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2023.06.03 19:27 puffpuffwhat Creepy people by park bathrooms

I commented this to someone else's post but I'm making it its own post, this happened just yesterday
Yesterday I was sitting in a local park, a coworker of mine with some car experience here said she's seen certain people creeping by the women's room. I think I saw them yesterday. One guy was pacing around for almost 2 hours with an empty cup in his hand. My setup is not exactly discreet, I had driven over to park by the bathrooms for easy access and I just so happened to park right between where a guy was parked in his truck and the entrance to the ladies side. The guy in the truck was constantly looking in my direction, not sure if at me or the bathrooms, but the guy pacing around was not being discreet about regularly passing the women's room and peeking in. The older guy walking around approached my car where I had my legs out the drivers door for airflow, just hanging out passing time. Until you look me in the face and hear my voice I'm often times taken as female (I'm female to male trans, been injecting testosterone for 10 years now but i like my hair nice colors). He came up and kinda mumbled, all I got was 'it's a nice day' and 'just enjoying the park'. When I answered in a tone that said let me enjoy the park alone he left, and the truck drove away.
About an hour later I finally get up to use the restroom. I went in the stall, did my business, sat on my phone glad to be out of the sun for a minute, when i hear a guy walk in. And i don't know how to tell you I knew it was this older guy from his footsteps. I saw his shoes approach my stall and wait there, he tried pushing my stall open. He didn't say 'anybody there?', there were other stalls available we were the only ones there. He said 'you have this locked?'. I've ran from several houses due to sexual assault, this instantly had me on full guard.
I said 'there's another stall available '. He did not move. When I exited the stall he did not enter it, he slowly started shuffling his way towards me while I went to wash my hands. Keep in mind this is an hour after he tried to make conversation and then pretended to drive away, he was clearly watching and followed me into the bathroom.
Before he could get too close I said 'Buddy you are doing some of the weirdest behavior I've seen in a while' and he tried to say 'what' and come in closer like he couldn't hear me. I have a very calm and reserved nature. Until you put me in a situation like that.
I raised my voice and said again 'mothafucka you are doing. Some weird ass. Behavior. If you need help get it somewhere else or you're tryna get yourself hurt.' I'm very tiny in stature but if I flex just a bit my veins pop and it's obvious I'm on some steroids. Gave him a look to let him know he was about to fuck with the wrong psycho.
The old guy guy mumbled 'oh okay' and left, I wish I'd got his plates but I did get a pic of his van as he drove off. I have a suspicion he and the white truck were together, my coworker said she's seen people by that description hanging by the bathrooms in that park before.
I think I'm actually going to start waiting in that park away from my car but within view, and just wait for one of them to try to touch it, or touch me or any person in that park. People underestimate me for my smaller stature, I will gladly put myself in a situation where self defense is appropriate to get to teach a creep like that a lesson with my own hands.
submitted by puffpuffwhat to urbancarliving [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:26 andredecxs My brother in law fucked me in the pool

It was Sunday and, as always, there was a barbecue at my father-in-law's house, so my wife and I, beautiful by the way, left for the house of the father-in-law, Seu Antonio.
My brother-in-law Ricardo is also married, with Valeria, he has a daughter and I also have two daughters with his sister, the girls are almost the same age and so around four in the afternoon my father-in-law decides to do what his granddaughters want and takes all the women to the mall.
And then it all happened, Ricardo and I were left alone in the pool, then those games of trying to drown each other began, until he took me from my back to try to drown me and I felt the volume of that dick right in my ass, I loved it at the time, but I disguised it a little.

When we went to the shower, while he soaped up I watched his thick, thick (pink) and heavy cock swaying, with
his symmetrical and shaved balls.
As we were talking about everyday matters, he realized that I was watching and desiring his physical assets, that's when he gave me an uncontrollable boner and without saying a single word, I quickly invaded the shower space and fell on my mouth with great desire.

His dick went up quickly, he had a mouthful of thick cock, I took advantage of every inch of that shaft, which must have been eight inches, then he came in my mouth, that hot cum running down his chin.
After the shower we lay down on some chairs by the pool, and he took his dick out of his shorts and said ¨I WANT TO EAT YOU¨ and I replied ¨GET OUT¨ and jumped in the pool.
Ricardo, naked, jumped in the back, started thrusting his cock at me, I turned around, leaned on the pool ladder and he, with a very hard cock, started to stick it very slowly, until when I realized he was punching all that cock huge on me.

He ate me a lot, it looked like he was never going to come, delicious, I had never felt so horny, so he pulls me hard and letting out a groan, he explodes with lust and washes me with that shit, I felt it, hot, dripping from my ass.
So I dove in the pool and despair hit me, I looked at him and said ¨MY GOD, WHAT WE DID, THIS IS GOING TO SHIT, YOU CAN'T TALK, PLEASE¨.
He kissed me on the mouth and said ¨TAKE CARE, IT WAS THE BEST FUCK OF MY LIFE¨
At the end of the day we left, each to their homes and with our families.

