2013 ford escape body parts diagram
I made a Sonic Concept, part 1
2023.06.03 06:48 Ponyluve09 I made a Sonic Concept, part 1
So this game concept is Doctor Eggman's inside story, but the name has recently been changed to “Sonic Voyage” The story goes that Eggman has Shrunken Sonic and his friends down to peanut size and Swallowed all of them Sonic is trapped inside of Eggman’s body, all of his friends had escaped the stomach and are roaming around inside of Eggman, Sonic has to find all of his friends and escape Eggman’s insides Here are some facts
1: it serves as the debut of my ocs Spice the Fox, Seabreze the Fox and Nutmeg the Fox , they serve as playable characters and tag along with Sonic
2: The theme song is Salvaged by Nate Wants to battle
Part 2 comming soon
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2023.06.03 06:46 Gee_thoo Why am I "RESPONSIBLE" for Survivors fun? ( RANT )
Why am I held to a certain degree of fairness when I join a game, but survivors aren't? What about MY fun? You can t-bag, click, ds, dh, sb, bt, etc. and it fine. You have free reign to simply play the game anyway you choose, while I'm constantly obliged to adhere to the "survivor's rule book for killers"?
I constantly tell myself things like, "Hook and leave quick" or, "Oh, she's bad at hiding, and I found her three times in a row, just leave and be kind", "They DCed as soon as they saw i was playing a killer they didnt like? Fine, Ill let everyone escape" etc. etc. etc.
- If i were to slightly tunnel / proxy camp -> BAD
- If survivors gen rush -> "Just part of the game!"
- If I play a "boring/meta" killer -> BAD
- If i get 3 man body blocked + sabo / flashlight after every down -> "Just part of the game!"
I kill you within the first 4-6 hooks and im the bad guy? I play relaxed, its "gg ez"? I play seriously and im "sweaty"?
I realize that this results from a balance problem on the part of BHVR, but killers and survivors are on different sides, have distinct goals, and shouldn't care if the other side is having a good time. It has always struck me as odd because I play a lot of other PVP games, and in virtually NONE of them does the other team have to be concerned about your enjoyment in any manner.
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2023.06.03 06:43 stickybearmusic [SP]
This is the fourth in a four-part story.
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He started looking for depressions in the sand, large areas where the land would dip from roofs, windows, or doorways. He grabbed at different dips in the ground, but each handful felt as dense as anywhere else. He slid a few times down a sand dune, which helped him get closer to reaching his goal, but his efforts led to several dead ends. He knew he was getting closer though. He kept locating other objects – small hand mirrors, combs, baby bottles, men’s sneakers, collared shirts, broken couch legs. Everything indicated that there was plenty of foot traffic. He continued descending down different paths until he could feel the hot pavement underneath, the end of a descent that felt like the lowest level of an inferno. At that bottom level, he began to dig through walls of sand around him, careful not to trap himself too deep. Unfortunately, that proved difficult as winds would engulf his position and flood his mouth and clothes with more and more particles. He felt the weight of earth around him, so he needed to act quickly to find something to save his life.
This can’t be the end.
What are we going to do?
How will I get out? How will we get out?
As he made one last effort, his left hand scraped against something small and rectangular with different edges jutting from it. He grabbed onto it and pulled, but it was stuck in sand and string. He thrusted his right hand to help, and he could feel the entanglement, knots of string tied to different points on this object. He fiddled with the strings, but pulling the strings caused more sand to fall around him, which started to fill his shoes and pile around his ankles. He was not going to give up.
Yes, I got one of the strings off. The sand collected up to his knees.
I just need to tug on it a little harder. More sand fell, now piled halfway up his thighs.
I’ve almost got it.
Sand accumulated at his waist, filling his pockets, and holding half of his body in place. He ignored it. He had a feeling that whatever he was grabbing was to bring his salvation. He pulled harder and harder, and his fingers fiddled more and more until the object was finally free.
Finally!
It was a walkie talkie used by security guards, with one percent of its battery power. He did not have a lot of time. He pulled his arms to the height of his shoulders; the sand having absorbed most of his body with more winds pressing down from above. He twisted knobs trying to find a channel that still worked. The feeds were full of static, but he kept trying different combinations until he could hear anything. He kept lifting the radio higher as more sand shifted onto him, and he began to understand that he might not survive. Finally, as the sand piled around him, burying most of his body, he found one working channel. His success was moot. His mouth and nose were covered with no chance to escape. All that remained was to hear the last message, cold and robotic, before his breathing ceased and everything went dark.
“Hello. We’re contacting you about your car’s service warranty…”
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2023.06.03 06:09 Glittering-Candle394 Dream about a Kill Count for a fictional movie
I had a dream where I was watching a Kill Count video, and it is probably my weirdest dream/nightmare so far. Strap in, this is gonna be a long one.
It was a Kill Count for a fictional movie, hosted by James. I don't remember actually seeing James but I could hear his narration.
This movie apparently came out in the 2000s. It was shot in high contrast, so although there were mostly grey and dull colours throughout the whole movie, those colours appear brighter if that makes sense.
It starred a 20-year-old guy (let's call him Jake) and his female friend (let's call her Alice) going to a secluded island. I can't remember much about the leads except that they were white, Jake had a curly mop of hair and Alice's hair was straight (even greasy), raven black and reached her upper back. The both go to the island to take up jobs as caretakers for an exclusive park/research facility.
At the island, they meet the owner, a middle-aged woman called Gertrude, and Gertrude's mother, an ageing and slightly ditzy lady with crazy hair that's only ever referred to as Gran-gran. It's revealed that Alice lied to Jake, and that she actually came to the island to reconnect with her estranged mother, who is Gertrude. This makes sense since they both look quite similar. Although Jake is pissed, he calms down since he can still work a job as caretaker and receive food and board.
As Jake maintains the place, we see that vines and creepers have grown all over the place, and that there's large piles of broken glass littered around. We follow Jake's petrspective as he is stalked by an unseen beast.
The beast is eventually revealed to be a large, monstrous horse. James mentions that the CGI was phenomenal for the time, and the horse really did look threatening. It was at least twice a person's size. It's eyes were facing forward and seemed like large dark pits of nothingness. The mouth had sharp teeth and it was constantly slobbering some kind of black foam. It was white, but had dark patches all over it's body that looked like black mold. It was very fast, but had a limping gait, and made very loud and deep snarling sounds. Basically, imagine a huge zombie horse.
It chases Jake around for a while and he narrowly dodges by slipping in between gaps. Jake and Alice eventually realise that the monster hunts by sound (for some reason?) a la the creatures from A Quiet Place. They devise a trap to lock the beast in a huge cage (but where did the cage come from tho?).
The trap works momentarily, but the monster breaks loose. The monster kills Jake by brutally kicking him with its back hoof. The hoof actually goes THROUGH Jake's body. Like, we see the hoof puncture his torso and comes out the other end absolutely soaked in blood. James straight up says that this is the Golden Chainsaw kill since its the bloodiest kill in the whole movie.
Alice, Gertrude and Gran-gran then hunker down in the basement of their house while Jake is devoured. Now, Alice is the main character. She and Gertrude go into the underground tunnel system to find some way to escape, but James points out that doesn't make sense since they're on a landlocked island.
They find a hidden room which is full of strange experiments and bizarre writing. Gertrude plays a film projector (they're underground so no need to worry about noise). The film just shows a bunch of scientific drawings and surreal illustrations that make no sense, but for some reason, Alice goes ballistic. She starts screaming and pointing at the film and complaining that it doesn't make sense while gesturing to her book. Alice had been carrying a book around with her for the whole movie but we never saw what was inside it. Gertrude opens it and sees that it is full of nonsensical pseudo-science, proper cult like stuff. I remember there was a line in it that said 'too much oxygen gives you cancer' which made me laugh.
Alice has gone full psycho and is ranting and raving. She had shown some anti social behaviour and twisted values throughout the movie but now she looks fully unhinged. Gertrude deduces that Alice was part of some cult, and was not even her daughter, just impersonating her. We now follow Gertrude's perspective.
Gertrude steals the book and flees to above ground, with Alice chasing her. They reach the living room, but try to be quiet so they don't attract the monster. Gran-gran (who was resting in the living room) takes the book while they are struggling, but accidentally drops it on the floor, creating a 'thud' sound.
They're all quiet as they're scared the monster will find them. They eventually relax, but then there's a jumpscare as the monster crashes in through the nearby window and bites off Gran-grang's head. The monster is inexplicably larger, with red veins across it's skin and a more human-like face.
It destroys the house just by walking through it. Gertrude runs away, but Alice stays and raises her arms up towards the beast. She hugs it and actually assimilates into the monster. She passes into the beast as if she were phasing through a wall, but there are these grotesque sucking noises.
At this point, I woke up. I wish I could have seen the ending and gotten James' opinion on the flick.
How do you guys think this weird, non-existent movie would end?
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2023.06.03 06:05 Unlikely-Struggle-56 I HOPE THIS DOESNT "BREAK THE INTERNET" -WILDMAN-SAINT&SINNER PROMPT
WILD MAN: Saint or Sinner Posted on May 2, 2021by Dana Rehn The Representation of Wild Folk During the German Renaissance The wild man was inspired in part by pagan hybrid woodland creatures like the satyr, however, much of the mythology of the wild man stems from barbarians of Europe.[i] For much of the Middle Ages, they were considered the antithesis of the civilised Christian society. They were cannibalistic, sexually deviant predators whose many characteristics were related to monstrous races as well as the insane. Despite the wild folk’s outsider status and the antithesis of Christian morality, the wild man and woman nevertheless became an icon of German nationalism. The image of the wild man and woman became a pervasive figure throughout the German Renaissance, depicted on a vast range of media from stained glass, woolen tapestry, playing cards (fig. 3), and ordinary household objects. The wild man and woman transitioned from a demonic brute beast to a romanticised image of the noble savage. They recall a simpler time in German history and became a part of the image of a united and strong German people. They also posed as an affront to the court culture of Rome and became associated with the virtues of the natural wilderness. Cleric, Johann Geiler von Kaysersberg, associated them with the image of the hairy saints who found redemption in the wilderness by categorising them as a type of wild man in Die Emeis.[ii] The German forests that the Wild Man was thought to reside were starting to be romanticised. Geographer, Johannes Rauw, praised the ancient forests that had long been demonised by Italians as a place of barbarians.[iii] From rapists of damsels, wild men were depicted with the virtues of the nuclear family in the Garden of Eden before ‘The Fall’ (Genesis 3). In this way, the wild man and woman became increasingly mythologised, merged with ancient Germans, ascetic saints as well as Adam and Eve. Although there were a growing number of romanticised images of the wild man and woman during the sixteenth century, negative representations persisted. Their depiction was not a simple shift from demonic woodland creature to the image of holy saints; many possessed both contradictory notions of sinner and sainthood. The multifaceted representation of wild folk reflected many of the contradictions of German Renaissance society. Man or Animal The reputation of the wild man stems from antiquity. Aristotle believed that people who lived outside the civilising influence of the urban city lacked the ability to reason.[iv] In this way, they were considered closer to animal than man, subjected to their impulses.[v] The wild man and woman were also believed to lack speech, used primitive tools such as the club, and lived away from civilisation.[vi] Even the food that the wild folk would eat – berries and uncooked food – was a mark of uncivilisation and thus associated them more with animals than man.[vii] Many were also thought to crawl on all fours, which is illustrated by the often bare knees of wild men and women.[viii] The wild man as well as the woman were characterised for their violence and unhinged rage. They both shared a love of combat and have even been depicted jousting against one another.[ix] It is not just appearance, but also behaviour that made someone bestial like peasants who were described with animal qualities. The wild man has also been associated with bears and mythology exists with bears who were able to transform into wild men.[x] Their unbridled sexuality was also more associated with animals. Wild men were thought to abduct pretty maidens, while the wild woman would transform herself into a beautiful woman and attempt to seduce men with her true ugliness only to be revealed during intercourse.[xi] In this way, they were also associated with other pagan and hairy woodland hybrid creatures from antiquity including satyrs and centaurs, who were also known for their immoral behaviour and insatiable sexual appetite.[xii] Albrecht Dürer combined classical mythology with German folklore in the engraving of the Abduction of Proserpine on a Unicorn (1516) (Fig. 1). The print recounts the mythology of the abduction of the goddess of fertility by Pluto (Hades), God of the underworld – the pagan equivalent to the Devil.[xiii] In place of the classical god is a wild man on the back of a unicorn. Although this wild man is not covered in think body hair, he has wild hair on top of his head and a large bushy beard. He is identified as a wild man by his riding of a unicorn where the wild man was believed to be the only creature strong enough to overpower it by force.[xiv] Unicorns were originally regarded as ferocious beasts who used their horn as a weapon.[xv] Tales and visual art from the fourteenth century tell of wild men who become tamed by love after abducting a woman.[xvi] Yet this print illustrates man’s sexuality was thought to reduce them to a brute beast. Fig 1. Albrecht Dürer, Abduction of Proserpine on a Unicorn, 1516, Etching, 30.8 x 21.3cm, The Institute, Chicago. During the Middle Ages, many people concluded that wild man and woman were degenerative humans. They became an irrational beast in the same way that the insane were believed to be a form of wild people. Medieval romances frequently described people who suffered a crisis and lost their mind and ran into the forest living as semi-human wild people.[xvii] In Hartmann von Aue’s (c. 1160/70- c. 1210/20) Iwein, the protagonist who has broken a promise to his wife and is rejected, roams around in the forest until he is discovered by a lady who saves him from his insanity.[xviii] The wilderness in part created the state for wildness as it was away from civilisation and rationality.[xix] Like many monsters during the period, the wild man and woman were defined by their nudity. In this way, they were symbolically outside civilisation – both physically and behaviourally.[xx] Even those who have become temporary wild men through madness and fled into the forest shed their clothes and only returned to civilisation by again putting their garments back on. While in the forest they begin to grow hair all over their body to signify their move away from the human realm and into the animal one.[xxi] The wild man and woman encapsulated the fears of Europeans and what happens to one if they abandon civilisation.[xxii] The theme of civilising the wild man was popular during the Middle Ages. It was knowledge and acceptance of the one true faith that inevitably brought the wild man back to civilisation.[xxiii] In a thirteenth-century Bavarian epic poem, republished in the sixteenth-century German collection of stories, Das Heldenbuch mit synen figuren (‘The Book of Heroes’), recounts a wild woman called Raue Else (‘Rough Else’). The woman who was hairy all over and walked on all fours approached the knight, Wolfdietrich, who questioned if she was an animal. [xxiv] The wild woman demanded the love of the knight and upon his refusal turned him into a crazed wild man who crawled on all fours for half a year until God commanded her to disenchant him. In return, Wolfdietrich offered to marry the wild woman so long as she was baptised. She took him back to her kingdom at Troy and after bathing in the fountain of youth she was transformed into her former self, the beautiful princess, Sigeminne (‘Love’s victory’).[xxv] Wild Man as Noble Savage Although the wild man and woman were frequently represented in literature during the Middle Ages, they were rarely depicted in visual art until the fifteenth century.[xxvi] Therefore, their most ferocious reputation left little mark in visual culture. Instead, the wild man and woman were frequently represented in Renaissance art as the image of purity, with their family representing the virtues of parenthood and a companion or as a saint. Lynn Frier Kaufmann argues that the idea of chivalry and courtly love during the Middle Ages influenced the way wild men and women were depicted during the Renaissance.[xxvii] Larry Silver on the other hand interpreted their new role as cultural emblems brought by the rise in Germanic nationalism, which inspired the new translation of Tacitus’s Germania, describing wild people who only wore a cape of animal’s hide, as the first proud inhabitants of the Germanic lands (for example, fig. 2) .[xxviii] In this way, Tacitus’s Germania transformed the wild man into the romanticised version of the noble savage during the German Renaissance.[xxix] They lived a simple and virtuous life. They needed no written laws because they had good morals and rejected the habits of outsiders.[xxx] The nobility and urban elite began to romanticise the wild man for their strength and freedom from the rules of society.[xxxi] Conrad Celtis described a counterpart to early Germans in the Lapps. He described them as speechless but also that they had not been corrupted with luxury, fame, or wine. ‘Here no jurist twists the law, no doctor accumulates his blood money, and no tonsured man plagues the people’.[xxxii] Fig. 2. Nicolaes van Geelkerken after Clüver in Philipp Clüver, Germaniae antiquae libri tres, Leiden: Louis Elzevir, 1616, Engraving, London, The Wellcome Library. Source:
archive.org On a playing card by Master ES printed in c. 1461, a wild woman is depicted with a unicorn (fig. 3). While wild men overpower the unicorn with their bold ferocity, it was the wild woman’s sexual purity that allowed her to get close to the unicorn. A tale of the unicorn captured only by pure virgin maidens arose during the Middle Ages. This led to the unicorn being represented as a sign of purity and thus underscores the image of the wild woman as epitome of the noble savage.[xxxiii] A sense of innocence accompanies their ignorance of the civilized world. Playing cards usually consisted of four suits with illustrations of plants, animals, and heraldic symbols. The wild woman with the unicorn is one of four cards surviving in the animal suit by Master ES.[xxxiv] Richard Bernheimer suggests that the images on the cards represent a hierarchy.[xxxv] Therefore, it places the wild man and woman in the realm of animals.[xxxvi] This is plausible since this wild woman represents the Queen of the Animals. However, her clasping grip of the unicorn who is dwarfed by the wild woman shows her dominate position in nature. Fig. 3. Master ES, Wild Woman and Unicorn (Queen of Animals from the Small Playing) c. 1461, Engraving on Playing Card, 10.5 x 7.3cm (Sheet); 9.8 x
6.cm (Plate), New York, Metropolitan Museum of Art. The wild man also featured in more than 200 coat-of-arms across Europe, most of which were in German lands.[xxxvii] They were particularly popular during the second-half of the fifteenth century.[xxxviii] Interestingly, the wild man was illustrated beside coats-of-arms of popes and kings as their protector or guardian of the coat-of-arms despite the wild man’s history as a heretical being.[xxxix] Roundel prints of coat-of-arms were likely used as templates for goldsmiths or glassmakers who would fill in the family crest.[xl] It has also been suggested that these roundels were used by the middle class to emulate the coat-of-arms of the nobility. The templates were used as a substitute for commissioned coat-of-arms.[xli] In Wild Woman and Heraldic Shield, c. 1490 (fig. 4), a wild woman suckling her baby is reminiscent of the Madonna and child. This image reveals the redemption of women through childbirth for their responsibility for Original Sin (Genesis 3.16). She also serves as an emblem for fertility for the family whose shield she holds to ensure the family line. Fig. 4. Martin Schongauer, Wild Woman and Heraldic Shield, Colmar, c. 1490, Engraving, 7.7 diam. New York, The Metropolitan Museum of Art. Return to the Garden of Eden The image of the noble savage in turn influenced the idyllic images of the wild family. Master bxg’s Wild Folk Family (c. 1475) parallel Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve who were portrayed in animal skins after ‘The Fall’ are akin to the hairiness of the wild family.[xlii] In Master bxg’s print stands the tree of knowledge, overlooked by an owl in the background, symbolising potential danger as owls served as a symbol for evil.[xliii] A rabbit bounds towards a forest in the top left. Rabbits were used as a symbol for fertility and has been depicted in images of Adam and Eve during ‘The Fall’ and thus can symbolise carnal knowledge. The wild woman’s long hair symbolises her fertility and thus her unbridled sexuality and parallels with the depiction of Eve in the Garden of Eden with long, loose flowing hair.[xliv] Although the representation of the wild family references Original Sin, they are still in a state of nature and innocence and their ignorance of God therefore cannot constitute sin.[xlv] However, it also provides a mirror of the tensions between good and evil within German Renaissance society – between temptation and godliness.[xlvi] The wild family not only recall Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, but also the image of the Holy Family who were often represented against the backdrop of the wilderness.[xlvii] In a comparative print in Hans Leonhart Schäufelein’s, Wild Man and Wild Woman originally printed in c.1520 (fig.5), the wild family are still hairy and naked, although they wear fig leaves to help preserve their modesty. The fig leaves allude to after ‘The Fall’ in the Garden of Eden once they have eaten from the tree of knowledge and realise their nakedness and feel shame. In this way, the sins of the past are not completely forgotten. However, the image lies in opposite to the unbridled sexuality of the earlier idea of the wild man and woman. One son attempts to place a leash around a domesticated dog, which further symbolises a new domesticity to the wild family.[xlviii] Despite its clear reference to Original Sin, it illustrates an idyllic family scene, away from the corrupting influences of ‘civilised life’.[xlix] Fig. 5. After Hans Schäufelein, Klag der wilden Holtzleüt, uber die ugetrewen Welt, verse by Hans Sachs, printed by Hans Guldenmundt, Augsburg, 1560 Coloured woodcut, 20.2 x 24.2cm (sheet), 20.2 x 15.2 cm (borderline) The British Museum, London. This image was later copied with an addition of a poem written by Hans Sachs in 1530. In the poem the wild folk lament against the corruption and evils of society such as the lust for wealth, flesh, and violence. The wild folk in Sachs’ verse have chosen to discard worldly pleasures to live the simple and pure life in nature. The verse ends with the wild folk declaring that they will be happy to return to civilisation once the world ‘see the light’.[l] This verse parallels the wild man with ascetic monks whose wildness is a temporary state and who seek redemption away from civilisation. Wild Man as Saints The tales of saints who found redemption in the wilderness by discarding worldly pleasures, growing hair on their body and then returning to civilization and shedding their hair once more became co-opted with the image of wild men and women during the Renaissance. Many stories of anchorites parallel with others, to the point that they can become indistinguishable.[li] Onuphrius is one of the better-known ascetic saints who lived during the fourth century. Paying penance, he lived in a cave for sixty years, as wild men and women were thought to do. His clothes wore away and he grew a thick coat of hair to protect his body against the elements (fig. 6).[lii] Saint John Chrysostom similarly went into the wilderness to pay penance and vowed to crawl on all fours until he found favour with God.[liii] Ascetic saints were similarly depicted with bare knees as wild men and women were also believed to crawl on all fours like an animal, wearing away the hair. In Leben der Heiligen (1499), where Saint John Chrysostom is depicted as covered in thick hair and crawling on all fours in the forest is described as an ‘abominable animal,’ despite being depicted with a halo around his head.[liv] Ascetic saints were therefore reduced to a beast just as the wild men and women had traditionally been as they are seen as degenerating into an animal who grow hair on their body and ate raw food.[lv] In this way, the figure of the hairy monstrosity was able to find redemption, at least in part, cast as the model of repentance. Fig. 6. Anonymous, Saint Onuphrius, c. 1480-1500, woodcut, 14.6 x 11.4cm, New York, The Metropolitan Museum of Art. During the German Renaissance, Saint Mary Magdalene, who was regarded for her beauty,[lvi] was frequently represented covered in hair like a wild woman. Her hairy image found wide devotion through the southern Germanic region.[lvii] In a tale originating in the tenth century, Mary was set adrift by non-believers and by divine guidance found her way to the south of France where she preached and converted the locals. She lived in a cave in Saint-Baume, Provence, paying penance for her former sinful life.[lviii] The name Magdalene means manens rea or ‘remaining in guilt’.[lix] She grew hair all over her body in the same way as a wild woman. In her cave she remained silent and when a hermit approached her, she had trouble speaking after being secluded for so long, not unlike the wild man and woman.[lx] Every hour, angels would ascent her to the heavens where she would gain nourishment as she was so remote that there was no food or water.[lxi] Mary’s ascension into the heavens as a hairy wild woman was a theme in German Renaissance prints and is illustrated in a print by Hans Baldung Grien (c.1484-1545) in c.1512 (fig. 7 ).[lxii] Her ascent represents her body’s transcendence from both worldly pleasures and the wilderness. Fig. 7. Hans Baldung Grien, St Mary Magdalen, c.1512, Woodcut, Sheet: 13 × 8.7 cm Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York. The image and identity of Mary Magdalene during the Renaissance is believed to be conflated with the story of Saint Mary of Egypt who lived in the fifth century. Mary has long been thought to be a prostitute. She travelled to Jerusalem where she became aware of her sins when she could not enter a Church as she was held back by a spiritual ‘force’. She saw the image of the Virgin Mary staring back at her and realised why she could not enter. Mary of Egypt, the antithesis to the Virgin prayed to her for forgiveness and renounced her life of sin.[lxiii] Mary went to live alone in the desert to repent for forty-seven years.[lxiv] The desert was a place to be tested against sins, for punishment, but also for contemplation and redemption.[lxv] Both Mary of Egypt and Mary Magdalene have both similarly been depicted covered by hair that represents their place outside of civilization and discarding worldly possessions. It was also used to provide modesty to discern from their previous occupation of the flesh.[lxvi] As seen in the print by Lucas Cranach the Elder, The Ecstasy of St. Mary of Egypt (1506) (fig. 8) who was thought to levitate in prayer,[lxvii] is similar to the composition of prints of Mary Magdalene being accented by angels. The naked saints signified the return to nature before ‘The Fall’ in the Garden of Eden.[lxviii] Despite this earlier legend, Mary Magdalene was not depicted in art as covered in hair until the mid-fifteenth century but was rather naked with her long hair covering her modesty. The image of the hairy Mary Magdalene was therefore believed to originate in fifteenth-century Germany.[lxix] The detail of the hairy Mary Magdalene was also not included in the popular thirteenth century The Golden Legend by Jacobus de Voragine (c.1230-1298) that combined the tales of Magdalene. Her nudity was implied as the hermit who visited her passed her a garment to wear.[lxx] The hair covering Mary of Egypt was also a later addition to the story and also does not appear in The Golden Legend.[lxxi] She similarly does not seem to appear in art until the fifteenth-sixteenth centuries.[lxxii] The same can be said of other saints who turn into a wild man, at least temporarily such as Saint John Chrysostom.[lxxiii] This suggests ascetic saints who grew hair over their body was a contemporary idea that arose at the same time that the wild man and woman were popular in Renaissance prints. However, as Bartra notes, the idea of the hairy ascetic saint derived from Ancient Egypt when long haired hermits sought solitude in the desert.[lxxiv] Fig. 8. Lucas Cranach the Elder, The Ecstasy of St. Mary of Egypt, 1506 Woodcut, 24.4 × 14.2 cm, The Met, New York, Wild Man in Reformation Propaganda The image of the wild man was also co-opted into the Protestant Reformation in Germany and has been used by both Protestants and Catholics in contradictory ways. The engraving of The Pope as a Wild Man was created by Melchior Lorck (c.1526/7-1583) in 1545. This wild man with characteristic thick body hair with bare knees is a hybrid with long rat-like tail. Perched on top of his head is the three-tiered crown of the pope, but the last tier is a tower of excrement. Beneath his crown are ass ears, which represent folly and dishonesty. The ass’s ears allude to the myth of Apollo who made Midas grow the ears of a donkey to tag him for his dishonesty.[lxxv] On his back appears to be a bat with stretched out wings, which is a symbol for the Devil.