown by researchers to either be dosed in inefficacious amounts, contain none of the actual compound that it should, and/or have completely different compounds than it claims to have.
You can read more about buying from Chinese suppliers here.
PEPTIDE SOURCING CHECKLIST
1. 3RD PARTY CERTIFICATE OF ANALYSIS (COA)
Even when a COA is posted by a vendor, it’s important that it is somehow verifiable. There is a large percentage of photoshopped/fake COAs posted online by vendors and affiliates. For this reason, some legitimate vendors do not post COAs on their website, but make them available upon request.
When reading a COA, purity tells you about the quality of the peptide. This confirms that they gave you the correct product.
Purity is usually more than adequate when comparing or testing peptides. It will give you a general idea about what is in your product and it can still be cost effective.
When also testing for quantity, it gets a lot more expensive. Vendors most typically rely on the tests they received from their Chinese suppliers instead of doing it themselves through a 3rd party lab. These tests cost several times more than purity-only tests, and are not often done.
It is easy for vendors to fake test results that they say they performed themselves. Others fake test results from labs to make it seem like they are 3rd party tested. This makes it important to be able to verify test results.
The lab tests that we have performed are done with testing facilities in the US who we can trust.
2. FORUM
The next best place to find information about vendors would be on forums. Namely this subreddit and our website.
Search through Reddit and see what others have said about their experiences with brands. Namely the customer service, scams, and shipping. These are anecdotal reports, and while we make a strong effort to hedge against vendor solicitation influencing these anecdotes, it is still possible that “recommendations” made by users are some forms of solicitation.
We don't see anecdotal posts or comments as a credible source for dictating the quality of a vendor. There is no way to prove their suggestion.
We have been doing our own anonymous buying from vendors and sending those samples in for testing. You can view these test results on our forum here.
We prefer to keep everything evidence based and let the COAs and tests speak for themselves.
WARNINGS
While you are looking for where to source your research peptides, you are more than likely going to see ads, chat requests, and comments/replies from vendors trying to manipulate users.
We advise you to be smart with engaging with anyone that engages with you for the aforementioned purposes. Check their post history and karma at very minimum (not always indicative of anything, but helpful).It’s likely best to just avoid blindly taking any random suggestions, particularly if made via “DM.”
A rule of thumb is that if anyone pushes in favor of, or against a vendor to a strong degree, likely has a vested interest as a vendor or affiliate.
Some vendors are not happy with the work we have been doing. They know they may be selling low quality peptides and they fear that we will randomly run a lab test on their products.
PURCHASING
Many peptide researchers do not understand that it can be difficult to obtain peptides from a payment perspective. We have an article about this here. In short, banks are the intermediary between merchants (vendors) and the credit/debit card brands. Based on rules and guidance from the card brands, banks make policies on what types of product/service types can be offered by merchants (vendors) for card transactions.
Many vendors who offer direct traditional card payment options for research peptides are engaging in what is called transaction laundering. This is the act of misrepresenting, in one or more ways, what they are selling to their bank/payment processor. This comes with serious legal risks that in some cases, can extend to the customers unknowingly.
When customers insist on using their card to buy research chemicals, they are creating the need for vendors to heavily focus on the huge hassle of payments, instead of things like customer service and quality control. All of the payment work-arounds like CashApp, PayPal, Venmo, etc. are also unsustainable. Once those companies realize that their apps are being used to facilitate the sale of these items, the accounts will get shut down. The only sustainable method for vendors and for customers is cryptocurrency.
Cryptocurrency is not difficult to use, and it removes middle men from a transaction so the customer and vendor can transact without requiring “permission” from an intermediary. You can buy cryptocurrency with a debit card or bank account easily. You will notice that vendors often incentivize the use of this payment method with discounts or by other means. Many vendors also add fees to be able to use some kind of card payment method. There is a reason for this.
Any peptide researchecustomer should be part of the solution, not part of the problem. We don’t want a community of peptide vendors who are fixated on payments to lure in buyers versus fixated on quality control, sustainability, regulatory compliance (legal, and banking/payment compliance).
ENDNOTES
We hope that you find this community and its content valuable and helpful.
If you have had any good or bad experiences, please write up a review and post it to the subreddit.
There is a review tag you can use to help others find it easier.
Peptide Source
DISCLAIMER
While we strive to always provide accurate, current, and safe advice in all of our posts, it’s important to stress that they are no substitute for medical advice from a doctor or healthcare provider. You should always consult a licensed healthcare/medical professional. The content we’ve included in this guide is merely meant to be informational and does not constitute medical advice. Peptides that are available to the vast majority of consumers are for research and laboratory use only. Only vendors that strictly adhere to this legal framework should be trusted, and NO VENDOR that insinuates or promotes (directly or indirectly) human use/consumption of peptides should not be supported by anyone in the peptide community, period. Particularly if the community would like these peptides to remain legally available for research and laboratory use without further regulatory intervention.

i dont when it happened. when i was 18 i was 47K in debt, id taken ever credit offer sense i was 15. 4K negative in my checking. good job but just terrible at money. maybe should have been obvious to not spend money you dont have but that compound interest.
by 20 id gotten out of it. a couple years from truly living on my own and soon to be out of the army. left into civilian life and everything changed. my life of things just being expected was over. everyone had their hand out... living on base was... such a culture shock. id expect its similar to a foreigner moving to America.
wish id reupped but. went to college, 1/3 in 08 hit and... right back in debt. using one card to pay another, got stuck in bull shit rent penalties. i cant tell you how much i wished to just have a single job that would let me work more hours to make more money instead of trying to juggle multiple but no place wanted to give full time because it cost the company's so much in benefits and overages.
gf wasnt working and we just kept sinking, our relationship fell apart. i went into addictions. never made minimum wage but also was not raking it in. back into debt of around 22K over the years.
god how i hated the system. money. fulltime/parttime crap. eating eggs and cheese with whole milk, taking the expired candy bars from work. just diving into video games as my escape from reality. half a decade of wasted everything...
as i got older i started to realize i was working just to live. nothing else. i landed a pretty good job through random connections that let me travel, be challenged, set my own hours. the first time in my life i was not thinking i should be grateful to have a job but that the job was lucky to have me. moving into the next job i negotiated a much larger pay jump - literally tripling my annual.
nothing else in life changed. just started hanging out with friends more, learning how to be social, trying to date but i was behind the curve there. then over the years... things just came together. when not living pay check to paycheck it.... its a feeling of just true freedom. oh work isnt doing well? so what? oh they might fire me? ok, fine. ill go get another job... like... it lets you truly have control when you can afford to go 6 months with out working.
got my first house a couple years ago. i work 3 days a week. i rent a room to a friend for well below market rates. my monthly expenses are about 120.00... everything else is extra. i dont worry about food, i can choose to buy random computer parts for projects or tools or what ever... the struggle has ended. i cant tell you exactly when it ended but its a good feeling that it has.
i look back now and see how much life i missed. i feel so upset about that, it eats at me.
​
i see this sub pop on my feed. stories of no food, of 20.00 being the difference between starving. crying over small donations. its been a long time for me but im so glad its over. but in that very thought lies the problem. im below median income these days (85K was median last i looked). i keep expenses low to live how i do. why should i feel happy that im not grasping for scraps anymore? why is that the barometer? i should think that we would ALL be happy when any full time job would provide a life style that allows for vacations, passion projects, to not starve. yet thats not where we are in this country. we feel thankful to not be starving, to not be in that tent we see on the side of the road as we drive to work. 'thank god ive got things so good compared to them'...
there is enough food and money in this world for everyone to make a living. there is no true freedom with out financial freedom.

