First post on Reddit. I'm reaching out because I find myself in a challenging situation during my PhD journey and I could really use some advice. I apologize in advance for the long post, but I feel it's important to provide some context. For the past two years, I have been facing difficulties in my work environment that have taken a toll on my mental health. The isolation at work, combined with the overwhelming workload and lack of guidance, eventually led me into depression and burnout. I have sought help from a psychologist and psychiatrist to manage these challenges. I have tried expressing my struggles to Joe, my PI, but I always approached the topic cautiously due to fear of his wife Jane, who was a PostDoc in the lab. She has previously labeled me as "fragile" and "overreacting." I have witnessed her mocking other colleagues who experienced burnout and even heard her refer to a fellow doctoral student as autistic simply because the student lacked self-confidence. Additionally, I didn't want to speak up because Jane and Joe offered me their house to stay, which is only 20min away from the lab, while I was still living with my parents over an hour away. I felt indebted to them and hesitant to voice my concerns about the lack of supervision, insufficient lab records to continue their work, and unhelpful remarks. Colleagues from other teams within the lab have often pointed out that my situation is not normal. They emphasized that I shouldn't have been expected to be independent right from the start, let alone be alone in the lab. However, I had a hard time accepting their perspective, believing the problem was solely mine and that I should be able to handle everything. At a certain point, my mental state deteriorated to such an extent that Sven, my other PI and head of the team, organized a meeting with Joe and me. Despite having a lot on my mind, I didn't dare speak up because Jane was present. Sven reassured me that this situation wouldn't last. Indeed, last September, Joe returned to the lab, but Jane had to stay to finish her contract at another location. Another engineer, Achille, was also hired, making the lab feel less empty and lifting my spirits. However, having scientific discussions with Joe remained challenging, especially since Jane became pregnant and Joe was frequently absent. I confided in a friend from another team about my distress, and I suspect that the assistant director of the building overheard our conversation and relayed it to the unit director. The director confronted me in his office, stating that he had heard I wasn't doing well due to supervision issues. I reassured him that things had improved and solutions had been put in place (which is true, with the return of Joe and Sven, weekly meetings had resumed). I also mentioned that I had informed my team about my psychological fragility, and Joe was now more attentive to my well-being. However, the director's intervention made me reflect deeply and filled me with some fear. Following this, I shared my concerns with Achille, the new engineer. I expressed my guilt about tarnishing Joe's image and then he revealed many things about Joe's perception of me. Essentially, he suggested that my distress was not solely due to professional isolation but rather because of my long-distance relationship with my fiance. This triggered some connections in my mind. Joe would often say things like, "When things aren't going well in your personal life, it affects your work too," or "Yes, Intel is sad because his wife is far away," or "We would like to send OP to your place, as she is fiance's girlfriend" I started questioning whether I was seen as a second-year PhD student, or just my fiance's depressed girlfriend. I discussed this with Sven, who once again assured me that I was recruited for my skills and not just because the lab was empty. He also revealed that when Joe was separated from Jane during his postdoc in Canada, he called Sven in tears, unable to handle the emotional separation. Joe seems to assume that I am experiencing the same emotional struggle with my fiance. Sven advised me to forgive Joe, which I did. However, a week later, Joe completely ignored me over a salad incident. Tom, another colleague, returned from a mission and asked if we could have lunch together after a meeting. I called Joe to discuss my results, and he informed me that he would only be available at noon because he was at the doctor's with his wife and newborn. I mentioned that Tom would be disappointed as he wanted to have lunch outside with the team. Suddenly, Joe became upset and took it upon himself to say that we would meet at a Salad Bar, with his wife and child, waiting in the parking lot until 11:45 before settling down. I kindly reminded him that I didn't like that restaurant and suggested an alternative. He replied that I could make it up with dessert. Noon arrived, and Tom was still in the meeting. I informed Joe, and he told me to inform Tom that there was an emergency in the lab, which I felt was inappropriate. In the meantime, I bumped into Achille and shared the plan with him, jokingly mentioning that it's a shame since I don't like salad. He responded that he didn't like it either and called Joe to convey that message, even though I told him it wasn't necessary. Nevertheless, he called Joe and returned, informing me that Joe agreed to go somewhere else. Still no news from Tom. Ten minutes later, Jane called Achille and unleashed her anger, saying they were waiting in the car with their newborn, and I hadn't thought to inform Achille since it slipped my mind while I was working. Achille was confused, and Jane said it was no longer necessary for us to join them. Achille relayed the conversation, and I felt a bit lost. Tom came out of the meeting, and Achille shared all the details with him. Tom decided not to join Joe and Jane, so we followed suit. When we returned, I went to see if Joe had come back to apologize for the misunderstanding, but I caught him angrily scolding Achille. I got scared and discreetly left the scene. This was followed by three weeks of Joe giving me the cold shoulder, and I was afraid to approach him. Finally, I gathered the courage to apologize for the misunderstanding, but I faced an avalanche of reproaches. Joe was disappointed that I hadn't come to apologize earlier, and he compared me to a manipulative person. All of this over a salad misunderstanding. Once again, I'm at a loss as to how to resolve this situation. According to Joe, he remained "professional," but every time he approached me, he exuded frustration and criticism. I confided in Sven about everything, despite my reluctance to bother him once again. He reassured me that I had nothing to blame myself for and that there must be something else behind all of this. Sven had a conversation with Joe about the salad incident and my concerns regarding supervision. Joe didn't take it well and took two weeks of leave. Jane returned to work the following week and accused me of accusing Joe of "psychological harassment." All I wanted to convey was that I regretted not having received adequate supervision and apologize once again for the misunderstanding. I was lost about what to do next. It feels like a toxic environment, and I worry about the impact it's having on my mental health and overall well-being. I genuinely want to focus on my research and make progress in my PhD, but these personal challenges and the strained work environment are hindering my ability to do so. Have any of you faced similar situations or dealt with difficult work environments? How did you navigate through them? What steps did you take to address the issues and create a healthier and more supportive work environment? I'm interested in hearing suggestions on how to effectively communicate with my supervisor and address the challenges I'm facing. How can I express my concerns without fear of retribution or further worsening the situation?