[lxxvi] The wild man carries his characteristic wooden club, but this one has three cross branches at the end to represent the papal cross. He holds onto the papal key that is shattered at the end, which is a sign that the temporal powers of the papacy have been broken.[lxxvii] From his mouth pours a stream of toads and reptiles. This appears to reference the beast, the dragon, and the false prophet who release four foul spirits. A version of this image was discovered cast on a canon of Protestant troops captured during the Schmalkaldic War.[lxxviii] Melchior Lorck, The Pope as Wild Man, c. 1545, Etching, 22.9 × 19.4 cm, Staatliche Museen zu Berlin, Kupferstichkabinett Conclusion In Renaissance Germany, complexity existed in people’s relationship with the wilderness. It both conjured up images of the Garden of Eden before ‘The Fall’ as well as the dangers that may lurk beyond. The wild man and woman were just as complex and represented sinfulness, but also redemption and innocence. As Merry Wiesner-Hanks concludes ‘beast, saint, or hero? the wild man was all three’.[lxxix] A closer look at images of the wild man reveals their complexity. There was not a simple evolution between a demonised creature associated with cannibalism and rape to the holy saint. In the age of the apocalypse, the wild man and woman provide a reminder of Original Sin and the need for repentance at a time of social reform. In this way, the hairy woodland creature is not entirely absolved. Further Reading: Abulafia, David, The Discovery of Mankind: Atlantic Encounters in the Age of Columbus, New Haven: Yale University Press, 2008 Bartra, Roger, Wild Men in the Looking Glass: The Mythic Origins of European Otherness, trans. Carl T. Berrisford, Ann Arbor: The University of Michigan Press, 1994. Bernheimer, Richard, Wild Men in the Middle Ages: A Study in Art, Sentiment, and Demonology, Cambridge: Harvard University Press, 1952. Colin, Susi, ‘The Wild Man and the Indian in Early 16th Century Book Illustration,’ in Christian F. Feest (eds.), Indians and Europe: An Interdisciplinary Collection, Lincoln: University of Nebraska Press, 1999, pp. 5-37. Husband, Timothy, The Wild Man: Medieval Myth and Symbolism, exh. cat., New York: The Metropolitan Museum of Art, 1980. Kaufmann, Lynn Frier, The Nobel Savage: Satyrs and Satyr Families in Renaissance Art, Ann Arbor, Michigan: UMI Research Press, 1984. Moseley-Christian, Michelle, ‘From Page to Print: The Transformation of the “Wild Woman” in Early Modern Northern Engravings’, Word & Image: A Journal of Verbal/Visual Enquiry, vol. 27, no. 4, 2012, pp.429-442. Schama, Simon, Landscape and Memory, London: HarperCollins, 1995. Wiesner-Hanks, Merry, The Marvelous Hairy Girls: The Gonzales Sisters and their Worlds, New Haven: Yale University Press, 2009. [ii] Simon Schama, Landscape and Memory, London: HarperCollins, 1995, p. 97; Timothy Husband, The Wild Man: Medieval Myth and Symbolism, exh. cat., New York: The Metropolitan Museum of Art, 1980, p. 12. [i] Bartra, Roger, Wild Men in the Looking Glass: The Mythic Origins of European Otherness, trans. Carl T. Berrisford, Ann Arbor: The University of Michigan Press, 1994, p. 79. [iii] Schama, 1995, pp. 95-6. [iv] Bartra, 1994, p. 9. [v] Richard Bernheimer, Wild Men in the Middle Ages: A Study in Art, Sentiment, and Demonology, Cambridge: Harvard University Press, 1952, p. 11. [vi] Joyce E. Salisbury, The Beast Within: Animals in the Middle Ages, New York: Routledge, 1994, p. 151; David Abulafia, The Discovery of Mankind: Atlantic Encounters in the Age of Columbus, New Haven: Yale University Press, 2008, pp.16-7. [vii] Susi Colin, ‘The Wild Man and the Indian in Early 16th Century Book Illustration,’ in Christian F. Feest (eds.), Indians and Europe: An Interdisciplinary Collection, Lincoln: University of Nebraska Press, 1999, p.8. [viii] Abulafia, 2008, pp.16-7. [ix] Colin, 1999, p.6 [x] Bernheimer, 1952, pp.165, 59. [xi] Colin, 1999, p.8. [xii] Husband, 1980, p. 11. [xiii] Walter L. Strauss (ed.), The Complete Engravings, Etchings and Drypoints of Albrecht Dürer, Courier Dover, 2013, p. 178. [xiv] Bernheimer, 1952, p. 135. [xv] Anne Clark, Beasts and Bawdy, London: Dent, 1975, p. 46 [xvi] Lynn Frier Kaufmann, The Nobel Savage: Satyrs and Satyr Families in Renaissance Art, Ann Arbor, Michigan: UMI Research Press, 1984, p. 34. [xvii] Salisbury, 1994, p. 152. [xviii] Classen, Albrecht (ed.), Meeting the Foreign in the Middle Ages, New York: Routledge, 2002, p. xx. [xix] Colin, 1999, p. 9. [xx] Danielle Régnier-Bohler, ‘Imagining the Self’, in Georges Duby (ed.), A History of Private Life: vol. II Revelations of the Medieval World, trans. Arthur Goldhammer, Cambridge, Mass.: Harvard University Press, 1988, p. 368. [xxi] Régnier-Bohler, 1988, p. 369. [xxii] Colin, 1999, p. 9. [xxiii] Colin, 1999, p.6. [xxiv] Husband, 1980, p. 62; Merry Wiesner-Hanks, The Marvelous Hairy Girls: The Gonzales Sisters and their Worlds, New Haven: Yale University Press, 2009, p. 42. [xxv] Husband, 1980, p. 64; Bartra, 1994, p. 101; Bernheimer, 1970, p. 37. [xxvi] Gilmore-House in Husband, 1980, p. 139. [xxvii] Kaufmann, 1984, pp.32-4. [xxviii] Michelle Moseley-Christian, ‘From Page to Print: The Transformation of the “Wild Woman” in Early Modern Northern Engravings’, Word & Image: A Journal of Verbal/Visual Enquiry, vol. 27, no. 4, 2012, p. 431; Tacitus, Cornelius, Agricola and Germany, trans. Anthony Birley, Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1999, p. 46. [xxix] Schama, 1995, p. 96. [xxx] Caspar Hirschi, The Origins of Nationalism: An Alternative History from Ancient Rome to Early Modern Germany, Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 2011, p. 169. [xxxi] Colin, 1999, p. 23-4. [xxxii] Lewis W. Spitz, Conrad Celtis: The German Arch-Humanist, Cambridge: Harvard Universtiy Press, 1957, p. 100-101. [xxxiii] Anne Clark, 1975, p. 46. [xxxiv] Gilmore-House in Husband, 1980, p. 168. [xxxv] Gilmore-House in Husband, 1980, p. 167. [xxxvi] Gilmore-House in Husband, 1980, p. 168. [xxxvii] Wiesner-Hanks, 2009, p. 35. [xxxviii] Bernheimer, 1952, p. 180. [xxxix] Husband, 1980, p. 4. [xl] Wiesner-Hanks, 2009, p. 44. [xli] Husband, 1980, p. 187. [xlii] Moseley-Christian, 2012, p. 438. [xliii] George Ferguson, Signs & Symbols in Christian Art, Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1959, p. 22. [xliv] Christa Grössinger, Picturing Women in Late Medieval and Renaissance Art, Manchester: Manchester University Press, 1997, p. 82. [xlv] Husband, 1980, p. 15. [xlvi] Husband, 1980, p. 17. [xlvii] Kaufmann, 1984, pp. 36-7. [xlviii] Schama, 1995, pp. 97-8. [xlix] Colin, 1999, pp. 23-4. [l] Husband, 1980, p. 133. The full translation is found in Appendix B of Husband, 1980, pp. 202-4. [li] Husband, 1980, p. 97. [lii] Husband, 1980, p. 95. [liii] Husband, 1980, p. 102. [liv] Husband, 1980, p. 105. [lv] Bartra, 1994, pp. 83-4. [lvi] Roberta Milliken, Ambiguous Locks: An Iconology of Hair in Medieval Art and Literature, Jefferson, North Carolina: McFarland and Company, 2012, p. 189. [lvii] Wiesner-Hanks, 2009, p. 41. [lviii] Joana Antunes, ‘The Late-Medieval Mary Magdalene: Sacredness, Otherness, and Wildness’, in Peter Loewen and Robin Waugh (eds.), Mary Magdalene in Medieval Culture: Conflicted Roles, New York: Routledge, 2014, p. 117; Wiesner-Hanks, 2009, p. 38; Husband, 1980, p. 100. [lix] Husband, 1980, p. 100. [lx] Antunes, 2014, p. 118. [lxi] Milliken, 2012, p. 189. [lxii] Wiesner-Hanks, 2009, p. 38; Husband, 1980, p. 100; Milliken, 2012, p. 189. [lxiii] Michelle Erhardt and Amy Morris, ‘Introduction’ in Michelle Erhardt and Amy Morris (eds.), Mary Magdalene: Iconographic Studies from the Middle Ages to the Baroque, Leiden: Brill, 2012, p. 9; Else E. Friesen, ‘Saints as Helpers in Dying: The Hairy Holy Women Mary Magdalene, Mary of Egypt, and Wilgefortist in the Iconography of the Late Middle Ages,’ in E.E. DuBruck and B.I. Gusick, Death and Dying in the Middle Ages, New York: Peter Lang, 1999, pp. 240, 242; Milliken, 2012, p. 204. [lxiv] Erhardt and Morris, 2012, p. 9; Friesen, 1999, pp. 240, 242. [lxv] Bartra, 1994, pp.47-8. [lxvi] Erhardt and Morris, 2012, p. 9; Friesen, 1999, pp. 240, 242. [lxvii] Milliken, 2012, p. 206. [lxviii] Friesen, 1999, p. 242 [lxix] Husband, 1980, p. 100. [lxx] Jacobus de Voragine, The Golden Legend: Readings on the Saints (c.1260), ed. Eamon Duffy, Princeton: Princeton University Press, 2012, p. 381. [lxxi] Virginia Burrus, The Sex Lives of Saints: An Erotics of Ancient Hagiography, Philadelphia: University of Pennsylvania Press, 2011, p. 149. [lxxii] Voragine, 2012, p. 228; Milliken, 2012, p. 205. [lxxiii] Husband, 1980, p. 102. [lxxiv] Bartra, 1994, pp. 74-5. [lxxv] Hélène A. Guerber, The Myths of Greece and Rome, New York: Cosimo, Inc., 2007, p. 57. [lxxvi] Russell, 1986, p. 232. [lxxvii] Robert W. Scribner, For the Sake of Simple Folk: Popular Propaganda for the German Reformation, Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 1981, pp. 135, 80 [lxxviii] Scribner, 1981, pp. 163, 164. [lxxix] Wiesner-Hanks, 2009, p. 35. Share this: Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pocket (Opens in new window) Related Wild Men and Heraldry February 20, 2022 In "wild folk" Representations of Monsters in German Renaissance Prints September 5, 2021 In "cynocephali" Monstrous Women: Hair, Gender, and Sexuality in Early Modern German Prints June 6, 2021 In "Human-Animal Relations"
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2023.06.03 05:39 Akfanboy G.R.U: Temporal anomalies division chapter one
Yeshua volkov's POV.
"Well shit..."
I said as I checked if I still had some left over MRE's.
"Damnit! I knew we shouldn't have entered that anomaly!"
Said one of my comrades by the name of Ivan Pavlov. Some were already screaming for their babushka's like children when something isn't going their way. Although we had trained with mental fortitude we were in a quite a rough situation. We had no idea where we are or how can we get back to the motherland. Some were already panicking while some are getting counselling from the onsite phycologists.
"Don't worry comrades! We will find our way back! From this unknown reality we now live in! I know, I know. Some of you want to go back home immediately. But... ask yourselves this! We don't know how to come back but what if can find another way back! Back to the motherland! Maybe we can find something with great importance here and bring it back to the motherland. We will be treated as heroes, visionaries, and adventurers! If we ever go back to the homeland. Now get yourselves shit together and let's find a way to escape from this reality we found ourselves in!"
Said the charismatic leader Captain Alexander Mikhailov.
Some of my comrades stopped their screeching/screaming and started cheering. Some were stunned at how the captain was acting in this time. Honestly he was better than me with leading. He was like a charismatic leader that won the hearts of his soldiers while I the lieutenant just sat there doing the paperwork, doing logistics, making tactics, etc. Sure I am the lieutenant I shouldn't be doing that kind of stuff but we still need to plan logistics just encase of a fight to get reinforcements or supplies to the frontlines. He was more charismatic than me, and I let him do the speeches to boost morale. At least I'm not stuck giving endless speeches. I was the man that everyone counted on for tactics. I was one of the six tacticians in the detachment.
We checked the BTR 80's and a few transport trucks we brought with us and saw we had MRE's and water to last us over 50 days and ammo to last us over 70 days if we use it right. Suspiciously the BTR's fuel tanks were full. Huh? We drove over 6 kilometers with this thing and yet it's fuel tanks are full? Well lucky us I guess.
You must be asking yourselves how did we got into this mess in the first place?
Well that is what I'm going to tell you.
We are a part of a division of the G.R.U called the anomaly department. We study, and eliminate hostile or very dangerous temporal anomalies. We also develop teleportation technology but the tech is basically a barely functioning prototype that uses up so many energy that we typically need to drain 4 nuclear reactors or more to fire one up and teleport 500 people, 60 vehicles, etc they are so costly to use that we rarely use them, and need specialized equipment to use said prototype. These temporal anomalies are typically made from what's known as the god particles. They are basically particles that can bend reality itself or what the extremely dummies call magicules or magical particles because they seem magical to their eyes. We typically use those particles to create holes through space and time. We discovered our first anomaly back in the times when the USSR was still in its glory. In 1974. These anomalies typically bring with them destructive beings with them so we clean them up by killing them by either small arms fire, usage of military vehicles, missiles or even if it comes to it nukes, and burning their corpses. if we don't they usually turn into undead creatures that is very very hard to kill unless you have a tank, a flame thrower, or if you have liquid hydrogen to freeze these things up just to punch them and crumble into ice.
The first ones happened in Sarov or arzamas-16 one of the hidden cities in the USSR created by the KGB. The creatures that appeared on the first temporal anomaly were hulking abominations of green creatures filled with unknown viruses and diseases. We defeated them and later got an outbreak of one of the diseases, and later found a cure to the disease. Thus our predecessors the komitet vremennykh anomaliy or the committee of temporal anomalies created by the secretary general of the committee of state security with funding from the state to combat these threats. One day our unlucky asses got dragged into this assignment to investigate a temporal anomalies, and be one of the first to enter the temporal anomalies. We were greenlighted to do this mission due to our new naive, and unknowing overseers or as we call them the overseer council because they are a council of a few people dictating the fate of the motherland. And we followed those orders. And eventually got stuck in this hell hole inside some cave in the middle of who knows where. We were called detachment Alpha 3. The loyalists. We were the most loyal detachments of the overseers and we're trusted to keep the researchers safe. We didn't even thought that this would ever happen. We were naive to accept this.
Anyways we checked if everybody was okay. Some of the onsite medics and doctors who were with us in this expedition checked every one from diseases and found none.
We packed ourselves up and told everyone to ride in the transport vehicles to find a new place to build a temporary forward operating base.
Engines roared to life as the vehicles started.
"Now the true adventure begins. We will face hardships, losses, and so many adversities but know this comrades. We will survive and come back to the homeland! We will get through this together! We are the hope of the motherland! We will not fall!"
Said the captain.
We all hop in the transports and start moving.
We will comeback to the motherland. I sighed. That wish will never be true considering our jobs. I sighed again in resignation.
To be continued...
Author: Hello there reader. I am the author of this story. I will explain the timeline of the universe.
1974: The first temporal anomaly ever recorded
1975: The start of the Committee of temporal anomalies
1986: The Chernobyl anomaly
1989: The fall of the Berlin wall
1991: The fall of the Soviet union and the creation of the GRU
1992: The start of the G.R.U anomaly department
1992: The start of the overseer council
1993: Borris Yeltsin gets impeached
1994: The Election of president Nikita Parlov
2000: Prime minister of Russia Vladimir Putin gets charged with corruption charges, conspiracy against the state, and gets a life time in prison in a maximum security prison
2001: The election of president Igor Petrov
2006: The election of a dictator
2007: The second Russian civil war
2008: The battle of saint Petersburg
2008: The battle of Stalingrad
2009: The battle for moscow and the victors of the civil war are the democratic socialists.
2010: The start of the socialist democracy of Russia
2010: A new president is announced
2012: The Taliban does a terror attack in saint Petersburg killing 600 civilians.
2013: Russia joins the Afghanistan war in the American side.
2016: A new president is elected
2017: Russia becomes a part of NATO
2019: Russia nukes a large terrorist under complex city
2022: The expedition into an anomaly.
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2023.06.03 05:01 kitkatbananakat [Online] [Flexible] [LGBTQIA+ Friendly] [Duet PBP] [17+] Looking for a partner to do a Duet with!
Heya! I'm Teddy, an avid fan of TTRPGs for over the last 5 and a half years of playing them. I'm trying to develop my skills in running games, but I also have been wanting to be a player for quite a long time. With that in mind, I'm going to do a Duet Campaign to try and better my GM skills along with being a player in them.
If you're unfamiliar with what a Duet means, it is a game/roleplay format where there are only 2 players involved in the game/roleplay. In most games, this means it is 1 GM and 1 Player. However, other games employ the method of discarding the GM role altogether to make it so that both players that are a part of the Duet have the ability to dictate the story together.
The format for my Duet Campaigns always use the latter since I tend to try and use it as a means of helping other people be familiar with what it means to be a GM in a game/roleplay. Basically, it's an exchange of knowledge based on my experiences and yours!
The prompts listed below are going to be the games that I have a 'base story' that can be further developed, each separated by a different TTRPG. I hope one of them interests you!
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Big Eyes, Small Mouth 4e
The Skeleton Soiree [ Horror, Occult/Supernatural, Drama ]
It seems like not wanting to part with your friends have cursed all of you to be bound together in death, seemingly sped up by the fact that all of you have been transported to an abandoned school in the middle of nowhere. Ghosts of murder victims haunt the school, hoping to be pacified, but their vengeance clouds their judgement and targets anyone who dares to get close to them. Everyone suffers, and there appears to be no salvation in such a hellish landscape. Will there be an escape to this nightmare?
Memory Wielders [ Fantasy, Action, Slice-of-Life ]
After waking up with no memory of who you were, you and another person of the same age were taken in by a master who had deemed you worthy to be the successors of his lineage. Both of you were trained under him, but you two had ended up different. As you have grown older and his body grew weaker, you were finally given permission to travel to the Outer Worlds. However, will the truth of their master and their identity break the bonds they have formed with one another?
Monsterhearts 2e
Out of Candy Hearts [ Slice-of-Life, Romance, Urban Fantasy ]
Prom is coming next month, and it seems like you can't get a partner at all! Not that you're unpopular or anything, it might be because of the fact that you aren't that liked by people. Do you think you have what it takes to grab Purgatory High's coolest ghouls, and take them to Ghoul Prom? It might be a little hard, but I'm sure everything will be fine. They'll be an easy bag, you think! After all, it's not like you're competing with everyone for their love, right?
Thirsty Sword Lesbians
Shattered Shadows [ Supernatural, Drama, Romance ]
Years of living in a monastery without emotions would make you think that a person in such an environment would not need love, but your heart begged to differ. After encountering an individual from outside of the monastery, you finally felt your heart beat for the first time in your life. However, this wouldn't go unpunished as it awakened an ancient evil within, hunting you and your interest down in hopes of stopping whatever revelation you might get from this awakened feelings.
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I hope the three systems and six prompts I presented are cool enough to warrant players for them! If you are interested, then please fill out this form and send it to me through my private messages.
Name:
Age:
Pronouns:
Experience with TTRPGs:
Favorite TTRPG:
Interested System & Prompt:
That'll be all! 💕
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2023.06.03 04:57 nimmoisa000 Open world crime game idea Cartel: Palm City.
Developed by Hangar 13, DICE, Ripple Effect Studios, EA Gothenburg, and Criterion Games and published by EA.
Additionally former EA Black Box and Ghost Games employees who would help access game assets and code from previous NFS titles to streamline the development)
Cartel (or alternatively as “Cartel: Palm City” or "Cartel: Miami" ) would be an open world title based on the Mafia Games, the GTA games and the Saints Row games, with elements of Battlefield: Hardline thrown in with an array of weapons and vehicles based on their real life counterparts.
Gameplay wise the driving would be like Need for Speed titles, and on foot and shooting mechanics like BF: Hardline and Saints Row. Plus you can customize your cars and weapons to the same extent in BF: 2042 and some cars would allow for mounted weapons,on foot you can execute people with your equipped weapon like in The Godfather games. On foot would be an FPS view (you can change to a third person view as well) same with having an FPS view in your car.
There would an single player experience point system (like in BF Hardline single player) you gain XP from killing gangsters, and cops blowing up or capturing enemy vehicles and completing main missions, side missions and activities also there will be 15 levels to achieve with each level up unlocking new weapons, vehicles and customization for your weapons and vehicles. As well as a New Game Plus (NG+) where everything you unlocked is carried over and you can also play on the higher difficulties through NG+.
Also there would be five wanted levels for police and five vendetta levels for the gangs should you reach level five gang vendetta you start a Gang War there are three ways to stop a Gang War either bribe the feds, blow up a gang stronghold, or hide out in a safe house. Police wanted levels one and two local units would come after the player, at police wanted level two or three the state police would come after the player. At wanted level four and five the feds would come after the player. The military will only come after the player if they trespass in Fort Rockport or the Palmount Naval Shipyard
The Storyline
In Cartel: Palm City; in a different universe and timeline where there's a total prohibition of all narcotics in the United States in 2010; tells the story of Jack Rourke (the player character) a hardworking rideshare driver at day and a street racer at night who's scraping by in Palm City circa 2019. One fateful night, Jack Rourke has an inadvertent brush with the Blackwell Syndicate (mainly Carl Stoddard and that showcases a life of reward too big to ignore. As he joins the Blackwell Syndicate who are fighting for control of Palm City against five other criminal groups and take the city for the Blackwell Syndicate including recovering evidence that could not only convict the Blackwell Syndicate, as well as a network of crime lords in many countries, (including the other gang’s backers) including the Blackwell Syndicate's backers the Mob and it would also directly implicate the CIA in Palm City’s drug trade with Jack Rourke earning the nickname “El Sicario” for his efforts in driving the other gangs out of Palm City. When he learns how much the drugs were hurting the people of Palm City and all over the country as well as learning that the Blackwell Syndicate had gotten into the drug trade themselves, he contacts FBI agent Chase Linh who relays the story to her and offers the evidence and his testimony in exchange for full immunity for him and his associates, and the evidence on the computer was enough to convict everyone form all the five gangs, but also their crime lord backers from at least half a dozen countries, as well implicating the CIA in this as well as lobbying efforts to keep all narcotics prohibited, leading to a new administration repealing the Narcotics Prohibition law and legalizing low level cannabis. However six months later after the repeal of the Narcotics Prohibition Jack Rourke would be gunned down by Russian Mafia hitmen, Dimitri "Dima '' Mayakovsky and Henry "Black" Blackburn.
The Cast
- Sean Faris - Jack Rourke
- Erik Armando Alvarez - Marcus Blackwell
- Kieth David - Julian “Julius” Little
- Philip Anthony-Rodriguez - Nick Mendoza
- Kelly Hu - Khai Minh Dao
- Travis Willingham - Carl Stoddard
- Eugene Byrd - Marcus “Boomer” Boone
- Adam J. Harrington - Tyson Latchford
- Jack Derges - Tyler "Ty" Morgan
- David Ajala - Sean "Mac" McAlister
- Jessica Madsen - Jessica "Jess" Miller
- Ramon Tikaram - Ravindra "Rav" Chaudhry
- Brooke Burke - Rachel Teller
- Josie Maran - Mia Townsend
- Jonny Cruz - Lucas Rivera
- Ana Marte - Ana Rivera
- Maggie Q - FBI Agent Chase Linh
- Bentino Martinez - CIA Agent Julian Dawes
- Coolie Ranx - Benny King
- Jason Michael Zumwalt - Roman Barkov
- Michael Andrew Hollick - Niko Barkov
- Fred Tatasciore - Tony Alpert
- Josh Coxx - Frank Mercer
- Shontae Saldana - Eva Torres
- Josh Collins - Danny Shaw
- Moti Margolin - Dimitri Glebov
- Jack Yang - Chan Wu
- Graham Shiels - Leo Ray
- Mark Rolston - Neil Roark
- Dean McKenzie - Jonathan Cross
- David Rees Snell - Gregory "GMAC" MacDonald
- Heather Fox - Rose Largo
- Joshua Alba - Zack Maio
- Kurt Caceres - Hector Maio
- Lawrence B. Adisa - Brad Rogers
- Dominique Tipper - Lina Navarro
- David Palffy - Caleb Reece
- David Menkin - Hector "Ming" Domingo
- Bruce Johnson - Wes "Webster" Allen
- William Roberts - Joe "JV" Vega
- Jun-Yamazaki - Toru "Bull" Sato
- Derek Hamilton - Clarence "Razor" Callahan
- Chuck Norris - Chief Norris
- Paul Pape - Jack Keller
- Christina Hendricks - Sam Harper
List of activities
- Story Mission: Missions that advance the plot
- Side Mission: Missions that do not advance the plot but earns extra experience/money
- Street Race: Just like it is in Need for Speed, finish first.
- Combat Race: Just like Street Race, but weapon use is allowed.
- Mayhem: Cause as much destruction as possible and get the highest Cost to State score.
- Car Snatch: Steal a car from the cops or one of the four gangs and bring it to a chop shop and also unlock the car you stole for free.
- Drug/CigaWeapon Trafficking: Deliver drugs/military-grade weapons/Cuban cigars to dealers and avoid the cops and rival gangs.
- Car Delivery: Deliver a load of high-end cars to car dealers.
- Assassination: Find and kill a named character, bonus if you fulfill a special condition
Vehicles
Civilian
- Acura NSX '17, Acura RSX-S '04,
- Alfa Romeo Giulia Quadrifoglio '16,
- Aston Martin DB5 '64, Aston Martin DB11 '17, Aston Martin DB11 Volante '19, Aston Martin Vulcan '16,
- Audi R8 V10 Performance '19, Audi S5 Sportback '17,
- BMW i8 Coupé '18, BMW i8 Coupé K.S. '18, BMW i8 Roadster '18, BMW M2 Competition '19, BMW M3 '06, BMW M3 '10, BMW M3 Evolution II '88, BMW M3 GTR L.E. '06, BMW M4 '18, BMW M4 Convertible '17, BMW M4 GTS '16, BMW M5 '18, BMW X6 M '16, BMW Z4 M40i '19,
- Buick Grand National '87, Buick Cascada '16
- Chevrolet Bel Air '55, Chevrolet C10 Sidestep Pickup '65, Chevrolet Camaro SS '67, Chevrolet Camaro Z28 '14, Chevrolet Colorado ZR2 '17, Chevrolet Corvette Grand Sport '17, Chevrolet Corvette Z06 '13, Chevrolet Corvette ZR1 '19, Chevrolet Corvette Stingray (2020), Chevrolet Corvette Stingray Convertible (2020), Chevrolet Corvette ZO6 (Cross’ ZO6)
- Dodge Challenger SRT8 '14, Dodge Charger '69, Dodge Challenger SRT Hellcat ‘18
- Ferrari 458 Italia '09, Ferrari 458 Spider '11, Ferrari 488 GTB '15, Ferrari 488 Pista '19, Ferrari F40 '87, Ferrari FXX-K Evo '18, Ferrari LaFerrari '13, Ferrari Testarossa Coupé '84,
- Ford F-150 Raptor '17, Ford F-150 SVT Raptor L.E. '17, Ford Focus RS '16, Ford GT '17, Ford Mustang '65, Ford Mustang BOSS 302 '69, Ford Mustang Foxbody '90, Ford Mustang GT '15, Ford Crown Victoria ‘08
- Honda Civic Type-R '00, Honda Civic Type-R '15, Honda NSX Type-R '92, Honda S2000 '09,
- Infiniti Q60 S '17,
- Jaguar F-Type R Convertible '19, Jaguar F-Type R Coupé '16,
- Koenigsegg Regera '16 (Roman’s Regera)
- Lamborghini Aventador S '18, Lamborghini Aventador S Roadster '17, Lamborghini Aventador SVJ Coupe '19, Lamborghini Aventador SVJ Roadster '19, Lamborghini Countach '89, Lamborghini Diablo SV '95, Lamborghini Huracán '18, Lamborghini Huracán Performante '18, Lamborghini Huracán Performante Spyder '18, Lamborghini Huracán Spyder '18, Lamborghini Murciélago SV '10, Lamborghini Gallardo LP 560-4 '08
- Land Rover Defender 110 '15, Land Rover Range Rover Sport SVR '15,
- Lotus Exige S '06,
- Mazda MX-5 '15, Mazda MX-5 '96, Mazda RX-7 Spirit R '02,
- McLaren 570S '15, McLaren 570S Spider '18, McLaren 600LT '18, McLaren F1 '93, McLaren P1 '14, McLaren P1 GTR '15
- Mercedes-AMG A 45 '16, Mercedes-AMG C 63 Coupé '18, Unlocked at REP LVL 18, Mercedes-AMG C 63 Coupé K.S. '18, Mercedes-AMG G 63 '17, Mercedes-AMG GT '15, Mercedes-AMG GT R '17, Mercedes-AMG GT S Roadster '19
- Mercury Cougar '67
- Mini JCW Countryman '17
- Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution IX '07, Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution X '08, Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution X K.S. '08
- Nissan 180SX Type X '96, Nissan 240SX '98, Nissan 350Z ‘03, Nissan 370Z ‘09, Nissan GT-R ‘07, Nissan Fairlady 240ZG '71, Nissan GT-R '17, Nissan Silvia Spec-R Aero '02, Nissan Skyline 2000 GT-R '71, Nissan Skyline GT-R V-Spec '93, Nissan Skyline GT-R V-Spec '99, Nissan Skyline GT-R V-Spec '02,
- Opel Astra '09
- Pagani Huayra BC '17
- Plymouth Barracuda '70
- Polestar 1 '20
- Pontiac Firebird '77, Pontiac Firebird '99, Pontiac GTO '05, Pontiac G8 '08
- Porsche 718 Cayman GTS '18, Porsche 911 Carrera GTS '18, Porsche 911 Carrera GTS Cabriolet '18, Porsche 911 Carrera RSR 2.8 '73, Porsche 911 Carrera S '97, Porsche 911 GT2 RS '18, Porsche 911 GT3 RS '19, Porsche 911 Targa 4 GTS '18, Porsche 911 Turbo S Cabriolet Ex '18, Porsche 911 Turbo S Exclusive '18, Porsche 918 Spyder '15, Porsche Cayman GT4 '15, Porsche Panamera Turbo '17, Porsche 911 Carrera S (991) '12
- SRT Viper GTS '14
- Subaru BRZ Premium '14, Subaru Impreza WRX STI '06, Subaru Impreza WRX STI '10,
- Volkswagen Beetle '63, Volkswagen Golf GTI '76, Volkswagen Golf GTI Clubsport '16,
- Volvo 242 DL '75, Volvo Amazon P130 '70
Military
- Light Vehicles: M1161 ITV, VDV Buggy, LYT2021, MRAP, SPM-3, ZFB-05, Quad Bike, Dirt Bike. Desert Patrol Vehicle. Skid Loader
- Infantry Fighting Vehicles: LAV-25, BTR-90, ZBD-09, AAV-7A1. AMTRAC
- Main Battle Tanks: M1 Abrams, T-90A, Type 99 MBT, HT-95 Levkov
- Anti-Aircraft Vehicles: LAV-AD, 9K22 Tunguska-M, Type 95 AA
- Mobile Artillery: HIMARS
- Helicopters: AH-1Z Viper, Mi-28 Havoc, Z-10W, AH-6 Little Bird, Z-11W, KA-60 Kasatka, UH-1Y Venom, Z-9 Haitun
- Naval Craft: DV-15 Interceptor, RCB-90, RHIB Boat, PWC, ACV
- Emplacements: .50 Cal, M220 TOW Launcher, 9M133 Kornet Launcher, HJ-8 Launcher, Centurion C-RAM, Pantsir-S1, LD-2000 AA, Schipunov 42. Launch Pod
Weapon attachments
- Optics (Pistols): Iron Sights, Improved Iron Sights, Ghost Ring, Mini (RDS), Deltapoint (RDS), Comp M4S (1X) Magnum Scope (2x)
- Optics (Rifles): Short Range; Barska Reflex (RDS), Kobra (RDS), Coyote (RDS), EOTech Sight (1x), PKA-S (1x), HD-33 (1x), F2000 (1.6x) (F2000 only). Medium Range; M145 (3.4x), PK-A (3.4x), PRISMA (3.4x), Mark 4 HAMR (3.5x) ACOG (4x), PSO-1 (4x), JGM-4 (4x). Long Range: CL6x (6x), PKS-07 (7x), Rifle Scope (8x), Hunter (20x), Ballistic (40x), IRNV (1x), FLIR (2x)
- Accessories: Canted Iron Sights, Magnifier (2x), Variable Zoom (2x-14x), Flash Light, Tactical Light, Laser Sight, Tri Beam Laser, Green Laser Sight, LaseLight Combo, Range Finder, Target Detector, Stabilizer.