On Monday, very early, it wasn't even eight o'clock, he sends me a WhatsApp with a photo of his hard cock, with the following written on it ¨I WAKE UP THINKING ABOUT YOU, MAKE AN EXCUSE THAT YOU WON'T HAVE LUNCH AT HOME, I'LL PAY FOR LUNCH AND THE MOTEL ¨
And of course I went to lunch with him, but I'll tell that story again.
submitted by andredecxs to bisexual [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:23 Bax7240 What car in your opinion has the best engine sound? Mine is the Sultan RS

What car in your opinion has the best engine sound? Mine is the Sultan RS submitted by Bax7240 to GTAV [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:20 SleazyAndEasy Sidewalk cafes shouldn't be on the sidewalk

With sidewalk cafes now being legislated into a permanent, permit-approved process were going to see a lot more of them as time goes on.
Under the new rules sidewalks must have a minimum 6 feet of clearance which may seem like a lot but in reality, especially in busy pedestian corridors makes for a crowded, artificial bottleneck.
It's a real shame that this program doesn't give restaurants a way to put their patios in a parking space, or an empty lot, but rather forces them to take away pedestian space. This philosophy just seems to be the status quo here in Chicago, where seemingly every urban planning subtly, and not so subtly orients itself around cars and car traffic.
Chicago has the bones to be the best pedestrian, bicycle, and public transit city in North America but can't get over it's obsession with accommodating cars.
submitted by SleazyAndEasy to CarFreeChicago [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:19 lumos_noxious Just had my first Costco hot dog.

I’m going to be honest. I had been putting it off because of all the hype. But the perfect opportunity struck today: I had not eaten yet and was getting pretty hungry, and after I checked out I noticed there was nobody in line at the food court kiosks.
I made my purchase and waited anxiously for about half a minute. I was handed my dog and cup. I grabbed a container of onions and filled my cup begrudgingly with diet pepsi. Could I have just turned down the cup because I know I don’t like any Pepsi products? Absolutely. Did I? No, because I paid for it and it’s part of the combo.
Cursed diet pepsi in hand, I headed over to the condiment station and loaded my dog with onions, relish, and mustard (I do not use ketchup, because I am classy). I looked at all the dads eating hot dogs alone at the food court tables and decided no, I would eat my dog on the go.
I ate my hot dog as I walked out to my car, the sunshine and 85F Michigan air bringing sweat to my brow. As I wheeled up to my vehicle and opened the trunk I thought, “is this the best hot dog I’ve ever had?” I finished it before unloading my goods into my trunk.
I now sit in the driver’s seat writing this post, wondering if anyone would judge me if I went back in for a second dog. The diet pepsi sweats in the cup holder, nearly forgotten.
submitted by lumos_noxious to Costco [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:19 acidmine Astonishing Mrs Highfield! Married at 15, up to 6 kids at 22. [1953]

Astonishing Mrs Highfield! Married at 15, up to 6 kids at 22. [1953] submitted by acidmine to OldSchoolRidiculous [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:16 bananbee Please read. How to make a change in my town

Gonna try and make this short and clear- I live in a pretty small town in California. Everyone knows everyone but we are most certainly growing. People keep moving here, which is great and fine but our town can’t handle it. Our area has the space but refuses to use it properly. Here are my issues - two nights ago, a girl I knew from highschool passed away in a car accident on one of our straight roads. somebody else died on the same road, in a car accident, the day before. We have had four fatal car accidents within like a mile of each other within about 36 hours. There’s several streets we have that are just DANGEROUS. High speeds straight through, not a care in the world for what color your light is. I’m tired of our community dying and getting hurt, I’m tired of mourning these people that should still be alive. Our town is very spread out. Very suburban, lots of nature but also lots of single story single business buildings, SO MANY houses for single families only, they keep building more, and yet no one can afford them. But they keep building more. They keep tearing down historic nature of our area to build more car washes, storage units, and houses. Our area is so cramped that even coming home at night on a Tuesday at 11:45pm you still get stuck in traffic. It is IMPOSSIBLE to live here without a car. Absolutely impossible. Lots of hills so biking is hard, and the drivers don’t give a fuck about the bike lanes or pedestrians. I know so many people that have gotten hit by a car or almost hit by a car ( including myself). How do I bring it to our city government and start pushing for a change. We need to make living here more sustainable and safe. Enough building more buildings and houses while most of everything else is empty. We don’t need them. These roads are dangerous. I can’t just sit back and watch anymore. It’s miserable here. How can I help make this change?
Edit- forgot to mention we don’t really have public transport. We have a bus that shows up sometimes and it only has like 3 stops. That’s our only public transportation.
submitted by bananbee to urbanplanning [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:16 AutismToTheLetter Getting kicked out from mental health services for non compliance, releasing the steam.