Franchise Group Inc (FRZA) made impressive gains in after-hours trading, achieving a 12.9% increase. With a strong trading volume of 1,436,000 shares, it's clear that there's significant investor interest in the company.
Biocept, Inc. (BIOC) saw a strong performance in the after-market session, with shares climbing by 12.0%. The trading volume stood at 68,368, demonstrating considerable trading activity for this health-care company.
Babylon Holdings Limited (BBLG) experienced an 11.2% rise in the after-hours trading. Its trading volume totaled at about 712,679, indicating a good amount of investor participation in the stock during this trading period.
The after-hours session was robust for Avrobio Inc (AVRO), as the biotechnology company's stock increased by 11.0%. The trading volume during this session amounted to approximately 1,158,000 shares.
Celldex Therapeutics, Inc. (CLDX) showed a solid after-hours performance with a 10.8% rise. The company observed a trading volume of 166,057 during the period.
TransCode Therapeutics, Inc. (RNAZ) surged 10.0% in the after-hours. With a large trading volume of about 3,585,000.
Yext, Inc. (YEXT), a Search-as-a-Service platform, saw a positive trend in after-hours trading with a 9.7% rise. The trading volume for the company reached approximately 684,706 shares.
Grid Dynamics Holdings, Inc. (GDYN) ended the after-hours trading session with an 8.9% increase. This tech company had a trading volume of around 156,080, reflecting a moderate level of investor activity.
The shares of China SXT Pharmaceuticals, Inc. (SXTC) rose 8.7% in after-hours trading. The trading volume was about 556,993, indicating a steady level of trading activity for this pharmaceutical company.
Jupiter Wellness, Inc. (JUPW) had a good after-hours trading performance, with an increase of 8.1%. This wellness company had a trading volume of around 1,301, signifying a relatively low level of trading activity in comparison to the other companies.
Purple Innovation, Inc. (PRPL), a comfort technology company, ended the after-hours trading session with a 7.9% rise. The trading volume was about 114,033, signifying a modest level of trading activity.
Finally, VistaGen Therapeutics, Inc. (VTGN) saw a 7.0% gain in its stock during the after-hours trading. The trading volume of about 1,358,000 indicated a substantial level of investor activity.

Because this seems to come up a lot, I figured I'd put all of the drama surrounding what happened with Noodler's Ink into one spot so people can just link it. I'll try to keep my own personal ideas of this to a minimum except where I think context is more important than clear-cold-facts. This won't be super concise, but the TLDR of all the drama is this:
Noodlers put out, over the course of years, a couple different inks featuring Antisemitic labels. When called out originally, not much was done about this, but social media traction on this became very viral very quickly. Nathan issued an apology, and donated to the ADL, and took down not only those bottles but the labels of ANY ink with any depictions of other cultures/communities on the label as well. The fallout has been mixed with many people happy they did something about it and moving on and others boycotting the company for life.
Obviously, Content Warnings for political stuff, antisemitism, etc. from here on out.
I should also mention this is just going into antisemitic controversy and its fallout. Any opinions on quality control issues, feathering, pens, etc. are not included in this. Suffice to say, there are reasons people may dislike this brand outside of this drama, but none of that will be included here.
Nathan Tardiff owns/operates Noodler's ink. He has always been very open when speaking about his political viewpoints and is a very political person. And, according to the podcast I linked in this post, he also fashions himself as a history buff which is somewhat relevant.
As a side note for relevancy I think overall, is that Nathan has put out other inks over the years that have spoken to his direct political beliefs and have had general insensitivities. The two are heavily tied. Rino featured mask-wearing Rhinoceroses when the pandemic hit, and this was spoken about in the podcast linked as being a personal protest of sorts to mask mandates as he was an anti-masker. There are also more vague inks that have some harmful implications such as "Dragon's Napalm" and lots of inks named after Native Americans despite the fact Nathan nor the brand has any associations with native people which many would consider appropriation.
Now, we're at the start of the drama.
A few years back, Bernanke Red came out from Noodler's. It is hard to say WHEN this ink came out first, my preliminary research has not produced good results here, but it has been out at least since 2018. To my knowledge, the antisemitic label of Bernanke's red has existed since the creation of the ink, only recently being changed and taken down post drama fallout.
January 6th 2022 He came out with a new ink called Volcker Green. Some maybe important things to note are: this was posted on the 1 year anniversary the insurrection of the US, and as stated in the post Volcker's rule is meant to prevent corruption of banks. The label features former federal reserve chairs with Vockler (A christian man) with a halo on his head, and 2 others flanking him named Bernanke and Greenspan (both are Jewish) with horns on their head.
This is where I think it is worth stopping to mention that the harmful stereotype that Jews have horns has been a staple and pervasive in cultures across the globe for a Very, very long time. This comment provides some great links and a succinct way of explaining this for those who want more details here. I think it is also worth mentioning that many people may be unaware of this history and stereotype.
By the 12th, people were dropping the brand. Someone had posted on this reddit asking what was going on, and it was explained then that things were pretty not-okay. (My opinion here is because this was framed as a question and subsequently deleted and not outright showing what was going on like the May post, this did not get the same traction the other did and thus not the same exposure. This post had about 130 comments. The may post has 1,1k comments.) In this podcast discussion about this from Tokyo Inklings, (discussion starts at 30:50) Nathan has been called out for this before May 2022 when the real fallout started--but he did not change it until the May fallout. To quote the podcast: "The timeline on the surface was that people complained about these inks when they were released and then it was kind of like 'yeah yeah yeah.. whatever.' "
May 9th, 2022 this post on this reddit came out saying they'd never buy Noodler's ink again and clearly showed Bernanke Red's label. (This was the post I originally saw about the brand.) It features Bernanke in curved horns, with a forehead brand/tattoo of a common communist symbol, and words such as "debt addiction enabler" on it. This really seemed to be the post that sparked all of this coming to light undeniably. 1k comments later needless to say it was one of the busiest this reddit had been.
Stuff gets muddy here (and the podcast I linked sort of lays this strange timeline out better than I could), but on May 10th Goulet pens not really as a business but on a more personal note spoke of calling Nathan and saying he sounded very apologetic. "in all the years we’ve known Nathan, we’ve never known him to be antisemitic. Brian spent over an hour and a half on the phone with him tonight, and he was genuinely apologetic for his ignorance, to sum it up. If you know anything about Nathan, you know he is singularly laser focused on the issues of fiscal conservatism and freedom of speech, but unfortunately that has created some blind spots."
May 11th Noodler's themselves came out with an apology stating they had no idea that the pictures were directly linked to antisemitism, but that they would change them and donate to the ADL. (screenshot here if it's ever taken down)
That same day, Goulet said they were not carrying Noodler's products anymore. (screenshot)
Nathan pulled just about every ink he'd put out to change the labels of anything that could be seen as remotely offensive. It was a huge clean sweep because, as you can imagine, he had a Ton of them to change with this. 31 items to be exact according to the linked list + the two main ones posted.
Apologies and a burner month or so later, Goulet went back to carrying Noodler's after all the inks got rebranding.
Now. At this point. I would be remiss not to mention that there is a very long standing and closely knit tie between people who believe in conspiracy theories and antisemitism. " No critical introduction to conspiracy theories would be complete without a discussion of their strong and longstanding connection with antisemitism." There is also some very strong ties between far-right mentalities and antisemitism. There is more to break down here than one post can possibly allow, but the TLDR of this is that the venn diagram between these three is.. very circular. And, now-a-days, it is often on-brand for people into these things to give themselves plausible deniability. With social media posts getting people fired and saying something out loud plainly on video recording can ruin a career, people who have these sort of alt-right-far-right thoughts tend to... speak Around things. They don't Directly say "I hate Jews and Jews control the media" they will say "I hate the media and people pulling the strings behind the camera because it tries to control peoples' thoughts." When called out, "I had no idea there were Jewish people in media! I wasn't trying to be antisemitic!" Even if the only reason they believe this is due to the conspiracy theory that Jews control the media. There are lots of dog whistles for antisemitism, and often these are not well known and fly under the radar. People with antisemitic beliefs often bank on others not noticing or knowing so they can hide in plain sight, and deny if directly called out.
So, there are people with the viewpoint of: Lots of people do not know the history of horns and Jewish people, and it is easy to see how he might not have known that. Hell, I didn't know what most of my childhood songs were about growing up or that the star spangled banner has racist elements to it. He actually did something about it, and pulled Everything and changed it all which was probably at great expense to himself, and he apologized and donated money to the ADL. What more can people actually ask from a brand? People can learn and change.
(There are many, many more people with the viewpoint of I don't care about any of this drama and don't want to be involved in it.)
And there are people with the viewpoint of: He is a history buff. He's into conspiracy theories. He's into hard-right-leaning viewpoints and libertarian viewpoints. Dogwhistles are very present all over the place, Nathan undeniably used this imagery on multiple occasions and there is just too much here to believe he genuinely had No idea--at best he decided not to care or listen to the people telling him this was wrong. I do Not buy Nathan's apology that he had no idea this was directly antisemitic--especially as he had been told by other companies and people prior, and did not change it until this was hitting his wallet in a major way. (For full disclosure, I firmly am in this camp.)
I think it is also worth including this take on the clean sweep posted on the fountainpennetwork " I really have no idea why Nathan changed all of the ink names. Honestly, it feels reactionary and heavy handed in a "oh yeah? Well then I'll just chang ALL OF IT THEN!" as if to spite his face by cutting off his nose. Sure did manage to bring out the anti-PC police though, so maybe that was his goal: bring out the Whataboutists to dampen and soften the seriousness of the bottle imagery with constant refrains of "oh yeah? Well, what about...", creating false equivalences to somehow redeem putting horns on Jewish folks twice. But, if we want to analyze the sentiment of "where do we stop?", a good starting point may be to listen to any group that has, some within living memory, been oppressed, thrown into a concentration camp, or had an attempted genocide carried out to say that enough is enough when it comes to images and words that hearken back to that oppression. " (The irony that whataboutism was rampant in this thread is not lost on me.)
So, that's all the drama as best I can understand it. If there are serious and major corrections I will make them and appreciate anyone adding to it, I tried to make this as brief as possible without skimping on any contexts. I'm not a very concise person by nature.