- Barrel: Standard Barrel, Heavy Barrel, Light Barrel
- Muzzle (ARs/Carbines, DMRs, LMGs, PDWs, and Sidearms): Muzzle Brake, Compensator, Suppressor, Flash Hider, Flash Enhancer.
- Muzzle (shotgun): Duckbill, Full Choke, Modified Choke
- Underbarrel: Underslung Rail (M320, GP-30, M26 MASS), Bipod, Ergo Grip, Angled Grip, Stubby Grip, Vertical Grip, Folding Grip, Potato Grip
- Auxiliary: Straight Pull Bolt, Bipod
- Ammunition: Shotshells, 12 Gauge Buckshot, 12 Gauge Dart, 12 Gauge Frag, 12 Gauge Slug
40mm Grenades, 40mm HE, 40mm Incendiary, 40mm CS, 40mm Dart, 40mm Flashbang, 40mm LVG, 40mm Smoke, 40mm 3GL.
- 25mm Grenades - 25mm Airburst, 25mm Dart, 25mm Smoke.
- Arrows - Broadhead Arrow, Bullet Point Arrow, Explosive Tipped Arrow (Tek Arrows), Poison Arrow
Weapon list
Key: Base weapon (special variant)
- Melee Weapons: Blunt Weapons, Knives, Collapsible Baton, Machete (L.S 16 Machete), Breaching Hammer, Sledge Hammer, Axe, Inquisition Sword, Shovel, Bayonet, ACB-90, Shank, Machete, Bowie, Carbon Fiber, Scout, Survival, Trench, Boot, SEAL, Dive, Tactical, BJ-2, Precision, Baseball Bat, 2x4, Lead Pipe
- Light Pistols; P226, M9, QSZ-92, MP443, G17 (Street Racer Special), FN57. Machine Pistols; CZ-75. G18, TEC-9, MAC-10, MP9, 93R.
- Heavy Pistols: M1911, Compact 45, SW40, DEagle .38, DEagle .357, DEagle .44, DEagle .50, DEagle .501, DEagle .700, 45T (Mercer’s 45T), .40
- Revolvers; Unica 6 .38, Unica 6 .357, Unica 6 .44, Unica 6 .50, Unica 6 .501, Unica 6 .700, .38 Snub, .38 Special, .357 RS, MP412 REX, .44 Magnum (.44 Magnum Force), .501 Magnum Enforcer, .700 Magnum
- Short Rifles/Shotguns; Mare's Leg, Lupara, Shorty 12G (Modern Lupara)
- Personal Defense Weapons/SMGs: MP5, MX4, PP-2000, UMP-45, CBJ-MS, PDW-R, CZ-3A1, JS2, P90, UMP-9, MP7 (Combine MP7) , AS VAL, SR-2, MPX, Groza-4, K10 (Dillinger II), M1A1, M1928 (Dillinger), MP5SD
- Shotguns: QBS-09, 870 MCS, M1014, Hawk 12G, Saiga 12K, SPAS-12, UTS-15, DBV-12, DAO-12, USAS-12, AA-12, 870P Magnum, 37 Stakeout (Cross’ 37 Stakeout), Double-Barrel Shotgun, KSG12, M26 MASS
- Carbines: AK5C, ACW-R, SG553, AKU-12, A-91, ACE 52 CQB, G36C, M4, ACE 21 CQB, Type-95B-1, MTAR-21, Phantom, Groza-1, RO933, AKS-74U, CAR-556, ACWR.
- Assault Rifles: AK-12 (Shovak AK-12), SCAR-L, SCAR-H, M416, SAR-21, AEK-971 (Russian Dillinger), FAMAS, AUG A3, CZ-805, QBZ-95-1, ACE 23, L85A2, F2000 (SC-20K), ARX-160, Bulldog, AN-94, M16A3, M16A4, AKM, L85A2, ARM, MDC, SAR-21, AUG A3, HCAR, SA-58 OSW, HK51, FN FAL, SG510.
- Light Machine Guns: U-100 MK5 (Modern Dillinger), Type 88 LMG, LSAT, PKP Pecheneg, QBB-95-1, M240B, MG4, M249, M60-E4 (M60-ULT), AWS, L86A2, RPK, RPK-74, RPK-12,
- Designated Marksman Rifles: RFB, Mk11 Mod 0, SKS, SVD-12, QBU-88, M39 EMR, ACE 53 SV, SCAR-H SV, M39 EMR
- Sniper Rifles: R700PPS, TRG-42P, CS-LR4, M40A5, Scout Elite, SV-98, JNG-90, 338-Recon, M98B, SRR-61, FY-JS, Dragunov SVD, L115, GOL Magnum, SR338, CS5, .300 Knockout, M200 Intervention, M82A3 .416, M82A3 .50, M82A3 .501, M82A3 .700, M82A3 .900, M82A3 20mm Vulcan, AMR-2 .416, AMR-2 .50, AMR-2 .501, AMR-2 .700, AMR-2 .900 AMR-2 20mm Vulcan, HVM-II, M136 CS, Vidhwansak, Rorsch Mk-1, Rorsch Mk-4, 20mm Vulcan Grenares: M67 Frag, V40 Mini, RGO Impact, M34 Incendiary, M18 Smoke, M84 Flashbang, Hand Flare, CS Gas Grenade, Molotov, AA Mine, AT Mine, SLAM, C4 Explosive, M18 Claymore
- Launchers: M32 MGL, M203, M320, GP-30, M26 MASS, RPG,MBT LAW, FIM-92 Stinger, RPG-7V2, SA-18 Igla, Mk153 SMAW, FGM-148 Javelin, FGM-172 SRAW, XM-25
- Gadgets: Defibrillator, First Aid Pack, Medic Bag, Repair Tool, Ammo Box, Ammo Pack, M224 Mortar, MP-APS, XM25, UCAV, Ballistic Shield, MAV, Motion Sensor, PLD, Radio Beacon, SOFLAM, T-UGS, SUAV, RAWR M240B, RAWR M203, XD-1 Accipiter
Other: Nail Gun
Mission Structure
Prolog (2019)
- The Birth of Art - After winning a big race, Jack Rourke collects the winnings at the Palm City Historical Museum
- An Offer you Can't Refuse - Jack Rourke must evade Volk sicarios with Tyson Lachford and Carl Stoddard members of the Blackwell Syndicate
- Race Day - After the events of the last mission, Jack Rourke partakes in a race day event and wins three events with his Porsche 911 Carrera S (991) '12
- Running Man - Volk sicarios Niko and Dimitri crashes the race day and Jack must get to the Blackwell Garage
Chapter 1 (2019-2021)
- M34 Party - Jack Rourke joins the Blackwell Syndicate and gets acquainted with everyone before going with Tyson in a Pontiac GTO '05 to burn the Volk's cars with M34 Incendiary Grenades as well as stealing GMAC's Lamborghini Gallardo LP 560-4
- Standard Routine - Jack Rourke rolls with Tyson, Stoddard and Jonathan Cross to collect protection money but things go south when they collect from a hotel out of town and Jack Rourke chases after the hotel owner in Cross' car.
- Fair Play - Jack Rourke is tasked with stealing Ryan Cooper's Nissan 240SX and sabotaging it on the eve of the biggest Speedhunter race of the year, the SpeedHunter Championship Finals and in a last minute swap Jack Rourke has to race in place of Tyler Morgan
- Mia Townsend - Jack Rourke is tasked with taking Mia Townsend out for a night at the city... until a gang of Wraith street racers led by Caleb Reece hassles her and Jack Rourke takes them on in a fight
- Get Used To It - After the events of the previous mission Jack Rourke and Tyson Latchford are sent to teach the Wraiths a lesson But Caleb Reece makes it serious and Caleb Reece is wound up being killed by Tyson after a chase around the city alongside Danny Shaw.
- The Saint and The Sinner - It's revealed thtat Caleb Reece was Chief Norris' best friend, and Danny Shaw survives the crash however Stoddard would handle Shaw as Jack Rourke is tasked with infiltrating the Elmore Plaza Hotel and has to kill the manager, Nikki Morris and bomb the hotel before escaping to a funeral and confronts, Danny Shaw and Frank Mercer who are also in attendance. Jack Rourke kills Shaw and nearly kills Frank as well. But Frank tasers Rourke and escapes. It would be revealed that some of the Volk sicarios recognized Sotddard and had to deal with them, then the two escaped in a hearse.
Chapter 2 (2021)
- A Trip to the Countryside - In order to get a large supply of cannabis from Mexico, Jack Rourke takes a team to retrieve the Mexican from Mexican smugglers only to be ambushed by Los Zetas L.S 16 and Volk sicarios, then it's revealed that Roman had paid off the FBI to go after Rourke and his teammates then they came off with the cannabis killing their pursuers in the process.
- Code of Silence - The evidence that Tyson and Stoddard had ripped from the Volk had fallen in the hands of Hector Maio who cut a deal with the FBI, total immunity for the evidence and Jack Rouke is tasked with killing him and retrieving the evidence
- Visiting Rich People - Jack Rourke is tasked with sabotaging a federal proscutor's case against The Mob, the Blackwell Syndicate's backers as well as killing the federal prosecutor in charge of the case.
- Visiting Powerful People - Jack Rourke is tasked with meeting and protecting a powerful member of Palm City's elite, the owner of Prefered Outcomes Julian Daws... though he more than meets the eyes of Jack Rourke
- Agent Dawes - Julian Daws is revealed to be a CIA agent who is tasked with keeping the flow of drugs to Jack's surprise and that he is backing the Blackwell Syndicate through Prefered Outcomes.
- The Drug Trade - Julian Daws walks Jack Rourke through Palm City's drug trade and how the illicit street racing scene is used as a cover to smuggle drugs.
- Great Deal - Tyson Lachford scores a major deal with a drug farm in Georgia who promises to supply them with large amounts of drugs in exchange for access to databases concerning highway patrol routes; however when the deal goes down at a parking garage, the Volk and L.S 16 ambush them.
- Bon Appetit - Jack Rourke drives Eva Torrez, Marcus Blackwell and Julian Daws to the rebuilt Elmore Plaza Hotel for brunch only for Niko and Dimirti with a Volk hit squad to blast the entire lobby with gunfire and C4 explosives, Jack Rourke vaults over with Eva Torrez, Marcus Blackwell and Julian Daws, there Jack Rourke and Eva Torrez rush out through the side entrance and confronts the hit squad with Jack Rourke killing both Niko and Dimirti. However Blackwell wants Jack to confront Jonathan Cross at a doughnut store and reveals that the Volk threatened to turn him over to IAD and is chased throughout the city with Marcus Blackwell putting Cross on permanent retirement by killing him with a Lupara.
Chapter 3 (Finishing the other gangs and downfall of Jack Rourke) (late 2021)
- Happy Anniversary - Jack Rourke is tasked with completing a contract hit against Frank Mercer at the fifth anniversary of the formation of the High-Speed Task Force by firing a sniper rifle stashed in a bathroom
- You Lucky Bastard - After a failed attempt to kill Razor; Roman's personal driver and #2 of the Volk, Jack Rourke is given the contract to kill Razor, first by car bomb but ends up killing Deputy Chief Jack Keller. instead of Razor. Jack Rourke, Tyson and Stoddard would later find Razer at a Burger King. In this Rourke can choose to kill or spare Razor. Rourke would spare him after he tells him that the CIA is deeper in Palm City's drug trade than Jack Rourke is led to believe
- Creme de la Creme - Marcus Blackwell plans to kill Roman, Niko, Demintri and Chan Wu in front of the city's Creme de la Creme, the mayor, the police chief, the FBI director and even the city's richest elite. However things go south and Jack Rourke chases Roman and Niko at the airport where they get to a private jet but is shot down and crash lands on the Cross Mermeroral Bridge Chan Wu is still alive and Jack Rourke executes him and leaves before the cops show up.
- Plugging the Chief - After the events of Creme de la Creme; Chief Norris places to take on the Blackwell Syndicate and to dismantle them, and a contract hit is placed on him where Jack Rourke accepts the contract and kills Chief Norris.
- Election Campaign - The State Governor had launched his reelection bid with the promise get tough on the cartels that had plagued Palm City and like Chief Norris has a contract hit out on him which Jack Rourke is tasked with taking, using a sniper rifle
- Just for Relaxation - Marcus Blackwell tells Jack Rourke about a shipment of Cuban cigars as well as a hidden shipment of diamonds (hot ice) straight from Africa however and Jack Rourke takes a crew to retrieve the shipment from federal customs however it's revealed that instead of diamonds it's Cold Shot... the same drug being pushed by the other gangs.
- The Truth - Jack Rourke and Kahi Minh Dao eavesdrop on Marcus Blackwell and Julain Daws and they learn the truth.
- Moonlighting - Jack Rourke after knowing about the truth takes Tyson to rob the Palm CIty First National in order to retire from the sicario lifestyle and gets into a massive shootout with the PCPD Heat-style.
- The Death of Art - After the heist of Palm City First National Jack Rourke finds Tyson dead and meets Stoddard at the museum only to find out that Stoddard knew about the heist, and used his share of the drug money and clout at Prefered Outcomes to buy out The7 as his personal hit squad, however Jack Rourke manages to kill every member of The7 but spares Stoddard (the player can also kill him but canonically Jack Rourke spares him)
Epilogue (2022)
After the trial and the repeal of the Jack Rurke is placed in the Witness Protection Program in Lakeshore City but six months later after the repeal of the Narcotics Prohibition Jack Rourke would be gunned down by members of the West Side Club, Dimitri "Dima" Mayakovsky and Henry "Black" Blackburn.
The Gangs of Palm City
L.S 16 (Los Salmos 16) - Also known as The Salmos. Backed by the most powerful Mexican drug lords and the most powerful arms traffickers in the world, L.S 16 once ruled all of Palm City In fear until The House stepped in. They’re also the strongest gang in the game with access to military grade weapons and vehicles and each gang kill from them awards 500-1,500 XP depending on the enemy type. They are led by Neil Roark.
The House - The House is a gambling gang with strong ties and backed by the Sicilian Mafia; they run the street scene and the casinos in Palm City. They’re pretty strong but weaker than L.S 16, and they have access to military grade weapons and vehicles each gang kills from them awards 250-800 XP depending on the enemy type. Headed by Lina Navarro.
The Volk - The Volk is a Chinese-Russian gang led by Roman Barkov with Niko Barkov as their enforcer backed by the Triads (Chan Wu), the Russian Mob (Dimitri Glebov), and GMAC's crew (Gregory "GMAC" MacDonald, Rose Largo) for cars who control the weapon smuggling and arms dealing in Palm City. With this backing and access to military grade weapons. They are a mid tier gang and each gang kill from them awards 200-600 XP depending on the enemy type. They are also the ones who go after the Blackwell Syndicate the most.
Palm Kings - The Palm Kings (PKs) is a Black gang made up of Black nationalists who controls Palm Harbor’s rackets and extorts store owners. Led by Benny King, they’re equipped with police-grade weaponry and has strong ties with the PCPD despite this, they are the second weakest gang in the game and each gang kill from them awards 150-500 XP depending if it's a regular to elite
Dixie Paladins - The Dixie Paladins are a white supremacy gang and a militarized version of the Ku Klux Klan (KKK) who controls the Gold Coast Mountains in the mountainous regions of Palm City. they’re the weakest gang in the game and each gang kill from them awards 100-250 XP from regular to elite members. They are led by Tony Alpert
Blackwell Syndicate - The Blackwell Syndicate is a underground criminal organization based in Palm City and is led by Marcus Blackwell with Julian “Julius” Little as underboss, Hector Maio before "Code of Silence" and Zack Maio after "Code of Silence". Nick Mendoza. Khai Minh Dao and Carl Stoddard are caporegimes and Tyson Latchford, Tyler "Ty" Morgan, Sean "Mac" McAlister, Jessica "Jess" Miller as soldiers. Other members include Ravindra "Rav" Chaudhry as the gang's car expert Rachel Teller as the gang's customization expert, Marcus “Boomer” Boone as the gang's weapon experts. The Blackwell Syndicate would be the gang that the player would join. In Act 1, they're an outside and fast tracked to soldier, but in Act 2 the player would be a capo until the end of the game. They are secretly backed by both The Mob and the CIA through Agent Dawes. Jonathan Cross and Mia Townsend are also on the gang's payroll until "Bon Appetit" where Marcus Blackwell executes him with a 870P Magnum to the head. Also Mia would also go with Jack Rourke as well
The police/military force
PCPD - the police force of Palm City/Miami if the player does hostile acts (killing civilians, firing unsuppressed weapons in public, etc) will attract police attention and each kill from them awards 50 XP for regular members and 100 XP for armored members, However the player can bribe the PCPD to look the other way or will even help the player fight the other gangs but would be the target of higher level police forces. (Sort of like it was in The Godfather game) The player can also buy favors from them as well. Also they’ll deploy stronger units at higher heat level alongside the FBI. The cars PCPD drives are the Ford Crown Victoria, Dodge Challenger, Pontiac GTO, and the Chevy Grand Sport
Florida Highway Patrol (FHP) - The state police force and Only appears in wanted levels 3 and above, Each kill from them awards 75 XP for regular state troopers and 150 XP for tactical state troopers. Regular state troopers drives Ford Mustang GTs tactical state troopers drives Nissan GT-R
FBI - Only appears in wanted level 5 the FBI will be called in if the player continues to retaliate against the PCPD. Each kill from them awards 125 XP for regular agents, 250 XP for FBI SWAT and 375 XP for FBI HRT, Like the PCPD the player can bribe the FBI to look the other way, or even help the player fight gangs, or the PCPD but at the second highest price. The FBI also has the second widest array of favors the player can buy. regular agents drives the Nissan 350Z or Porsche 911 GT3 RS, FBI SWAT drives the - Lamborghini Aventador SVJ Roadster or Ford F-150 SVT Raptor L.E. and FBI HRT drives the Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution X or Land Rover Range Rover Sport SVR
Military - Only goes after the player if they trespass in Fort Rockport or the Palmount Naval Shipyard. Each kill from them awards 200 XP for regs, 400 XP for experienced troops and 600 XP for elite troops. Like the PCPD, State Police and the FBI, the player can bribe the military to look the other way, or even help the player fight gangs, the PCPD, State Police or even the FBI but at the highest price and The military also has the widest array of favors the player can buy in large part due to Agent Dawes’ connections in Washington.
Multiplayer portion of the game would take place during the five cartels war where the Blackwell Syndicate, The Volk, Palm Kings, Dixie Paldines, Los Salmos 16, and The House (basically where Jack Rourke glosses over saying "It was non-stop chaos for weeks")
Also there would be a free ride mode where the player can explore the city at their leisure or pick a fight with either other cartels or the cops.
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2023.06.03 04:46 Taonanae Question about preferences of Spren
Spoilers up to dawnshard
I am rereading the stormlight archive and I find it curious that spren treat the natives of the land, the Listeners, so alien.
I'm at the part in WoR where Shallan and Pattern are discussing how "void bringers" bond with spren of Odium.
So since the /ACTUAL/ voidbringers are the humans who travelled to Roshar for refuge and to escape their god (but then Odium was like "well don't mind if I do come with"), it's weird to me that the spren of Roshar so readily bond with off-world beings... maybe it's that they had to migrate to Roshar through the cognitive realm and so the spren were able to interact with them at a face-to-face level and so when they went through to the physical realm, the spren would be more likely to bond with humans vs the Listeners?
As far as the remaining Listeners go, they are attuned to one another like how the land is attuned to emotion. In the first book they were always noted to be singing by our POV characters, it's so cool then that they refer to themselves as "Listeners". They arent calling themselves singers. What they are doing is of nature, they listen and attune, like a buzzing collective. Even the way they change forms demands accommodation from high storms.
So I guess I just always have wondered why the spren prefer humans to the natives of the land. It could be that they are too similar in nature and spren are more drawn toward raw emotion. Like, the Listeners are guided in emotion based on the forms they take. I could see why spren would want to bond a more consistent character. Actually that's probably exactly it, if your nature and morals and such can be so fundamentally and easily changed then why would the spren ever want to try to bond with them?
AND then odium comes along and thrusts their spren into the world and of course they're gonna bond with the Listeners... oh god maybe that's why they fear their "gods" so much??? (Well aside from the body swap feature of it all) the first POV we get of a Listener we are exposed to their culture and they're so.. passive? They arent malicious really at all. I'd be terrified of "god" if the god in question was a being made by Odium's way.. yea..
Sorry for my meanderings lol idk if all thoughts are complete, there might be stuff I'm not remembering all the way since its been a long time from when I read the story first so please forgive lapses lol
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2023.06.03 04:43 Illbetheroundabout Rowan Rogers, Regent of Amberly
Reddit Account: Illbetheroundabout
Discord Tag: Minihawking#8008
Name and House: Rowan (Rowenna) Rogers
Age: 26 (25)
Cultural Group: Stormlander
Appearance: Short in height and average in build, the Ser Rowan Rogers is adorned with a head of wavy brown hair and a pair of amber eyes; although he’d attempted to grow one before his sudden departure from Amberly, since his return Rowan has preferred to keep himself clean shaven. Typically, he might be found wearing a coat or gambeson, along with bearing a peculiar sword of Essosi make as opposed to those from Amberly's own smithy.
Trait: Agile
Skills: Two-Handed Weapons (e), Footwork (e), Armored, Skulker, Medic, Riding
Talent: Writing, Voice Manipulation, Theology
Starting Titles: Ser, Regent of Amberly
Starting Location: Storm's End
Alternate Characters: Roryk Volmark
Biography: As far as the wider world is concerned, the story of Rowan Rogers is as such: he was born in 174 to the Lord Owen Rogers and his wife, with a younger sister to follow in the year 175 (claiming their mother in the childbed). He was a restless, reckless youth, never quite content with the life set forth for him as heir. So, as he came of age in 192, he would embark on a foreign tour of the Free Cities, being assumed dead by 194.
His sister- now heir- would marry their cousin and bore him a son named Eustace in 195; Corwin and Lord Owen were lost in a storm at sea in 196, upon which time the young Lady Rogers instead chose the life of a septa rather than rulership, fading into irrelevance thereafter.
Fortuitously, in 198 Rowan made his return. A changed man from his time in Essos, Rowan had grown devoted to kin; choosing not to challenge his nephew’s succession towards the seat of Amberly, he has since served as a faithful regent.
However, not all is what appears to be.
It is true enough that Ser Rowan Rogers had wandered off and vanished within Essos, along with his sister being deprived of her own inheritance so soon after the death of her husband by being made a septa. What followed thereafter, however, requires knowing the story of his sister.
Rowenna Rogers was born in 175, her birth claiming her mother’s life. Although the two looked much alike even as they aged, she stood in contrast to her brother, being rather meek and at least outwardly content with her station in life. Rowan's flight from the Seven Kingdoms and subsequent being taken for dead threw this in disorder: suddenly she was being ordered to marry a cousin and to bear him a child such that the line might continue, and she complied without complaint.
Within such a situation, she was able to find some sort of happiness, especially as Corwin was by no means a terrible man. But, the Gods had other plans and so claimed both her father and husband in one fell swoop: if one had survived perhaps a bit longer, Rowenna might have been able to hold onto her inheritance, but the rest of cousins were an ambitious sort, deciding it best that the stewardship of Amberly fell to them. Coercing her into assuming the vows of the septa, they thereafter assumed control of their Eustace’s regency towards their own ends.
This perhaps should have been the end of Rowenna's story, if not for a rather uncharacteristically rash action on her part after several months of receiving training in her new vocation: she had no wish for her son to be nothing but a pawn for her cousins, nor did she believe her brother truly dead. So, she contrived an escape towards Essos, intent on seeking Rowan out in the hopes that he might reclaim his rightful seat- thus taking Eustace out of harm’s way.
Cleaving her hair and binding her chest, the better part of a few months were spent throughout the Free Cities in picking up Rowan's trail, to which she found that he’d joined up with a group of sellswords whom were currently quartering in Pentos. So off she went with joy in her heart, believing that her task was nearly at an end.
If only it’d been that simple.
Rowan was indeed in Pentos, and was in fact intact in body- in spirit, however, he’d taken to drink on a regular basis, and so Rowenna found him bedeviled by spirits within a tavern. Attempting to drag him elsewhere so she might reveal her identity and purpose, there was a slight complication: he assumed her a fellow man and misattributed the intent behind a want of privacy. Flying at Rowan in a drunken rage, she made no effort to defend herself; she merely stepped out of the way.
Perhaps it’d have been better for her to strike him, she would think later.
Taking a tumble as he flew past his sister, Rowan dashed his brains upon the cobblestone outside the tavern, thus ending his line.
Rowenna fled in a panic, agonizing over what might be done; what could be done now that she’d been responsible for the death of her brother. And indeed, she was responsible: he’d not have flown into that rage if not for her presence, for that mistake of identity. Initially resigning herself to never seeing her son again and his fate as a pawn for his cousins, a path forward would be shown in the days that followed Rowan's death: another case of mistaken identity.
Having remained within Pentos and within the same guise as before, she would be recognized by some of Rowan's fellow sellswords: not for whom she was, but as being Rowan. The two had never fully outgrown their resemblance toward one another- there was a minute difference in height, but that was a matter easily solved.
Thus sailing back to Westeros, the stories converge here: Rowenna is Rowan whom is truly dead and whom is raising her own son as his nephew, with the pressure of everything related to this matter weighing upon Rowenna heavily. Perhaps one day the truth of things might be revealed- ideally on his own terms- but for now, watching Eustace grow strong and healthy…. Rowenna can bear being Rowan for a little while longer.
Timeline: - 174: The True Rowan Rogers is born.
- 175: Rowenna Rogers is born.
- 192: Rowan Rogers flees from home during a foreign tour of Essos, not wishing to be burdened with a lordship.
- 194: Rowan Rogers is presumed dead; his sole sister Rowenna is proclaimed heir and married to a cousin of her father's side, Corwin.
- 195: Eustace Rogers is born.
- 196: Lord Owen and Corwin perish in a storm; Rowenna is coerced into abdication to her son and to take the vows of a septa by other cousins of her father's line.