It's great that we don't have to wait 6 weeks for GMs to become available, but now that pinnacle grind has been removed completely, why are GM's still behind a 3 week lockout?
I'm guessing its so people can increase their artefact level, but after you are at the pinnacle cap, you only need 5 artefact levels to maximize your effective power, which can be done incredibly quickly.
It feels so weird to have the hardest difficulty setting just vanish when a new season rolls around, when our power level largely stays the same now.

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Hear me out...
I was thinking about how annoying it can be on either side, no matter if you are a killer, survivor or play both. I'm not sure if this has been mentioned before as I've only played for 2 years and really only started playing a lot in this past rift.
What if there was a new game mode that all 5 players raced against a clock, 15-20min timer. No one died until the timer hits 0. The objective is still the same, 7 gens and get 5 done BUT no survivor can be sacrificed until the timer is up.
I feel that completely kills camping and tunneling for the game. If a killer is wasting time on a lone survivor then the other 3 are doing gens. Likewise if you have survivors just hiding in bushes every time they get a heartbeat it wastes their time to beat the timer.
Killers objective is to pressure for the full timer or get 4 hooks.
Survivors just have to get all gens done and open the doors before the timer is done. After the timer hits 0 then the entity can just kill all, or make them all exposed or moriable.
Seems to me like a really good idea that can be expanded a lot further but this just popped into my head and wanted to through it out there. Maybe since this can be survivor sided since the killer can't actually kill until a certain point make it to where all gens have to be completed to even it out.
Either way this could offer a lot better gameplay each match then having a team quit on first hook, getting face camped, having teammates with no awareness.
Killer can also feel better about breaking from chases to keep pressure on all gens, and with the added 2 more I think the time management of killers they could play a real strong game.
It also opens for the possibility for if the killer loses then we could get an entity scene where the killer taken by the entity for not completing the trial.
Just a thought that seems like a good premise that could drive old players back while also being appealing to new players.

I didn’t even know there was a term for knowing your dreaming but now I can’t wrap my head around how anybody even isn’t aware they are dreaming when they dream. I mean as far as I remember since I was 5 I knew that when I went to sleep in bed and I started a dream that it wasn’t real and I was still in my bed. I mean how do you not even know you’re dreaming when you literally laid down and went to sleep! I mean the first thing I do when I dream is think “welp I guess tonight I’m having a dream.” (Don’t always have dreams). How do you not know! I’m not trying to be condescending I’m just genuinely confused and can’t figure out how. I really would appreciate it if somebody could explain it. Also I saw some articles about lucid dreaming potentially have some negative effects and am now a little worried because I legit have never not known I was dreaming and been able to make decisions in my dreams. Should I be worried?