They kicked me out and I responded courteously saying "more time for self development!" "it was a burden" "thank you for allowing me to detach". I was trying to be positive, yet they still give mean sentiments :C: "we are not a friendship service"...
I have responsibility. Is it? If I have a psychotic episode in court, you are not responsible for my safety?
Came out of the medical practice, stopped on my bicycle at a nearby stop sign. Car behind me tooted the horn. I don't think it is the psychiatrist I just met. It could be one of those staff, reception probably.Seriously, If I went through the stop sign not allowing like a 5 second gap for cross traffic, it is not safe. You might think 3 seconds is safe. Well that is because you are in a car. If I go through the stop sign and I get hit, you are responsible, mr health care worker?
Have some empathy. I can only try my best on human pedal power. You pieces of unrelenting...
Mentally. Metaphorically. Physically. Pushing me to high levels of achievement and productivity to sacrifice inner peace and safety.
I don't think I'll ever go back to therapy... I could not develop much rapport with them. Except one: I was so anxious they the psychologist told me to breath deeply in and out, tense up certain muscles one at a time with focus. However, seeing that I have a lack of progress, begins to show lack of patience and disgruntlement.
It's about progress... usually. Is there anything wrong for the lack of progress. You progress with car development, but sacrifice the environment. We have to do it sustainably. Even then, its hard, when we only have 1 Earth and the population is growing. Oops, off the tangent! But nice link.
Sometimes, venting is some sort of assertive practice to stand up for rights. But even then, the forces are overwhelming, because I can be "dead" right in traffic being the minority road user. I got to pull over. Why engage in mental health services. Only if it is an emergency, will police be called. Otherwise!? there is no clear guideline. They can act whatever, it is a 2 way street. Talking in a room with confidentiality.
I can't believe I'm using traffic and knowledge of the streets as a metaphor. Yeah that is what I am only capable of comprehending...
Trying to use traffic understanding to veer me into logic and doing something economically viable... "Do you function well with clear rules and deadlines" Clear rules maybe. Deadlines No! Deadlines = Timelimits = Speeding = Crash and burnout.
Dam every traffic scenario I am sensitive.
submitted by AutismToTheLetter to Autism_Vent [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:15 Imaginary_Top_2795 I’m (25 F) having intrusive thoughts of leaving of my dream relationship with partner (28 M) because he doesn’t have an ideal family.

I got disowned/ abandoned recently and was only recently half ass “integrated” back when my mom threatened divorce because of how my dad treated me. Ever since, I’ve been feeling a huge hole in my life and want a family, not my own. I want to still be the “kid” lol. Long story short I wanted to buy a house with my own money and my dad threatened to take my car (he bought it for me when I was 17) if I bought the house because he didn’t like the location. I decided against buying the house because I was not in a position to lose a car so suddenly and also take on a house. But that put such a sour taste in my mouth I decided to say fuck it to all the cultural rules and live with my boyfriend (we always wanted to but I was worried about losing my relationship with my parents) since it was clear my dad will continually use fear & money to control my decisions.
I wanted to tell him as to not hide it but mom was terrified of the fallout so she told me not to tell. Eventually, she told him and I lost my car, lost family support, house keys, and it was emotional turmoil. She followed his lead out of fear and she has often enabled his bad behavior.
One year goes by and my mom files for divorce and tells my father the only way to avoid this is to “fix the family”. My partner and I let my mom stay in my house(yep, I bought one without having a car) to help her during this time. Soon after, he sends letters (written with mom’s help) about how he’s apologetic. It feels fake, inauthentic but at least ,after pulling teeth, I got my car back in my name.
I’m a chess piece he’s moving around to avoid divorce. Mom is eating up the half ass attempt and is no longer planning on divorcing and is moving out soon.
I’m yearning for a family but I don’t think I’m yearning badly enough to fall into that toxic fold. Although, it has crossed my mind just to have a semblance of family.
My boyfriend has been my rock and is my best friend. He is —almost— everything I want because he also does not have a tight family and he wants nothing to do with mine (understandably so). I feel like I want to throw up every-time I think of starting over and finding someone similar to him with a good family but I don’t know how I’m supposed to continue this lonely life with no support from elders or parents. I knew about his family situation but when we got together I had a put together family (at least on paper) so I didn’t think it would affect me the way it does.
In addition, my partner doesn’t believe in marriage which makes me feel even more distanced from the limited family support he has. I’m always going to be the girlfriend, never the wife.
I think I can find another partner with a better family dynamic. I don’t know if I’ll find a better match than what I have but I can’t keep getting envious of my friends’ perfect family dynamics with their own family and their partners’ families and wanting to be invited for family holidays and events. It’s eating at me. I want a proxy mom and dad honestly. And he can’t give me that. Another partner could.
Am I shallow awful person for having intrusive thoughts about breaking up with my dream life partner for things out of his control? Any advice for me?
submitted by Imaginary_Top_2795 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:15 subeam My mom thought raising me with "tough" love was the best move and now I'm dealing with the backfire in my adulthood