- ~196-197: Rowenna flees whilst being trained, cleaving hair and binding breast so she might disguise herself in search of her brother.
- ~197-198: Finding Rowan in Pentos, an accident leads to his death; Rowenna is mistaken in her guise as being Rowan thereafter, and so contrives to pass herself off as Rowan upon returning to Westeros.
- 198: "Rowan" arrives in Amberly; he upholds the inheritance of his "nephew" and instead chooses to serve as regent.
- ~198-200: Rowan, professing a lack of practice in swordsmanship during his six years away, devotes himself wholly towards training himself in martial affairs, preferring a two-handed sword acquired in Essos to those commonly seen in Amberly.
- 200: Representing his nephew, the Ser Rowan Rogers, Regent of Amberly, sallies forth towards Storm's End for the council.
Family Tree Archetypes: - Benedict Rogers: General
- Erryk Rogers: Warrior (Longsword)
- Brandon Rogers: Scholar
- Cayn Rogers: Ship Captain
- Julian Rogers: Marksman
- Agnes Rogers: Questioner
- Cass Rogers: Trader
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2023.06.03 04:00 FeldMonster Fast Five Ford GT40 (Newport Car Musuem)
| Went to the Newport (RI) Car Museum last weekend. I highly recommend the museum in general as a car enthusiast, but I thought that my fellow Fast & Furious fans would be interested in the Fast Five GT40 on display there, specifically. submitted by FeldMonster to fastandfurious [link] [comments] |
2023.06.03 03:54 Uncle__Jerry 200 Days Today, Still Miss It
I hit 200 days today. I feel much better, but miss it so damn much.
First time I ever smoked was when I was 30 years old. Before I knew it, I was smoking every day and before long I was dabbing every waking moment. This went on for six years. My life evolved around planning on when I could get high and what I would do while I was high. I loved the way my mind worked on it, it felt like the real me. When sober, there was too much head trash, too many thoughts thrashing around inside, too much pain.
Weed became my best friend. It was an escape from the world, an intimate moment with myself and these wonderful thoughts would arise as my mind traveled to places it had never been before. My God and the music... the music was exhilarating. I would lie down for hours just smoking and listening to new and old tunes and hear each specific sound and how beautiful it was that all these sounds were coming together to form what it was.
But somewhere along the way, I could no longer control my emotions. I would become extremely irritated and angry at simple things that others would do. A blanket of darkness would instantly come over me and I could physically feel the energy pushing down on my whole body. I would be so pissed off at the whole world. I didn't want to be with my wife, my kids, my friends, not even myself. I didn't want to exist on Earth anymore. I no longer wanted to live.
I was depressed and something had to change. I was convinced that quitting was only going to make things worse as I believed weed was the only thing helping me get through the pain I was in. When I was sober I only wanted to be high, but when I was high I only wanted to be sober. This confused me greatly. I decided to take a break from weed just to prove there was something wrong with me.
The first week off was hell. Emotions were out of control, but also shortness of breath, and heat waves throughout the body. It felt like I was betraying my best friend--weed was there for me when no one else was. I felt as though I owed it to "it" to keep smoking in a weird way. The second week I felt better and thought I might as well keep going if I already got through the hardest part. The third week was difficult again, trying to break the habit of daily activities where I'd normally be high. After the third week though, the daily GI issues I was experiencing suddenly lessened, I was able to wake up in the morning without normal severe abdominal pain I had been experiencing for the past three years. From there I kept pushing onward.
It wasn't until 95 days in where I totally started to feel better mentally. The fog lifted weeks before that, but I no longer had the blanket of darkness come over me. I was much better able to cope with life and others around me. Things that I used to be so worried about didn't seem like a big deal anymore. I pushed on further and before I realized it I am now at day 200.
Overall, mentally I am feeling so much better than before. I am learning to live a sober life still but I still think about smoking daily (not near as much as the beginning). I still have issues, those didn't go away, but I am much better equipped to deal with them than I was before. I will push on as I know that is what I need.
For those just starting out in your journey, some of the things that helped me get this far are:
- This subreddit. Whenever I feel the urge, I come here first and read through other's experiences to remind myself of what it used to be. I have spent many hours crying over other's posts knowing that I wasn't in this alone.
- Journaling. I've been journaling for about four years now, but journaling through sobriety has been extremely helpful. For one, putting your inner thoughts onto paper releases energy in some way so it is no longer inside. It can be about anything, your day, what you are thinking, how you are struggling, what is and isn't going well, or it can be as simple as "Fuck this shit" as many of my entries have littered throughout. As days go by, it is so helpful to look back to see the progress I've made since day one and remember how I don't want to go back.
- Apps. I use the "I Am Sober" app to keep the days counting for me. There is also a small community there of others who are counting days with me which is neat. I also use the "Daylio" app to track my moods and what I do each and every day. This helps give an overview so I can easily see how I am improving as the days turn into weeks and the weeks into months.
- Another Being. Find someone who you can trust wholeheartedly that you can openly share your experience with. For me it was my wife. I had never opened up to her about my addiction. She obviously knew I was smoking all the time, but she had no idea of the inner turmoil I was experiencing. I was alone and opening up allowed someone to help me in this journey.
Sorry this post is so long, I could go on for so much longer, but I just wanted to share my experience here with this wonderful community. The more information we share with each other, the better off we all are in this journey together. Onto the next 200...
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2023.06.03 03:46 Malice_Qahwah Scurrying Darkness (Oneshot, gory, horror)
****WARNING****
***
Body Horror, bugs, death, gore. Attempted horror.
By my own standards, this is fairly tame, your mileage may vary, content advisory.
***
Captain Van’tu, the Garaboosian commander of the Alliance of Free Stars light scout cruiser Mandrake, frowned, in the way of his species, and gestured with a lower lefthand at his human science officer to continue.
The woman turned back to her console, to peer into the hood of her ‘scope and minutely adjust a control.
“The ship is an old Terran Alliance Explorer class, the TAN Nebula Star. She was reported overdue for resupply a little over a hundred years ago, exact details are spotty as the station she was supposed to report to was destroyed in the Terran civil war. By modern standards she was little more than a heavy cruiser with an oversized jumpcore, and limited weaponry. The Terran Alliance Navy was very much focused on exploration and first contact, and several of their vessels vanished without trace only to show up decades later in pirate hands. However, this does not seem to be the case with the Nebula Star…”
The image on the holotable was mute testimony to this information. The old starship, much more massive than the Mandrake, but significantly less well equipped, looked derelict. Several holes gaped in her once-pristene white hull, the smooth lines marred and crooked, and the jumpcore bulb near the stern showed a terrible, blasted crater, black with soot and melted steel.
Captain Van’tu scrolled the smooth wheel of the holo controls, swivelling the image and zooming into the damage.
“What do we think of this, Sasha, that looks like an internal explosion, not battle damage.”
“Yes Captain.” Sasha, the science officer, agreed. She manipulated a pad on her side of the console. Several sidebars lit up. “Here, here and here. Chemical signatures we’ve picked up in the dustcloud around the wreck, and the blast pattern, indicates a high yield chemical explosive was utilised, we would need to get a scan from inside the wreckage to be certain, but I think I can confidently say this was caused by a c4 package commonly kept as part of ship inventories of that era. We carry a similar type of explosive even now, it has uses in a number of emergency protocols.”
The captain nodded. “I’m familiar with Human paranoia, ‘better to have and not need than need and not have’, which is why I learned to carry a backpack heavier than myself at the academy.” He smiled at the woman, who grinned back in that wolfish human fashion.
Commanding a Terran vessel as part of the Alliance Navy was a high honour for a non-Terran, and he’d earned it the hard way, he’d actually completed his officer training on Earth itself, heavy gravity, lethal flora, fauna, and practical jokes be damned, he’d always dreamed of command, and he had never planned to settle for anything less than the best ships of the fleet.
Somehow his determination to ‘make it’ had actually impressed his trainers and teachers, and earned him the interest of a senior Admiral, which explained his current command. And he was no ticket-puncher, his crew was, in his opinion, the best in the fleet, and if his ship was small, he was so proud of her, some days he could almost burst his hearts from it. She was his first, and with luck, not his last, and while scouting duty following pre-war exploration routes was far from glamorous, it was essential work for the Alliance, following up first contacts, reopening lost trade routes, and, now and then, coming across relics, and giving closure to the descendants of those vanished vessels.
“Alright. She looks cold, and her reactor is dead, but we don’t know what happened to her, she could have run afoul of pirates, or been captured and misused for decades, or been left boobytrapped, so pack up a SAR shuttle, and give them a leader drone, they don’t enter unless the drone clears the way in.”
“Aye aye Captain, I’ll get them on their way. Sidearms?”
“Yyy…esss. Yes. And overarmour. If someone’s left any surprises, it will help.”
Sasha turned and walked off, already tapping her communicator to summon the personnel she’d be sending.
He frowned again, looking into the depths of the hologram. Something was bothering him, the same sensation he’d felt while visiting a zoo on Earth. Humans around him grinning, nodding to one another, and the confirmation of his worry came as a boom of hundreds of pounds of apex feline carnivore crashing against the high density crystal he’d been standing with his back to…
Something was creeping up on them, he could feel it.
***
The shuttle launched from the brightly lit boatbay of the Mandrake, arcing smoothly through the glittering blackness towards the cruelly murdered starship. In front of it zipped the mote of the drone, its scanners and sensors slaved to the shuttle, giving the drone specialist on board an instant feed to all his senses, feeling, experiencing everything the drone saw.
It zipped around the gaping hole where the jumpdrive had once been housed, then around in a helical pattern, scanning every micron of the lost ships hull, mapping it in complete three dimensional perfection, then tracking towards the boatbay. Inside, two, much older, versions of the Mandrakes shuttle rested, crooked against their davits, the bay airlock doors lying open.
The drone slowly crept inside the dark corridor as the shuttle followed it in, nestling into an empty davit. Power hookups, identical after a century thanks to long ago agreed standardisation, marry up, pogo pins compressed and energized, drawing trickle power from the shuttle to latch securely.
The crew debark, except the probe operator who remained strapped in his jumpseat, guiding the drone deeper into the derelict.
Suited figures follow its path, jumping from the shuttle hatch to the airlock. They don’t bother trying to seal it, it had been lying open for a century, there was no air left within to preserve. The drone met a cross passage, and moved right, headed towards the bridge, following schematics downloaded from Mandrake’s computer. The scout crew followed, alert, and making note of damage to bulkheads, the carpets that once covered the floors looking torn, dark stains telling a worrying story.
The probe entered the bridge of the Nebula Star and paused. The LIDAR scanner illuminated the space in a slow pass of green laser light, left to right and back again. The chamber was empty, save the various consoles and chairs the crew would have used, and the lone figure of the Captain, in his central command chair.
To Captain Van’tu, observing the time delayed remote feed on his own bridge, it was remarkable just how similar the darkened derelict wreck was to his own vessel, down to the arrangement of bridge consoles and type of carpeting used. He’d read, in one of his intro to ship design classes, that Terran bridge layout owed much to speculative fiction of pre-spaceflight eras, and a lot of experimental wet-navy designs.
He'd brought it up once with his chief of engineering, who had responded with a ridiculous approximation of a Scottish accent, “Aye laddie, we Terrans owe an awfy lot tae an auld lass called the Enterprise!” and laughed, continuing his explanation in his more natural German accented standardised Terran. Van’tu had spent several informative evenings with his console, soaking up ancient Terran entertainment as a result.
The drone circled the bridge, slowly, keeping its thruster exhaust well clear of the mummified body in the central chair, making its way to the science console. A small arm popped out and slotted into the consoles data port.
Several lights flickered on the antique panel, the probe powering up the cold circuits to read the datalogs, then around the room, dim red lights came to life, as more of the bridge woke up. Through the hull itself, a faint whine transmitted, the probes oversized fusion battery providing enough current to trigger the startup of a backup generator below the bridge.
The scouting party stepped in, peering around. One, her grey skinsuit marked with a red stripe down the arms, moves across to the captain, a medical scanner in her hand.
“I’m reading significant trauma throughout the corpse, but remarkable preservation as well. Life support must have been glitching badly for a long time after… Wait…” She smacked the side of the scanner, then passed it back across the corpse. “Scanner keeps picking up my own heartbeat, trying to tell me this guys still alive, fucking thing.” She put it away in the side pocket of her suit and pulled out a smaller device. “I kept my old one, should be good enough to… Fuck me sideways…”
“Maybe later Carol, what’s the script?” A green stripe on the party leader’s arm. He was looking around, feeling… itchy, between his shoulder blades. Something wasn’t right, and not just the dead ship. He’d been lead on two other derelict searches, and they never went like this. Accidents happened, people died, usually horribly, and you always found, well, bodies. Whole or otherwise. Yet, aside from the clearly traumatic bloodstains on the floors, soaked long before the artificial gravity had failed, this ship hadn’t shown them a single body, nothing, not even fragments.
Not only that but he could swear he’d seen movements. No-one else had, but he also knew that his reflexes tested significantly higher than average, he was seeing something the others were simply not noticing.
Carol stepped away from the corpse.
“My old scanner says this guy’s alive Mark. Heartbeat, brain activity, oxygenated blood. He’s not breathing and he’s a fucking corpse, but both my scanners say he’s gooey in the middle. And I’ll be honest I don’t want to be here, send probes back across on AI control and let them explore, this is too freaky. I know you’ve been seeing shit, well, I’ve been picking up weirdness all along, and this is too much. We should leave!”
Mark bit back a curse. He agreed, but he was also supposed to be a professional, and as the leader of the scout team who first boarded the derelict, he’d have been slated for command of the ‘prize crew’ to bring her home. At the same time, he was holding back a growing uneasiness, his other two team members were shuffling nervously, and Carol was on the edge of panic.
“Alright, we head back to the shuttle and leave the probe to grab the logs. Something’s weird here, might be the atmosphere on this thing, I admit it’s spooky, but we all know I see weird bugs and things other folk miss, and Carol, you’ve had that personal scanner since high school, if it’s saying something weird, something weird is going on. If Captain… Morrison, is still alive after a century in vacuum, he can keep a few more hours until the AI probes can collect him. We’re not equipped for medical evac anyway.”
They stepped back through the hatchway, leaving the probe to its work. Emergency lighting flickered into life, adding a lurid red glare to the tableaux, Mark, last to leave, sharply snapping his head back around as something… He was reminded of a time as a child, he’d turned over a log in his parents’ yard, and hundreds of inch-long centipedes had scurried in panicked circles to escape the sudden glare of sunlight.
Nothing moved, aside from the slow pulsing of rebooting computers.
He followed his people towards the shuttle.
One by one, they made the leap back to the shuttle davit, and boarded, cycling back aboard, and taking their seats. The drone pilot barely moved to acknowledge them, clearly lost in the datefeed from the old computers, and aside from a quick glance across readouts to ensure the data was flowing cleanly to the Mandrake, Mark didn’t disturb the man.
He hit the switch to release the davit clamps, and the popped free. The shuttle turned, and smoothly glided out, aligning with the mothership and headed home. He blinked and shook his head. That motion again, out the corner of his eye. He glanced over, seeing the drone pilot’s faceplate swarming with legs for a fraction of a second.
“Uhh, Josh, you alright there?” He hated breaking into drone pilot concentration, but this wasn’t right, and Carol was gesturing desperately at him from her chair. He reached across, and nudged Josh’s shoulder, the skinsuit collapsing under his fingers and the skull clacking loosely against the faceplate.
***
Captain Van’tu listened to the soft report coming from Sasha, the scout crew had found the captain of the derelict but were returning early due to some unsettling information they’d found. He didn’t like it, but he also respected human instincts. If skilled officers felt there was a reason to withdraw before mission completion, he knew better than to override the human-on-the-spot.
He’d have a word with Mark later, in private, if necessary, but the man had never been wrong before.
Across the communicator, there was a sudden eruption of yelling, the shuttle on the holo spiralling wildly. Sasha was demanding a clear response from the screaming communicator.
Mark came over the channel. “Abort mission, contamination, alien threat…” His words ended in a gurgling scream, the kind that began high and ended, eventually, in a growling snarl of mortal agony. The line remained open, however, and the entire bridge crew turned to stare, mouths agape, as into the silence the faint sounds of gnawing began to echo.
Sasha shut off the feed with a shaky finger. “Captain, I…”
“I know. Arm several probes, get them to the shuttle, find out what happened and…”
Once more, attention fell to the holo display, as on it, the icon of the shuttle winked red. Sasha motioned, and the focus zoomed in. Where the shuttle had been, a spreading scatter of debris remained.
She pulled up the sidebars again.
“Right before Mark, uh, died, his authorisation codes were used to trigger an overload on the shuttle reactor. We didn’t pick up the feed in real time, they were returning after all, but all of them suffered catastrophic biological distress immediately before their lifesigns cut out. Mark was the last one alive, and severely injured when he triggered the reactor.”
Captain Van’tu shook out his lower hands with a stress-shedding gesture. “The shuttle reactor is in a sealed compartment. He had to get from his chair to the access panel and enter his code, while suffering life threatening injuries which had already killed the rest of his crew?”
“Yes, Captain. I’m sorry, I missed it, my team is still processing the data, but it looks as if the drone pilot ceased responding several minutes before the shuttle departed the wreck. At five minutes into the flight, the three junior officers began exhibiting distress, but gave no verbal alerts. Mark seems to have reacted to something that triggered a fight or flight response, but within a few seconds was exhibiting the same injury markers as the others. At the six-minute mark, he sent his warning, while moving. It appears as if the cessation of his vocalisations was not the end of his life, almost thirty seconds later his code was entered into the shuttle reactor, and it detonated.”
Captain Van’tu moved to his command chair, and sat down, lower hands grasping the armrests, upper hands folding under his chin. “Helm, chart course back to the nearest Alliance outpost, and warm up the jumpcore. Tactical, bring shields to standby and start charging the grasers, I don’t like what’s happening, and I do not want to be caught with our backs turned.”
His crew moved into action, tactical alerts bringing various stations to readiness.
“Sir! We’re receiving a communications request, uh, from the Nebula Star.”
He stared at his communications officer, who looked equally shocked.
“Please, Jen, put them through to the main holo.”
The hovering image of the wreckage that had once been a shuttle vanished, replaced by the familiastrange image of the old bridge, and its captain.
The man was a corpse, there was no debate. The papery skin had pulled back from his eyes and teeth, his nose collapsed inwards, decades of icy coldness and baking heat as the derelict tumbled slowly from shade to sunlight had freeze dried the body, yet, it moved. The jaw flapped open, and the sticklike arms gestured against the command chair arms, clawed fingertips clicking uselessly.
“Gree. Tings. Un. Known. Vess. Sell. I. Am. Cap. Tan. Morr. Iss. Son. We. Come. In. Peace.”
The corpse in the holo quivered and twitched in some horrible mockery of life, the bared grey teeth clicking as the jaw spasmed open and closed, not, Van’tu noted, in time with the words being spoken. Inside the jaws, he also noticed, something black and shiny and segmented.
“I highly doubt you come with any sort of peace in mind, what are you really, and what did you do to the crew of the shuttle who boarded the ship you are on.”
The body twitched, a trickle of black ooze popping free from the corner of the sunken eye socket. Under the dried up eyelid, something squirmed around, curling with segmented motion, a few pointed claws poking briefly free before vanishing once more.
“I. Am. Cap. Tan. Morr. Iss. Son. We. Come. In. Peace. We. Rek. Wire. Ass. Iss. Tan. Sse. Let. Uss. Board.”
An alert flashed from Sashas direction. A gesture diminished Captain Morrison to a corner of the holo and expanded the view of the derelict. Two shuttles of archaic design had just launched from it and begun making their way towards the Mandrake. He muted his pickup and turned to his tactical officer.
“Jeff? They do not get close enough to board.”
“Aye aye sir, tracking has them locked and my grazers are charged.”
“Very good.”
He returned to the holo and reopened the grisly view of the dead man being puppeted on his display.
“You will not be permitted to board my ship. I demand to know who you are, what you represent, and why you are trying to impersonate Captain Morrison.”
“You. Are. Food. You. Have. Use. Full. Tech. Nol. Ogy. We. Will. Take. It. We. Will. Use. You. We. Will. Mul. Tip. Lie. This. Vess. Hell. Came. To. Us. In. Peace. We. Took. It. We. Came. For. Ter. Rah. We. Became. Trapped. We Became. Lethargic. We have waited. Now you have brought us. A new vessel to carry us. To Terra.”
Captain Van’tu shook his head. If these things were familiar with humans, they’d recognise the gesture. For the sake of understanding he’d long ago learned to at least emulate some human body language.
“You will not be allowed to go any further. I have a duty to safeguard the people under my command, and to the people of… Terra.” Whatever this species was, it was not something he wanted anywhere near a colony or, worse, defenceless homeworld, of any of the Allied or friendly species he knew lay between here and Terra herself. Best for all they only had Terra in mind.
“Sir! The incoming shuttles are not going for docking, they’re on a ramming approach! Firing solution lost on bogey one!” The Mandrakes grazers were firing, gunnery crews managing their weapons as they tracked automatically and fired, spearing one of the wildly corkscrewing shuttles with lances of gravitationally focused gamma radiation. The second shuttle however spun, and fell downwards, smashing into the still warming shields, and through, impacting the Mandrakes hull with tremendous speed.
The scouting vessel shuddered. The shuttle had breached through the outer hull and spilled into a mess area.
Thanks to the alert condition, all crew had been in skinsuits, not that this helped the two cooks who had been finishing off the lockdown of the mess kitchen.
Fresh alerts sounded, the sound of which sent crewpeople to arms lockers. Mandrake had been boarded.
Captain Van’tu pointed to his tactical officer. “Destroy that wreck! vaporise it!”
“Sir! Weapons are offline, on-mount crews are reporting power losses.”
Across the bridge, the communications officer looked up. “Reports coming in, boarders are breaking out of mess two!”
The captain snarled. Ancient Garaboosians had warded off predators with that sound, and his teeth bared in an animalistic threat display. He slammed a finger into the appropriate button on his armrest.
“All hands, all hands, defence stations, repel boarders!”
His head snapped around. “Sasha, do we still have telemetry from the drone on the Nebula? If so, I want it to shut that shitheap down, or overload its reactors!”
His science officer acknowledged with an “Aye captain!” and turned to her console.
He returned to his holo. Removed the mute. “You have attacked an Alliance of Free Stars vessel, while using a Terran Alliance vessel reported lost to causes unknown. I am hereby declaring you to be pirates, and you will be treated accordingly. Surrender now and you will be returned to your government or homeworld after serving a prison term to be determined by Admiralty courts.”
He did not expect the thing pretending to be Captain Morrison to surrender.
“There will be no surrender. We will take all you have and all you are. You will be ours to consume and use.”
His tactical alert flashed, somehow, the older ship was charging its weapons systems. He flicked a gesture, and the old vessels appeared, with sidebars. The weapons were underpowered, and normally not really a threat to a modern vessel, but the Mandrake had just been rammed by a shuttle, cutting power to her own weapons, and disrupting her shields, it would take several more minutes to regenerate them.
He glared at the grinning visage of the corpse which was still mimicking life. The left arm was still quivering against the rest, fingertips drumming against a keypad almost identical to his own. From the bottom of the sunken belly of the dead man, a slowly undulating shape crawled, a thick-pincered head, followed by a segmented body flowing with sharp-tipped clawlike legs. It moved upwards and climbed back in through Morrisons throat.
“Captain, boarders have been destroyed. Sir, they were humans, but they were dead. Like mummies. They had some kinds of bugs inside, we had to go in with plasma to clear them out.”
“I see. Ensure all the bulkhead seals around the messhall compartment are still green, and pull everyone back, full medical scans on exit. Once everyone is clear, blow the compartment.”
“Uh, yes, sir, understood. Engineering teams are saying they’ll have full weapons restored in eight minutes.”
“Good. We can’t allow any of these things to get back to inhabited space. I want that wreck vaporised. Mess compartment too.”
He continued to watch the dead mans fingers rattle against the old command chair. And nodded.
“Captain Morrison, it has been an honour. Captain Van’Tu, out.”
In the holo, the corpse finally went still. The creatures which had inhabited him began to swarm, black blood and ichor bursting from his skull as the mother of the monsters which had ridden his body and his ship since they had tricked their way aboard a century before, burst free from her manipulating, feeding grasp in his skull.
“Captain, the drone has fully copied the Nebula Stars database, but is unable to access any critical systems. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay Sasha. When we have weapons available, we’ll finish whatever is left.”
“Sir? I don’t understand what…”
The holo tank cut her off. The Nebula Star had fired its engines, angling towards an intercept with the Mandrake, it needed to be much closer to engage with its much more primitive weapons. As the engines flared to life, fire blossomed across the aft hull. Multiple explosions rippled through it, billowing outwards from within, as the reawakened fusion reactors, initially stirred to life by the probes batteries, then by crawling undead crew hidden in the ships dead spaces, all overloaded, and detonated in a final orgy of self-annihilation.
There was a shudder again, as the Mandrakes crew activated the emergency charges that blew an entire section of the ship into space, carrying with it the bodies of dozens of the Nebula Stars crew, hundreds of incinerated and still crawling parasitic alien monsters, and the corpses of two unfortunate cooks.
“Begin sweeping everything in range with fire, maximum power and aperture, everything must burn. I want medical and bio survey teams going around the clock scanning for any trace of those things that might have breached containment. For the record, I will be recommending the Mandrake be scuttled once all crew are cleared and disembarked. Needless to say, we will not be making any landfall or station docks before then.”
He sat down in his command chair. He couldn’t remember standing up. He stared down at his armrest, and the keypad on it. With the fingers of his bottom left hand, he began typing, sending the results to the main holo where Sasha watched, curious.
ENMY HMWRLD r41429.135 i334451 b-1.791 KILL BURN QURTN
The rest of the sequence was the override code that would trigger the Nebula Star to overload its powerplants and blow itself to pieces before it could be used against its creators.
“Captain? How did you get that message? The log entries are still being processed, but it doesn’t look like anything coherent survived, there’s no co-ordinates in them.” Sasha was confused, and Captain Van’Tu smiled.
“Humans, you’re all the same when it comes down to the wire. Mark blew his shuttle rather than let it dock with those things on board. Even while they ate him alive, he crawled through his command, to do his duty to his species, and to the galaxy. Captain Morrison held off death, kept those things guessing, somehow, as they tried to use him, his ship, to reach Earth, made them keep him in some sort of horrific half-life, until they were distracted enough that he could get back control of his hand. His chair Sasha, same as mine. Probably came out of the same factory, a century apart, and he was typing, while they tried to speak to us, while they tried to board us, shoot us, while we distracted them, he set them up to give us the knowledge he knew we would need to ensure they would never threaten anyone again.”
Fire was still blossoming across the larger area of the holo display, graser weapons detonating fragments of hull with nuclear fire.
“Once we’ve cleared the skies here, we head to an outpost, and start warning the Admiralty. Jobs not over until these things are completely contained.”
***
103 Years, 4 months, 5 days before.
Jack staggered, his leg still bleeding from where a crewman had slashed at him with fingers broken into sharp bone claws. He’d stamped the mans head until the skull popped, rupturing the centipede thing curled inside. He was close. The familiar, once comforting hallways of the Nebula Star had become nightmarish, red lighting and blotches of gore, streaks of blood on the pristine walls, he was living in a horror game, but he had a job to finish.
He pushed off the wall he’d leant against. Behind him, he could hear screaming, and begging. He didn’t stop. It was a trick. They found the noises amusing, and mimicked them, discovering that it could draw in ‘helpers’ they could ambush.
Aft section, frame fourteen, jumpcore bay. He slapped the button, and fell through the door as it slid open. Inside, the bay was immaculate, no-one had been in here since this had started. How they had gotten aboard, he didn’t know.
Inside the skull of a landing team member, he could guess.
He knelt beside the humming machinery. His vision was going grey around the edges, he could feel dripping around his knees, he was kneeling in a pool of his own blood after only a few seconds, he didn’t have long.
He pushed his burden against the drive casing, the chem-catalyst agent on the back bonding it to the drive with a molecular weld.
He pressed the keypad of the emergency c4 cannister, the detonator arming with a beep, and a green telltale.
He typed in a code, short, sweet, he’d forgotten it by the time he reached the end, it didn’t matter. The disarm code was only for when you wanted to be able to stop the countdown. Ten seconds.
They reached him, before it finished counting. Inside his brain, they couldn’t find the code to stop the bomb.
The Nebula Star would not reach Terra, he made sure of that.
As the jumpcore failed, blowing a ragged hole out of the sleek hull, a single shuttle spun away from the boatbay, damaged, lifeless, cold and drifting outwards into the depths of space, the mutilated human corpse within stirring once with scurrying life, then going still.