I know the title sounds bad. I've started a job where I just didn't vibe with the team and which I quickly left before. So I know the feeling of not fitting in and being uncomfortable.
But this guy joined the company more than 6 months ago. He's in his mid 20s with a degree in our industry. Yet he acts and works like an unexperienced 15-year old student who's doing their mandatory traineeship. I've trained him and provided him with lots of resources to use when I'm not there. After a while, I let him do the (simple office) job alone, but told him I'm always available for questions. Well he didn't ask questions, he just did stuff wrong. Even things I had shown him repeatedly, he had notes about or manuals on.
So the team had a crisis meeting with the boss and another person was picked to train him again. Basically starting from 0, although he was already there a couple months. The new "trainer" babied him through everything. Explaining every little step again and again with the patience of a saint.
After another 3 months, she kinda gave up and now everybody just lets him do his thing, correcting his mistakes when they blow up. He has not improved at all.
The issue is, he's just not learning. He grasped a few tasks quickly in the beginning and continues to do them well. Everything else he couldn't do and still can't, despite there being lots of templates and examples available. And quite frankly, for most tasks those aren't even needed if you use common sense. His memory is extremely bad (if you ask him about an email from 2h ago he won't know what you're talking about), he has no social skills whatsoever (he avoids talking to anyone and if he has to, he mumbles so badly you can't understand him). Never takes responsibility for anything. He seems extremely uncomfortable and intimidated BUT at the same time quite arrogant (he likes to demand all kinds of new stuff for his desk and alter processes when he doesn't even understand the original way of doing them, he's often late and just shrugs when cautioned, etc). When he does try to have smalltalk, he says weird stuff that makes me uncomfortable. When asked about why certain mistakes keep happening and how we could prevent them, he just mumbles "I don't know". The boss has had many feedback meetings with him but nothing changes.
I feel bad for him, because by now everybodys pretty much avoiding him and just waiting for someone new to get hired. He probably has some kind of disorder, but if that prevents him from doing the job then this isn't the right match. The only reason he hasn't gotten fired yet, is because we're badly understaffed and he does usually get the most tedious tasks of the job right.

In Angular doc, it says:

Preloading improves UX by loading parts of your application in the background. You can preload modules, standalone components or component data.

However, adding RouterModule.forRoot(routes, { preloadingStrategy: PreloadAllModules }) make my website freeze, clicks are not responsive.
GPT4 says:

The PreloadAllModules strategy loads all modules in the background after the initial application is loaded. This means that it sends requests to download all other modules right after the initial app is interactive. If your application is large with many routes and components, preloading all modules could tie up the network and JavaScript thread in the browser, potentially making your app unresponsive or "freezing" for a while, especially on slower networks or devices.
Remember that downloading involves not only network transfer but also JavaScript parsing and execution which can be CPU-intensive. If too many files are downloaded at once, the browser can become busy handling all of them and the user may experience a freeze or slowdown.
Here are a few potential solutions:
Custom Preloading Strategy: Rather than preloading all modules, consider creating a custom preloading strategy that preloads only certain modules that the user is likely to need soon. This can help balance the need for fast load times with the potential performance impact of preloading too many modules.
Optimize Your Bundles: Use code splitting, remove unused code, and optimize your application's bundles to reduce the amount of JavaScript that needs to be downloaded, parsed, and executed.
Progressive Loading: Consider a progressive loading strategy where you load the minimum needed for the app to be interactive, and then incrementally load the rest as the user navigates or when the browser is idle.
Optimize API calls: If your modules are making a lot of API calls during initialization, consider optimizing these to reduce the load on the browser.
Use a Loading Indicator: If there's still a noticeable delay, consider adding a loading indicator to let the user know that data is being loaded.
Remember, preloading strategies are about trade-offs between initial load performance and readiness for subsequent navigation. You'll have to decide based on your application's needs and your users' expectations and network conditions.