I'm pretty much no-contact with my mother and all of the things I wish I could say to her I'm choosing not to. Partly because I have no desire to reinitiate contact and partly because I know she'd just get defensive and angry and start the whole abusive cycle all over again. I want a mother in my life, but she seems determined not to change so I'm dealing with it by being no-contact.
When I think about my mom's actions and reasoning for raising me the way she did, it makes me so angry. She was my first (and only) bully. She always put me down. She would call me stupid, threaten to ship me off to my aunt all the way on the other side of the country-- even made me pack my clothes and bags as a scare tactic once or twice; she didn't care that I was an elementary school kid bawling my eyes out while packing my sneakers. As punishment, she would make me kneel on the ground with my hands straight up in the air for an hour or more. She wanted me to "feel how I feel every day at work while you're misbehaving." It took me until adulthood to realize that a good parent doesn't want a literal child to experience the harsh physical pain of an adult laborer. If my hands drooped or I started sitting because my knees hurt so much, I'd get in more trouble.
Other times I would be grounded for days at a time, but it wasn't the typical go-to-your-room grounding. I had to sit on a chair where she could see me. I had to sit there the whole day-- I wasn't allowed to go to my room or do anything else. Just had to sit there from morning to night and watch the rest of the family watch TV. I couldn't see the TV, of course, the chair was faced for the extra torture of watching them watch TV .
She constantly made fun of me for wearing jackets all the time. I just liked to keep my arms covered because I felt exposed and panicked when my arms were out. It didn't seem like such a big thing to be constantly ridiculed and mocked for. She nicknamed me FedEx specifically because "it's the weird kid from Cheaper by the Dozen, just like you." She also loved to tell me I chew food like a cow. She'd even do exaggerated facial expressions to show me what I looked like. I am still incredibly self-conscious eating in front of people I don't know well.
She did so much shit like the above, but that's not the worst part. The above I've mostly come to terms with and have worked through in my adulthood. The worst part was her "philosophy" of education. She was a typical immigrant mother who pushed education above all else. I wasn't allowed to get low grades-- and in her mind, anything less than a 90 was unacceptable. She would whip me with a belt for "bad" grades. She would chase me all over the house with the belt in her hand, screaming and cursing at me while I ran crying. An adult woman hunting down a young child.
One time, she whipped me so bad I had marks. And guess what? When we got to the parent-teacher conference, the teacher apologized for giving me an incorrect report card. The "C" that made my mom go berserk? Actually an "A". I was so relieved that at least the punishment would end; I never blamed the teacher because even back then I knew my mom's actions were not okay. That running around the house trying to catch your sobbing, terrified child so you could whip them with all your might was not normal. When we left the parent-teacher meeting and got back to the car, she didn't even turn to look at me in the backseat. She sat stiffly in the passenger seat, stared straight ahead, and just muttered an insincere "Sorry" through a clenched jaw. Exactly the kind of apology she would beat me and extend my groundings over (she had a whole methodology of how to "properly" apologize to her. If she deemed my apologies not sincere enough, I'd get in even more trouble and would later have to try again. I always felt like I was approaching some mighty king when I was summoned to her bedroom to deliver my apology.). Honestly, that parent-teacher conference still sticks in my memory because I was so stunned I got any apology at all. Fuck, my heart rate is going up and I'm getting anxious just remembering how I felt in the backseat of the car. I was just a 2nd grade kid-- I didn't deserve any of that.
My mother was, in general, a draconian "teacher". One of her "teaching" methods was to make me read books for hours, then I would be forced to stand in front of her while she flipped through the books and asked me specific questions. Mind you, she hadn't read the books so the kind of questions she would ask were very specific. I hated doing that shit. If I got any answers wrong I would have to go back and re-read the book until I could answer the questions. This could go all day depending on what I read. Her method of "correcting" me was to yell at me and get angry. This was her method for everything. Math, science, English, washing dishes, laundry, cleaning, talking, being. I was just constantly getting screamed at for every thing. Looking back, I know that kids need to be taught things-- as an adult now, I don't expect children to be dishwashing prodigies or cleaning gods. We get better over time, with practice, She never cared for that-- just wanted me to be good immediately.
As an adult, everything she "taught" me is backfiring on me and I'm holding the potato. I have so many issues surrounding failure because she spent 15 years of my life banging it into my skull that failure is terrible, failure is not an option, failure means you're stupid and bad and shouldn't be liked by anyone. I'm also dealing with the breakdown of her idea of discipline. She raised me to obey external authorities/drivers, not generate or indulge in my personal curiosity and motivations. What I learned from her I reinforced in school (never exploring things on my own, waiting for the instructor to hand out projects and prompts, only going as far as was asked of me, etc.) for k-12. That's a long time to build a bad habit. She always told me "I'm teaching you to be disciplined" but now as an adult I can clearly see she raised me to be an object waiting for someone else to put me in motion.
Yeah, that's actually exactly how I've felt for my entire childhood and into early adulthood. An object waiting for someone to put me in motion. And I hate that so much. I have no internal process or habit to accomplish what I want to. I start projects, meander, and then never get them done. I never went further than the surface level at school so, although I excelled, as an adult I feel like I don't know much. For a long time I didn't even know what I liked. I was just this husk of a person, this thin surface of a person, who just molded myself into whatever my mom wanted so I could escape trouble.
It's weird because I was also, in my own way, quite rebellious. Yet a lot of the ways I acted were defense mechanisms to save the important part of the thing I called my "self." It was like protecting a tiny flame from a terrible wind. When I could've been feeding the flame of my self into greater and greater expressions, I was instead spending all my time and energy keeping it alive, my small and flickering self.
Anyway, this got really long. I didn't realize I was keeping so much of this inside! I feel better having written it out. Even though I can't tell my mom any of this shit, at least I've told it somewhere. If you've made it this far, thank you, sincerely, for listening. I'm so proud of where I am today because I know where I came from and how much I've had to drag myself through the muck and the mire. I feel hopeful-- realizing all the above means I know the shape of the problem, right? Now that I know the shape, I can mold my issues into something more positive. I still have a lot of time to change my habits and find out what I like. Not too shabby for a kid whose only real question and goal for 15 years was "how the fuck do I survive my mom?"
submitted by subeam to offmychest [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:13 Sweaty_Tonight8567 I think I still love my ex despite being a year now