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2023.06.03 03:24 wtfwafflezor (Selling) 800 Titles Dungeons & Dragons Vudu HD iTunes 4K $8 Batman 2022 Vudu HD $2.50
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10 Cloverfield Lane (2016) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6
12 Monkeys (1995) (MA/4K) $4
1917 (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $3.50
2012 (2009) (MA/4K) $6.50
21 Bridges (2019) (iTunes/4K) $3
21 Jump Street (2012) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $2.75
3 From Hell (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $3.50
31 (2016) (Vudu/HD) $2.50
355, The (2022) (MA/HD) $5.75
47 Ronin (2013) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $4 (MA/HD) $3.50
80 for Brady (2023) (iTunes/4K) $6.50
A Clockwork Orange (1972) (MA/4K) $6.50
A Cure for Wellness (2017) (MA/HD) $4
A Dog's Way Home (2019) (MA/HD) $3.75
A Man Called Otto (2022) (MA/HD) $7.25
A Most Wanted Man (2014) (Vudu/HD) $3.50
A Quiet Place (2018) (Vudu/4K) $4.50 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $1.50
A Quiet Place Part II (2020) (Vudu/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Abominable (2019) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) $6.25
About Time (2013) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5.25
Addams Family 2 (2021) (iTunes/4K) $5.50
Adrift (2018) (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad (1949) (MA/HD) $5.75 (GP/HD) $4.25
Aladdin (1992) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $3.25 (GP/HD) $2.25
Aladdin (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.25 (GP/HD) $1.50
Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day (2014) (MA/HD) $4.75
Alice Through the Looking Glass (2016) (MA/HD) $5.50 (GP/HD) $4
Alien (1979) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5
Alien Collection 1-6 (MA/HD) $19.50 1-4 (MA/SD) $9
Alita: Battle Angel (2019) (MA/4K) $5.50 (MA/HD) $4
All is Lost (2013) (Vudu/HD) $4
Allied (2016) (iTunes/4K) $4.50 (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Almost Famous (2000) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.25
Alpha (2018) (MA/HD) $4.25
Amazing Spider-Man (2012) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.50
Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Ambulance (2022) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4
American Assassin (2017) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3
American Gangster (Extended Edition) (2007) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $6.25
American Made (2017) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $4.25
American Sniper (2014) (MA/4K) $6.50
Amsterdam (2022) (MA/HD) $5 (GP/HD) $3.75
Amy (2015) (Vudu/HD) $6
Anastasia (1997) (MA/HD) $6.25
Angel Has Fallen (2019) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.25
Angel Heart (1987) (Vudu/4K) $6
Anna (2019) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4.50
Annihilation (2018) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/4K) $2.50
Antebellum (2020) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.50
Ant-Man (2015) (MA/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) $5 (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2.25
Ant-Man and the Wasp (2018) (MA/4K) $8 (iTunes/4K) $6.25 (GP/HD) $3.25
Antz (1998) (MA/HD) $5.75
Apocalypse Now (3 Versions) (Vudu/4K) $6.50
Apollo 13 (1995) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $4.75
Aqua Teen Forever: Plantasm (2022) (MA/HD) $4.75
Arctic (2019) (MA/HD) $5.75
Arnold Schwarzenegger 6-Movie (Vudu/HD) $13.50
Arrival (2016) (Vudu/4K) $6.75 (Vudu/HD) $2.25 (iTunes/4K) $4
Assassination Nation (2018) (MA/HD) $4.75
Assassin's Creed (2016) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2
Atomic Blonde (2017) (MA/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) $3.25 (MA/HD) $2.25
Avengers Collection 1-4 (MA/4K) $25 (iTunes/4K) $20 (GP/HD) $7.75
Baby Driver (2017) (MA/HD) $3.75
Babylon (2022) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/4K) $6.25
Back to the Future Collection 1-3 (MA/4K) $15 (MA/HD) $7.50
Bad Boys Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $12
Bad Boys for Life (2020) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $3.50
Bad Guys, The (2022) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $4.25
Bad Times at The El Royale (2018) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $5.75
Band of Brothers (2001) (GP/HD) $3.75 No Port
Banshees of Inisherin (2022) (GP/HD) $4.50
Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar (2021) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5
Batman and Superman: Battle of the Super Sons (2022) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $4.50
Batman Year One (2011) (MA/4K) $5
Batman, The (2022) (MA/4K) $5.25 (MA/HD) $2.50
Batman: The Doom That Came to Gotham (2022) (MA/4K) $7.50
Batman: The Long Halloween Deluxe Edition (2022) (MA/HD) $6
Battle: Los Angeles (2011) (MA/4K) $6.50
Battleship (2012) (MA/4K) $4.50 (MA/HD) $1.75 (iTunes/4K) $3
Baywatch (2017) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $2 (Vudu/HD) $1.50
Beast (2022) (MA/HD) $5.75
Being John Malkovich (1999) (MA/HD) $4
Belly (1998) (Vudu/4K) $4.75
Beverly Hills Cop (1984) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4.50
Big Hero 6 (2014) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $1.50
Big Short (2015) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.25
Birdman (2014) (MA/HD) $4.75
Birth of the Dragon (2017) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.25
Black Adam (2022) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $4.25
Black Panther (2018) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $4.25 (GP/HD) $1.75
Black Panther: Wakanda Forever (2022) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $2.50
Black Widow (2021) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $3.25
Blacklight (2022) (MA/HD) $4.25
Blindspotting (2018) (Vudu/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.75
Blues Brothers + Unrated (1980) (MA/4K) $7
Bob's Burgers Movie (2022) (MA/HD) $3.25 (GP/HD) $2.25
Bodies Bodies Bodies (2022) (Vudu/4K) $6.75
Bodyguard, The (1992) (MA/HD) $5
Bohemian Rhapsody (2018) (MA/4K) $5 (MA/HD) $3.25
Bond: Skyfall (2012) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (Vudu/HD) $1
Book Club (2018) (Vudu/HD) $2 (iTunes/4K) $1
Born a Champion (2021) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.50
Boss Baby (2017) & Family Business (2021) (MA/HD) $5.75
Boss Baby (2017) (MA/HD) $1.50
Bourne Collection 1-5 (MA/4K) $25 (iTunes/4K) $19 (MA/HD) $15
Boxtrolls, The (2014) (iTunes/HD) $4.75
Brave (2012) (iTunes/4K) $6.25 (GP/HD) $4.50
Braveheart (1995) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.25 (Vudu/HD) $5
Breakfast Club (1985) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5.25
Breakfast Club (1985), Weird Science (2008), Sixteen Candles (1984) (MA/HD) $11.50
Breakthrough (2019) (MA/4K) $6.50
Bridesmaids (2011) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $3.50
Brightburn (2019) (MA/HD) $6.75
Bullet to the Head (2013) (MA/HD) $3
Bullet Train (2022) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $4.25
Bumblebee (2018) (Vudu/4K) $4.75 (Vudu/HD) $1.75 (iTunes/4K) $2
Cabin in the Woods (2012) (iTunes/4K) $2.75 (Vudu/HD) $2
Call of the Wild (2020) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $1.50 (GP/HD) $1.25
Candyman (2020) (MA/HD) $4.50
Captain Fantastic (2016) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $4
Captain Marvel (2019) (MA/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) $4 (GP/HD) $1.75
Card Counter, The (2021) (MA/HD) $5
Casablanca (1943) (MA/4K) $6.25
Case for Christ, The (2017) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50
Celebrating Mickey (2018) (MA/HD) $5.50
Chaos Walking (2021) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5
Chappie (2015) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.75
Charlie's Angels (2000) (MA/4K) $7.75
Charlie's Angels (2019) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Chasing Amy (1997) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.75
Chicago (2002) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5
Choice, The (2016) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.25
Christopher Robin (2018) (MA/HD) $5.25 (GP/HD) $4
Chronicle (2012) (MA/HD) $4.50
Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (2010) (MA/HD) $7
Cinderella III: A Twist in Time (2007) (MA/HD) $6.50 (GP/HD) $5
Clerks III (2022) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.50
Cloverfield (2008) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.75
Coco (2017) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) $5.25 (GP/HD) $2.25
Cold Pursuit (2019) (Vudu/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3
Coming to America (1988) (Vudu/4K) $4.75 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.25
Commuter (2018) (Vudu/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2.50
Conan The Barbarian (2011) (Vudu/4K) $5
Constantine: The House of Mystery (2022) (MA/HD) $3.50
Contractor (2022) (Vudu/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Courier, The (2020) (Vudu/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Crash (2004) (Vudu/HD) $5.25
Crawl (2019) (Vudu/HD) $3 (iTunes/4K) $2
Creed Collection 1-3 (Vudu/HD) $13
Creed III (2023) (Vudu/4K) $10
Croods (2013) & A New Age (2020) (MA/HD) $6.75
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2001) (MA/4K) $7.75
Cruella (2021) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $3.50 (GP/HD) $2.50
Daddy's Home 1-2 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.25
Dances With Wolves (1990) (Vudu/HD) $6
Daniel Craig Collection 5-Movie (Vudu/4K) $20
Dark Tower (2017) (MA/HD) $3
Dark Waters (2019) (MA/HD) $5.75
Darkest Hour (2017) (MA/HD) $3
Dawn of The Planet of The Apes (2014) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4
Day After Tomorrow (2004) (MA/HD) $6.75
DC League of Super-Pets (2022) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $5
Deadpool (2016) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2
Deadpool 2 (2018) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $3.25
Death on the Nile (2022) (MA/HD) $5 (GP/HD) $3.50
Deepwater Horizon (2016) (Vudu/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2.50
Dentist Collection 1-2 (1996-1998) (Vudu/HD) $5.25
Detective Knight Collection 1-3 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $15 $5.75 Each
Devotion (2022) (iTunes/4K) $6.50
Diary of a Wimpy Kid (2010) (MA/HD) $4.50
Die Hard (1988) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $4
Die Hard 1-5 (MA/HD) $16 $4.75 Each
Dirty Dancing (1987) (Vudu/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Dirty Grandpa (2016) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6
District 9 (2009) (MA/4K) $6.50
Django Unchained (2012) (Vudu/HD) $2.50
Do the Right Thing (1989) (MA/4K) $6
Doctor Strange (2016) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) $4 (MA/HD) $3.50 (GP/HD) $1.75
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $2.75 (GP/HD) $2
Dog (2022) (Vudu/HD) $3
Dolittle (2020) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $3.50
Don't Worry Darling (2022) (MA/HD) $5.50
Doors (1991) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4.50
Dora and the Lost City of Gold (2019) (Vudu/HD) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) $4.25
Downsizing (2017) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $1.25
Downton Abbey (2019) (MA/HD) $5.50
Downton Abbey: A New Era (2022) (MA/HD) $3.75
Dr. Seuss' How The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000) (iTunes/4K) $5.50 (MA/HD) $5
Dracula 2000 (2000), II: Ascension (2003) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $10.50
Dracula Untold (2014) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $2.75 (iTunes/4K) $4
Draft Day (2014) (Vudu/HD) $3.25 (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Dragged Across Concrete (2019) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.25
Dragonheart 5-Movie (MA/HD) $15
Drive (2011) (MA/HD) $4.25
Dumbo (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $5.25 (GP/HD) $2.50
Dune (2021) (MA/4K) $5.50
Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/4K) $8
Dunkirk (2017) (MA/4K) $6.50
Dying of the Light (2014) (Vudu/HD) $2.25
E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $5 (MA/HD) $3
Earth Girls Are Easy (1988) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Edward Scissorhands (1990) (MA/HD) $3
Eighth Grade (2018) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Elvis (2022) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4
Elysium (2013) & District 9 (2009) (MA/HD) $7.75
Elysium (2013) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.25
Emoji Movie (2017) (MA/HD) $2.25
Encanto (2021) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) (GP/4K) $3.50
Epic (2013) (MA/HD) $1.75 (iTunes/SD) $1.25
Equalizer 2 (2018) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $2.75
Escape from L.A (1996) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6
Eternals (2021) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3
Everest (2015) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3 (iTunes/4K) $4
Everything Everywhere All at Once (2022) (Vudu/4K) $7.50
Ex Machina (2015) (Vudu/4K) $6.50 (Vudu/HD) $4
Exodus: Gods and Kings (2014) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3
Expendables 1-3 (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Eyes of Tammy Faye (2021) (GP/HD) $4.25
F9: The Fast Saga + Director's Cut (2021) (MA/4K) $5.25 (MA/HD) $3.25
Fabelmans (2022) (MA/HD) $6.50
Fahrenheit 451 (2018) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3
Fantastic Beasts Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $7.75
Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore (2022) (MA/4K) $5.25 (MA/HD) $3
Fantastic Four (2015) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.50
Farewell, The (2019) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Fast & Furious Collection 1-9 (MA/HD) $10
Fatale (2020) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $3.75
Father Stu (2022) (MA/HD) $5.50
Fatherhood (2021) (MA/HD) $3.75
Fault in Our Stars (2014) (MA/HD) $1.75
Fences (2016) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $1.75
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $6
Field of Dreams (1989) (MA/4K) $7.50 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $6
Fifth Element (1997) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $6
Fifty Shades of Grey 3-Movie + Unrated (MA/HD) $9.75
Finding Dory (2016) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $3.50 (GP/HD) $1.25
Finding Nemo (2003) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) $5.25 (GP/HD) $3
Finest Hours, The (2016) (MA/HD) $6.25 (GP/HD) $3.75
First Cow (2019) (Vudu/HD) $6.50
First Man (2018) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4.25
Flashdance (1983) (Vudu/4K) $6.75
Flatliners (2017) (MA/HD) $4.25
Footloose (2011) (Vudu/HD) $5 (iTunes/HD) $3.50
Ford v Ferrari (2019) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $4.75
Forever My Girl (2018) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.75
Forrest Gump (1994) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Fox and the Hound (1981) (MA/HD) $6.50 (GP/HD) $5
Frankenstein (1931) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50
Free Guy (2021) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $3.25
Fruitvale Station (2014) (Vudu/HD) $4
Full Metal Jacket (1987) (MA/4K) $6.50
Fury (2014) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.50
G.I. Joe: Retaliation (2013) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Gamer (2009) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Gemini Man (2019) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2.25
Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance (2012) (MA/HD) $6.75
Ghostbusters: Afterlife (2021) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) $3.50
Girl on the Train (2016) (iTunes/4K) $2.25 (MA/HD) $2.50
Gladiator (2000) (Vudu/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5
Glass (2019) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.50
Glory (1989) (MA/4K) $7.75
Godfather Trilogy (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $14
Gods of Egypt (2016) (Vudu/4K) $5.25 (Vudu/HD) $2 (iTunes/4K) $1.50
Godzilla (1998) (MA/4K) $6.50
Good Will Hunting (1997) (Vudu/HD) $5.25
Goosebumps 2 (2018) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) $6.50
Gotti (2018) (Vudu/HD) $2
Grand Budapest Hotel (2014) (MA/HD) $3.75
Grease (1978), 2 (1982), Live! (2016) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $14
Greatest Showman (2017) (MA/HD) $2.25
Green Book (2018) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $5
Green Hornet (2011) (MA/HD) $6.50
Green Knight (2021) (Vudu/4K) $5.50
Green Lantern: Beware My Power (2022) (MA/HD) $3
Green Mile, The (1999) (MA/4K) $6
Greta (2019) (MA/HD) $5.25
Grey, The (2012) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.75
Groundhog Day (1993) (MA/4K) $8
Guardians of the Galaxy (2014) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $4.75 (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $1.75
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (2017) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) $4.25 (GP/HD) $1.25
Hacksaw Ridge (2016) (Vudu/4K) $4.50 (iTunes/4K) $3.50 (Vudu/HD) $2.25
Halloween (2018) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4.25
Halloween Ends (2022) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4.50
Halloween Kills (2021) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $4.25
Hancock (2008) (MA/4K) $6.50
Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters (2013) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Hardcore Henry (2016) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.50
Harriet (2019) (MA/HD) $4.25
Hate U Give (2018) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $4.50
Haunting in Connecticut (2009) (Vudu/HD) $6.50
Heat, The (2013) (MA/HD) $2.25 (iTunes/SD) $1
Heat: Director's Definitive Edition (1995) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $5.25
Heaven is for Real (2014) (MA/HD) $2.75
Heavy Metal (1981) (MA/4K) $6.50
Hell Fest (2018) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $3.75
Hell or High Water (2016) (Vudu/4K) $5.25 (Vudu/HD) $2.25 (iTunes/4K) $3.75
Hellboy (2019) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4.25
Hellboy (Director's Cut) (2004) (MA/4K) $6.50
Hercules (2014) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $1.50
Hereditary (2018) (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Highlander (1986) (Vudu/4K) $5
Hitman's Bodyguard (2017) (Vudu/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard (2021) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4.75
Hobbs & Shaw (2019) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $3.75
Hocus Pocus (1993) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $2.25
Holmes And Watson (2018) (MA/HD) $3.75
Home (2015) (MA/HD) $2
Home Alone 1-2 (MA/HD) $7.50
Hope Springs (2012) (MA/HD) $2.50
Hostiles (2017) (Vudu/4K) $4.75 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.25
Hotel Mumbai (2019) (MA/HD) $5.25
Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation (2018) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4.50
House of 1,000 Corpses (2003), Devil's Rejects (2005), 3 From Hell (2019) (Vudu/HD) $6
House of the Dragon: Season 1 (2022) (Vudu/4K) $9 (Vudu/HD) $5.50
House with a Clock in Its Walls (2018) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $3.75
How to Train Your Dragon (2010) (MA/4K) $6.50
How to Train Your Dragon Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $7.50 $4.75 Each
How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $4.25
Howard the Duck (1986) (MA/4K) $7
Hunger Games Collection 1-4 (Vudu/HD) $6 (iTunes/4K) $12
Hunt for Red October (1990) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4.50
Hunter Killer (2018) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2.75
Hurt Locker (2008) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.25
Hustle, The (2019) (iTunes/4K) $2.75
Hustlers (2019) (iTunes/4K) $3
I Feel Pretty (2018) (iTunes/HD) $1
I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry (2007) (MA/HD) $4
I See You (2019) (iTunes/HD) $2.50
I, Frankenstein (2014) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $1.75
I, Tonya (2017) (MA/HD) $5.75
If I Stay (2014) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Imitation Game, The (2014) (Vudu/HD) $3.25
Immortal Life Of Henrietta Lacks (2017) (iTunes/HD) $3.50
In the Heights (2021) (MA/4K) $5
Incredible Hulk (2008) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $5.25
Incredibles (2004) (MA/4K) $7.75 (iTunes/4K) $6.25 (GP/HD) $4.75
Incredibles 2 (2018) (MA/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2
Independence Day (1996) (MA/4K) $7.75 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5.50
Indiana Jones 1-4 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $20
Infinite (2021) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5
Inglorious Bastards (2009) (MA/4K) $7
Inside Out (2015) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $4.25 (GP/HD) $1.50
Instant Family (2018) (Vudu/HD) $2 (iTunes/4K) $1.50
Insurgent (2015) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4.25 (Vudu/HD) $3.50
Interstellar (2014) (Vudu/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $5.75 (Vudu/HD) $4
Invisible Man (2020) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.75
Iron Man (2008) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $7 (GP/HD) $3
Iron Man 1-3 (MA/4K) $21 (iTunes/4K) $16 (GP/HD) $7.50
Iron Man 2 (2010) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $6.50 (GP/HD) $3
Iron Man 3 (2013) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $3 (MA/HD) $2.25 (GP/HD) $1.50
Iron Man and Hulk: Heroes United (2013) (MA/HD) $5.50
It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World (1963) (Vudu/HD) $6.75
It's a Wonderful Life (1946) (Vudu/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5
Jack and Jill (2011), Just Go with IT (2011) & That's My Boy (2012) (MA/SD) $9
Jack Reacher Collection 1-2 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $7
Jack Reacher: Never Go Back (2016) (Vudu/4K) $5.50 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2.75
Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit (2014) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.25
Jackass Forever (2022) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4
Jaws (1975) (MA/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.75
Jaws (1975) Jaws 2 (1978) Jaws 3 (1983) Jaws: The Revenge (1987) (MA/HD) $15.50
Jexi (2019) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4.50
Jigsaw (2017) (Vudu/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2
JOBS (2013) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.75
John Wick Collection 1-3 (Vudu/4K) $16.50 (iTunes/4K) $14.50 (Vudu/HD) $8
John Wick: Chapter 3 - Parabellum (2019) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4
Judy (2019) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $3.75
Juice (1992) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.50
Jumanji (1995) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $6
Jumanji: Next Level (2019) & Welcome to the Jungle (2017) (MA/HD) $7.50
Jumanji: The Next Level (2019) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $5.50
Jumanji: Welcome To The Jungle (2017) (MA/4K) $5.50 (MA/HD) $2 (MA/SD) $1
Jungle Book (1967) (MA/HD) $6 (GP/HD) $4
Jungle Book (2016) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5.25 (GP/HD) $2.75
Jungle Book 2 (2003) (MA/HD) $6.50 (GP/HD) $5.50
Jungle Cruise (2021) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $3
Jurassic Park (1993) (MA/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (MA/HD) $3
Jurassic Park III (2001) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (MA/HD) $3.50
Jurassic Park: The Lost World (1997) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (MA/HD) $3
Jurassic World (2015) (MA/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (MA/HD) $2.75
Jurassic World Collection 1-5 (MA/4K) $20 (iTunes/4K) $17.50 (MA/HD) $10
Jurassic World Collection 1-6 (MA/4K) $23.50 (MA/HD) $11.50
Jurassic World: Dominion + Extended Cut (2022) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.25
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $1.75
Justice League x RWBY Super Heroes and Huntsmen Part One (2023) (MA/HD) $4
Justice Society: World War II (2021) (MA/4K) $5.50
Kick-Ass (2010) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50
Kid Who Would Be King (2019) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $4.75
Kid, The (2019) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.25
Killing Kennedy (2013) (MA/HD) $6.50
Kin (2018) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3
King Kong (2005) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (MA/HD) $3.50
Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.75
Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.25
Knight and Day (2010) (MA/HD) $6.50
Knives Out (2019) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.25
Kung Fu Panda Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $12.50
La La Land (2016) (Vudu/HD) $2.25 (iTunes/4K) $3.75
Lady and the Tramp (1955) (MA/HD) $5.75 (GP/HD) $3.75
Last Duel, The (2021) (MA/HD) $5.25 (GP/HD) $4
Last Night in Soho (2021) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $5.75
Last Witch Hunter (2015) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $1.50
Last Word (2017) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $4.75
Law Abiding Citizen (2009) (Vudu/4K) $7
Legion of Super Heroes (2023) (MA/HD) $5.50
Leprechaun Collection 1-7 (Vudu/HD) $14
Les Miserables (1998) (MA/HD) $7
Life of Pi (2012) (MA/HD) $2.50
Lightyear (2022) (MA/4K) $5 (MA/HD) $2.75 (GP/HD) $2
Lilo & Stitch (2002) & Stitch Has a Glitch (2005) (MA/HD) $10.50 (GP/HD) $6
Lincoln Lawyer (2011) (Vudu/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Little (2019) (MA/HD) $4.50
Little Mermaid (1989) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5.75 (GP/HD) $3.75
Live Die Repeat: Edge Of Tomorrow (2014) (MA/4K) $6.50
Lock Up (1989) (Vudu/4K) $5
Logan (2017) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.75
Lone Ranger (2013) (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2.50
Lone Survivor (2013) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) $2 (MA/HD) $1.50
Looper (2012) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $3
Lord of War (2005) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.50
Lost City, The (2022) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6
Love and Monsters (2020) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $7
Luca (2021) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $3.25
Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile (2022) (MA/HD) $5.50
Mad Max Collection 1-4 (Vudu/4K) $20
Madagascar Collection 1-4 (MA/HD) $14
Magnificent Seven (2016) (Vudu/4K) $6 (Vudu/HD) $2.50
Maleficent (2014) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3 (GP/HD) $1.25
Maleficent: Mistress of Evil (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (GP/HD) $1.75
Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again (2018) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $1.75
Man on a Ledge (2012) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.50
Marry Me (2022) (MA/HD) $6.50
Marshall (2017) (MA/HD) $4.75
Martian - Extended Cut (2015) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $5.25
Martian (Theatrical) (2015) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $3.25
Mary Poppins Returns (2018) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2
Matrix: Resurrections (2021) (MA/4K) $5
Maze Runner (2014) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5.50
Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials (2015) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $6
Mechanic: Resurrection (2016) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3
Megan Leavey (2017) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $1.75
Memory (2022) (MA/HD) $3.50
Men (2022) (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Men in Black (1997) (MA/HD) $6.50
Men in Black 3 (2012) (MA/HD) $2.50
Men in Black Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $15.50
Men in Black II (2002) (MA/HD) $6.75
Menu (2022) (MA/HD) $5.50 (GP/HD) $4
MIB: International (2019) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $4.75
Mickey & Minnie 10 Classic Shorts - Volume 1 (2023) (MA/HD) $5.75 (GP/HD) $4
Midway (2019) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4
Mile 22 (2018) (iTunes/4K) $1.75
Minions: The Rise of Gru (2022) & Minions (2015) (MA/HD) $8
Minions: The Rise of Gru (2022) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $5.25
Miss Bala (2019) (MA/HD) $3.75
Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children (2015) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2
Mission: Impossible Collection 1-6 (Vudu/4K) $25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $20
Mission: Impossible Fallout (2018) (Vudu/4K) $2.75 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2.50
Moana (2016) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $2
Moneyball (2011) (MA/HD) $2.75
Monster Hunter (2020) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4.25
Monsters University (2013) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) $5.75 (GP/HD) $3.50
Monty Python's The Meaning of Life (1983) (MA/4K) $7.25
Moonfall (2022) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5
Moonlight (2016) (Vudu/HD) $4
Moonrise Kingdom (2012) (MA/HD) $4.75
Morbius (2022) (MA/4K) $5.25 (MA/HD) $3.25 (MA/SD) $2.25
Mortal Engines (2018) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $3.25
Mortal Kombat Legends: Snow Blind (2022) (MA/HD) $5.50
Mother's Day (2016) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5
Mr. Peabody & Sherman (2014) (MA/HD) $3.25
Mulan (1998) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) $5.75 (GP/HD) $3
Mulan (2020) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $2.25
Mulan 2 (2005) (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $2.75
Mummy, The (2017) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.75
Muppets Most Wanted (2014) (MA/HD) $6.25 (GP/HD) $4.50
Murder on The Orient Express (2017) (MA/HD) $2.75
My Boss's Daughter (2003) (Vudu/HD) $6
My Little Pony: The Movie (2017) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.25
National Lampoon's Animal House (1978) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $5.25
Natural, The (1984) (MA/4K) $5
New Mutants (2020) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $5.25 (GP/HD) $2.75
News of the World (2020) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $3.75
Night at the Museum 3-Movie (MA/HD) $13.50 $6 Each (MA/SD) $9
Night School (Extended) (2018) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $3.75
Nightmare Alley (2021) (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
Noah (2014) (Vudu/HD) $1.75 (iTunes/HD) $1.50
Nope (2022) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $5.75
Nope (2022), Get Out (2017) & Us (2019) (MA/HD) $10
Northman (2022) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $4.50
Notting Hill (1999) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.75
Now You See Me 1-2 (Vudu/HD) $4 (iTunes/HD) $6.50
Nut Job (2014) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $1.75
Nutcracker and the Four Realms (2018) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $3 (GP/HD) $2.50
Oblivion (2013) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) $3.50 (MA/HD) $2.25
Office Space (1999) (MA/HD) $7
Once Upon A Time... In Hollywood (2019) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $5
One Direction: This is Us + Extended Fan Edition (2013) (MA/HD) $3.25
Only The Brave (2017) (MA/HD) $5.50
Onward (2020) (MA/4K) $5.50 (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $2.25
Operation Finale (2018) (iTunes/4K) $2.75
Ouija (2014) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Our Kind of Traitor (2016) (Vudu/HD) $3.25
Overlord (2018) (Vudu/4K) $5 (Vudu/HD) $2.75 (iTunes/4K) $4
Oz the Great and Powerful (2013) (MA/HD) $2 (GP/HD) $1
Pacific Rim Uprising (2018) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $4.50
Parasite (2019) (MA/HD) $4.75
Passengers (2016) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $2.75
Paterno (2018) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.25 (GP/HD) $2.75
Patriot Games (1992) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.50
Patriots Day (2017) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2.50
Paul, Apostle Of Christ (2018) (MA/HD) $4.50
Paws of Fury: The Legend of Hank (2022) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $6
Peanuts Movie (2015) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.25
Pearl (2022) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Penguins of Madagascar (2014) (MA/HD) $2.75
Pet Sematary (1989) (Vudu/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $4 (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Pet Sematary (2019) (Vudu/4K) $4.25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2.50
Pete’s Dragon (2016) (MA/HD) $6.25 (GP/HD) $4.25
Peter Pan (1953) (MA/HD) $6.25 (GP/HD) $4.75
Peter Pan: Return to Neverland (2002) (MA/HD) $6 (GP/HD) $4.50
Peter Rabbit (2018) & 2 (2021) (MA/HD) $8.50 $4.75 Each
Peter Rabbit (2018) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $4.75
Philadelphia (1993) (MA/4K) $7.75
Pineapple Express (Unrated Edition) (2008) (MA/HD) $6.50
Pitch Black - Unrated Director's Cut (2000) (MA/HD) $6
Pitch Perfect (2012) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $2.75 (iTunes/4K) $3.75
Pitch Perfect Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $11.50
Pixels (2015) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Planet of the Apes 1-3 (Newer) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $12
Power Rangers (2017) (Vudu/4K) $5.50 (iTunes/4K) $3.25 (Vudu/HD) $2.75