CNSA

Over the past two decades, the People’s Republic of China has established itself as a major player in space, second only to the United States of America (and the Russian Federation, depending on who you ask). This has been an incredible achievement, and the Chinese people owe it to their world-class scientists, engineers, and other professionals who made this possible. Yet, this is not the end, but rather merely the beginning, with China’s space program seemingly having a very bright future. Unlike in the Soviet Union, where the space program was viewed as a program whose sole use was for propaganda, Beijing is aware of the massive economic benefits a space program can bring, from pioneering new technologies to even possibly allowing for the gathering of resources in space - the possibilities are seemingly endless.
The People’s Republic of China sees space as the “next big thing”, an area in which all great powers of the world will soon come to clash to secure their vital national interest. In order to ensure that China is placed at the very forefront of capabilities and investments in space, Beijing has decided to increase the budget of the China National Space Administration from roughly $9 billion annually to more than $15 billion, with it set to reach $30 billion by 2030. While this may seem like a large investment, it will constitute less than 10% of the budget for the People’s Liberation Army in 2030. The increased budget of the CNSA will allow it to develop a greater number of more complex and capable satellites, while also allowing it to prepare for eventual manned missions to Mars, as well as the establishment of a manned base on the moon.
The funds will also allow for an increased research and development budget, which will now be able to focus on new sectors and technologies. Already, the CNSA has made clear top priorities for the new R&D budget will be:

• advanced rocketry - especially engines
• satellite technologies
• space exploration
• space science

Additionally, the Chinese government will ensure a program is established which will nurture and retain talent within China’s space industry, thereby increasing the knowledge and abilities of the industry as a whole. Careers at the CNSA, for those who qualify, will be very attractive, not only in terms of salary but also in terms of opportunities, with promotions being handed out quickly to those who deserve them. A constant exchange between the academia of the People’s Republic of China and the CNSA and other parts of the Chinese space industry will be established, to make constant improvements on systems and processes, and build trust between these two groups. At top universities, the best and brightest of Chinese students will be allowed to enroll in programs which will see them learn at universities, all the while also already starting jobs and internships within China’s space industry.
In a first, the Chinese government will seek to commercialize its operations, opening the door for private companies (which must be Chinese) to become an active part of China’s space industries. While some in the CNSA have decried this plan, China must recognize that private companies can spur development of new technologies, attract further investment and also spur economic growth. It will provide the possibility for more Chinese companies and businesses to help leverage their expertise to put China on track to become the world’s true space superpower. The CNSA will cooperate with private companies, and will invest in startups, in order to create an innovative, vibrant and thriving space industry ecosystem which will bring China’s unmatched academic and industrial capabilities into the fight.
With this increased investment, the China National Space Administration will begin an out-reach program, supported by the Chinese Communist Party, to the Chinese people. China Central Television, as well as other major television channels, will begin to introduce many segments on the importance of space, as well as on the work of the China National Space Administration. Schools will introduce voluntary special projects that in some way are related to exploring space. Beijing hopes that this push will inspire a new generation of Chinese engineers, scientists, and taikonauts to take up the mantle. It has been recognized by the CCP that Public support and engagement are vital for sustaining long-term growth and success of the CNSA.
President Xi Jinping himself has commented on this new “space push” by the People’s Republic of China:

“The work of the Chinese National Space Administration has never been so important. Today, as we embark on a journey which will take us to Mars and beyond, let us strive for a better world, a world in which humanity unites, transcends boundaries and truly becomes the master of its own destiny. The People’s Republic of China is willing to cooperate with any partner to aid humanity in becoming a civilization of the stars, and not simply the earth. - Xi Jinping, President of the PRC

Just need to rant… At my (relatively prestigious) school, they decided a decade or so ago that since more students are going straight to grad school, every master’s student need a compulsory “preparing for real working life” course. I won’t go into details, but you basically do some kind of practical work experience solo or in a team, have a presentation and then write a report based on what I have found is quite … sketchy literature. I think the main textbook is written by the dude who is in charge of the course. The credit load is 1/4 of a full time term. So hardly a huge course.
So…. I’m a mature age student with 20 years professional work experience after completing my BA. I’be climbed the ladder in my profession and am now senior level. I’ve been employed in the private and public sector, in small and large institutions, and I even successfully ran my own company for a few years.
The “practical” assignment plus paper is similar to what I do several times in a given week. Like, my actual job? I do shit and then evaluate and report ? It’s what professional employees DO!
I applied to be exempted from this course for OBVIOUS reasons. I wrote a ridiculous, detailed letter, provided a ton of examples of my work, and included reference letters from all my current and previous managers, and of course attached my resume.
Today I received an email that nah. They write black on white that I haven’t proven that I’ve collaborated with other professions. I need to reflect more on what that entails.
I am livid. Now I need to have some 26 year old child (sorry to all 26 years out there) whose primary work experience has been as a barista over summer lecture me on how “working life” actually operates and then bloody grade me on it. If I don’t, no MA for me. Oh and I need to take two weeks unpaid leave from my adult job which pays the bills I, as an adult home owner and parent in an adult life, kind of need to pay. In order to do low level pretend work at a museum or something (I’m not allowed to use my actual job to gain this valuable work experience, you see.)
This stuff makes me despise modern academia. F off. I’m in this degree program because of the actual discipline. Not because of this kind of bullshit
I want to complain, but how do I even argue with this level of stupidity?

I was suspended from Facebook in mid April. It is the second time this has happened. The first time lasted perhaps three weeks and my account was magically restored. This time, however, it seems that's not going to happen. Once again, I have no clue as to why this action occurred. I post mainly art, music, poetry, photographs, Buddhist info, etc. Oh, I get into occasional political skirmishes (I love to harass Ted Cruz), but I don't get out of line. I'm a 75 year old man.
Facebook is a means to stay in touch with friends, kids, grandkids, and that in the world which delights the soul. I miss it terribly. I have also been a shareholder of significance for nearly a decade and I am appalled at how the company treats its patrons.
If you have successfully regained your account through the California Attorney General, I would love to hear some specifics. Can I appeal via email or the CAG website, or must I submit a written letter? Any guidance as to what I should include in my appeal will be welcomed. Thank you in advance!

Five Intro
John F. Kennedy: For time and the world do not stand still. Change is the law of life. And those who only look into the past or the present are certain to miss the future.
The screen transitions to showing Kennedy in black and white, sitting at a table with Fidel Castro.
John F. Kennedy: I said, 'are certain to miss the future'!
Fidel Castro: [laughs] Coño... I missed that.
Robert McNamara walks into the room towards Castro.
Robert McNamara: Prime Minister Castro, this missile crisis was the last straw. We almost blew ourselves up. Now we invited you here today...
John F. Kennedy: In good faith!
Robert McNamara: ... in good faith, to sort this thing out.
Robert walks back towards John F. Kennedy.
Fidel Castro: (pointing at Nixon) And why is he here? He lost!
Nixon is shown sitting left of them at the table, annoyed at Castro's remark.
John F. Kennedy: As I always say, forgive your enemies, but remember their names. Now gentlemen, as I like to think, in the long history of the world, that there are only a few generations...
Noises are heard in the background.
Richard Nixon: (looking frantic and ducking) Sounds like someone breaking in...
John F. Kennedy: Just the storm, Dick. Sit down.
Zombies appear smashing a window on the other side of it, making noises and breaking through.
Richard Nixon: Oh my God!
Robert McNamara: It appears the Pentagon has been breached.
John F. Kennedy: Zombies. Gentlemen, at times like these our capacity to retaliate must be and has to be massive, to deter all forms of aggression.
Kennedy walks over to the wall behind him and hits a button, which makes the wall flip around to show an armory of weapons.
John F. Kennedy: Gentlemen, lock and load!
The screen turns black.
Fidel Castro: Viva la Revolution.
Screen then shows the four of them coming out of the armory. (Left to right) McNamara with a Stakeout with Grip, Kennedy with a China Lake, Castro with a Bowie Knife and a Python and Nixon with two HS-10s.
Robert McNamera: Any last words, Mr. President?
Richard Nixon: Yes Jack, any superlative words of inspiration for your humble troops?
John F. Kennedy: Do not pray for easy lives, my friends. Pray to be stronger men.
The group cocks their guns as the screen fades into color, and then the intro ends.