Hi everyone, long time lurker here. It's been a couple of years since I played pokemon platinum, so I decided to start a new game file, with the intent of revising my previous team, here it is:
Yanmega, Magnezone, Torterra, Gallade, Rhyperior, Giratina
First and foremost, I would like to give my considerations about these specific pokemons in my last playthrough:
•Yanmega, not one of the best pokemon out there, but still a decent one overall, especially in the sp.attack and speed department. Cool design and powerful ability, it's one of my most favourite bug type pokemon. The only thing that keeps me skeptical is the awful type combinations, extremely late move availability, like Bug buzz and Air slash. Also, Yanma has a very low encounter rate in the Great Marsh, along with a low catch rate and an annoying disposition to flee after a failed throw. The Great Marsh is annoying too, after a set amount of footsteps the game kicks you out of the facility, which adds insult to injury to say the least. Still, a cool pokemon nontheless even though the grind can be unbearable sometimes. •Gallade, another favorite of mine, sick design, above average stats and vast movepool to play around. Luckily there's a dawn stone not too far in the game. •Torterra/Infernape/Empoleon, your standard starter pokemon of your choice. •Rhyperior, very powerful all around, but this time I would rather use Mamoswine. Yes, Swinub is a very late encounter compared to Rhyhorn, but I want to give it a chance, ice types are very useful in this game. •Magnezone, yet another popular pokemon in platinum, but here's the issue: I like Electivire even more, but Electabuzz is available only before the 8th gym, which is unfortunate for me. But Electivire's excellent movepool makes it up for this inconvenience, which Magnezone lacks.
Now, I know that in this third version of Sinnoh the Regional Dex introduces so many other pokemons that I probably overlooked, that's why I will gladly read your opinions on this topic and if you have some suggestions make sure to leave them in the comments, I'm curious to see your thoughts and considerations. Anyways, thanks for your attention so far, I hope I dindt dragged this for too long, this is my first post on this subreddit. Thanks in advance to anyone who is reading this and I wish you all a pleaseant day.
(P.S. I'm not a native english speaker, so there might be some grammar mistakes, I apologize for the inconvenience.)

First and foremost, apologies for my broken English. That being said, let me add my 2 cent as someone who has been able to mask his depression for so long ass time... I mean it, you may not be fully saved, but I can give you a bit of hope.
Around the age of 27 simply realize that many of my failures aren't really worth the excessive effort, but neither enough to drop the towel.
I wanted to be a father, have a wonderful wife, an amazing job and probably have tons and tons of sex, turns out. I suck at all of that! (Yes, I pathetically admit I'm a freaking virgin at this age)
But soon enough I found that. I don't have it as bad as many others.
I'm not trying to convince you that your life, your lack of accomplished goals, or anything about it is perfect neither the best thing you can grip to stay alive. But you know what? Make yourself a favor and think about the following:
-any friend who somehow still has faith in your neither gave up on you -any hobby you still enjoy -any simple yet enjoyable thing as sleeping, eating, etc -any person that is still there for you somehow on your family -and simply and overall, anything else you realize you enjoyed way more as you grew up, hold to it.
I'm telling you this because over the course of my 13 to 20's where I hated myself. soon I realize that i had no reason to be as others wanted me to be.
Right now I have the mouth of a sailor, the attitude of a grandpa, I like to keep playing videogames. And realize imagination and a wank will be more decent than finding a wife that will prolly find an excuse to not fuck me certain nights (which is totally valid, btw) and kids will literally eat my wallet somehow indirectly/directly. Preventing me from getting videogames or at least cutting short the amount I buy at launch, the pizza I will consume, the things I wanna do, etc.
What I'm saying is simple... Keep living, find a new motivation and also find out if some of your current ones are still worth the time.
In my case I learned having tons and tons of money is not an answer to your happyness if the work is stressful. And that I never get tired of eating pizza for some reason during this year. Eventually, you'll find another reason to live, consider it like some kind of always something dumb will make you appreciate living is worth it I'm quite aware this method is not for everyone, but even if your passions are stupid as mine, well... They are ours at the end of the day, let's enjoy them till we find out last stop on this train called life
Sorry if not the holy grail to recover your motivation, but .. it's something right? My current bearing is that I applied to potentially new job to drop and I wanna be diamond on Street fighter 6. Still gonna try that, also because dying sucks and I'm sure it hurts and will make me complain like a bitch, so no thx lol
Have a great night, keeping hitting the walk til you cannot anymore. I wanted to give up at the age of 15 and we'll, here I am... Don't ask me how I keep wondering the same for the past 15 years