Precious (2009) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $6.25
Predator (1987), 2 (1990), Predators (2009), Predator (2018) (MA/HD) $11
Predator (2018) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $3.50
Pretty in Pink (1986) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.75
Prey for the Devil (2022) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6
Priceless (2016) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $5
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016) (MA/HD) $6.50
Prophecy Collection 1-5 (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $14.50
Protege, The (2021) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.75
Proud Mary (2018) (MA/HD) $4.25
Psycho (1960), Rear Window (1954), The Birds (1963), Vertigo (1958) (MA/4K) $17
Pulp Fiction (1994) (Vudu/4K) $5.50 (Vudu/HD) $4.25 (iTunes/HD) $5.25
Punisher, The (2004) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (Vudu/HD) $5.25
Punisher: War Zone (2008) (Vudu/4K) $5.75
Purge, The (2013) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3
Purge: Anarchy (2014) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.75
Puss in Boots (2011) (MA/4K) $6.75
Queen of Katwe (2016) (MA/HD) $3.50 (GP/HD) $2.50
Raid 2 (2014) (MA/HD) $5.75
Raid: Redemption + Unrated (2012) (MA/HD) $5.75
Rambo Collection 1-5 (Vudu/HD) $12.50
Raya and the Last Dragon (2021) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2.50
Ready or Not (2019) (MA/HD) $6.25
Red (2010) (Vudu/4K) $6.25
Red 2 (2013) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $1.50
Red Sparrow (2018) (MA/HD) $4.50
Replicas (2019) (Vudu/4K) $5.50
Requiem for a Dream - Director's Cut (2000) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.25
Rescuers, The (1977) (MA/HD) $6.50
Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (2017) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $3.25
Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City (2021) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.50
Revenant, The (2015) (MA/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3.25
Rhythm Section (2020) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Richard Jewell (2019) (MA/4K) $6.50
Riddick Collection 1-3 (Unrated) (MA/HD) $14
Ride Along 1-2 (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5 $2.75 Each
Rings (2017) (Vudu/HD) $2.75 (iTunes/HD) $1.50
Rise of the Guardians (2012) (MA/HD) $3.25
Robin Hood (2010) (MA/4K) $6.25
Robin Hood (2018) (Vudu/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.25
RoboCop (2014) (Vudu/HD) $2
Rocketman (2019) (Vudu/4K) $4.75 (iTunes/4K) $2.50 (Vudu/HD) $2.25
Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) (MA/HD) $5.25
Rogue (2020) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $3.50
Roman J. Israel, Esq. (2017) (MA/HD) $3.50
Ron's Gone Wrong (2021) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $5.25 (GP/HD) $3.50
Rookie of the Year (1993) (MA/HD) $7.50
Room (2015) (Vudu/HD) $5
Rough Night (2017) (MA/HD) $4.25
Rumble (2022) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Run Lola Run (1998) (MA/HD) $6.50
Same Kind of Different as Me (2017) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2
Sandlot, The (1993) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5
Saturday Night Fever (1977) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.25
Sausage Party (2016) (MA/HD) $4.75
Savages (2012) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $2.25
Saving Private Ryan (1998) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.50
Saw (2004) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.50
Saw Collection 1-7 (Vudu/HD) $10
Scarface (1983) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5.25
Scary Movie 3 (2003) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4
Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark (2019) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $3
Schindler's List (1993) (MA/HD) $4.75
Scott Pilgrim vs. The World (2010) (MA/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $5.25
Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse (2015) (Vudu/HD) $3.75 (iTunes/HD) $2.75
Scream (1996) (Vudu/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Scream 5 (2022) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Scream Collection 1-3 (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $13.50
Secret Headquarters (2022) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/4K) $6
Secret in Their Eyes (2015) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.25
Secret Life of Pets 2 (2019) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $5
Selma (2015) (Vudu/HD) $3 (iTunes/HD) $2.25
Serenity (2005) (MA/HD) $3.50
Seriously Red (2022) (Vudu/HD) $6.75
Shack (2017) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $1.50
Shallows, The (2016) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD $4
Shang-Chi (2021) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $3
Shape of Water (2017) (MA/HD) $3.25
Shaun of the Dead (2004), Hot Fuzz (2007), World's End (2013) (MA/HD) $10
Shawshank Redemption (1994) (MA/4K) $6
Shazam! Fury of the Gods (2023) (MA/4K) $10
Sherlock Gnomes (2018) (Vudu/HD) $2.75 (iTunes/4K) $2.25
She's the Man (2006) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.25
Shutter Island (2010) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.50
Sicario (2015) (Vudu/4K) $6 (Vudu/HD) $1.75 (iTunes/4K) $3
Sicario: Day of the Soldado (2018) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $3.75
Silent Night, Deadly Night: 3-Film Collection (1989-1991) (Vudu/HD) $6
Sin City (2005) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Sing (2016) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.75
Sing 2 (2021) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.50
Sing Collection 1-2 (MA/HD) $6
Singin' in the Rain (1952) (MA/4K) $6.50
Skyscraper (2018) (MA/4K) $5.25 (MA/HD) $1.75
Sleeping Beauty (1959) (MA/HD) $3.50 (GP/HD) $2.50
Slender Man (2018) (MA/HD) $5.25
Smile (2022) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/4K) $6.75
Smokey and the Bandit (1977) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.75
Smokin' Aces (2007) (iTunes/4K) $5.75
Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs (1937) (MA/HD) $6 (GP/HD) $3.75
Snowden (2016) (MA/HD) $3.50 (iTunes/HD) $4
Snowman (2017) (MA/HD) $2.75
Sonic the Hedgehog (2020) (Vudu/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (2022) (Vudu/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Sorry to Bother You (2018) (MA/HD) $4.75
Soul (2020) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $2.25
Source Code (2011) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6
Space Jam (1996) (MA/4K) $5
Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021) (MA/4K) $5
Sparkle (2012) (MA/HD) $3.50 (MA/SD) $2.25
Speed (1994) (MA/4K) $5.25
Spider-Man (2002) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Spider-Man 2 (2004) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Spider-Man 3 (2007) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Spider-Man Collection 1-8 (MA/HD) $26
Spider-Man: Far From Home (2019) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $4
Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $1.75
Spider-Man: Into The Spider-Verse (2018) (MA/HD) $5.25
Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $3.75
Spiral (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.50
Spirit Untamed: The Movie (2021) (MA/HD) $4.25
Split (2017) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.75
SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water (2015) (Vudu/HD) $4.75 (iTunes/HD) $3.50
Spotlight (2015) (MA/HD) $5 (iTunes/HD) $3
Spy Who Dumped Me (2018) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Star Trek 1-3 (Vudu/4K) $18 (Vudu/HD) $9.50 (iTunes/4K) $13.50
Starship Troopers (1997) (MA/4K) $6.50
Stir of Echoes (1999) (Vudu/HD) $4.75
Straight Outta Compton (Unrated Director’s Cut) (2015) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Strange World (2022) (GP/HD) Ports to MA $4.25
Studio 666 (2022) (MA/HD) $6.75
Suburbicon (2017) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.25
Suffragette (2015) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $3
Suicide Squad, The (2021) (MA/4K) $5
Sully (2016) (MA/4K) $6.50
Sum of All Fears, The (2002) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.75
Super 8 (2011) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (Vudu/HD) $3.25 (iTunes/4K) $5
Super Buddies (2013) (MA/HD) $5 (GP/HD) $3.50
Super Troopers 2 (2018) (MA/HD) $3
Survive the Night (2020) (Vudu/4K) $4 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3
SW: A New Hope (1977) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) $6.25 (GP/HD) $3.50
SW: Empire Strikes Back (1980) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) $6.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
SW: Force Awakens (2015) (MA/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) $3.50 (GP/HD) $1
SW: Last Jedi (2017) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (GP/HD) $1
SW: Phantom Menace (1999) (MA/4K) $7.50 (iTunes/4K) $6.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
SW: Return of the Jedi (1983) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $6.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
SW: Revenge of the Sith (2005) (MA/4K) $7.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
Taken Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $9
Tangled (2010) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $5 (GP/HD) $3.75
Teen Titans Go! & DC Super Hero Girls: Mayhem in the Multiverse (2022) (MA/HD) $4.75
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.25
Ten Commandments (1956) (Vudu/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $4.25
Terminator: Dark Fate (2019) (Vudu/4K) $6.50 (Vudu/HD) $3 (iTunes/4K) $2.50
Terms of Endearment (1983) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5
Think Like a Man (2012) & Two (2014) (MA/HD) $9
This Is The End (2013) (MA/HD) $5
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $3.25 (GP/HD) $2
Thor: Ragnarok (2017) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3.50 (GP/HD) $1.75
Thor: The Dark World (2013) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2.25
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri (2017) (MA/HD) $3.50
Till (2022) (iTunes/4K) $6.50
To Kill a Mockingbird (1962) (MA/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/HD) $4.50
Top Five (2014) (Vudu/HD) $4.75 (iTunes/HD) $3.50
Top Gun (1986) (Vudu/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Top Gun: Maverick (2022) (Vudu/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Total Recall (1990) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.25
Tower Heist (2011) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $3.75
Toy Story 1-4 (MA/4K) $23 (iTunes/4K) $21 (GP/HD) $11.50
Training Day (2001) (MA/4K) $6.50
Transformers 1-5 (Vudu/4K) $30 (Vudu/HD) $23
Transformers: Last Knight (2017) (Vudu/4K) $4.75 (iTunes/4K) $2.25 (Vudu/HD) $2
Transporter, The (2002) (MA/HD) $6.25
Trolls Collection 1-2 (MA/HD) $6
Trolls World Tour (MA/HD) $5.50
Turbo (2013) (MA/HD) $2.25 (iTunes/SD) $1.25
Turning Red (2022) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $2.75
Umma (2022) (MA/HD) $4.75
Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent (2022) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.75
Unbreakable (2000) (MA/4K) $6 (GP/HD) $3.75
Uncharted (2022) (MA/4K) $5.50 (MA/HD) $3.25
Uncle Drew (2018) (Vudu/4K) $6.25 (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3
Uncut Gems (2019) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Underworld: Awakening (2012) (MA/HD) $1.75
Underworld: Blood Wars (2016) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $2.25
Unforgiven (1992) (MA/4K) $6.50
Untouchables, The (1987) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6
Us (2019) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $5.25
Van Helsing (2004) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.75
Venom (2005) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50
Venom (2018) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $3.25
Venom: Let There Be Carnage (2021) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $3.50
Vertigo (1958) (MA/HD) $4.75
Vice (2018) 'Christian Bale' (MA/HD) $4.25
Victor Frankenstein (2015) (MA/HD) $5.75
Vivo (2021) (MA/HD) $4
Vow, The (2012) (MA/HD) $3.50
Voyagers (2021) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.50
Walk, The (2015) (MA/HD) $4.75
Walking Dead: Season 11 (2021) (Vudu/HD) $6
Walking with Dinosaurs (2013) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Wallace & Gromit in the Curse of the Were-Rabbit (2005) (MA/HD) $6.75
Wanted (2008) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $6
War Dogs (2016) (MA/4K) $6.50
War for the Planet of the Apes (2017) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3
War of the Worlds (1953) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.75
Warcraft (2016) (MA/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.25
Warm Bodies (2013) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2
Warrior (2011) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/HD) $4
Waterworld (1995) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $6
Wayne's World (1992) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.25
Welcome to Marwen (2018) (MA/4K) $4
West Side Story (2021) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) (GP/HD) $2.50
When the Bough Breaks (2016) (MA/HD) $4.50
Where the Crawdads Sing (2022) (MA/HD) $4.50
Where'd You Go Bernadette (2019) (MA/HD) $5.50
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (2016) (Vudu/HD) $2.75 (iTunes/HD) $2
White Boy Rick (2018) (MA/HD) $5.25
Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance With Somebody (2022) (MA/HD) $5.75
Why Him? (2016) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2
Widows (2018) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $1.75
Wild Card (2015) (Vudu/HD) $4
Willow (1988) (MA/HD) $6.75
Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971) (MA/4K) $5.25
Wizard of Lies (2017) (Vudu/HD) $5 (iTunes/HD) $4.25 (GP/HD) $3
Wolf Man (1941) (MA/4K) $6.50
Wolf of Wall Street (2013) (Vudu/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.50
Woman in Gold (2015) (Vudu/HD) $2.75
Woman King (2022) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Wonder (2017) (Vudu/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3
Wonder Park (2019) (Vudu/HD) $3 (iTunes/4K) $2.25
Wonder Woman 1984 (2020) (MA/4K) $5
Woodlawn (2015) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.75
Wraith, The (1986) (Vudu/HD) $5
X (2022) (Vudu/HD) $6.75
X-Men (2000), X2 (2003), X-Men: The Last Stand (2006) (MA/HD) $15
X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009) (MA/HD) $7
X-Men: Dark Phoenix (2019) (MA/HD) $6
X-Men: Days of Future Past (2004) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.50 Rogue Cut (MA/HD) $5
X-Men: First Class (2010), Days of Future Past (2004), Apocalypse (2014) (MA/HD) $11
Zootopia (2016) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $5 (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3.25
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2023.06.03 03:20 Drakolf The Graveyard of Faith:
The enemy I cannot kill is my best friend, thus my God is my only true friend.
It had happened an age ago, when the Apostates sought to bring about the destruction of the Gods- and won. Temples were burned and demolished, any historical importance was ignored in favor of preventing them from ever returning.
They paraded the divine corpses throughout the realm, draining them of their blood, forging weapons of such terrible power, that their war against the faithful nearly destroyed the world.
I still wore the vestments of my temple, the armor granted to me by my God. It was part of me, as my sword was a part of me, as my arm was a part of me. With a thought, I could dispel both, blend in with the crowd, escape the notice of the militant apostates who ruled with a far crueler hand than even the most black-hearted of deities.
I quietly preached the truth of my order: "The only way to reach our God is through an act of unfathomable violence, and though I know he is dead, I march ever onward to kill my God."
We had been seen as madmen, professing our God as powerful, yet we clamored to one day be worthy of fighting him, and killing him, for that is what he decreed.
They called it the Graveyard of Faith, the rotting corpses of benevolence and wickedness in equal measure putrefying the air. I marched onward, knowing the deathly miasma would eventually kill me. I walked without hesitation, I would live to kill my God, or I would die a weak man.
And there, shriveled up as a husk, was the corpse of my God.
I spoke no words, I dredged up every hateful feeling I had wielded, every sorrow I had borne, and I allowed it all to slip through my fingers. Release from my burdens was a relief, yet I still had a duty.
I plunged my blade into the heart of my God, and it was torn from my body, as though it were my arm. I fell to my knees, weeping, for I had committed the gravest sin before my God.
To throw away my sword, to sever it from my body.
"Oh, Blade of Justice, I have come to slay you, to grant you one last honor, even as your corpse rots before me!" I cried out. "In this, my final act of faith, I commend myself to you, even though the void would consume me!"
I reached out a hand and touched the rotting flesh before me, before settling upon his hand and waiting to die.
Yet, there was a tremor, the faintest of movement. I quickly stood up, uncertain what could be moving- yet in those dead eyes I saw the faintest glimmer of Glory, and I knew what my duty was.
"Arundal! I am Erik, the last Blade of your Temple. If this death is ignoble, then fight me! I will need only my two thumbs to slay you!"
As embers to a flame, the Glory flared up, the God grasped the sword between his fingers, sliding it out without so much as a change in expression, and rose up as a puppet on strings.
"I, who have mastered the art of cutting, who has mastered the art of not cutting, who lives and breathes before you. I shall kill you as is my right!"
Righteous anger twisted the face of my God, and so with the blade of my heart I cut at him, slicing through his desiccated flesh down to the bone. With righteous fury. I did not wait for him to stand, ruthless slaughter before an enemy was but a precursor to meeting him, and so I sliced and cut, raking the air with my fingers, each movement a slash against his body.
He stabbed me through with my own sword, and I chuckled. I refused to die, and would continue to live until I was successful, I would sooner die a horrific death to ensure my memories lived on.
And so I died, my torso removed from my legs, the blood already flowing too fast to stop. My sword was dropped upon me, and I knew its power would fade along with my life.
And so I died, yet I was not consigned to the Void, my God made my body whole once more, and laid my soul within.
"IT IS NO TIME FOR FRIVOLITY. OUR ENEMY IS NUMEROUS, AND YOU ARE A LEGION UNTO YOURSELF." My sword returned to my hand, and I understood.
I needed to gather my faithful, and we would march to war.
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2023.06.03 03:18 NotNiko15 Modern Cosmic Horrors chapter 2
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Chapter 2: In Inertia
In this chapter I took inspiration from a very creative venlil who decided to remain anonymous
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Memory Transmission Subject: Kos, Venlil Civilian
Date [Standardized Human Time]: July 12 2136
It happened in a fraction of a second.
I was on my ship, traveling FTL in a subspace. I served as a captain of an interplanetary transporter Fertility. On board I carried loads of green fruits destined for a venlil colony where they meant to ripen upon arrival. Now they were exploding from the vacuum.
My very ship was torn into pieces within an instant. There was no time for my brain to process what happened. I braced myself for a slow death. I felt the oxygen leaving my vessel and temperature dropping rapidly. I felt pain in my chest.
Death… never came to me. I remain seated in my chair and the pain begun to subside. I watched as inertia took hold of my cockpit, lifting everything around me. The sight was bewildering, but I still don’t know why I wasn't suffocating. I released my harness and floated out of the room. Behind the doors was a dark hallway. The power was long gone so I decided to walk straight instead of trying to breach the doors in the darkness. At the end of a hallway, I reached an intersection. Only one of these tunnels had a light at the end, which was the way I chose.
Was this the afterlife? Was I dead, about to meet the creator? I was wondering as I floated through the tunnel. The light was just a reflection of what’s behind a corner. When I peeked, I saw that the entire vessel was torn in a half. The further corridor was abruptly cut by a precipice. I could even see the generator room that wasn’t spared by a sweeping force. I drifted across the ship, awestruck by the surreal scene. It was when I noticed that I had full control over the direction of my floating in inertia, which was against the laws of physics, more akin to out of body experiences.
And so I found myself suspended between two halves of my ship, unable to fathom the reason for this purgatory state. I lived a good life. I wandered out to open space, to try and see my ship in full. I noticed another object lingering close to my ship. It was a wreck of what looks like a space buoy. It collided with my ship, which means I was torn out of subspace before that.
Was that an FTL disruptor? It started working a moment before I passed through it. That was the best theory I could have thought of. I decided to investigate the buoy to test my hypothesis. The hull of the buoy had imprinted lettering in venlang.
MADE ON VENLIL PRIME
The name of my homeworld did not give any answers. I needed to look further. I tried to check behind the hull of my ship and I was met with an immense pain in my paw. It was illuminated by this system’s star. I pulled my hand behind the hull and hugged it, trying to ease the pain. Even after hiding in the shadow of a shipwreck, the pain was so unbearable, it was clawing on my senses.
I felt tears accumulating around my eyes, they were also affected by inertia, rendering my vision blurry. I returned to my cockpit. There was nothing rational in this place. I just wanted to see my family and friends. Whatever deity rules this universe, I was pleading for their mercy. The void remained indifferent.
When my feelings calmed, I began to think of my crew. They were still on this ship. I went to look for them on the other half of the vessel. Behind the precipice was a maze of corridors. A faint beam of light penetrated through the broken hull at the starboard side of my ship. It means that any illuminated area was off limits. Most of my crewmates must have been ejected, because I only found someone at the stern. It was my FTL engineer, Qualen. He was pale from freezing and suffocating. His eyes were popping out of the sockets, and his mouth expressed a pure terror. I wondered where his soul could go, or be. Maybe he didn’t die yet. Perhaps I was the first to die, and time passed unbearably slowly for the rest.
I returned to my cockpit resigned. I decided to wait for something to happen or to think of some bright idea. None of it ever came. I only noticed more anomalies. The objects that floated in inertia were now frozen in time. Even Qualen’s body wasn’t moving across the corridor. I started experimenting with the new laws. I threw an object and watched as its momentum was decelerating. Everything was trying to reach the frozen-in-time state. A thought came to me, that I am in fact Faster Than Light, and the entire world has come to halt. If that was true, then why was the starlight so painful?
I went exploring the front part of the ship. Despite being engulfed in darkness, the sun was my enemy now. I’ve reached the front sleeping quarters, which were reserved for the highest rank personnel, including captain. I’ve found a journal on a shelf. I returned to the cockpit to use the remaining light to read it. The journal belonged to Vesen, the first officer. I couldn’t find her anywhere. Maybe her body was floating in a dark room, or she was engulfed by the rays of the star and I couldn’t reach her. Maybe she was ejected and she disappeared forever. I decided she wouldn’t mind if I read through her journal.
Most pages contained a standard overview on Fertility’s state. Fuel, food, water, oxygen, power, crew. In the middle Vesen started writing more personally.
“Day 7 [July 10 2016]
I’ve read thoroughly through the crewmates’ dossier. There are individuals acting strange. I have seen the rations shrinking slightly faster than in the past 7 days. Even the social meetings were dropped more rarely, or very late. Those are the tiny hints for something bad. There is a predator disease developing on Fertility. I couldn't find it without commissioning a brain scan, so I had to guess based on the dossier.
There was one individual with an uneasy past. The FTL engineer Qualen was caught in a ln arxur invasion on one of the colonies. He barely survived and escaped by hiding in an unexplored by exterminators forest. He was hiding among wild predators, until the arxur took every survivors as a cattle. I am positive that Qualen was afflicted with predator disease after that time, and now he's spreading that behavior among the oblivious crew. In a meantime i must isolate him until we return to Venlil Prime”
I was shocked after reading this. Qualen had a predator disease? I have known him for many years, he couldn't possibly be dangerous. He was like a brother to me! His name would have been cleared if we ever reached civilization and brain scanned him.
But then again, he was the only other venlil who wasn't ejected from Fertility. Is he the reason I can not rest? It must be, there's literally nothing else on this shipwreck!
I have realized the purpose of this place. It’s a judgment. The sun was an instrument of execution, like a flamethrower for exterminators. I have to incinerate the body of a predator diseased crewmate before I can finally reach peace. The danger keeps me trapped from eternal rest, I have to burn it! I rushed out of the cockpit and reached the familiar precipice.
And I froze. The frame of the hull on the other side was lit by a star, locking me out of the stern. The rays were slowly traveling towards me. It made no sense! Everything was supposed to be frozen in time, but we are still orbiting around the system! I have returned to a dark hallway to gather my thoughts. I had to cross the precipice and burn the body of Qualen, but to do this I need to walk through hell itself. The alternative was to wait until the sun passes me unnoticed. I could not see any good spot to hide, as the ship was full of reflective surfaces. Both choices are equally risky but I chose the first option. It would be a problem if the chance I had was also time sensitive.
I returned to the great crack and took a good look at the spotlit surface of the corridor. I mimicked taking a deep breath for good luck and launched.
I felt like I was boiled in water, when I dived into the starlight. Whatever I tried to do on my most primal instincts, I was thrown out to square one, and even now the pain did not abandon me. I screamed into the aether, floated erratically, anything to let the endorphins ease my suffering. It took a long time to find relief, and I remembered that I don’t possess a body anymore and no natural pain relievers are produced in my brain. The only thing that suffered was my very soul.
When I returned to the precipice, I saw the starlight was already licking on my part of a ship. In no time I will be caught by dawn. I thought of going outside of my ship, while I still could. The reflective interior couldn’t be safer than the vast space. But I still could not outrun the starlight. I would be hiding in an umbra of Fertility. If I stray too far, I will be caught in penumbra. More than that, I couldn’t expect it, there are no reference points in space.
It was too late to do anything now. There was only one thing to test. The starlight might be an absolution. Maybe if I’m engulfed in it, I will be able to find the real afterlife. Absolution was not a concept from the venlilian faith, but again I can not think of any religion where the star smolders the soul of the wronged. Whenever I wanted to test it or not, the rays were approaching through the reflective walls of the hallways. I returned to the cockpit to wait for my fate. I thought of just closing the doors, but the electricity could not work and I was in inertia, I had no way to grapple and pull the doors together manually. I could only sit in my seat and wait.
What if there’s no good ending for me? If the star was an act of extermination of a soul, only a predator hell was awaiting me. Will I suffer for nothing forever? Will the souls of predators eat me until I stop existing? Will they keep eating me until the end of time? Or maybe they acknowledge me as one of them, as I could also have predator disease? Do predators even have souls? I was caught in a stream of thoughts as the starlight was closing in. I launched to the furthest corner, buying as much time as I can. I didn’t think the reflections even allowed the light to reach me. It seemed like the starlight was approaching me no matter what. If that’s the case, wouldn’t they reach Qualen’s body as well?
I had to stop that thought, as I was out of time for pondering. I took another nonexistent breath, closed my eyes and tensed all my muscles.
It was impossible to describe the agony I felt at that moment. My impulses forced me out to the center of the room, and my entire body was exposed to the scorching force of the star. My very soul was screaming out of my control and I was torn out of my mind. I lost my vision and heard ringing in my ears from the noise of my own throat.
Soon the blurry vision returned to me, but I was still screaming in pain. Through the pain I saw I was in a completely different room. There was a spotlight above me, and the walls were dim. I was laying on a bed that felt like it was made of cracked concrete. Everything that touched my body and the light itself was painful. Even the ungroomed hair was piercing through my skin. I heard a hum in my head, coming from a translation implant. There was someone in that room speaking an alien language. The figure appeared in my range of vision. It was tall and wearing a coat. It said that the others will come in a quarter of a paw, and that everyone was expecting me for a long time.
It came closer and I felt numbness as I deciphered the face of a blurry figure. It had front-facing eyes! IT WAS A PREDATOR! It truly must be a predator hell! I tried to move, back off, run! But my entire body was heavy. It felt like I hadn’t slept in a whole life. All my limbs, tail and neck were completely exhausted! The pain could not mellow either. I was trapped in a painful reality, awaiting to be tortured forever! The monstrum said that I must not worry about anything and allow my body to rest. It finally introduced itself
as a human.
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2023.06.03 03:09 FoAm_solo-1137 Speaker
06 escape. I can’t seem to find the speaker size for the front passenger door. The part number from ford is 18808a, but doesn’t say what size. Anyone know what size will fit?
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2023.06.03 03:01 Saturdead The Many Deaths of the Six-Door House
I’ve been waiting to talk about this. I’ve been looking for others with similar experiences, or… I dunno. Maybe I hoped I was insane. Months have passed, and I still don’t have the slightest idea what to believe. But no matter what is true and what isn’t, the memory of what happened to me is as true as can be.
And every time I put my hand to a door, I tremble.
I was looking for a house in the surrounding area. I know, being a homeowner at 27 seems like a dream. I know I’ve been fortunate. Even so, I wanted something remote, spacious, and comparably cheap.
I’d been looking for something nearby, but everything even close to a larger city quickly ran out of my price range. It wasn’t until I started looking at the rural outskirts that I started to see something realistic.
I’d been to four open house showings in the past week when I came across an ad that looked too good to be true. Another open house, but this one was just perfect. Apparently, they were looking to make a quick sale after a previous deal had fallen through.
I made my way to a small nearby town called Tomskog. There was a little billboard with a blue sunflower greeting me, and I took a hard right down a street named “Sunplenty Road”. There were only five houses there, and the one I came to look at was at the far end. Even from a distance, I could tell I wasn’t the only visitor.
I parked on the street outside and took in the sights. There was an “Open House” sign outside, again with the sunflower logo. There was a separate garage, and the house itself was smaller than expected. Homely, but small.
I was greeted by a cheerful man. He had thick glasses, a receding hairline, and the kind of “fun uncle” smile that told me he could get away with anything.
“Come on in,” he said. “You’re gonna love it.”
There was me, the realtor, and three other people. A middle-aged couple, and a younger woman. She had this messy black hair that kept poking her in the eye. Even at a glance I could tell the young woman was distraught. She wasn’t even looking around the house, she seemed more interested in the people wandering about.
The house had a simple and open layout. The bottom floor had a bathroom, a separate study room, an adjoining kitchen, and a lounge area. There were stairs leading to a sort of catwalk on the second floor, making the main room wide open. The second floor had another bathroom, a bedroom, and a guest room.