I (23M) think that I'm still in love with my ex even though I've found someone who treats me like I begged her to...
I feel like I'm drowning. I'm currently sitting in bed with my girlfriend as I type this because I have no one to turn to on this, for context I'm 23M, I was in a relationship with someone about a year ago who I genuinely thought I was going to marry.
She was so smart and pretty and had a great sense of humor. I loved her for her. We only spent 7 months together, but she made me feel like I actually had a family or someone I can turn to. Around the 7-month mark, near the end of that month we broke up. I had just moved to her same state because we were long distance for a few months, and I decided to take the leap because I trusted her and thought she would be there to catch me.
She had messaged me this last year in February when we were dating after a few months. I think it was around 4.
"I wish you were here. I don’t even need you to be awake I just need you physically near me. I keep thinking about the joke [friend] made and I’m not mad at her because she didn’t know and that’s totally okay but I haven’t been able to recover like I usually do. For the first time I was actually tempted. I wasn’t going to do it but. That was the first time after a joke that I was tempted. The last time that it actually crossed my mind was when [her ex] broke up with me and I was convinced that there was no more life for me and I could never be loved again. I had built a life for us in my head because he basically forced me to and when that life was cut off I didn’t think there would be a way to live. I never thought there would be a way to recover. Lo and behold I did but that’s the last time it actually crossed my mind. And then today I kept wondering what it would feel like and thinking of how free I would feel if I just didn’t exist anymore. I don’t know why im sending this message honestly because I don’t want anything to happen because I sent the message ya know. I don’t want anything to change in the slightest but I just. Idk I guess communicate feelings? Just say something so im not holding it in anymore? Say that I love you so much and I can’t wait to be able to hug and cuddle and kiss and cry while you comfort me."
This message me fall more for her, it was the first time someone had been so honest and loving towards me. I come from a broken household where I was abused emotionally and didn't allow me to express my feelings safely. This caused me to be unable to process really well what I was feeling, and it really damaged my ability to communicate my emotions. We had both just gotten out of bad relationships and when we first started talking, one of the questions I asked her was "what are you looking for in a relationship?" And she wanted something long term and so was I. I made sure to say that communication was something I really love and wanted, something that really made me feel safe. I didn't get that in my childhood. I got it in the form of screaming and fights so I'm not really scared of confrontation or disagreements, but I can handle them calmly because of it now.
She's neurodivergent and has some ticks and ADHD and other things that would make her a difficult partner, but I comforted her best I could. After she sent me that message, I flew out (against my controlling parents' wishes) to see her and spent 3 weeks with her. She was in college at the time and was finishing her degree and I had just changed career paths from nursing to computer science because I loved coding more. The thought of creating something in code really makes me happy. We both had similar goals and ideas and saw a future together.
Once she finished her degree she moved back home and about a month later we talked seriously and she had mentioned how if the relationship was to move forward, we need to find a way to close the distance. I had enough money saved to move and my family situation had gotten really abusive the more independent and defiant I got towards the abuse.
I decided to take the leap of faith. I moved to a state near hers, about 30- or 40-minute drive because we had talked, and she wanted to move there since it was close-ish to home. During my stay with her the first time, she had a break down and opened up to me about how she might be using me to cope, those were her words. I comforted her and said I wasn't going anywhere but if she ever felt like she didn't love me anymore or that the relationship wasn't good for her, she could leave, I explained that it would be okay because then she wouldn't be with someone she didn't love and how that would not be fair for her or me in that scenario. A few months later, I was very vulnerable with her and told her how my greatest fear was someone not loving me anymore and leaving me for someone better, months had passed by this point, I think 2 and I opened up about my abuse and even how a teacher took advantage me sexually when I was in first grade and another time in college when a roommate placed their genitals on my face while I slept and took a video and photos (as a prank).
I had never told anyone that. She comforted me and I loved her for it. I had spent a month in the new state before she decided to break up with me. I was honestly having trouble adjusting, it was truly the first time I was alone and supposed to adult with no guidance, no one taught me anything or how people can take advantage of you. I found a job that paid 200 a week (it was 9 to 5) and had a job at GameStop that paid decently well but I didn't know how to manage money, and this was a big stressor for both of us. When I first moved there, she wasn't there to pick me up from the airport because she was busy having just moved in with her parents and there were 3 other occasions she would be "too tired" to drive up to see me, I didn't have a car or license because my parents weren't keen on teaching me or letting me try to drive so I never learned. Anyway, we started having more disagreements, small things like how she spent more time with her friends and we didn't get to see each other as often even though we were closer. I saw her maybe once a week or every two weeks. She stopped wanting to fall asleep on call because she felt weird and I explained that it was fine, I just liked it because it was nice seeing at least her name on screen when I woke up. It gave me comfort during a difficult time.