With manufacturers like BYD on the rise in China, can you imagine them taking significant market share in Europe and the US soon? The way I see it, there is a large risk for companies such as Volkswagen that are already getting pushed out of the chinese EV market. Will they soon threaten them outside of Asia?

Hiiii vacuum people! long story short my gf is depressed and vulnerable and a Kirby salesman showed up at our door while I was at work yesterday.
She sent me a video of them doing a demo with the pads on the couch and I was like “oh, aren’t those a scam?” And she said “no, they’re awesome, my mom had one. I’ve wanted one since I was 15!”
I know she was feeling low and just wanted to feel good but I also knew that this shit is a scam and so I looked them up and found all the horror stories about the company. I looked them up on eBay and sent her a photo that the Avalir 2 was like $300 including shipping on eBay. I told her to try to haggle them down if she really felt she must buy this. I knew they would probably still be there when I got home, based on what I read about them staying in everyone’s house for 6 hours. I knew she is kind and would feel for this young salesperson and that combined with her being in a rough patch sounded like a recipe for a huge and costly mistake.
I didn’t try super hard otherwise to talk her out if it because I knew it wouldn’t matter and that she had already decided to do it from how she sounded in the video.
I got home to a bunch of vacuum attachments spread out on the really clean couch sitting next to $2000 in cash, and 2 salesmen in our house. I was not happy and excited like she was and they packed up pretty quick when they saw me frowning.
Of course I was upset, and she was upset that I wasn’t excited and ruined her one happy moment, and obviously issues are not just about the vacuum but she has expressed today that I made her feel even worse about herself bc of course it was dumb to spend so much on this, so now she sees how it was kind of unreasonable.
She wouldn’t tell me how much it was, and when we talked she said she talked them into giving her free tile/grout cleaning attachments and giving her a low interest rate since she has good credit so instead of $1300 in interest she will only pay $100. But I’m not quite sure why she’s having to finance anything if she literally handed them $2000 cash (she did, I saw.) unless they told her it’s $3500 and she just said great let’s do it and that was it.
TLDR- my gf put $2000 cash down on a fucking Kirby while I was at work yesterday.
1- I heard you can return it within 3 days, and they will make it hard for you bc obviously they don’t want to lose the sale. Is this true and if so how could we go about doing that? And would it possibly be harder since they got cash?
2- if she was your loved one, what advice would you give her?
I feel like if we could return it we could definitely get the same exact shit for $500 max and then it wouldn’t be as big of an issue/stress.
P.S. we have wood and tile floors throughout the whole house and only one or two rugs that aren’t very big. The only other thing that really needs cleaned is the couch, which does get pretty dirty pretty often from our dogs.

Two weeks ago, I spoke on the phone with Tom Ono, the manual writer for Heroes of Might and Magic III. As usual, Tom asked how things were going. I said things were good... then proceeded to whine and complain for the next five minutes (much to Tom's amusement).
When the conversation concluded, Tom said, "Don't complain too much. Some people would give their eyeteeth to be in the game industry." I responded, "Who are these people and why haven't they been beaten for their own good?"
My name is Gregory Fulton, game designer for Heroes of Might and Magic III (developed by New World Computing, published by 3DO). You may call me Greg. Like most game designers, I'm sure you'll find me a bitter and cynical man, aged beyond my years, full of sarcasm, and inexplicably drawn to the horrors of game production like a lobotomized moth to the "pretty" flame.
As I guide you through your weekly tour of my memories, I promise the recollected images will be truthful and sincere but written with a smirk and a wink.
Undoubtedly, we will interact with the following animals: artists, level builders, managers, producers, programmers, testers, and monkeys. To help ensure your safety, I request you fasten your seat belts, keep your hands to your sides at all times, and be sure to not make any quick and sudden movements. Remember... we will be passing through the game production process.

12/05/98
It's Saturday. I'm at work with three other members of the Heroes3 team. I'll be in again tomorrow.
Smells like "crunch time."
Everyone in the game industry knows the term "crunch time." Those not in the industry may ask, "What is crunch time?" Long hours: 10-18 each day. We're starting our fourth crunch month. We have at least one more after this.
Bad take-out food: Mexican and Chinese food are New World's favorites. Today we had Taco Bell and Domino's pizza as part of NWC's "work for food" program.
Social Life: To work in the game industry you must already have some form of social retardation. When crunch mode begins, you may only speak in code to coworkers. Immediate family and friends may be seen on brief occasions so they don't file a missing-persons report. I'm one of the lucky ones; I don't remember having any friends or family.
Hygiene: Haircuts and showers become optional in favor of more sleep time. For me, showers are a must, but my hair is sprouting wings and a tail. Pretty soon I'll look like the lead singer from Flock of Seagulls.
Stress: Anger and frustration are frequent companions. If bridges are burned, this is usually the time. Earlier this week morale was low. In a fit of anger concerning team interactions, I was heard shouting, "I feel like a kindergarten teacher. Can't everyone just keep their hands to themselves and play nice!"
Murphy's law: Any potential hazard will be encountered. I'm writing this diary from the NWC conference room. My computer refuses to function for more than five minutes without seizing up.
12/06/98
This weekend I'm taking care of my PR duties (hence this diary). Not the most exciting stuff, so I'll relate a short story from earlier this week.
David Mullich (producer), Mark Caldwell (NWC vice president and programmer), Jon Van Caneghem (NWC president, creator of all things Might and Magic, and company design visionary), and I found ourselves crowded into the sweltering office of Scott White.
Scott did all the town screens in Heroes III except the Rampart, Necropolis, and Fortress. Since he finished his 3D duties, he's turned his skills to the game's interface. Believe it or not, we were in Scott's office arguing about color: interface colors and player colors.
After much arguing about the interface colors, we decided to leave it virtually untouched. Player colors were a different subject.
Originally, we used light blue, dark blue, red, green, purple, brown, black, and white. These colors needed to change. Light blue looked like the blue used in the main menu. Brown clashed with the brown used in the general game interface. Game text disappeared against white. Black and green disappeared with the terrain colors shown on the game mini-map.
OK. We agreed some of the colors needed to change. After this, the agreements stopped. I don't know what is more ridiculous... arguing over what colors to use or the twisted logic behind the arguments. Red, blue, and dark green were safe choices. We still needed five other colors. The conversation went something like this....

"I don't want yellow. Yellow is the urine color."
"What about brown?"
"I don't like brown."
"Brown is the s**t color."
"What about pink?"
"Pink is a sissy color."
"We won't call it pink. We'll call it 'rose'."
"Rose?"
"The rose player?"
"I don't know. If I saw a pink hero, I'd turn and run away. You know any hero secure enough to use pink as his color is bad ass."
"What about magenta?"
"What about cobalt? What about cadmium?"
"Have we accounted for all the fecal colors?"
"What about orange?"
"Phelan (our art lead) doesn't like orange. It looks bad."
"So. I don't think it looks bad."
"Fine. You tell her you want orange."
"She'll kick your ass."
"Oh. Fine. We won't use orange."