It had this sort of sullen 70’s vibe with grey and white flower-patterned wallpaper. There were little scuffs and tears pretty much everywhere, but the house itself seemed… fine.
The realtor, Anders, showed me all the details of the kitchen. He assured me that most of the appliances were to be replaced before the next homeowner moved in, and proudly displayed the new garbage disposal. It was a nice enough setup, but I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the young woman standing outside the study. I got the feeling that she was standing guard.
As the middle-aged couple walked downstairs, they asked her they could have a look.
“No,” she answered, with a shrug. “You can’t.”
“Don’t mind her,” Anders the realtor smiled. “Of course you can.”
“No,” she insisted. “They can’t.”
Anders walked up to her and leaned in. His demeanor shifted. They argued back and forth, and I could hear her repeat, over and over;
“This is not what we agreed to.”
The middle-aged couple and I just looked at one another. While the realtor and the young woman argued, we introduced ourselves. I smiled and gave them my name. They were named Helen and Sebastian, or ‘Seb’ for short. Typical midwestern salt-of-the-earth kind of people. They were suffering from an empty nest and seemed to want a place to start over. They made no secret about being interested in the place, although Helen wasn’t sure about having no direct access to the garage. Seb, on the other hand, wasn’t sure about the soil. He wanted a proper garden, and the soil seemed ill-fit to sustain greenery.
“Still,” Helen smiled. “Best place we’ve seen so far.”
“Sure is,” added Seb, giving Helen a little shake.
Anders kept arguing with the young woman. I could overhear her name as Whitney, and she was not willing to cooperate. Finally, Anders just pushed past her, putting his keys in the lock.
“Right this way, we’ll just take a quick peek.”
“We’re not done in there,” she said. “You can’t just-“
“It was supposed to be packed up, Whitney. I can’t help that you’re late.”
“That’s not… please. Give me an hour.”
“You’ve had plenty of hours.”
He clicked the door open and pushed it in. The three of us gave Whitney an apologetic look as we stepped inside.
The study was a mess. Old clothes strewn across various furniture, loose papers and books haphazardly thrown across a musky desk. An entire wall of bookshelves full of textbooks, ranging from discrete mathematics to philosophical physics. I stood there for a few seconds, taking it all in. Whitney pushed past us, grabbing an empty box from the floor.
“Don’t touch anything,” she sighed. “Just… look at it, and leave.”
Anders leaned over to us, lowering his voice.
“You have to excuse her,” he whispered. “There were some… complications, with the former owner.”
“Oh, she’s… the, uh, the daughter?” Seb asked.
Anders nodded.
While Anders told us about the east-facing windows and the top-of-the-line air conditioning system, I couldn’t help but to keep my eyes on Whitney. She was rummaging through the desk, dropping mementos, pictures, and notebooks into one of her many cardboard boxes. I could tell she was sleep deprived. She kept yawning.
Helen seemed eager to just leave Whitney to her grieving, while Seb kept to the practical details. He checked the hardwood floor, the insulation on the windows, the wall linings for pests. At one point, he almost knocked over a coffee table, and Whitney came running. She caught a vase that was about to topple off the table.
“Don’t… don’t touch anything!” she cried out. “Just… if you have to be here, stay… stay still!”
“I’m, uh… sorry,” Seb said. “I was just-“
“Just go over there!”
She waved her hands around, shaking the vase. There was a little rattle coming from it.
She shook it again, and I could see the color fade from her cheeks. Carefully, she tipped the vase, and something dark plopped into her hand.
A large bronze key.
Whitney pulled her hand back, letting the bronze key clatter to the floor. She covered her mouth, forgetting how to exhale. We just looked at her having what seemed, to us, like a mental breakdown.
“Nobody move,” she gasped. “Nobody… do anything.”
We all just stood there. Helen and Seb barely breathed, and I was suddenly hyper-aware of how still my feet were. Anders wasn’t impressed. If anything, he was fed up with this. He rolled his eyes, and picked up the key.
“Whitney, I’m sorry, you’re gonna have to wait outside.”
“Please, put… put that down.”
“You can put it with your things and take it outside.”
“Just… don’t move, you don’t know what you’re-“
Anders opened the door, stepped out of the study, and headed straight for the front door. Whitney dropped everything and ran after him. The rest of us followed suit.
“Wait!” she called out. “Please wait!”
As soon as Anders put his hand on the front door, Whitney stopped dead in her tracks.
“Anders, please, I’m sorry,” she said. “Just step away. Give me the key. I’ll leave, I promise. I swear.”
“That’s enough of that.”
“No!”
He opened the door and took a step forward. The bronze key passed the threshold.
We’d all stepped into the main lounge by now, and I heard the door to the study slam shut. There was a sort of pressure shift, making the wind move through the main lounge. Every door in the house slid shut with a click. All except the front door, which was wide open.
But there was nothing there.
Not nothing as in no one standing there. No, nothing as in “a nothing”. Just a blank, black space.
A viscous fluid where sunlight ought to be.
Endless, abyssal, ocean.
I stared at it, mesmerized. The contrast of the bright sun coming in from the windows, bouncing off the ripples of this deep ocean doorway.
And there, in the dark, humanoids. Tall, elongated silhouettes.
Anders stepped back, but it was as if parts of him refused to move. His arms were locked in place, seemingly by an invisible force. And as he stepped back, something started pulling him in.
His limbs grew long and twisted. His knees bending and snapping at impossible angles. His scalp pulled backwards, the loose skin of his face revealing the bottom white of his eyes.
“He… help!”
It was all he managed to say, as he was pulled into the dark. Limbs were quietly ripped from his sockets, as his human frame was bent, twisted, torn, and mangled. Black water mixing with marrow as dark shapes turned Anders into what resembled an underwater cloud of flesh and cloth.
Whitney threw herself forward, slamming the door shut, leaving the bronze key on the floor.
Screams erupted, and I didn’t even notice they were mine. It was this primal force being pulled out of me, this need to scream. Like a baby desperate for her mother. Helen backed into a corner and sunk to the floor, with Seb trying his best to comfort her. Whitney just sat there looking at the bronze key; her face breaking out in cold sweats.
I felt something turn in my stomach and headed for the bathroom. Whitney ran after me, but she couldn’t make it in time. I burst through the bathroom door and collapsed on the floor, hyperventilating. Whitney stayed outside, looking at me in shock.
“It’s… you’re… you’re fine,” she said. “You’re okay.”
I wasn’t. But compared to Anders, panicking on the bathroom floor seemed like a mercy.
Whitney stayed with me as I calmed down. Seb and Helen joined us. After a few minutes of silence, Whitney excused herself. She came back with pile of notebooks. She sat down across the hall from me, making sure not to enter the bathroom.
“My dad, he… found something,” she said. “I wasn’t sure exactly what.”
“We should… we should leave,” said Helen. “We should leave right now.”
“We can climb out a window,” said Seb. “If the, uh… the door is…”
“Just… please,” sighed Whitney. “Just stay. We’ll figure it out.”
“I-I mean no offense,” said Helen. “But what… what on earth was that?”
Whitney turned the notebook to a specific page and read aloud.
“I’ve been marooned in this house for thirty days. I never know where the Door is. Sometimes I can hear water, sometimes not. I tried the windows, but it nearly burst my eardrums from the pressure as water came rushing in. I can’t leave. I can’t move. They wait behind the Door. They wait for me to open.”
Whitney scratched her head. Helen looked back and forth, as if waiting for something to make sense. Seb just shook his head.
“What… what does that even mean?” asked Helen. “What happened?”
“It has to do with the doors,” Whitney explained. “They wait behind the Door.”
“There’s nothing there,” said Seb. “There’s light coming through the windows.”
“It’s… it’s not that easy. It’s when you open it.”
“That doesn’t make any sense.”
Whitney stood up and handed Helen three notebooks.
“We can argue the details of dad’s quantum entanglement experiment later, but that’s not gonna help us.”
“So… let’s just go then,” said Seb. “Let’s leave.”
“You wanna take your chances on the front door? That it won’t come back? Go ahead.”
Seb took a few tentative steps up to the front door. Helen wanted to protest, but she just started looking back and forth. Whitney crossed her arms and turned away.
“I can’t hear anything,” said Seb. “Are you sure it’s there?”
“It’s somewhere,” said Whitney. “I don’t… I don’t know the rules. It has to do with the doors.”
I got up off the bathroom floor and looked at them. Seb took his hand off the front door and stepped back. Whitney turned her attention to me.
“You put yourself at risk,” said Whitney. “That could’ve killed you.”
“The bathroom?”
“The door to the bathroom. Any or all of these doors, it… it could be connected. Here, let me-“
Whitney walked up to Helen and took one of the notebooks back. She turned to one of the latter pages.
“The framework of passageway. Concept of thought. Paired in alignment, the darkness standing shy from the mirrored back of Empyrean. Realm unwilled and unbound, misshapen by collective subconscious. We cannot pass, our world-forgotten blocks dissipated. Like a bridge cannot be built of water, and a house cannot be built of wind. But the great craftsman blames not their tools; and eternal gold can be found in humble bronze.”
“Bronze,” I said. “Like the key.”
“Look, my dad, he… we weren’t on speaking terms. I’ve looked at all this for days, and all I can tell is that he was off his rocker. He died in that room.”
Whitney pointed to the study. Helen hugged Seb tight, holding back a sob.
“He couldn’t leave. He was convinced that the… the door would eat him.”
Helen sat down by the kitchen table. Thankfully, there was no door in-between the kitchen and the main lounge. Seb walked straight up to Whitney, grabbed her by the collar of her blouse, and slammed her up against the wall; his calm demeanor cracking at the seams.
“We shouldn’t be here,” he said. “This is your fault!”
“I-I didn’t know! It was all just ramblings! I didn’t have time to clear it all out, how… how could I have known?!”
“You recognized the key,” said Helen. “You chased after him. You asked him to wait.”
“That’s the only part that keeps coming back!” Whitney yelled. “Check the notebooks! The key, it’s… it’s everywhere! It’s everything!”
“So what do we do?” Seb asked. “Do we use it or destroy it?”
Whitney looked at the pile of notebooks she’d managed to gather from the study. It was only a handful of everything we’d seen in there, but it might be enough to get some semblance of an answer.
The house had six doors. The front door, the bathroom door, the study room door. On the top floor, there was another bathroom door, a door to the guest bedroom, and the main bedroom door. The bathroom door on the bottom floor was already open and considered safe. I could step in and out without a problem.
Whitney explained as best as she could.
Her father had grown increasingly paranoid since divorcing Whitney’s mother. He’d locked himself in his house, committing fully to his studies. He’d always been a bit agoraphobic, and having a reason not to leave the house was a bit of a blessing in disguise. But over time, that blessing turned into a curse. An early entry read;
“For years, I’ve longed for the presence of mind to devote myself. And now that I can, I find myself wanting. I can’t be certain. There is a Door, a passage. It binds itself seemingly spontaneously. There is a risk involved, and it is a risk I cannot take.”
Seb tried to call for help, but water started pouring out of his phone. Whitney found a page about “semi-passages” or “shortcuts”. Things that could be used as portals to another person or place. They weren’t as conceptually clean as a door, and thus wouldn’t invite “Them”, but the connection would go through that dark place. The place that, somehow, her father had stumbled upon.
I looked at the key for a long time. I didn’t dare to touch it. It was unassuming, in a way. It was old and had this sort of blocky texture; like it was made of little squares. While Helen and Seb rifled through notebooks, Whitney looked up and talked to me.
“He just wanted a way to go wherever he wanted, without having to traverse the space in-between. To just go from one door to another. All he needed was a key.”
“But why now? Why is… how are we trapped?” I asked. “We got in here just fine.”
“The realtor,” sighed Whitney. “He tried to leave with the key. I think that triggered it.”
“So how do we un-trigger it?”
Whitney shrugged and pointed to the notebooks.
We had endless discussions. We compared notes, drew out theories. Helen thought we could force the bronze key out a window, but Whitney theorized that it’d just leave us locked inside. I suggested we listened at each door, just to eliminate which ones were safe and which weren’t. We tried, but there was seemingly no way to tell. Sometimes I could hear rushing water on the other side. Scratches on the wood. Other times, nothing. Even going back to the same door, it’d sound differently each time.
We considered opening several doors at once. We spread ourselves out. I was at the upstairs bedroom door, right next to Seb by the guest room door. Whitney was downstairs by the study door, and Helen insisted on the front door. We all put our hands on the handles. I wasn’t sure if I could hear something on the other side or not; my heart was pounding too loudly.
There were six doors. Five were closed, one open. Someone was probably going to die.
“There is only ever one Door. He only speaks of it as a singular. It can change over time,” said Whitney. “This is our best shot.”
“We can’t know for sure,” said Seb. “And why do we even want to open them all? There’s nothing in the bedrooms, right?”
“We’re excluding,” I said. “Like we did with the downstairs bathroom.”
“We should close it,” said Helen. “Shouldn’t that improve our chances of… of our other doors being okay?”
“I have no idea,” sighed Whitney. “Are we doing this?”
Seb backed away from his door, taking the hand off the handle.
“It ain’t right,” he said. “None of it. It ain’t right.”
Everything erupted into an argument. Seb couldn’t bring himself to risk his life for anything less than an exit, and Helen couldn’t stop crying at the thought of that dark abyss. I couldn’t blame her. To this day, I can’t stop imagining it. Whitney, trying to act as a voice of reason, read aloud from one of the notebooks.
“The concept of the passageway, the Door, changes at the flick of a thought. An alien thought, like an invisible, uncontrollable shadow of the psyche. It refuses to be controlled. My exit could be my end; or as likely, a wooden frame. Much like we cannot control the smoke of a campfire, we cannot foresee the turning of the passageway.”
We all looked at one another. Helen collapsed by the front door, crying. Whitney was close to a mental breakdown. I felt this enormous burden settle in my stomach, like I was missing something.
“Let’s take the door off the hinges”, said Seb. “We’ll turn it into a… an arch. Then it ain’t a door anymore. You think that’ll work?”
“In theory, maybe,” said Whitney. “But how do we do that without opening it?”
“We’ll… we’ll take the whole frame off,” Seb said. “There’s a crowbar under the sink. Saw it when I checked the garbage disposal.”
Helen bent down next to the sink, put her hand on the kitchen cabinet handle. I gasped.
Was that considered a door? Could it kill her? Would it?
I imagined that dark, cold abyss. That enormous force pulling me in, turning my very form into this unrecognizable mass. Where no screams can be heard. All I’d have to show for such unimaginable anguish would be a burst of bubbles; then nothing.
“No!” I cried out. “Stop!”
But it was too late.
Nothing happened. Helen opened it, pulled out the crowbar, and that was that. But for a brief moment, I realized how Whitney’s father must’ve felt. That uncertainty, not knowing for sure if that one flick of the wrist would be damnation; or nothing.
Helen handed the crowbar to Seb, while Whitney gave me a pat on the shoulder. I couldn’t stop crying. My whole body was shaking from the sudden rush of adrenaline. Meanwhile, Seb walked up to the front door and started tapping the wood.
The theory was this; if there was no door, nothing could come through. There was no point in doing a test run, because if it didn’t work, someone would lose their life either way. It was better to have an honest chance of getting out.
Whitney gathered towels. She had this idea that, maybe, water might start leaking if the door was turned into a semi-passage, like a window. If so, we might have to find a way to quickly stop the flow.
By the time we got the towels, Seb started working on the door frame. As that first crack rang out, I heard a click.
The front door slid open.
Without a moment’s thought, Seb pushed it close. It had barely opened an inch.
We all held our breaths. We were fine. Nothing was happening.
“It’s… it’s clear!” Helen called out. “There’s nothing there! I saw it, it… it was nothing!”
“It can change!” Whitney yelled back. “We can’t take that risk again!”
“Like hell we can’t.”
Seb put his hand on the front door, but Whitney tackled him. The crowbar fell to the floor as Helen rushed forward to help.
“Listen!” Whitney yelled. “Just listen!”
A rumble, like a great whale passing in the distance. It was right there; on the other side of the front door.
Without a word, they all stood up and backed away. The door shook from the passing force. Something was definitely there.
“Then… then the rest should be fine,” said Seb. “We can get to the study.”
Whitney nodded, and the two of them burst into a sprint. Helen wasn’t convinced, but didn’t know what to say. Whitney dropped her crowbar, and as she bent to pick it up, Seb opened the door to the study.
Darkness.
“…no.”
Panic exploded. Helen grabbed his arms, trying to pull him out. Whitney crawled backwards, closing her eyes and covering her ears. I couldn’t watch. All I heard was Helen, screaming his name, over and over. There was a gargle. A scream turning into an inhuman screech, like a burning pig.
“Sebastian!” Helen kept repeating. “Sebastian! Sebastian!”
There was a click, and then nothing but crying. I looked up to see Helen collapsed against the study door. It had slid shut from the pressure on the other side.
“I’m… I’m coming, Sebby,” she cried. “I’m… I’m-“
She opened the door again.
And there was the study, just as we’d left it.
Helen collapsed on the floor, curling up into a fetal position. She kept making this child-like yowling, scratching the surface of the hardwood floor, as if trying to dig Seb back into reality. But there was nothing left. Not even water droplets on the floor.
Then there were her arms. She’d held on until the door had slammed shut. Her sleeves were torn, and her arms bloody. Not much, but there were these round little suction marks. They were already bruising, with spots of blood poking through the skin.
I sat by Helen as Whitney started rifling through the study. There were more notebooks, more theories, more diaries. Notes about experiments, clever tricks, and attempts. So far, every idea to understand the rules were in vain. We couldn’t make sure. No matter what, we could never be truly sure.
Two open doors. Four closed.
I don’t know how many hours passed. I managed to get Helen to the couch, but she was inconsolable. She could barely comprehend words anymore. She didn’t blink, and she could barely breathe. There were no coherent thoughts in her mind, just… darkness. This awful, soul-sinking darkness.
Whitney propped up the open doors with books and towels, to make sure they wouldn’t accidentally close. All the while, she kept trying to convince herself.
“We keep opening them one by one,” she said. “If we can get it to manifest in one single place, and keep that door open, we should be able to leave by another.”
The sun had started to set outside. For all intents and purposes, this still just looked like a house. The windows were clear, showing the greenery outside. Maybe it was all a lie. Maybe none of it was really happening.
But looking down at Helen, and her unblinking eyes, I knew it was the realest thing I’d ever experienced.
“We… there’s three of us,” I said. “Four doors. We can’t make it.”
“No, that’s perfect,” nodded Whitney. “That’s… we open all but the front door. It manifests. Then we can get out through the one safe remaining door.”
“Unless we all die. There’s nothing that says it can only be in one place.”
“It is implied,” said Whitney. “If you got a better plan, just tell me. But unless you want to starve to death, we gotta-“
“Starve?” I interrupted. “Is that what…”
I looked back at the study, where Whitney said her father had died. No words were necessary. She took a deep breath and nodded.
“He couldn’t bring himself to try,” she said. “So we have to ask ourselves what we want. A long but certain death, or a violent risk at life?”
The fridge, the freezer, and all the cupboards had been cleared out. Whitney found some raisins for us to share while we pondered what to do. Helen couldn’t eat. She stared blankly ahead, waiting for her mind to come wandering back.
It was dark outside. Whitney rolled the bronze key between her fingers.
“I wonder how he did it,” she sighed. “He never made any sense to me.”
“Maybe it doesn’t make sense,” I shrugged. “At least not to us.”
“Then what made him so special?”
“Well, he did have a lot of books,” I said, reaching into a pile we’d gathered from the study. “Just look at some of these.”
“Astrology of Abraham, Channels of Esoteric Geometry…”
“I like this one,” I said, holding up a little red book. “Diary of Emmett Rask.”
“Right. But it doesn’t beat the…”
Whitney pulled out another book from the pile, turning it over.
“… the thirteen faiths of the blameless mother.”
I shook my head, looking over at Helen. A handful of raisins slipped between her fingers. She didn’t even bother closing her hand.
Looking back at Whitney, I sighed.
“You’re right,” I said. “We have to try.”
So we did.
We lined ourselves up on the top floor. Helen on the far right, near the bathroom. I was on the far left, by the guest room. Whitney was in the middle, by the bedroom. Helen didn’t understand. She just mimicked us.
“We’re gonna open on three,” said Whitney. “And no matter what we see, just run. Run downstairs, and just… go. Get out.”
I nodded. Helen didn’t.
“One.”
I tightened my grip. I saw Helen follow my lead, giving me an exhausted look. She could barely keep her eyes open.
“Two.”
I started doubting which way to turn the doorknob. I’d turned a million doorknobs throughout my life, but that was the first time I’d really thought about which way to turn it. I imagined myself hearing water. Bubbles. Distant rumbles. I tried telling myself that it was all imagined. Fake. Tricks of the mind.
But in my heart of hearts, I knew it wasn’t.
“Three.”
We opened our doors.
All I saw was a well-made bed. A bag of toiletries; probably Whitney’s. I left the door open and turned around.
Helen was smiling as the darkness welcomed her.
“Come on!” Whitney screamed. “Leave her!”
The door to the bedroom was open. Clear. But I was standing just ten feet away from an endless abyss. Helen looked at it, as if searching for something. She touched the surface with an outstretched hand.
“Seb, honey,” she cried. “Sebby, please.”
A pulse shot through her. I could see the hair on her arm stand up. Her veins turning black.
“Oh, Sebby…”
In an instant, her flesh unraveled as it flayed itself from the inside out. Her scream stifled as something pulled her in, leaving splotches of blood behind from the outline of her feet. A pained moan escaped her; only to be turned to harmless bubbles in the pressurized void.
Whitney grabbed me by the neck and pulled me downstairs. We ran to the front door. We looked back a final time, just to make sure it was still manifested upstairs.
It was still there. We’d sacrificed Helen, but we’d make it out.
Whitney pulled the front door open – and stopped.
Darkness.
We’d been wrong.
Whitney turned to run as an impossibly long arm grabbed the flesh of her back; straight through her clothes. It pulled her back.
I crawled away, not being able to close my eyes.
“Help me!” she cried out. “For God’s sake fucking help me!”
I shook my head, not knowing what to do. I’ll never forget those desperate eyes. The betrayal. The pleading. She fought every inch of the way. She dug her nails into the hardwood floor. She kicked. She pulled. She screamed. But for every second she stayed, the more painful it was.
With a final snap, the fingers dug into her spine; folding her like a lawn chair.
A lifeless body, dragged across the floor. Unceremoniously pulled into the dark with a quiet squelch.
And the door, slightly damaged by Seb and his crowbar, slid shut.
I was all alone.
The door to the guest bedroom and the main bedroom remained open. There was the bathroom and study downstairs. Just two closed doors left; the bathroom and the front door. Both closed. Both… wrong.
There was no right answer.
I must’ve stayed there for days. I found some trail mix in Whitney’s bag. I had water. I could shower. I had a change of clothes. I scoured the notebooks over and over and over, trying to find the slightest hint on what to do. There had to be some way of knowing for sure. There had to be.
It wasn’t until I came across a final note that I realized it was over. It read;
“By will alone, we cannot make ourselves right. Right is right, independently of our actions and intentions. We cannot control that which never was, and we cannot be part of that which will never be. There could be no more perils for me to face, and yet, I cannot bring myself to leave. There is no certainty in the unknown, and I choose not to live by chance alone.”
I cried myself to sleep at night. I banged on the walls. I even tried opening a window, only to have my left eardrum blown out from the pressure drop. Got a nasty nosebleed as well.
I tried reading. I tried making up little worlds in my head. I imagined myself safe and sound.
But it was useless. In those final hours of desperate loneliness, I knew I couldn’t fool myself any longer.
I was going to die.
I found myself with my hand on the front door. I learned every crease of the wood. The temperature of the metal handle. I listened to it. Studied it. At times, it was quiet. At other times, it wasn’t. Sometimes I imagined it quiet, other times, I imagined voices coming from the other side.
Maybe I wasn’t imagining it.
Finally, I grasped the bronze key. Starving, exhausted, and mentally broken – I opened the front door.
Sunshine.
And there, on the fresh-cut lawn, was another realtor.
Just as confused as I was.
So, turns out I was only in there for about 16 hours total. And to this day, no one seems to remember neither Anders, Seb, Helen, or Whitney. According to every document I can find, the owner of the house had no children. The cars parked outside were unregistered. On paper, it seemed like the entire world had forgotten that these people were ever part of this plane of existence.
I don’t think anyone’s lying here. There was a sincere disbelief and confusion to every piece of my story. To onlookers, I seemed like a squatter that’d gone insane.
I’ve tried to find anything about this. They won’t let me go back to read the notes. The investment firm who owns the real estate company swept it all under a rug and tore the place down. I suspect they were the ones who made the bronze key mysteriously disappear from the evidence room.
I’ve tried to find copies of the books I found in there. Some of them have been seen in passing on strange message boards, and one just keeps making my computer turn off whenever I try to google it. Who the hell is Emmett Rask anyway?
If anyone knew these people, or have heard about this phenomenon, please… I need to know I’m sane. I need to know this isn’t all a dream. I need to know I won’t wake up with my hand on that front door, having imagined living a life back outside.
This has to be real. I am real. There is nothing on the other side of the door.
Go ahead, listen. There’s nothing there.
It can’t be.
Can it?
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2023.06.03 01:59 kylexyz001 23 [M4F] [Relationship] Ohio/Worldwide- Let's Be Each Other's Everything (Longest post ever?)
Brace yourselves, this is gonna be a long one.
Table of Contents
1…… The Main Goal
2…… What I’m Seeking
3…… Personality
4…… Interests
5…… Physical Characteristics (with pics)
6…… Expectations of You
7…… Living Situation
8…… Deal Breakers
9…… Closing Remarks
(1)
The Main Goal:
Well if you’re browsing this subreddit then much like me, you were alone this weekend and I’m sure you’d like to change that as much as me. I won’t lie, I am going through a rough part of my life right now. It’s difficult for me to find the energy for anything at the moment and I’m just really seeking affection in general, anything that will give me a push. I don’t want to be that person who brings everyone down but I could really use someone to talk to right now. I’d really like to find someone who’s similar to me so much to the point that we do everything together and talk about everything while not having to pretend to be interested. I want someone with whom we can mutually spew our emotions onto and have those feelings reciprocated. Not an emotional punching bag, but an emotional teddy bear to hug and cuddle until everything feels better as many times as we need. There’s people who I’m sure have told you the same, they’ll be there no matter how many times you need the support, no matter how many times the insecurities and bad thoughts come back but they don’t mean it. I will be the exception, I’m not so ignorant to think some nice words and tales of relating to you will magically forever heal whatever ails you then get mad when you seek the same support again. Mental ailments are rarely temporary and I don’t care about someone because they’re perfect, caring about someone means being there no matter how many times they need you to be. It doesn’t feel like a chore, it doesn’t get old, and it never will.
(2)
(2.a)
What I'm Seeking:
I will upfront let you know if I’m clicking better with someone else or if you’re the one, I’m not here to tread the sea of fish or keep my options open, I’m here for one singular person.
(2.b)
Relationship:
A relationship is difficult for me right now, it’s been nearly half a year since I got out of my last relationship and the reasons for it ending are partially responsible for how I’ve been feeling and why it’s so hard for me to seek the comfort I so desperately crave. I will tell you about it but for the sake of not treating the entirety of the internet as my therapist, it’ll be in private. I really need the comfort of intimacy and the warmth of someone who cares. I'm not going to feel better if I just sulk and don’t move on. This is my attempt to get better, I’ll admit I’m not great right now and I don’t expect you to be either. If we can help each other heal, then I’d be more than happy :) A relationship isn’t just being there for when someone’s at their best. Even if a relationship is hard at the moment, I do want a life partner and I don’t want to be alone. Things aren’t going to get easier without you so I don’t want to hesitate. I view my other as an equal, I don’t like categorizing us into specific roles. We take care of each other and treat each other how we like to be treated, whatever that is, it's as simple as that. I don't care if you're "successful" or not, living simple lives with our days filled with love is the ultimate measure of success to me.
(3)
Personality:
(3.a)
On the Surface:
As you can tell I can be rather… stoic but that’s largely due to my current stressors, I truthfully am goofy and fun loving but I just can’t find it in me right now. I want to return to that but without someone to light up my world it’s been difficult to just have fun and enjoy stuff. I’m definitely more introverted, you won’t catch me at any parties or really outside at all. I definitely prefer being home though the occasional outing is not out of the question and one day I’d like to travel to other countries because I think that kind of perspective is important.