I just put in an offer on my dream house, and it is well below the mortgage price I was approved for. We found a fixer upper in Michigan, old 1910 brick foundation house for 115K. My SO is a professional handyman and we are preparing to put some major work into this place. The roof and boiler appear to be in decent shape, and the interior is livable for now. My hope is we can work on it slowly while we live in it. But here's the kicker. The foundation is sketching me out. I don't trust home inspectors, and I've heard foundation repairs (if it's a full replacement that's needed) can cost upwards of 75K. Am I too poor to buy a house if I can't afford this repair right away? How do normal not rich people buy houses knowing this is a possible risk?
Here's why the foundation is so sketchy. There's OSB covering the majority of the walls in the basement. Dunno if it's because they were attempting to semi finish it, or hide something, but we'll never know for sure because it's a probate listing (inherited property, seller disclosure list is blank.) We asked to have it removed for inspection and the probate overseer said he doesn't have the authority and we can't touch it. There is some visible water damage on the bottom 3" of the OSB. But there is some water damage throughout the house from either a roof leak that has since been fixed, or maybe a burst pipe at some point. The brickwork that is visible looks like it needs the mortar replaced, we are capable of doing the tuck pointing ourselves. The inspector goes through in 2 days, and they've assured me that they inspect finished basements all the time, and there are ways of assessing the foundation other than just looking at the basement walls.
But if they're wrong, and there is a major foundation issue we find after we buy, what do I do? The inspector is certainly not liable, at best we might get our $400 back. How do people ever afford to cover these issues? And how much time do you usually have to fix them before the whole house is ruined??
Some fincals if that's relevant: I have a $46K in savings, SO has $20k after down payment and closing costs. We're hoping not to deplete these too much right away. I have a reliable job that pays well (80K gross). House will be in my name and I can cover mortgage myself and work while SO fixes up house. Due to the location we also qualify for a 25K 0% interest 10 year home improvement loan after we live there for 6 months.
Any advice or shared experiences would be much appreciated.

I'm pretty green in this area, happy to receive any and all perspectives.
I have a little under £350k from savings and a parent dying before they ought to have.
I want to buy a house in the next year or so. Would you recommend spending the money I have and not having to apply for a mortgage, or buying as much as I can afford and taking on a mortgage. My salary isn't amazing (£33k) so I'm guessing I could get £120k mortgage, perhaps at a better rate due to high deposit? (That's just what I've heard, not sure how true that is).
I don't need a huge house. I'm recently single, not planning on being single forever but no plans for kids (already mid 30s) so a small 2 or 3 bed house would suit me fine (though the difference in niceness of property/area is pretty noticeable where I'm looking).
Definitely leaning towards no mortgage because am not amazing with monet, but I've seen a lot of people saying to buy what you can afford.
That's about it, thanks for reading.

Hello dear community,
I am going to loose my job as a full time employee (worked for more than 12 months as a full time). I am also on top of full time work doing very little work under kleinunternehumung.
When I'm gonna be unemployed, I will register for having access to Arbeitslosengeld.
To my current knowledge:
- I should have 67% (I'm a parent) of my income (with a cap at 2237euros) for 12months
- TK and pension should be covered by Arbeitslosengeld
As I am also registered as a "kleinunternehumung", I would like to know what will be the impact of this on the previous 2 points mentioned above:
- do I still keep 67% or 2237euros based on my salary as a full time employee or is it different on the basis the arbeitsamt consider I can make money on the side from kleinunternehumung?
- the pension is still paid by the Arbeitslosengeld but with kleinunternehumung I will need to cover my own TK insurance. Is this statement correct?
Another question: what happen if I do a little job (1 day of work) under kleinunternehumung while on Arbeitslosengeld? I've been told that I would have to mention it to finanzamt and they will deduct the equivalent of a day of Arbeitslosengeld money from the total at the end of the month.
Thank you very much for your help. This is not the most common case so I would like to know more about this particular situation

My previous 10 year relationship got toxic when my guy cheated on me with his college friend and classmate, they had an affair for 6-8 months and i got to know later on that the guy i had been with for more than 6 years and wanted to spend the rest of my life with actually slept with someone else and that too not just once .
Things started going downhill after that .
But the thing that just shocks me the most that I remember not wanting to have sex a lot of times but just did it anyways and sometimes during the ending years , I actually told him no several times and we did it anyway , we were almost always under the influence of weed and other drugs when we were together and I remember not enjoying the sex part , apparently sometimes i used sex to lure him back to me or sometimes just because we had been together for so long , in the end it kinda started to feel like forced (I don’t know if i wanna keep it in the rape category ) but i do remember saying no a lot of times and him wanting to have it anyway.
This was his thought that no woman can deny him sex and we had a lot of fights about it , it was bad .
Its almost 1 year to our breakup and those flashbacks still hurt me to my core , i keep blaming myself that why didn’t i stop him , why didn’t i take a stand for me , why didn’t i break up when i should have , and at this point i think it was abuse but I’m afraid to even name it that because i was a willing participant ,
I have lost the capacity to be intimate emotionally with anyone after we broke up , I’m just floating through life .
The point of sharing this is to know if someone else have felt the same way and how did you deal with it?