So it went. Fifteen minutes later everyone agreed to disagree, and Jon was made the final judge. Here are the final colors: red, blue, yellow, green, orange, purple, aqua, and rose (pink).
12/07/98
Today we stopped all map production. From here until we ship, I join the mapmakers and testers in playing maps and writing bugs... or so I thought.
Today, I had dropped into my lap the assignment of converting the 144-plus pages of the game manual into a help file. Anyone who has written a help file knows how huge this task can be. I could probably finish it in a day, but it requires no one bothering me for an extended period of time. Ha!
At this late stage of the production cycle, my entire day is spent meeting with people, making sure people are doing their work, and confirming that what is being done is correct. I don't have time for work. I've made the ugly evolution from game designer to middle manager.
It wasn't like this at the beginning of the project. At the beginning of the project the game designer is the screaming prophet, lost and alone in the desert (or the design process if you prefer).
In the middle of the production process the prophet is being screamed at by all his fellow coworkers who are wondering what to do because the design doc is behind schedule.
At the end of the project, everyone's a screaming prophet, and everyone is screaming at everyone else.
Sometime in the middle of all this screaming I've got to write this help file. Maybe I could give the assignment to Christian Vanover (H3 assistant director). Isn't it the job of a middle manager to delegate?
12/08/98
Yesterday I was wondering where I would find the time to write the game help file. Today I have the answer.... I think I have the flu. This doesn't feel like any 24-hour "see-ya-bye" flu either. This feels like "kneel before Zod!" flu.
All right. I've got a story for you.
Earlier today we "officially" stopped making maps. From here on out, we play, test, and polish the game. This could mean a little, or a lot. If the maps play well the first time out, revisions will be minor. If we end up chucking whole maps, we may find ourselves back to making maps. Thus, we started playing them today. JVC (Jon Van Caneghem, New World's president) ended up playing a notorious map named "Barbarian Breakout."
Ten minutes after he starts, JVC pages me over my phone intercom: "Hey Yoda." (He's been calling me Yoda lately. I don't know why. I'm not sure if I should be honored or offended. On one hand, Yoda is wise and he trains Jedi Knights. On the other hand, he is a short ugly green dude with big ears.) "Enemy hero with six behemoths (one of the highest-level creatures) knocked on my front door on week two, day one."
"Oops. I'll be right there."
As soon as I walked into JVC's office, the razzing began.
"What's with the six behemoths? Is this one of the balanced scenarios?"
"OK, OK. Something's wrong. Turn off the fog."
Jon restarts the scenario, turns off the fog of war, ends turn four times in a row, then right-clicks the enemy hero to see the extent of his forces. Aside from his other three stacks of creatures... he has one stack of six behemoths. Oops.
"All right. Open the map in the editor."
Jon opens the map in the editor. What do we discover? First, the enemy hero starts at level three, and the mapmaker (Dave Botan) has given him four stacks of creatures. In addition, the enemy hero's starting town has three of seven creature generators already prebuilt.
No wonder the enemy was able to recruit behemoths on day four.
Remember the story about the father who comes home from a bad day at work and yells at his wife? She in turn yells at her kid. The kid in turn kicks the dog.
At this point, I'm looking for a dog to kick. So, I hunt down Dave Botan. Immediately, Dave states his defense.
"Everyone says the map's too hard. It isn't. The AI's cheating." (Recently, we discovered the artificial intelligence was exploiting an undiscovered bug allowing it to recruit more creatures than were actually available.)
"The AI doesn't need to cheat. It's already got a huge advantage."
"There's a bug."
"Doesn't matter. Set all players to normal starting conditions."
At this point everyone begins to playfully dog-pile on Dave telling all the reasons why his maps suck. In the end he relented and fixed the map.
12/09/98
I'm not writing from work today. I'm writing from home. I have seven-way-straight-from-the-bottom-of-the-Amazon-flu.
With this kind of flu the logical course of action would be to rest, drink lots of fluids, watch lots of movies, maybe see a doctor. However, I am a game designer and unfamiliar with the ways of logic. A day at home with the flu means I have the opportunity to finish the H3 help file.
Wow.
How pathetic can you get? On my day off to rest and get better, I use the uninterrupted time to convert a 144+ page manual into a help file.
I should get sick more often. I get more work done.
12/10/98
I'm back at work today. Good news... I finished the help file. Bad news... I still have the flu, and because I was so efficient in writing the game help file... I've been given the task of writing the map editor help file. Oh yeah, finish it by Monday.
Monday? There's so much pressure in my head, when I sniff, my eyes want to flee their sockets. My voice has the auditory consistency of sandpaper. Monday? Sure, I'll have it done by Monday.
12/11/98
Well, it's Friday night, and I have yet to see Star Trek: Insurrection. Doubt I'll be seeing it anytime soon.
One of the unmentioned symptoms of crunch time is cultural unawareness. In my time at a previous company I almost missed the entire O.J. trial. I haven't seen a movie since Starship Troopers. I'm not kidding.
12/14/98
I shouldn't have come in to work Thursday and Friday. It really pushed me over the edge. For the past two days I've been laid up with fever and chills. Remarkably, it was the one thing to take my mind off work. Aside from a froggy throat, it seems to have passed.
Enough about my illness. From here on, assume I'm always ill with the flu.
12/15/98
Today NWC (New World Computing) took a brief pause from game development to listen to Trip Hawkins (president of 3DO, NWC's parent company).
Twice a year, Trip makes a formal visit to talk about the company and where we're going as a company. It's a nice break from things.
However, Trip wasn't half as exciting as David Richie (our tools programmer) who sat next to me. Turns out David is coming down with the flu.
Over the course of the meeting, the air conditioning didn't turn on. With over 50 people crammed into a room, it got hot very fast. As the minutes passed, I could see David slowly whither.
I thought he was going to vomit. So basically, for most of the meeting, I sat envisioning how I was going to get out of the way when the volcano erupted.
Luckily, the volcano did not erupt. David left in the middle of the lecture and I haven't seen him since.
12/17/98
Welcome to the end of another working day at NWC. There is still no sign of David Richey. Another one of our programmers, John Krause, called in sick today. David Mullich (the Heroes III director) was ready to take bets on who would call in sick next. Of course, everyone blames me for getting them ill.
As far as your average NWC workday goes, this one was hectic and full of revelation.
Revelation?
Yes. Revelation. Only today did I look at my calendar and realize Christmas was next Friday.
Hectic?
Yes. Hectic. Every now and then I need to wipe my desk clean. This means catching up on all the hand-scrolled notes and stray post-its littered about my desk. When my desk is clean, I'm caught up.
This very act of cleaning makes for a semi-chaotic day. There is much gear shifting and subject changing to close dangling issues.
Add to this my usual parade of visitors, and my first chance to test multiplayer, and it takes great effort to avoid turning into a screaming monkey. Yes, I said screaming monkey.
Frequently, I find myself held hostage in my own office as a line of visitors (testers, programmers, artists, producers, etc.) quickly assemble outside my office in a short period of time, all wanting a piece of my brain.
Today it happened to occur while I was in the middle of a multiplayer game with Jeff Leggett (H3 multiplayer programmer). Simultaneously, I had three people show up and cram themselves into my small office. Each began jockeying for position to ask a question. Meanwhile, Jeff waited on the phone intercom, with Heroes III continually chiming in the background, letting me know it was my turn to play.
At this point you may apply the screaming monkey metaphor.
Despite the great potential for chaos, I asked Jeff to wait, gave my three suitors a number, told them to wait in line, then answered each of their questions.
On the surface, everything looked under control. Little did these poor souls know there was a screaming monkey, trapped in my mind's steel cage, wildly thrashing about in a desperate attempt to escape and turn me into a volcano of anger and lunacy.
When it was over, I took a deep breath, noted the walls weren't sprayed with the blood of innocent coworkers, and returned to my multiplayer game with Jeff.
Heroes II multiplayer wasn't friendly in the least. When it wasn't your turn, all you could do was sit at the computer and stare at the screen like a moron.
Well, thanks to our wonderful network programmer, Jeff Leggett, a moron you will no longer be.
Jeff has finished implementing multiplayer support. Now we're on a bug hunt. So, today, Jeff and I played a multiplayer game in the background while we went about our work.
I must admit, I had a blast. Moments like this make me forget my job is serious work.
12/18/98 Friday
Today I actually managed to catch up on all my notes. Next up, International Translation Kit. It can wait until Sunday. I don't get to enjoy these moments of accomplishment very often.
Being a game designer is nothing more than a life of delayed gratification. You spend the first month of the project "being creative," then spend the next 17 as a bricklayer implementing low-level details and boot-strapping the game design when unforeseen consequences arise.
Tomorrow we have our annual company Christmas party. I won't be going. I see my coworkers every day at work. I don't want to see them in a social environment. It'd be too weird. They'd have, like, spouses and dates and stuff, and wear dress clothes.
We've been told we can dress formal or casual. To me this means torn jeans and a food-stained white T-shirt. To everyone else, this means dress formal, because no one wants to underdress.
I don't want to see any of my coworkers dressed up. The thought frightens me. We're a bunch of geeks. We don't look good in casual wear. Formal wear will only amplify our geekiness.
Only one thing could entice me to go to the Christmas party - seeing the wives go off on the management for working their husbands so hard. I'd pay to see that... provided I wasn't on the receiving end.
By the way... hello to Chris Cross and Brian Reed, two friends I made when I briefly worked at Dreamworks Interactive (I didn't work on Trespasser). They called me today. They'd read the first entry in the Designer Diary and called to tell me what they thought. They then tied me up on the phone for the next 30 minutes while simultaneously sending me e-mail with bizarre and obscene attachments.
01/02/99 Saturday
Well, I'm back at work. The Christmas break was needed. I spent the first three days drinking eggnog, sleeping in 12- and 16-hour shifts, and watching Clinton get impeached.
After I was well rested, the eggnog was all gone, and Clintion was impeached, I did what any game design loser would do... worked on the game while on vacation. Ugh. I'm so pathetic.
My initial goal was to play existing maps. After playing five maps, it was obvious the AI hadn't been fully tested. It tended to sit back and never struck out until it had enough forces to guarantee a win.
This made for very extreme game experiences. Either you never saw the AI, or it came storming out of nowhere, knocked on your door, and politely introduced itself as your doom.
When our AI programmer (Gus Smedstad) gets back from vacation, I'll need to share my findings with him.
Well, seeing as I couldn't really play the game, I turned my attention to our 144-page game manual... much to my horror.
It turns out our second draft of the manual was full of errors. So, with red pen in hand, I promoted myself from game designer to fact checker. Over the next three days, I proceeded to bloody the pages of our beautiful manual.
To say it was tedious would be an understatement. When it was all over, I couldn't read anything if it wasn't written in fine print.
01/04/99 Monday
Today was another screaming monkey day. Why? One word: programmers.
I won't say who, but one of our programmers came into my office and proceeded to yell at me over a feature request he'd been given to program.
Why was he yelling at me? On the surface, it was because I hadn't given him enough details, or I hadn't thought through its impact enough. Or it could have been because it was simply a stupid feature, I didn't know what I was doing, and I was ruining the game.
The real reason? He wasn't sure how to program the task he'd been given, and the specified time frame was short. Instead of calming down, thinking it through, and telling me whether it could or could not be done in the given time frame, he panicked, and chose to vent at me.
Programmers are a unique breed. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em. Some of my best friends are programmers.
I must admit I am fascinated. I've watched each of our team programmers code. It's very amusing. How they code gives me a unique insight to their personality. For instance...