(3.b)
The Core of My Being:
I like being a spectator to it all and if we bear witness to humanity burning or its miraculous recovery, I want to watch it with you. I enjoy watching humanity advance, less so when it devolves but I want to watch it to the end nonetheless. I’m both a realist and someone who lives with my head in the clouds dreaming of scenarios or worlds that don’t exist. I’m saying that I enjoy a good narrative and can suspend my disbelief to enjoy something but you won’t catch me refusing vaccines or ignoring blatant facts for the sake of some pseudo science or witch doctor’s remedy. I’m an atheist but I do not rule out existence after death, not because I’m agnostic but because due to the nature of potentially infinite time at some point after how many googol years with a googol amount of 0s after that, something’s bound to replicate your consciousness perfectly at some point. It’s actually a really fascinating topic I like talking about. If infinite time and infinite possibilities exist, does non existence exist? Though that’s an awfully existentially dreadful thought process considering the ramifications of infinite existence and infinite possibilities during said infinite existence. I would say I’m confidently left leaning and I don’t think I could truly get along with anyone right leaning, at least America’s definition of right leaning. Left and right seems to have just become; do people deserve to suffer or do they deserve to live good lives? Being political is not something I expected to become but how can you not be when crimes against human rights are being passed on a daily basis and at the end of the day, everything’s political. Oftentimes I imagine the perfect moment as relaxing with my significant other playing games or cuddling in a cold room under blankets.
I value that special someone above all of the existential thoughts, the bad of the world, the good of the world, they practically become my world. So many worries wash away when I’m with them. I don’t know if that’s the defense mechanism my brain created to not feel bad 24/7 but if it is, I’m currently without it.
(3.c)
Insecurities:
I talk of philosophy and politics here but really I spend most of my time just playing games, watching stuff, and trying to not be sleep deprived. I’m also nowhere near as well spoken, heck sometimes I feel like my speech is broken. I won’t claim to be something I’m not, I sit at home while I complain about the world doing nothing about it wishing I had someone here with me. I’m not noble nor do I really want to be, I have morals I uphold but much like most other hypocrites I acknowledge that my comfortable life is built on the suffering of others without doing anything about it. Why? My sleep problems? Am I depressed? Is that why I have no energy to do anything? Do I just think nothing I could do could help? I can’t nail it down myself, maybe it’s a mix of everything, maybe I’m just a bad person. I have always told myself that if I had wealth I would help people but if I get that kind of wealth will I just become a wealth hoarder who tries to justify my riches as something I earned rather than something given to me through incredibly lucky circumstances? If I do help people is it because I’m a good person or out of guilt? Will I die alone? I feel like I drive everyone away with my clinginess, I get paranoid often and need reassurance often. It’s something I want to work on, something I’ve been trying to work on. Hearing that someone cares about me just never gets old. I value self awareness even if it’s painful.
(3.d)
Socializing:
I’m definitely a socially anxious/awkward mess, especially around strangers. I do feel a large amount of anxiety in public, people can’t tell by looking at my face since I kind of go stone faced in an attempt to block everything out but yeah you’ll notice that if we go out in public. Growing up my pediatrician said I was probably autistic, never got a formal diagnosis so that’s just great. But yeah that explains why I can’t make eye contact with people, I kinda just stare at the ground and avoid their gaze at all costs. A lot of these social struggles go away to a great degree once I know you for a bit but yeah I apologize for how terrible I am at socializing at first. Don’t let my social struggles fool you though, I love cuddling and being close with my person.
(3.e)
Sexuality:
I am a heterosexual male, though I’m not very masculine like at all. I may even be a bit feminine sometimes. Not that I believe any activity or manner of acting belongs to a gender but I don’t know how else to describe it. I’m definitely super affectionate and love it when my partner is too. I am open to dating demi people but I do have a libido so I don't think asexual would work out.
(4)
Interests:
(4.a)
Video Games:
As stated before, I do spend a lot of my time playing video games. It’s been hard lately with me having no energy but I really do want to play more games and have a good time playing them with you! I primarily play on PC though I do have a switch. I’m primarily into platform fighters, roguelikes, open world, survival, and sandbox games. As for single player story games, I enjoy watching them through twitch or youtube but for the most part I don’t play them myself. I’d watch you play them though!
Here’s a list of games we can play:
-Minecraft (Java)
-Risk of Rain 2
-Gunfire Reborn
-Roboquest
-7 Days to Die
-Phasmophobia
-Rust
-Unturned
-Bloons TD 6
-Platform fighters: Super Smash Bros. Melee, Slap City, Multiversus, Flash Party, Fraymakers
Whatever you want to play I’ll give it a shot! I will say that League bores me to death but I’ll play it for you :) I try to avoid MMOs, not because I don’t like them but because of how addicted I can get to them. I enjoy learning games in-depth so MMOs can be a fast track to addiction.
I recently got Kerbal Space Program 2 and ehhh not really worth it right now but hopefully later it will be? I’m super excited for Tears of the Kingdom! In the far off future I’m excited for Rivals of Aether 2 which is a platform fighter releasing in 2024, let me know of your most anticipated releases and I’ll see if I could play them with you!
Also I never got into FPS games but I could totally see myself playing like CoD with you or Escape From Tarkov. Any FPS really, I’m down.
I am a fan of Pokemon but with how things have been lately I don’t know how long that will last. Pixelmon is a common Pokemon mod I play for Minecraft if you want to play that! Also if I say I want to play something with you I mean it but there are often times when no matter how much I want to I'm just drained and can do little more than lay in bed so please don't think I'm making an excuse.
(4.b)
Science:
I really enjoy keeping up with the latest advances in pretty much everything, it could be biology, technology, astronomy, anything! I love seeing progression and I love talking about it! Really I could go on and on about what I’m obsessing about that day. I particularly love technology, ask me for my laptop specs I dare you. When I was little I always wanted to be a scientist of any kind but then insomnia and fear of college stuff hit me like a truck aaaand that’s the end of that dream.
(4.c)
Anime:
You got me, I like anime but I’d like to think my tastes are benign.
Here’s some of my favorites I can list from the top of my head:
- To Your Eternity
- Vinland Saga
- Spice and Wolf
- Re:Zero
- Mob Psycho
- Dr. Stone
- Attack on Titan
- Spy x Family
- My Hero Academia
- Ranking of Kings
- Demon Slayer
Okay I can go on and on but I will say I don’t like pointless fan service and the spamming of cliche anime moments. I mostly enjoy action and anything well animated if it doesn’t have a potato story. Heck Demon Slayer could be my top 3 out of season 2’s animation alone. I don’t watch slice of life often or romance but I would with you!
(4.d)
Misc:
I’m not going to go on and on about the tiniest little things when the main ones are covered but I’ll watch pretty much any show with you and anything really. I like random youtube videos that explain some kind of lore or mystery, sometimes mini documentaries too.
As for food I looove sushi and I’m a sucker for fast food. Okay and candy, definitely candy.
I used to play tennis but haven’t really had the opportunity nor friends to play it with and I’m way too socially anxious to seek it out. Also I will say that when we move to something like discord I type waaaay more casually. I’m not going to expect long paragraphs back and forth like we’re writing English papers for each other, I do enjoy long conversations but seriously don’t worry about having to put the utmost effort into every response, I just like making good first impressions I guess.
(5)
(5.a)
My Physical Characteristics:
I’m 5’8 (172cm), 128 pounds (58kg), with curly brown hair and blue eyes. I like keeping my hair long in the winter and cutting it in the summer. I’m pretty slim in general so if you’re looking for someone large, that’s not me. I don’t work out but my work is pretty physical so at least I’m not totally inactive. I don’t have the urge to work out or gain muscle but I do want to maintain my slim figure so if I start losing control of that I’ll work out. I like to keep my face shaved because I don’t think I look good with a beard/mustache so if you’re into those I apologize. I have an average amount of body hair? I’d prefer to be completely shaved but it’s easy to lose motivation with that battle, if you prefer shaved then I’d have no problem complying. Anyways here’s what I look like:
https://imgur.com/a/MZZgf2t (5.b)
My Physical Preferences:
Having physical preferences makes me feel shallow, if I could make myself not have them I would but unfortunately that’s now how that works. I don’t care if you’re shorter or taller than me and I don’t care if you weigh more or less than me. All I ask is that you’re slim-average weight. I would never ask for someone to be something I’m not. I don’t care about tattoos or piercings.**(6)Expectations of You (Relationship Only):**I am not looking for someone “exciting” or someone to “keep me on my toes” I’m not looking for someone to cater to my every whim or anything like that. I don’t care if you’re “boring” or if you aren’t “successful”. I know it’s a common thing for people to not want a “boring” relationship and to seek something argumentative or something with constant challenges but I just want to be with you. During the exciting times, the boring times, and everything in-between, all of it will be great with you! Maybe we do argue sometimes or maybe there will be challenges but that will never be something I purposefully seek out and I don’t want that to be something you seek out either. I will not play tricks on you and I will not play mind games, I expect the same from you. We all have personal measures of success we may or may not have lived up to but what I care about most is our commitment to each other. If we have each other we can get through tough times, near the ends of our lives I want us to look back and feel that this life together was worth more than anything. That’s not saying I want us to be haphazard, I don’t want us to make poor decisions for the sake of yolo and I want us to always be rational, especially with each other. I want you to be someone I can trust to make decisions and weigh the options with a level head, I’ll try my best to live up to the same for you. Most of all I want empathy, understanding, someone to feel the utmost comfort and trust in.
(7)
Living Situation:
Currently my life is pretty relaxed, I work 3 times a week as a night shift stocker. I currently live in a 2 bedroom apartment with my roommate but we’re looking to move into someplace larger by the end of the year if everything works out. The internet is weirdly great for Ohio too like I have fiber and later this year we’re supposed to be getting dedicated fiber so that’s neat. I’m not attached to Ohio so the ultimate goal living location wise is probably moving to a country that won’t send you into a lifetime of dealing with the repercussions from one medical emergency.
(8)
Deal Breakers:
Might as well make this simple and make it a list.
- Anti-vaxxers
- Unironically believing astrology
- Right wingers
- Hard drugs (occasional 420 and alcohol is fine, may even join you)
- Wanting children, there was a time when I was younger when I wanted children but with the state of the word that’s a definite no and I feel like I wouldn’t be able to handle the stress. I’d love a stress free life with as much time with you as possible.
- Homophobic
- Transphobic
- Racist
- Super Religious
- Don’t be a bigot and don’t deny facts.
(9)
Closing Remarks:
Well you made it, I was thinking that finding someone I’d be willing to put a lifetime of effort into at least required this much effort. If I think of anything more I’ll update the post. Also about timezones, it really doesn’t matter where in the world you are. I don’t have a sleep schedule and I have most of the week off from work so it really doesn’t matter.
I request that in your response you do put effort into it, it doesn’t have to be anywhere near as long as this but at least enough so I know that you read this and enough about you so I know why you saw potential compatibility. I will seriously read all of it and respond the best I can. I do also request a pic included in your response (sfw please) or one soon after we start talking to prove identity, I’ll send identity proving pics too. As long as this post is up, you can send a reply!
submitted by
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MeetPeople [link] [comments]
2023.06.03 01:58 kylexyz001 23 [M4F] Ohio/Worldwide- Let's Be Each Other's Everything (Longest post ever?)
Brace yourselves, this is gonna be a long one.
Table of Contents
1…… The Main Goal
2…… What I’m Seeking
3…… Personality
4…… Interests
5…… Physical Characteristics (with pics)
6…… Expectations of You
7…… Living Situation
8…… Deal Breakers
9…… Closing Remarks
(1)
The Main Goal:
Well if you’re browsing this subreddit then much like me, you were alone this weekend and I’m sure you’d like to change that as much as me. I won’t lie, I am going through a rough part of my life right now. It’s difficult for me to find the energy for anything at the moment and I’m just really seeking affection in general, anything that will give me a push. I don’t want to be that person who brings everyone down but I could really use someone to talk to right now. I’d really like to find someone who’s similar to me so much to the point that we do everything together and talk about everything while not having to pretend to be interested. I want someone with whom we can mutually spew our emotions onto and have those feelings reciprocated. Not an emotional punching bag, but an emotional teddy bear to hug and cuddle until everything feels better as many times as we need. There’s people who I’m sure have told you the same, they’ll be there no matter how many times you need the support, no matter how many times the insecurities and bad thoughts come back but they don’t mean it. I will be the exception, I’m not so ignorant to think some nice words and tales of relating to you will magically forever heal whatever ails you then get mad when you seek the same support again. Mental ailments are rarely temporary and I don’t care about someone because they’re perfect, caring about someone means being there no matter how many times they need you to be. It doesn’t feel like a chore, it doesn’t get old, and it never will.
(2)
(2.a)
What I'm Seeking:
I will upfront let you know if I’m clicking better with someone else or if you’re the one, I’m not here to tread the sea of fish or keep my options open, I’m here for one singular person.
(2.b)
Relationship:
A relationship is difficult for me right now, it’s been nearly half a year since I got out of my last relationship and the reasons for it ending are partially responsible for how I’ve been feeling and why it’s so hard for me to seek the comfort I so desperately crave. I will tell you about it but for the sake of not treating the entirety of the internet as my therapist, it’ll be in private. I really need the comfort of intimacy and the warmth of someone who cares. I'm not going to feel better if I just sulk and don’t move on. This is my attempt to get better, I’ll admit I’m not great right now and I don’t expect you to be either. If we can help each other heal, then I’d be more than happy :) A relationship isn’t just being there for when someone’s at their best. Even if a relationship is hard at the moment, I do want a life partner and I don’t want to be alone. Things aren’t going to get easier without you so I don’t want to hesitate. I view my other as an equal, I don’t like categorizing us into specific roles. We take care of each other and treat each other how we like to be treated, whatever that is, it's as simple as that. I don't care if you're "successful" or not, living simple lives with our days filled with love is the ultimate measure of success to me.
(3)
Personality:
(3.a)
On the Surface:
As you can tell I can be rather… stoic but that’s largely due to my current stressors, I truthfully am goofy and fun loving but I just can’t find it in me right now. I want to return to that but without someone to light up my world it’s been difficult to just have fun and enjoy stuff. I’m definitely more introverted, you won’t catch me at any parties or really outside at all. I definitely prefer being home though the occasional outing is not out of the question and one day I’d like to travel to other countries because I think that kind of perspective is important.
(3.b)
The Core of My Being:
I like being a spectator to it all and if we bear witness to humanity burning or its miraculous recovery, I want to watch it with you. I enjoy watching humanity advance, less so when it devolves but I want to watch it to the end nonetheless. I’m both a realist and someone who lives with my head in the clouds dreaming of scenarios or worlds that don’t exist. I’m saying that I enjoy a good narrative and can suspend my disbelief to enjoy something but you won’t catch me refusing vaccines or ignoring blatant facts for the sake of some pseudo science or witch doctor’s remedy. I’m an atheist but I do not rule out existence after death, not because I’m agnostic but because due to the nature of potentially infinite time at some point after how many googol years with a googol amount of 0s after that, something’s bound to replicate your consciousness perfectly at some point. It’s actually a really fascinating topic I like talking about. If infinite time and infinite possibilities exist, does non existence exist? Though that’s an awfully existentially dreadful thought process considering the ramifications of infinite existence and infinite possibilities during said infinite existence. I would say I’m confidently left leaning and I don’t think I could truly get along with anyone right leaning, at least America’s definition of right leaning. Left and right seems to have just become; do people deserve to suffer or do they deserve to live good lives? Being political is not something I expected to become but how can you not be when crimes against human rights are being passed on a daily basis and at the end of the day, everything’s political. Oftentimes I imagine the perfect moment as relaxing with my significant other playing games or cuddling in a cold room under blankets.
I value that special someone above all of the existential thoughts, the bad of the world, the good of the world, they practically become my world. So many worries wash away when I’m with them. I don’t know if that’s the defense mechanism my brain created to not feel bad 24/7 but if it is, I’m currently without it.
(3.c)
Insecurities:
I talk of philosophy and politics here but really I spend most of my time just playing games, watching stuff, and trying to not be sleep deprived. I’m also nowhere near as well spoken, heck sometimes I feel like my speech is broken. I won’t claim to be something I’m not, I sit at home while I complain about the world doing nothing about it wishing I had someone here with me. I’m not noble nor do I really want to be, I have morals I uphold but much like most other hypocrites I acknowledge that my comfortable life is built on the suffering of others without doing anything about it. Why? My sleep problems? Am I depressed? Is that why I have no energy to do anything? Do I just think nothing I could do could help? I can’t nail it down myself, maybe it’s a mix of everything, maybe I’m just a bad person. I have always told myself that if I had wealth I would help people but if I get that kind of wealth will I just become a wealth hoarder who tries to justify my riches as something I earned rather than something given to me through incredibly lucky circumstances? If I do help people is it because I’m a good person or out of guilt? Will I die alone? I feel like I drive everyone away with my clinginess, I get paranoid often and need reassurance often. It’s something I want to work on, something I’ve been trying to work on. Hearing that someone cares about me just never gets old. I value self awareness even if it’s painful.
(3.d)
Socializing:
I’m definitely a socially anxious/awkward mess, especially around strangers. I do feel a large amount of anxiety in public, people can’t tell by looking at my face since I kind of go stone faced in an attempt to block everything out but yeah you’ll notice that if we go out in public. Growing up my pediatrician said I was probably autistic, never got a formal diagnosis so that’s just great. But yeah that explains why I can’t make eye contact with people, I kinda just stare at the ground and avoid their gaze at all costs. A lot of these social struggles go away to a great degree once I know you for a bit but yeah I apologize for how terrible I am at socializing at first. Don’t let my social struggles fool you though, I love cuddling and being close with my person.
(3.e)
Sexuality:
I am a heterosexual male, though I’m not very masculine like at all. I may even be a bit feminine sometimes. Not that I believe any activity or manner of acting belongs to a gender but I don’t know how else to describe it. I’m definitely super affectionate and love it when my partner is too. I am open to dating demi people but I do have a libido so I don't think asexual would work out.
(4)
Interests:
(4.a)
Video Games:
As stated before, I do spend a lot of my time playing video games. It’s been hard lately with me having no energy but I really do want to play more games and have a good time playing them with you! I primarily play on PC though I do have a switch. I’m primarily into platform fighters, roguelikes, open world, survival, and sandbox games. As for single player story games, I enjoy watching them through twitch or youtube but for the most part I don’t play them myself. I’d watch you play them though!
Here’s a list of games we can play:
-Minecraft (Java)
-Risk of Rain 2
-Gunfire Reborn
-Roboquest
-7 Days to Die
-Phasmophobia
-Rust
-Unturned
-Bloons TD 6
-Platform fighters: Super Smash Bros. Melee, Slap City, Multiversus, Flash Party, Fraymakers
Whatever you want to play I’ll give it a shot! I will say that League bores me to death but I’ll play it for you :) I try to avoid MMOs, not because I don’t like them but because of how addicted I can get to them. I enjoy learning games in-depth so MMOs can be a fast track to addiction.
I recently got Kerbal Space Program 2 and ehhh not really worth it right now but hopefully later it will be? I’m super excited for Tears of the Kingdom! In the far off future I’m excited for Rivals of Aether 2 which is a platform fighter releasing in 2024, let me know of your most anticipated releases and I’ll see if I could play them with you!
Also I never got into FPS games but I could totally see myself playing like CoD with you or Escape From Tarkov. Any FPS really, I’m down.
I am a fan of Pokemon but with how things have been lately I don’t know how long that will last. Pixelmon is a common Pokemon mod I play for Minecraft if you want to play that! Also if I say I want to play something with you I mean it but there are often times when no matter how much I want to I'm just drained and can do little more than lay in bed so please don't think I'm making an excuse.
(4.b)
Science:
I really enjoy keeping up with the latest advances in pretty much everything, it could be biology, technology, astronomy, anything! I love seeing progression and I love talking about it! Really I could go on and on about what I’m obsessing about that day. I particularly love technology, ask me for my laptop specs I dare you. When I was little I always wanted to be a scientist of any kind but then insomnia and fear of college stuff hit me like a truck aaaand that’s the end of that dream.
(4.c)
Anime:
You got me, I like anime but I’d like to think my tastes are benign.
Here’s some of my favorites I can list from the top of my head:
- To Your Eternity
- Vinland Saga
- Spice and Wolf
- Re:Zero
- Mob Psycho
- Dr. Stone
- Attack on Titan
- Spy x Family
- My Hero Academia
- Ranking of Kings
- Demon Slayer
Okay I can go on and on but I will say I don’t like pointless fan service and the spamming of cliche anime moments. I mostly enjoy action and anything well animated if it doesn’t have a potato story. Heck Demon Slayer could be my top 3 out of season 2’s animation alone. I don’t watch slice of life often or romance but I would with you!
(4.d)
Misc:
I’m not going to go on and on about the tiniest little things when the main ones are covered but I’ll watch pretty much any show with you and anything really. I like random youtube videos that explain some kind of lore or mystery, sometimes mini documentaries too.
As for food I looove sushi and I’m a sucker for fast food. Okay and candy, definitely candy.
I used to play tennis but haven’t really had the opportunity nor friends to play it with and I’m way too socially anxious to seek it out. Also I will say that when we move to something like discord I type waaaay more casually. I’m not going to expect long paragraphs back and forth like we’re writing English papers for each other, I do enjoy long conversations but seriously don’t worry about having to put the utmost effort into every response, I just like making good first impressions I guess.
(5)
(5.a)
My Physical Characteristics:
I’m 5’8 (172cm), 128 pounds (58kg), with curly brown hair and blue eyes. I like keeping my hair long in the winter and cutting it in the summer. I’m pretty slim in general so if you’re looking for someone large, that’s not me. I don’t work out but my work is pretty physical so at least I’m not totally inactive. I don’t have the urge to work out or gain muscle but I do want to maintain my slim figure so if I start losing control of that I’ll work out. I like to keep my face shaved because I don’t think I look good with a beard/mustache so if you’re into those I apologize. I have an average amount of body hair? I’d prefer to be completely shaved but it’s easy to lose motivation with that battle, if you prefer shaved then I’d have no problem complying. Anyways here’s what I look like:
https://imgur.com/a/MZZgf2t (5.b)
My Physical Preferences:
Having physical preferences makes me feel shallow, if I could make myself not have them I would but unfortunately that’s now how that works. I don’t care if you’re shorter or taller than me and I don’t care if you weigh more or less than me. All I ask is that you’re slim-average weight. I would never ask for someone to be something I’m not. I don’t care about tattoos or piercings.**(6)Expectations of You (Relationship Only):**I am not looking for someone “exciting” or someone to “keep me on my toes” I’m not looking for someone to cater to my every whim or anything like that. I don’t care if you’re “boring” or if you aren’t “successful”. I know it’s a common thing for people to not want a “boring” relationship and to seek something argumentative or something with constant challenges but I just want to be with you. During the exciting times, the boring times, and everything in-between, all of it will be great with you! Maybe we do argue sometimes or maybe there will be challenges but that will never be something I purposefully seek out and I don’t want that to be something you seek out either. I will not play tricks on you and I will not play mind games, I expect the same from you. We all have personal measures of success we may or may not have lived up to but what I care about most is our commitment to each other. If we have each other we can get through tough times, near the ends of our lives I want us to look back and feel that this life together was worth more than anything. That’s not saying I want us to be haphazard, I don’t want us to make poor decisions for the sake of yolo and I want us to always be rational, especially with each other. I want you to be someone I can trust to make decisions and weigh the options with a level head, I’ll try my best to live up to the same for you. Most of all I want empathy, understanding, someone to feel the utmost comfort and trust in.
(7)
Living Situation:
Currently my life is pretty relaxed, I work 3 times a week as a night shift stocker. I currently live in a 2 bedroom apartment with my roommate but we’re looking to move into someplace larger by the end of the year if everything works out. The internet is weirdly great for Ohio too like I have fiber and later this year we’re supposed to be getting dedicated fiber so that’s neat. I’m not attached to Ohio so the ultimate goal living location wise is probably moving to a country that won’t send you into a lifetime of dealing with the repercussions from one medical emergency.
(8)
Deal Breakers:
Might as well make this simple and make it a list.
- Anti-vaxxers
- Unironically believing astrology
- Right wingers
- Hard drugs (occasional 420 and alcohol is fine, may even join you)
- Wanting children, there was a time when I was younger when I wanted children but with the state of the word that’s a definite no and I feel like I wouldn’t be able to handle the stress. I’d love a stress free life with as much time with you as possible.
- Homophobic
- Transphobic
- Racist
- Super Religious
- Don’t be a bigot and don’t deny facts.
(9)
Closing Remarks:
Well you made it, I was thinking that finding someone I’d be willing to put a lifetime of effort into at least required this much effort. If I think of anything more I’ll update the post. Also about timezones, it really doesn’t matter where in the world you are. I don’t have a sleep schedule and I have most of the week off from work so it really doesn’t matter.
I request that in your response you do put effort into it, it doesn’t have to be anywhere near as long as this but at least enough so I know that you read this and enough about you so I know why you saw potential compatibility. I will seriously read all of it and respond the best I can. I do also request a pic included in your response (sfw please) or one soon after we start talking to prove identity, I’ll send identity proving pics too. As long as this post is up, you can send a reply!
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2023.06.03 01:56 ItsnotAGPalone Is there anywhere lgbt friendly to go for my Gender issues in delhi
I don't have any money to pay for a private therapist, no one is going to give that much money in my family for no reason, i don't have the courage to tell them, even though i don't care if they know, its just i am not that brave. I hope there are some government hospital that provides it. Also i read a article on how they try to convert lgbt people forcefully in some places, so if there are some red flags, let me know.
Background
Its been bad, i have in such a bad condition internally for few weeks, my physical health has been started to decline too, maybe its the MCD water, but its been bad in other ways too. I unwillingly finished my male puberty around the age of 16, hated it, felt like some part of me dead inside, always wanted to be a girl since the age of 3-4, supressed my identity my whole childhood, grow up very masculine, hated feminity because that was convenient even though i wanted to be fem. Always hated myself and didn't knew why, felt gender euphoria crossdressing at age 14 when i first time dared to do it. For the past one year i was fine, though i had mild dysphoria it wasn't as crushing as it is now. Last time this was as bad as now was my final stage of puberty with the growth of beard ended. That phase of crippling depression lasted almost a year. Then i accepted my true identity and started believing in essentialism of gender, ie. there is something deep down in me, something essential, that makes me a girl, so I don't need to change my gender and for the last year, i tried to integrate my feminine identity with my assigned gender. And i changed, i finally found myself and my mental health was better then its been in last 8 years (i am almost 19), i still wanted to change my gender but i didn't felt much of a urgency because my dysphoria wasn't so bad as it was.
But then reality hit me when, my friends complementing-ly said they see me as thier elder bro figure, this struck me so bad, i just realised i was living in delusion, i thought i was being tomboyish and for the whole year, i saw myself as more feminine than i actually am, i was actually developing into a man and they obviously saw me as a positive masculine figure. And i am not flattered, just realised how delusional i was.
Now that i realised my masculine manliness, nothing feels good, nothing gives me euphoria, i would usually go into my fantasies to escape reality, but even that is not working. I tried to crossdress, felt even more dysphoric because i am reminded of my small hips and wide shoulders, i constantly hate the feeling of my face, how its shaped and how my beard feels.
I am even so masculine in my thinking and behaviour and i feel like I can't escape that. I am just too stoic, logical and blunt to be a girl. I can't escape myself. But on the other side i see feminine woman and cringe at thier feminity, while desperately wanted to look as feminine as them.
I don't dislike my male body, like i think i look good for a guy, its just not the way i prefer it to be. I don't have dysmorphia, its about the way it makes me feel about my gender, rather then how it looks.
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2023.06.03 01:50 Daregmaze I realized than what I actually want isn’t to escape the confines of gender, but the confines of biological sex.
I realized than what I actually want isn’t to escape the confines of gender, but the confines of biological sex.
See regardless of whatever label I might to describe myself, my biology will stay the same. Even if I decide to call my sex something else than the one I was assigned at birth, nothing will change physically. I’m still stuck at the same place. Looking back, I think this is is why I don’t feel comfortable using the trans/cis labels for myself, theses labels focuses on the sex you had at birth and completely ignore any medical modification you might do to it. And I think it’s also why transmeds views always made me feel uncomfortable: if you’re brain is either female or male, this basically means than you are still stuck with one sex despite the facts that you can medically change your sex AND that gender and sex are différents things, which is just even worse because it means you cannot find confort in the idea than your sex is purely physical anymore. You will always be stuck as your current sex even tho you can medically change it AND that gender and sex are separated. I also realized than the reason why my brain was kinda seeing my private parts as different wasn,t because of internalized mysoginy, but because of my dsiconfort. See I am actually confortable with my genitalia, but I am so scared that this would make me ''neurologically fe/male'', than my brain just modifies the way I perceive them so I can stop seeing them the same way than the other parts of my body.
I just wish there was a way for me to change my biological sex without drastically changing my physical appearance.
I would also like to point out than I don’t know why I feel bothered by thoses things, I know on a logical level than I do not have to feel confined by biological sex and that it doesn't actually confines me and that I can just decide than anything related to it can just fuck off from who I am as a person, but emotionallly I still feel trapped by it. The only I know is that I do NOT feel this way because I am ''not like the other girls'' or because I think women cannot do the same things than men
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Daregmaze to
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