I remember when she was still studying and she had gotten really depressed and suicidal, I was worried and stayed with her on call until she fell asleep, I guess I gotten used to it. Fastforward and its been a month with me in this new state and I had used my money on her because she had driven so long to see me and I wanted to spoil her and show her how much I appreciated it. We got groceries and we had a talk in the car about what was happening and if I was lying about my money troubles. I explained that I wasn't lying but she then asked me if I had ever lied about anything and I said yes, small things like saying I'm okay when she asked because I knew she would be worried or some poems and things I sent her that quite frankly I passed off as my own. I wanted to impress her, and I couldn't communicate very well what I felt before but the poems and things I found online did and felt that it would be more special to her if it was something "I made". I see how dishonest it was now and how it was one of the many things I did that tipped over my relationship.
Eventually, on one of the few days I had off from work. I asked if we could meet and hang out, we hadn't done it in a week or two and I really wanted to. I asked to meet at a McDonald's that was nearby, and she tells me she doesn't love me anymore and my heart sank. She had already packed my things in a bag, they weren't a lot and after sitting in silence for a moment, we went to the car to get it. I hugged her and I still remember the details. It was 2 weeks before my birthday and she broke up with me at 1:30pm. I remember glancing at my phone and looking around, like I was in a bad dream.
I know I had done some stuff to push her away, I was too clingy and probably asked for too much. I remember asking her if she could send me a check in text once and while because I always checked in to see how she was doing around 12:00 midday and then later at 7 to remind her to take her meds because she had some problems remembering it.
Looking back, it was a lot to ask and shouldn't have. I simply wanted to feel like she cared, and she was getting more and more distant. She did it for two days and I never got them again. I also remember telling her about my past and my abuse and acting like it really didn't bother me because I didn't want her to think of me as a victim or feel bad. I feel so lost. After she broke up with me, I got into a really bad headspace and the landlord kicked me out so I was homeless and spent that way for months, struggling to cope with losing her and the things I had done wrong. I know I wasn't perfect but I tried, her birthday was 4 days after mine and I sent her happy birthday and she never responded but saw it. I found out that 3 days after we broke up she was telling everyone that she had moved on. She's been one of those people who don't stay single for long and I was scared, I was working on getting better and doing better. To work on my mental health, my trauma and communication, my toxic behaviors and clinginess but she found someone, and I was alone. I eventually got back on my feet, got an apartment and decided to jump back on the horse about 7 months later after that. I met this wonderful, amazing girl. She treats me like I begged her to and communicates with me like I wished her would because my ex would shut down and not talk to me about how she was feeling, I gave her the spaced she asked for but I'm sure I let my anxiety get the better of me and invaded that space which probably didn't help her.
But the girl I'm with is amazing. She is what I begged for, and I'm lost and drowning because my ex is still on my mind. When I started dating again, I thought I was over her but today I got curious and looked her up and she had posted. She has a Twitch and watching her smile and play games really brought back memories of how we used to be and how much I miss her and love her still.
I feel like shit because here is this amazing, wonderful person, we just moved in together and I feel like I could never love her like I did my ex. She doesn't know a lot about my past or my fears or my insecurities because I feel like those negative things about me were that tipped over my previous relationship, and I want to do better. I feel horrible because I feel like I don't truly love her, with my ex I felt it and knew it, but I don't see that kind of love or future with my current girlfriend.
I wish I was over her, I wish I didn't feel anything towards her so I could move on truly and build a life with this woman because she really makes me feel safe and loved and I try really hard to do the same and it seems like I have because she's told me everything and has opened up to me about things she hasn't told anyone and trust me entirely. I'm just... lost. I don't know what to feel but I feel so horrible, and she deserves better but now I'm again in a position where I've moved for someone, and they truly love me, but I feel scared to give myself fully again like that.
I feel scared to hurt her like my ex did. That pain she doesn't need to feel because I can't get my emotional shit together and move on from someone who didn't bother checking in or wishing me happy birthday or even bother to call me.
I don't know what to do. How does one move on, it's been a year. I feel like I should.
submitted by Sweaty_Tonight8567 to BreakUps [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:12 astrolul Interested in training or fine-tuning a Stable Diffusion model, need some help?