John Bolton (lead programmer): When John programs, it looks like he's playing chess.
David Richey (tools programmer): David doesn't code. Beforehand, he thinks about his task in depth, like contemplating philosophy, then simply writes it up. Quite often you can look through David's office window and see him bent over in his chair, chin on fist, like The Thinker.
Mark Caldwell (NWC VP): You need to know Mark to really understand, but when Mark codes, it's like he's in a boxing ring, ducking shots, trading blows, and trash talking with the program.

Now take such individuals and do the unthinkable... Make them into a team. Worse yet, force them to have meetings in which they must interact on a social level and agree to work together. Worse yet, force them to interact with right-brained artists and game designers.
It's a wonder any games ever get made.
Join designer Greg Fulton as gives us his very last Designer Diary entry, which tracks the last days of Heroes of Might and Magic III. In these last few days, the team waited anxiously to approve the gold candidate. But there is no rest for Greg, as he mentions a little something about the expansion disc. Join us as we count down the final development of Heroes III.
01/07/99
Ever heard the phrase "thousand tile stare"?
It's a phrase used by our mapmakers. You get the thousand tile stare from making H3 maps all day long.
Today I got the thousand tile stare after making a map for our eventual game demo.
It's a very simple, small map, letting players experience a portion of the game. Hopefully they'll experience enough and feel compelled to buy the game. I've been calling the map "Dead and Buried."
When I finished, I gave it to Chris Vanover (H3 assistant director) to play. Chris is an expert Heroes player. He's a good gauge of the map's difficulty.
Watching Chris play was a lot of fun. It allowed me to take a break from work and finally see the game in action. However, I am the worst person to have over your shoulder when you play.
Why? I'm a backseat driver. It's a bad habit from playing console games with friends.
Thus, I watched Chris play and second-guessed him all the way. We were like two old men spitting and complaining about the best strategy as Chris clicked his way through the game. It was rather humorous.
01/08/99
Today I gave the Dead and Buried map to a few select people to see if anyone could beat it in the allotted time frame of four game weeks.
One of my candidates was Jen Bullard. Jen is the only female tester in the QA area.
Upon entering the test area, I found Jennifer burning a candle at her desk. She wasn't afraid to comment aloud how everyone else in the test area doesn't wash their clothes often enough. She thinks they stink.
No sooner did I sit down to watch Jen play than the verbal bantering between the testers began.
Ryan Den, another one of our testers, was sure he found a bug and asked aloud if anyone had encountered the same bug. No one had. Immediately everyone began shouting "user error." Ryan thought they were all high... until he realized it was user error. Everyone then proceeded to playfully tear into Ryan yet again.
I must admit, our testers are pretty cool. Their interactions are quite amusing. They banter with the voracity of a knife fight, but it's rarely cruel.
01/14/99
Last night was my last chance to revise the game manual. Thus, I decided to pull an all-nighter to finish it. This was my first time being at NWC so late. I also experienced something completely new.
I had been drinking many free Cokes when my bladder reminded me who was really in charge. Without hesitation, I raced to the bathroom. I opened the door. It was dark. This is not unusual. The lights are hooked up to a motion sensor. To save energy, they turn on and off based on the presence of a moving body. Confident the lights would turn on, I strode into the bathroom.
The lights did not illuminate.
Fumbling around in the dark, I was able to find the light switch and flip it on.
Nothing.
Fumbling around some more, I found the door handle and exited the bathroom.
Moving quickly to Mark Caldwell's office (Mark and George were also working late), I told him, "The bathroom lights won't turn on." He said, "Yeah. The bathroom lights don't turn on after midnight." I asked, "How do you go to the bathroom with the lights off?" He answered, "Usually I just feel my way to the urinal."
"I need to take a crap."
"Hey, I wouldn't know anything about that. Get the flashlight from George."
"I need a flashlight?"
"Yeah."
So, I walked to George's office.
"I need the bathroom flashlight."
Giggling to himself under his breath, George reached into his desk and gave me a pocket flashlight. With flashlight in hand I returned to the bathroom where everything went according to plan.
I know game production has its odd moments, but... this one was really odd.
01/18/99
In the last days of a game's production, the game designer makes a desperate attempt to prevent features from being cut to make the deadline. However, if I got all the features I wanted, the game would never ship. Thus, there is always a tug of war between the game designer, management, programmers, and artists, to decide what gets into the game and what gets pushed back to the expansion or sequel.
Today I was doing my best to get a new hero into the game without too much additional programming or art. I realized I could get the results I needed by simply adding a new graphic and customizing an existing game hero. Even better, I could get the graphic from existing art in the intro movie. All the artist had to do was crop a freeze-frame from the movie and give it to our asset manager to be put into the game. I could customize the hero in the editor. All the programmers had to do was recognize the character's unique identification.
Well, we did.
I wonder how much longer I can push my luck.
01/19/99
I have become the Walmart floor manager.
No. I haven't quit my job.
Let me explain.
At this stage in the making of the game, I find myself spending most of my time walking the halls with my Notepad of Oppression waiting for people to call out my name.
The notepad is a list of issues needing resolution. Most people find the notepad humorous unless their name is on it. Ironically, I end up putting my name on the notepad more than anyone else's (I'm oppressing myself).
Regardless, when I am walking the halls and someone calls out my name, I duck into their office to answer their questions. Sometimes this means getting on their phone and calling someone else to clear up an issue. If I don't have the answer, I'm the intermediary.
Thus, I feel like the Walmart floor manager, roaming the isles, taking care of arising issues. All I really need is the blue vest.
01/20/99
For a moment, consider most game manuals. Usually, a manual details the game interface and introduces you to the various game elements. Rarely do these manuals give you true game statistics.
For Heroes III , we wanted to buck this trend. Using the Heroes II strategy guide as a model, we decided to make a big manual loaded with information. This is exactly what we did - 144 pages.
Today we signed off on the manual. Well, no sooner did the ink dry than we discovered some errors. It was terrifying. I literally sat at my desk, looking at the errors I had discovered, and heard the manual mocking me with the chittering of a wild hyena.
There was nothing I could do. It was carved in stone. Now understand, most manuals ship with some errors. This is what the Readme is for. However, several people had gone over this manual time and again, and still there were errors.