For context most of my friends are online as I struggle making friends at school/in the community as it’s a smallish town with not a lot of alternative people, and making friends at 17 while being goth and openly LGBTQ+ is extremely difficult.
I also struggle with anxiety and depression and need to take breaks from talking to people for my own mental health and last week my social battery completely drained and I took a little break from social media and posted that I would be gone for a week or two on my close friends story on Instagram (that they were all on) and sent them all a message saying I would be offline for a while.
Two days into my break I go to text one of my school friends about a school assignment and I see that one friend had spammed me on all social platforms (probably around 100 messages altogether) demanding me to answer him, I decide to send him a message just incase it was urgent but all he wanted was attention so I told him I was still on my mental health break and he replied with what I think was a rude message that said “you’re just ignoring me, I can clearly tell you’re still active on social media, I need to talk to you because of my bpd and you’re my favourite person” he also threatened self-harm if I didn’t talk to him.
I replied that I’m not his personal therapist and that I have feelings and things happening in my life as well and that I need to take breaks for my own mental health, which I think is a reasonable reply. He took it badly and said that I’m a shit friend and how I’m self entered and only care about myself, and I’m starting to believe him.
I decided to ask some of my other online friends and two of them took his side saying that it’s annoying when I take breaks and “ignore” them, however most said it’s fine and they understand needing to take breaks every now and then.
So AITA?
(Sorry for any spelling mistakes or if things don’t make sense)
I’m sorry if this doesn’t belong here (please remove it if it doesn’t belong here) but I’m a bit stumped on the situation

My previous 10 year relationship got toxic when my guy cheated on me with his college friend and classmate, they had an affair for 6-8 months and i got to know later on that the guy i had been with for more than 6 years and wanted to spend the rest of my life with actually slept with someone else and that too not just once .
Things started going downhill after that .
But the thing that just shocks me the most that I remember not wanting to have sex a lot of times but just did it anyways and sometimes during the ending years , I actually told him no several times and we did it anyway , we were almost always under the influence of weed and other drugs when we were together and I remember not enjoying the sex part , apparently sometimes i used sex to lure him back to me or sometimes just because we had been together for so long , in the end it kinda started to feel like forced (I don’t know if i wanna keep it in the rape category ) but i do remember saying no a lot of times and him wanting to have it anyway.
This was his thought that no woman can deny him sex and we had a lot of fights about it , it was bad .
Its almost 1 year to our breakup and those flashbacks still hurt me to my core , i keep blaming myself that why didn’t i stop him , why didn’t i take a stand for me , why didn’t i break up when i should have , and at this point i think it was abuse but I’m afraid to even name it that because i was a willing participant ,
I have lost the capacity to be intimate emotionally with anyone after we broke up , I’m just floating through life .
The point of sharing this is to know if someone else have felt the same way and how did you deal with it?

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This is going to be a bit of a rant more than anything else. I’m tired and frustrated and extremely stressed right now. I live in a small town so finding an apprenticeship was practically impossible, there’s only about 4 shops nearby and I’ve been to all of them. One shop had actually taken me on as an apprentice but then kicked me out once they found out I was queer. I’ve been to over 15 different shops in the nearest city which is an hour away, so let’s just say finding an apprenticeship hadn’t been going so great. I was never outright rejected as they all loved my art but it was still frustrating. I’m writing all that to say that I FINALLY got an apprenticeship about a month ago, and there’s good and bad aspects about it. My mentor seems to be a chill guy, he works alone in his shop and is going to basically let me have full reign of half of it once I start working, there’s a few things that are concerning but for the most part he seems ok. The frustrating thing is that I don’t feel as though I’m actually being taught anything. He gave me a cheap tattoo pen, told me to buy the rest of the supplies needed, and then sent me home with it. He’s basically having me teach myself and then taking all the credit for it. And here’s the part that really scares me, I’m only a month into my apprenticeship, I’m working with cheap supplies, I’ve never even seen anyone tattoo before, and yet he wants me to come in sometime this week to tattoo a client. And that’s not even the worst part imagine. I’m doing a massive realism piece of a lion on someone’s thigh. He’s setting me up to fail really. This is one of those make it or break it moments. The only reason I’m even considering doing this is because one, I don’t really have a choice if I want to keep my apprenticeship and two, if I do a good enough job I can start working for him and have an actual contract written up. Anyway if you’ve read this far, thank you. Sorry for the long rant