Recently I've thought of training my own Stable Diffusion model on a few specific car models just to experiment but I'm not sure how many images in my dataset I will need for decent results, and I may need help captioning it all. I also wanna ask if it will be possible to train locally on my GTX 1660 Super with 6GB VRAM or will I have to use something external? Also I need to know what is the best way of training the model and what to use as I want to have good results.
submitted by astrolul to StableDiffusion [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:10 Effective-Eye-9928 What I Wish I Knew Before My Hair System

Preface: I am one of those people who spend way to much time obsessing and stressing over details, and will buy every product under the sun to get the “perfect result”; and it’s still a work in progress three months later…
I’m in my late late 30’s and took a job about 1,200 miles away from where I was last living. I’ve moved a lot, my work tends to have me move every few years so it’s nice to get a fresh start, but this time living in a major city, I was going to start all over with a new look.
First week in, I made an appointment with the best hair system place in the area, I figured it would sent me back $2,000 or more, so was shocked when it was a mere $500… then I found out why.
Most places that offer hair system treatments and service rely on you coming back every few weeks. They sell you not the best product (I was able to find the one I bought sells for $160), and it’s around $200-$300 per visit until it’s time for a new unit. You are in and out quickly, or waiting hours because they’re overbooked.
I went to three place, have tried eight hair systems and have every glue, tape and adhesive on the market under my sink.
So me, it changed my life. I wasn’t in bad shape but I was definitely overweight. In the last 15 weeks I’ve worked out, changed my diet and in much better shape. I have hair, and not just hair but a trendy man bun.
My life is split into equal parts of amazing and horribly annoying/frustrating.
The amazing part is, I’ve gotten with women that would normally brush me off, so much so, I’ve now found why so many guys are toxic to these girls because when you have the “complete package” it makes them want you more lol.
The annoying & frustrating side… I spend about 30-90 minutes a day screwing with my hair system. I’ve spent over $500 per month in supplies and about $1,000 at the salon (I’ll explain why), and not being a morning person, nor organized, and even a bit lazy; this is a CHALLENGE!!!
First to fit the roll of this new guy in town, I had to delete old social media pictures of myself where you could see my hair. Luckily being almost bald and extremely thin hair, I was always wearing a hat. Why? Because everyone checks your past! Not just women, guys too, especially the haters who will call you out anytime they get a chance and trust me, it will happen.
I’m always late, so now trying to fix my hair on top of it, makes things worse. I add an hour to whenever I need to leave because there is always something going on with this dang thing - I have psoriasis so my skin is oily and breaks down tape and glue.
I took a small thing of “eye lash glue” and emptied out the container, filled it with hair system adhesive and cram it into a Chapstick container I hollowed out. I was using an empty e-cig which was great for three weeks until I went to a club and they made me throw it out.
I’ve had to create a “fake drawer” in my bathroom to hide my supplies. Women talk, and they do a lot, so once one finds out word will spread. Which btw annoys me as almost everyone woman has extensions, wears makeup, and much more… double standards from a gender who are always claiming equality, but that’s my rant.
Here are some things I’ve found useful and advice:
Know your story - if you all the sudden have hair people will be shocked. If you’re going to reinvent yourself, make sure you have a good story and go back through pictures to make certain there’s no loopholes. Trust me, there’s a lot of envious people who get joy from ruining your life so this is crucial.
Find a good hair stylist - one tip, book a double appointment. Tell them you’ll pay for two spots, because their income depends on clients in and out. If you’re willing to pay, they will take their time. I’ve seen some really bad systems on people, it’s very noticeable
Befriend your stylist - it took me almost two months but I found someone I can trust. I’ve paid them very well and also go outside of town, just to ease any chance a mutual friend will come by or the stylist discusses my business
Spend the money - don’t buy something cheap, you’ll find out why really quick. Don’t be afraid to try a few different looks. Remember, you’re spending $200-$600 per hair system over $5,000 to $30,000 in transplant costs
Things to buy: Eyeliner pencil that’s the same color as your skin so you know where to apply the glue. Very sharp scissors. An “emergency kit” with glue, alcohol wipes, etc. Quality “glue” brushes that are cut at an angle. Stock up on glue and adhesive, it’s not expensive but have one month on hold. Lace cleaner, especially for the front. Mannequin head for cleaning and holding your piece. Quality adhesive remover. Good quality blow dryer with low to no heat option. Tangle free brushes. Combs with the metal ends to push down lace. Close up mirror, Mirror that has folding sides so you can see the sides and back of your head. Dye free headbands to use when sweating or sleeping. Silk/satin hair cover for sleeping. Silk pillow cases.
I’m sure there’s a few others, but hoping this helps someone. Yeah I know it’s a long post but I’m sitting at the terminal and bored.
Lastly, and most importantly - PLAN AHEAD!!
There’s to many stories of guys having their system fall off, it coming detached, to a s/o finding out. You can’t just toss this thing on your head and not change other aspects of your life.
I have a bunch of hats in various locations from my car, laptop bag, office, etc. I’ve even bought some while out because of weather conditions.
Don’t be afraid to say “no”. If you don’t like the way your stylist does your hair or the way it looks, speak up! Don’t try and mess with it yourself, pay the money and you’ll see results
submitted by Effective-Eye-9928 to HairSystem [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 19:02 Yeeting-around Another day of facing someone who had a new yet illogical and made up way to enforce homophobia

Another day of facing someone who had a new yet illogical and made up way to enforce homophobia submitted by Yeeting-around to LGBTindia [link] [comments]

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2023.06.03 19:02 nomtothenom What are the best hobby stores for die cast cars preferably in 1/18 scale?