I'll never make a big manual again. It's too much upkeep considering the fluidity of game design.
I'm sure I'll lose some sleep over this.
1/25/99
Today the Coke machine caught fire.
Let me repeat this.
Today the Coke machine caught fire.
Since we started crunching, around 7:00pm each night, Mark Caldwell (NWC VP) has been unlocking the Coke machine for free drinks to go with our evening meal. We don't continue pressing the selection buttons for the various drinks. Instead, we literally open up the front half of this big, red, half-ton refrigerator, made to withstand the assaults of the most juvenile of delinquents.
Now, I'm not exactly clear on the details, but one of the testers pulled open the front door to grab a soda from inside. Apparently, some of the electrical wires were sheared, followed by fire and smoke.
Upon seeing the fire and smelling the smoke, the tester grabbed Ben Bent (NWC office manager and part-time game director). He then pointed out the fire in the Coke machine.
With perfect calm, Ben simply unplugged the Coke machine. Poof. The fire went away.
I must admit, I can't help but see the fire in the Coke machine as a metaphor for Heroes III in production. A fire starts, someone panics, and someone else calmly solves the problem.
Truthfully, it's the story of the game production process.
2/07/99 Sunday
Today could be the day.
We've decided to make a "final candidate" CD-ROM for 3DO approval. A final candidate is what we consider "ready to ship." We then send the final candidate to 3DO for them to do shrink-wrap testing.
Tonight, no one leaves the building until the game is finished.
2/08/99 Monday
It's 5:00am Monday morning.
We just started burning the final candidate.
About half the team is still here.
We've been crunching too long. Everyone's burnt.
About 15 minutes ago, Mark starting broadcasting Money For Nothing over everyone's speakerphone.
Ironic.
02/13/99
I am literally weak-kneed. Except for writing this entry, all I intend to do is just sit in my office chair and do everything I possibly can to do nothing.
As of 8:30 Saturday, February 13, we're calling it good Barring last-second crash bugs, the game is done.
It's 9:30, and with the realization the game is done, already I'm beginning to crash.
After crunching for so long, the crash is the aftereffect. This is the time when you finally realize you can relax and return to a somewhat normal life. This is also the flag signaling the release of all the pent-up stress and illness you've been holding off by sheer will for the past six months. Thus... crash.
Wow.
We're done.
02/14/99
Four days after announcing Heroes has gone gold, we're already talking about the expansion pack. Already, I've assembled my map makers. They're good people. With H3 under their belts they should make even better maps for the expansion.
The downside? Chris Vanover is moving onto a different project. Technically Chris was H3's assistant director, but I adopted him as my assistant designer. He was a big help in many of the grunt areas. I was hoping to hand the expansion off to Chris so I could concentrate on the next Heroes.
No such luck.
Ultimately, this means vacation must wait.
(whimper)
Where is a monkey boy when you need one?
02/19/99
David Mullich's (Heroes III director) wife was pregnant and expecting about the same time as E3 last year (Atlanta '98). So, he couldn't go and demonstrate the game.
I was the next logical choice. I know the game better than anyone else, and when needed, I can turn on the charm.
Now don't get me wrong, when I have demoed the game, it has been a delight. Yet, as a game, Heroes III doesn't demo well. It's a turn-based game. It's not a first-person shooter or real-time strategy game. There's no real immediate reward for your attention span to latch onto.
However, Heroes does have a very large, very dedicated following. Thus, most people who want to see Heroes are already fans. This was the case at E3.
At E3 I did the vast majority of the presentations. I did so many I ended up losing my voice. Almost all the people who saw the game were fans of Heroes and liked what they saw. We were so successful, people were taking chairs from the other game stations to sit in front of ours.
Well, the downside to my work at E3 was... I became the demo guy. The downside of being the demo guy is traveling.
I hate traveling.
Once I arrive at my destination, there's no problem. I'm just impatient by nature. I'm also 6'1" and hate sitting in supercramped airline seats.
So, today I got to fly up to 3DO with Peter Ryu (MM7 producer), Keith Francart (MM7 director), and Jeff Blatner (new Heroes producer) to give presentations on MM7 and Heroes III to our Ubi Soft partners and a smattering of European journalists.
As much as I hated getting up at 5:30am and traveling to San Francisco (less than one week after going gold), the trip was amusing for a number of reasons.
Since I have been at New World, Peter Ryu has always worn shorts and sandals. For the presentation, Pete was ordered to wear pants and shoes. Throughout the day, he was wincing as the shoes rubbed his feet raw.
The other amusing part was hanging out with the French chicks from Ubi Soft and the European press.
Last time I was at 3DO I did an H3 presentation to a number of European journalists. Not a French woman among them. It was different this time, and dare I say, worth the trip.
02/22/99
David Mullich (H3 director), George Ruof (H3 programmer), and I are the only members of the team in the building today. Everyone else is on vacation.
Over the weekend I began my self-rehabilitation for returning to the real world.
When you do nothing but work 12-14 hours a day, seven days a week, and then it all comes to an abrupt halt, you suddenly find you have all this spare time on your hands.
Ultimately, you become bored. You don't know what to do with yourself because your "normal" situation meant working on the game... but the game is finished. Normal has become different and no longer normal.
A logical assumption for curing this boredom would be a vacation. Not yet. I've got to write the design for the expansion disc. I've got two weeks before it is due. After hammering out the specs, everyone will be briefed, then I can go on vacation.
I've got it all planned out. I haven't seen my parents since Christmas of 1997. So, I'm going to go back home and sit in the rocking chair in front of my dad's big-screen TV and watch nothing but cable television for at least two weeks. You heard me. Nothing but CNN Headline News for two weeks. If by then I'm not properly vegetated, I'll watch it for another week. Then I'll track down my old high school girlfriend and see if she's still single.
I've set up an e-mail address for your feedback about the game when it hits the shelves. This e-mail is merely for player feedback and suggestions. I will be the one reading the e-mails, and most likely, I won't be answering any of them. So, don't flame me if I don't respond. [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]).
I've enjoyed writing these diaries. I wish I had been able to dedicate more time to them.
My apologies to Elliott Chin (who made these diaries possible). Elliott wanted me to talk about the design philosophy behind H3. After practicing design philosophy 12-14 hours a day, I couldn't bring myself to write a diary about it. So, I thought I'd do "a day in the life." I hope you enjoyed my tongue-in-cheek account.
I leave you with the following words I once heard the great Jon Van Caneghem speak, "When it's all over you'll forget how hard it was and do it all over again."
He's right. We will.

Couldn't agree with you more. I've been there, and it's not fun looking in the back of couch cushions to try and scrape together enough money so you can at least eat a pack of instant noodles today, or be thrown out of your apartment because you don't have rent.
It really sucks, but this is the fundamental reason why companies like this are able to corner young and financially vulnerable people into a corner.
It's death by a thousand paper cuts, and I think we all can agree that the employeemployee level of trust is almost if not totally immolated in 2023.
I'm a hiring manager, and I always tell people to live by the FBI rule. Forever Be Interviewing. Have I had people leave because I haven't been able to leverage their skills to their full potential? Absolutely. Have I been in situations where I as the hiring manager have been told by the higher ups that we are not paying market rate and can't budge? More frequently than I would like.
Do I change what I tell people? Hell no.
The reason why I as a hiring manager can't pay more, is because the higher ups strategy has worked in the past. There is no positive feedback loop.
The reason why this is the right approach, is it avoids the chicken and the egg problem. You really need to have at least 6 months of living expenses tucked away. You can't do that if you're paid below a subsistence salary, or you're incapable of downscaling your bills. I.e. you have children, family member you have to support, illness in the USA, etc.
If you are interviewing constantly, and I'm talking at least one every 2 weeks, you'd be surprised at how *good* you get at interviewing. That's a head start already. You can high ball your salary, and not give a damn about whether they want to hire you or not. You have your current employer, at least until they find out you're interviewing. If they do find out, double down. Demand more. Accept the counter offer and see if how they value you changes. If it doesn't, FBI and *leave*. *Ruthlessly*.
I got given a brilliant piece of advice earlier in my career by the CEO of a recruitment company I worked for. "Always move diagonally. You will never promoted as fast."
I took his advice and left his company! This was over 20 years ago. I bumped into him last year. He was happy I took his advice. I reflected back, and realised how many times I used his recruitment company to fill roles in mine.
Which brings me on to why do I still do it. Because relationships survive organisations. People don't leave companies, they leave their managers. Which includes constraints put upon those managers. If you're open and transparent as to why, well, relationships survive organisations. I have called people I have worked with before, and been able to bring them into my current gig just on my name alone. It's no secret weapon, it's goodwill. Something that can't be measured, and thus is forgotten. Goodwill is a fancy name for trust, which is a fancy name for this guy's not an asshole. That's my motivation, and it's served me well.
"Oh, but as a manager you'll get fired for that!". Ummm... yes. And I have been. As I personally practice what I preach, I've always got the next gig lined up. So go ahead fire me. I won't sacrifice my values for your greed. You don't want to be working for an asshole. I don't want to be an asshole. If the company requires me to be an asshole, hire someone that is naturally an asshole.
On the flip side of financial vulnerability in 2023? There are plenty of jobs paying close to minimum wage. We certainly don't want to waste that opportunity to punch back and bloody some noses. If a few people leave, it's a blip on the radar that can be conveniently hidden in a spreadsheet of doom. If it's systemic, it hits shareholders. That's when people care.
And yes, the excuses are already showing. "Oh, people don't want to work." (For below poverty level wages). "Quiet quitting is in!" (Because duh, you get what you pay for.) "There is a skills shortage!" (Because only monkeys happily work for peanuts, and eventually monkeys get sick of peanuts.)
It's time for everyone to cut the crap and get down to brass tacks. You can't assume your employer is going to do the right thing by you. Empower yourself and don't get steamrolled by a group of assholes, because you're vulnerable.
Don't be loyal to your company. *DO* be loyal to your manager. *IF* your manager is loyal to you. More than likely, they'll drag you to their next gig, because you're trusted hands and a known quantity.
*DO* work hard, give your manager the benefit of the doubt.
*STOP* working hard and actively interview if your manager is not supporting you.
This is exactly what has been deliberately removed from our employment culture. Why? Because it sure maximizes shareholder profit. But it's like buying one of those gold rings from a cheap store. They've been hollowed out, and it's just a facade. Why does nothing work today? Because things have been cheapified, and crappified to this point of breaking.
Everyone needs to push back and start having the *capability* of saying no. Sometimes in not such a polite manner.

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This is the post that was removed. Mods said: "Rule 3: No moral judgement requests. Moral judgement requests are asking people to evaluate actions taken or actions you want to take, in the context of right, wrong, selfish, or not selfish etc."
TLDR: My estranged sister has enabled her narcissist husband to do and say some awful things to me and my family, including, but not limited to starting a competing business after hiring him to do work for me. Last night she texted me that she misses me. I am not sure if I even want to open a sliver of a door to allow either of them back in. Should I respond? And if so, what should I say?
My sister and I were very close growing up. Her husband has always been a narcissist which has been directed at me more than a few times over the years, but I have always been able to look past it because "that's just how he is," and I wanted to preserve the relationship with my sister and niece and nephews. He was also the person that introduced me to my husband, who considered my BIL to be his best friend. We moved to the same town as we got older, had the same group of friends. Hung out every weekend. Our kids were close.
I own my own business, and we are very good at what we do. We are industry experts in our field. Every man who has ever worked for me has tried unsuccessfully to undo this success since I started. At one point, I needed to bring someone in for a particular client, whom my BIL was familiar with, and he had worked with this group in the past doing something completely different. He was familiar with what we do, so I hired him as a contractor. I felt good about this because they were family. We paid him very well, albeit sometimes a bit slow in the beginning as he was a contractor and he would get paid when we got paid. We also hired a friend of his. Things were going well so we began to give them more work and they worked well as a team.
We have certain protocol that we have to follow in the course of our work of which they were very aware. One of our more troublesome clients always tried to circumvent this protocol, and I would repeatedly have to tell my BIL and his team not to listen to the client, we have to do it this way or we could lose our status as an approved service provider. Well they didn't listen, which triggered an investigation, and we almost lost our provider privileges which would have essentially ended my business just as it was starting to ramp up. Instead we had to redo the work we had performed to all of the clients that worked with this team free of charge.
Come to find out, they did this on purpose, and started a competing business doing the exact same thing we do, and their first client was the client who triggered the investigation. Then we started getting calls from our very loyal clients that he was calling and telling them that they were taking over our clients as we were about to lose our service provider privileges. I went online and checked there corporate status, and the corporation was started right before the investigation was triggered. Their kids were all listed as officers, their two oldest were actively working for them. One of their kids was delivering the services but using BIL's name (illegal), eventually 2 of their kids were working for the client that triggered the investigation, and the whole time my sister was completely silent on the whole thing.
This is my livelihood. Both my husband and I work for my company, so if my company lost it's provider privileges, I would have had no way to support my family. Upon discovery, I ceased contact with all of them completely because I needed to do spin control and save my company. Eventually, my sister moved out of state, and he went back and forth between that state and ours while he performed work under his new company that was in direct competition with ours. Surprise to nobody, his company did not do well as he expected, and my company only grew. Eventually he moved to the state my sister is in permanently, but before he left, he met up with my husband to give back some things of ours that he was holding hostage. My husband said something along the lines of "I hope we can still be friends," and he said to my husband "we were never friends." So all around they have really hurt me and my husband both personally and professionally. And top of all of this, our friend group knew what was going on, and supported/enabled him completely knowing what it would have done to my family, so I lost my entire group of friends too.
This wasn't even the only thing he has done. At one point I was helping at a business they started (long before I started mine), and my BIL accused me of embezzling. Eventually, right before my wedding, he said to my husband "oh I found the paperwork, and yeah she wasn't embezzling." This was his version of an apology, and he couldn't even say it to me, he had to say it to my husband. And again, my sister stood by and allowed him to treat me like that.
Today is my sister's birthday. Last night she sent me a text that says "I have been thinking of you lately...miss you." I do not know how to respond to this at all. Or even if I should respond. After everything that her family has put us through, and how my sister has enabled this man, I'm not sure if I miss her...I don't know what I feel. I definitely do not want to open any doors to allow him anywhere near me or my family. I don't know what to do. I am guessing one or two of their kids are preparing for a wedding. As much as I miss my niece and nephews, I would not go. I am afraid if given the opportunity, he will do more damage and my sister would let him.

I want to begin my vent by saying that prior to this job, I've worked at a few clothing retail stores for about 5 years. Obviously retail is not perfect, but I had a lot of fun times. I enjoy a lot of the work they do. But, retail will never pay enough, the hours are very inconsistent, and lastly i wasn't interested in managing a store. So I left.
I found my first office job as a Receptionist. The only caveat was that it was also a phone answering role. I work for an HOA management company. Now I didn't know what an HOA was (i'm Gen Z, live in an apartment with parents, very much broke in life) but I figured that HOAs must help people so maybe this would be a great role for me, as I've done customer service for 5 years.
Boy was I wrong. Oh my stars. So, in real life, I've very rarely dealt with mean people. Super rare. I'm not even sure how I managed to scrape by, but many people have been very pleasant towards me. If they were upset, they'd usually calm down after so helped them. I'm very passionate about doing my part and helping out, and i'm very empathetic. People see that, and they treat me decently for the most part. Occasionally I get taken advantage of, but that's besides the point.
Every single day, I end up crying because I've been yelled at, criticized, or berated by a homeowner on the phone. My management company has very little staff, literally one manager will have 10 HOAs they take care of. And one assistant. I (and 2 others) were hired to answer calls for basically all 50 HOAs that my company manages. Since there's little staff, everything is done slowly. Service requests take a long time before they're taken care of. Payments done through our online system will take 5 days to process, causing late fees. And then of course, every HOA has different rules and policies, and I'm supposed to somehow keep track of it all.
It's all so overwhelming. I hate it here. My boss looks at me like i'm pathetic. Because I can't handle being yelled at. Sure, it may not be personal, but I still have to sit here and take it!? I don't know how to turn my emotions off. I get so overwhelmed that I make many mistakes and i'm sure my coworkers are just sick of me. All of them handle calls just fine, I'm the only one with issues.
Is this how all office work is like? Is there even a chance for me to find an office job without a bachelors? That doesn't involve customer service?