What are the best hobby stores for die cast cars preferably in 1/18 scale?
Looking specifically for a 1969 AMC Javelin to repaint and turn into a memorial for my dad. Pic for reference (that’s my pops on the far left)
submitted by nomtothenom to londonontario [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 18:57 Otherwise-Scratch-19 Suggestion for my money move

Hi All,
So I'm at that age where I now plan to settle down. (marry my gf, buy a house). Here's my financial state. I make 50k gross. My gf makes 70k gross. I have around 3m in savings. Hers around 1m. Both employed. Both no debt.
Given this, how much should I 1. Budget for engagement ring 2. Budget for wedding 3. Budget for housing (Cavite area) 4. Budget for car 5. Keep as savings
And still be considered reasonable, practical and financially smart. And if you can suggest for a better move or sequence that you think is best if you are in that situation.
Thank you!
submitted by Otherwise-Scratch-19 to phinvest [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 18:54 bearbarb34 When/ how fast to pay off car

I’m in a very good financial position, I live at home (I pay 500$ for rent and pick up groceries etc) and have a very good job (I bring in 3k after tax) I’m saving 2k a month as well
The thing is, my beater car just died, and based on car prices I went with a new Toyota Camry. I paid my insurance up front with my income tax as well, so the only monthly payment I have is $550 (5%apr) on the car loan. This is the only debt I have
My goal/question is what would be the best way to approach this car loan, the goal is to buy a house somewhere in the next 5 years, but I have very little credit history. Would it be better to rapidly pay off the car loan, or let it ride for 2-3 years? I could easily pay double the min payment, and still save 1k a month, I just want to make the best moves for now
submitted by bearbarb34 to personalfinance [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 18:53 Edwinartofdriving Edwins Art of Driving: Your Trusted Partner for Finding Car Driving Schools Near You

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In this blog post, I will explore how Edwin- one of the top-notch car driving schools near me simplifies the process of finding a driving school, the advantages it offers, and why it is the go-to solution for learners.
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Trust and reputation play a significant role in selecting a car driving school. Edwin's platform includes verified user reviews that offer insights into the experiences of previous learners. These authentic reviews provide a valuable perspective on the quality of instruction, professionalism of instructors, and overall satisfaction with the driving school. By incorporating real user feedback, Edwin ensures transparency and helps learners make confident decisions based on the experiences of others.
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Edwins Art of Driving is your go-to partner when it comes to finding car driving schools near me. With its streamlined search process, comprehensive information, verified user reviews, personalized recommendations, and trusted network, Edwin simplifies the task of selecting the perfect driving school. Whether you're a first-time learner or looking to enhance your driving skills, Edwins platform offers the convenience and reliability you need to make an informed decision. Trust Edwin to be your companion in finding top drivers driving school and embark on a safe and successful driving journey.
submitted by Edwinartofdriving to u/Edwinartofdriving [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 18:52 seekaseeka1 Mazda CX-5 2017 Touring Help - Indicator Lights Randomly Turn On and Off

Hi all,
I hope this is an appropriate channel to ask this in.
I bought a used Mazda CX-5 2017 Touring about 2 years ago and have loved it, however in the last month or so I have been experiencing an issue with the DSC light, the SCBS light, the Brake System Warning Light, and sometimes the Low Washer Fluid light.
One day I turned on the car and these lights (minus the washer fluid light) came on all at once. They disappeared after about 5 minutes of driving. They did not come on for a few days after that. Then, seemingly at random, they came on again while in the middle of driving, and have begun to come on more frequently as the month has gone on. Now the wiper fluid light has joined the party, but again will randomly come on and off (I have checked and I have enough wiper fluid that I would expect the indicator light should not be coming on.) They will come on, sometimes stay on the entire duration of the drive, sometimes only come on halfway through the drive, sometimes come on when I start the car then go away sometime during the drive, sometimes all the mentioned lights will come on, sometimes only one or two of them, and sometimes they don't come on at all.
I have since moved halfway across the country from the used dealership I bought it from, and I do not live conveniently close to a Mazda dealership so have not yet taken it in to be looked at. I have not been in any accident or had any issues until this began to happen seemingly out of nowhere. My state inspection is up this month and I am concerned that this issue (that I have admittedly been putting off) will prevent me from passing if the lights happen to pop on on the drive ovewhen they are looking at it.
I suspect it may be some electrical issue, perhaps with the wiring (I am also experiencing the "Ghost Touch" on the dash monitor.) Does anyone know anything about this issue and what could be causing it? Or any general advice or thoughts about the best way to tackle this?
Thank you!
submitted by seekaseeka1 to mazda [link] [comments]

2023.06.03 18:49 hugizikush Tires suggestions

Hey guys I live in UAE where the temperatures hit up to 40-45 degree Celsius in the summer and in winter time it goes down till 15-21. I drive pretty decently usually but at times like racing and cutting corners on curves so need something with great grip. Need suggestions on the best tires I could buy for my car.
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